I. Am. A. Fucking. Idiot. I literally had this whole thing done and all I had to do was copy and paste the damn thing into a doc but NOOOO I had to accidentally click paste instead of the copy button, so it got deleted. All of it. So now, I am forced to rewrite the whole damn thing. Before this was where I apologized for being MIA but now it turned into my rant space, sorry. Anyways if any of this feels rushed or something just remember I had to rewrite this, anyways enjoy I guess...
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Santana had been sitting in this chair for hours now, listening to the constant, stable beep of the heart monitor. She didn't mind, it was a reminder that she was still here, that she was still alive.
Since getting the call from Judy telling her that Quinn had gotten into an accident with a huge truck, Santana had been here ever since.
She was sat in the less than comfortable hospital chair that was placed impossibly close to Quinn's hospital bed. Both of her hands were clasped over Quinn's left hand, and she hadn't let go since she came in the room. Which was hours ago. It was around one in the morning now, and Santana had barely moved from this spot. She just sat there holding Quinn's hand and hoping for any movement. The doctor had said that Quinn was in a coma and that they didn't know exactly when she would recover. He said that it could be anywhere from days, to months.
When morning came, Santana still had not fallen asleep and she didn't regret it. If Quinn was going to wake up and she wasn't there, she would never forgive herself. It was a school day however and since Judy knew that Santana had not slept she let her stay with Quinn and told her very strictly to make sure that she got some rest.
This time, when Judy got back from work and got to the hospital, she told Santana to go home. Santana refused but gave in when Judy said that her parents were worried about her and wanted her home every night. She did have to go to school after all.
Santana didn't want to go to school. She would have much rather stayed with Quinn, because during the school day Judy had work so no one was there with her. But, school was a must, and her parents would know if she skipped it.
So she went to school everyday like she was supposed to, went to her classes, did her work, and when it was time for Glee she sat in the chair furthest away from the group. All through the day she never spoke. She just kept her HBIC mask on and glared at anyone who questioned her.
The Glee clubbers were all confused as to why Santana was acting this way. They all knew about Quinn's accident and were sad themselves but they were never close to the blonde and carried on like nothing happened. That was why Santana kept her distance. She didn't get how they could all be so blase about Quinn. She was being torn apart on the inside and it just got worse everyday that Quinn was still in that hospital. Yet here they were dancing around and singing as if Quinn didn't exist. There were multiple times