Shenanigans in the Vantas-Makara Household

SUMMARY: … Or the four times Kankri "Signless" Vantas, Sr. and Kurloz "The Grand Highblood" Makara, Sr. got interrupted by their children (and mentally scarred some of them) and the one time they actually finished what they started.

PAIRING/S: GHB/Signless, Implied Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas

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Kankri, Jr.: Age 13 (13 Years Ago)

"Kurloz, the kids have school tomorrow," Kankri gasps out but he lets the larger man lift him on the kitchen counter, sighing as he spreads his legs and wraps them around his husband's hips, pulling him closer despite his earlier protest. "We have to wake up early in the morning."

Lips trail up his neck and Kankri bites his lips to keep from moaning as teeth clamp over his ear, hot breath tickling his cheek. "We never have any time together anymore. It's a fucking miracle I got to leave work early tonight."

It's true. Working as a teacher while taking care of his husband and four children and making sure their house (more like mansion, really) is still standing by the time they get home takes a lot more time and effort than Kankri expected. There's no doubt that he'd never trade his life for anyone else's but he can admit that it's certainly exhausting. Kurloz's time has also been taken over by work and several upcoming projects that take him all over the country for days at a time. He comes home late, too tired to eat, and wakes up early, leaving Kankri with a kiss on his cheek.

Kankri pulls away and looks at him now, really looks at him. He stares into his eyes and maybe he's right. There might not be a better time than now and he certainly wants something more than a quickie in a bathroom they manage to squeeze in every once in a while.

Kurloz had always been handsome but he looks so tired right now and just a little bit hopeful. There are bags under his blue-violet eyes and the wrinkles at their corners are more pronounced than before. His long hair is a mess of tangled curls and waves and probably needs a good washing and combing. He lays his smaller hands on his chest, hard and unyielding under an old Alternia University sweatshirt. He flattens his palms, spreading his fingers and moving his hands up to rest on those broad shoulders, down and then back up, one hand resting on his heart.

Yeah, maybe they should take this upstairs… but then, Kankri feels so comfortable where he is and Kurloz is already slipping his hands under his shirt, running his warm hands over his sides and his back, going to his chest and playing with his nipples.

Kankri muffles his moan at the crook of Kurloz's neck, leaning against the touch and arching his back as he runs his fingers through his thick hair, raining kisses on his face, nibbling on his jaw.

Then Kurloz stops, his fingers clamped around his hips but not doing anything. Kankri squirms against him impatiently but the hands on his hips keep him in place.

"So… Is that a yes, low blood?" he purrs and it makes Kankri bristle (the game they used to play coming to the forefront of his mind) but the heat that goes straight to his groin is a lot more intense.

Kankri growls, fingers digging into his shoulders. "What the fuck do you think, you asshole? Did all that Faygo melt what's left in that dusty thinkpan of yours? You want me to spell it out for you?"

Kurloz tilts his head, a smile playing at his lips. "You're spitting out all sorts of hoofbeast shit right now, little rebel. I think that mouth can be put to better use."

Kankri's eyes narrow as he slips easily into character and opens his mouth to retort.

"OH, MY GOD!" a young voice shrieked then a shrill whistle pierced the silence.

They spring away from each other and look at their son who has shut his eyes, one hand over his ear while the other gropes along the wall and still blowing on the bright, red whistle they bought for him last week.

"Kankri (and by Kankri he means the younger one – and they have to wonder sometimes why they thought it was a good idea to name their firstborns after them), stop that fucking racket or you'll wake up your brothers," Kurloz snaps and the boy opens his mouth. The whistle drops and dangles on his chest by a string tied around his neck.

"My eyes, my eyes, my eyes, my eyes," he chants as he steps a careful step back, one foot a time before he turns and runs out, his footsteps echoing down the hall.

Just like that, the mood between them shattered.

"I have to go talk to him," Kankri (the elder) sighs as he presses his forehead to his husband's. "Rain check?"

Kurloz presses a kiss to his lips and whispers, "I'll wait for you upstairs."

It should have been a bad idea because they really did have an early morning tomorrow and waking up will definitely be harder but it is tempting as hell.

Kankri gives in.

Kurloz, Jr.: Age 15 (11 Years Ago)

They are in their bedroom this time and the kids are busy doing their own things. Kankri, Jr. is in his room to work on a project with Porrim and Cronus, Kurloz, Jr. is finishing his chemistry paper, Gamzee is staying the night with Tavros and Karkat is at the Striders' residence studying with David. Tomorrow is Saturday – no school or work so they can afford to sleep and wake up late.

The room is dimly lit and the air is heavy as Kankri sits astride Kurloz's hips, hands braced on the headboard as he lifts his hips then sinks back down so painfully slow (up and down, up and down), sighing at the slide of a hot and hard cock inside him, his face lifted up to the ceiling as if in prayer.

Kurloz loves seeing him like this (even if he's beyond frustrated – being tied up and gagged). His hair is a disheveled mess of short curls, slightly damp as it stuck to his forehead and neck. His eyes, more red than brown in a certain light, are heavy-lidded, long lashes fluttering as he looks down at Kurloz, watching the tense set on his shoulders as he forced his body not to move while Kankri's in control.

His skin is temptingly dark and obviously flushed, smooth and supple and covered with a thin sheen of sweat and, at any other time, would be marked in bruising kisses that will last for a few days. He's much smaller than Kurloz – his shoulders are narrow and his body is wiry and slender unlike his broader and thicker frame. His muscles, corded and tense, flex and twitch when he makes even the smallest movement.

Kankri is just fucking breathtaking.

Then, something in some part of the house exploded.

He was so surprised that he jumped with a squeak, landing on his ass out of bed with a loud thud as Kurloz groans his displeasure around the silk gag on his mouth. He tugged at his arms, his hands still cuffed to the headboard.

"I hope nothing's on fire this time," Kankri says urgently as he grabs the nearest piece of clothing (Kurloz's shirt) and puts it on.

"Njds gfgnf fggj fjgnf fjflgn!"

"Oh, sorry, dear. Let me get you out of there."

Kurloz waits patiently as Kankri sets him free and he pulls the gag off himself. "Who in their motherfucking mind thought giving that little smartass a chemistry set was a good idea?!"

Kankri purses his lips but he's definitely trying not to burst out laughing. "You did, dear."

Kurloz sighs and knocks his head on the headboard. "I'm going to look at the damage and knock some sense into that boy." Which means that the chemistry set will be confiscated and Kurloz, Jr. will be grounded indefinitely, Kankri translates. As if he heard his thoughts, Kurloz narrows his eyes at his husband. "Shut up."

This time, Kankri doesn't stop himself from chuckling. "I didn't say anything."

Karkat: Age 12 (8 Years Ago)

"Out of my kitchen!"

Kurloz rolls his eyes and doesn't bother to let go of Kankri who is struggling to pull away so he can jump off the table. "If I remember right, I'm the one paying the goddamn mortgage here."

"I don't give a fuck!"

"Karkat! Language!" Kankri scolds his youngest but the boy is obviously distraught.

"We make food here! We eat here!" he screams at them, looking betrayed and disappointed with them behind his fury. "If you two are feeling horny, do it in your bedroom, for God's sake!"

He stomps away, tugging at David's hand and leading him presumably to his bedroom.

"When I catch him and that kid macking, I'll never let him forget it," Kurloz mumbles grudgingly.

Kankri patted him on the cheek.

Gamzee: Age 16 (5 Years Ago)

"Do you know how many kids lose their parents to divorce and shit? Too many… Your great love is a motherfucking miracle. I am the lucky witness to –"

"Gamzee, you are not watching us have sex and you are definitely not recording this. Go to your room. Now."

Damn. Kankri is gorgeous when he's angry.

Current Ages:

Karkat: 20

Gamzee: 21

Kurloz and Kankri: 26

"Look at yourself… the holy, MOTHERFUCKING SAVIOR, DEFENDER to the LOW BLOODS, REBEL to Her Condescension's armies and ENEMY to the MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS... legs spread LIKE A COMMON WHORE. You like this, low blood? Do you feel MY BULGE SPREADING YOU? Feel EVERY LITTLE INCH OF ME inside that hungry nook of yours?"

"Why don't you shut the hell up and show me what you really got?" the Signless growls breathlessly as he digs his nails sharply on the Grand High Blood's back, his knees resting on the other's shoulders, his body rocked over and over as the thrusts become savagely fast and hard and rough. "You're not really doing a pretty good job here, clown."

He breaks off into a low, choked moan as the Grand High Blood nearly pulls off all the way then plunges into him with unrelenting accuracy, hitting his prostate over and over until his toes begin to curl, head thrown back in ecstasy. His voice rises and he couldn't care less about who would hear them because the house is empty and the kids won't be coming by until later.

"Ah, yes! YES, right there! Kurloz, Kurloz, hurry! Harder, come on, please! Please, hurry!"

Spurred on, Kurloz's thrusts become erratic as he felt Kankri's mucles clamp around him, the heat pooling in his belly, unraveling as he takes Kankri over the edge and falls right along with him.

Kurloz lays on Kankri, his weight warm and comforting as Kankri holds on to him and wraps his legs around his waist instead. They share kisses between them, soft and tired and sated, murmuring sweet words at each other.

It takes a while for their breathing to calm down and Kurloz kisses Kankri's temple.

"You broke character."

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Author's Note: Comments are welcome. I hope you like it.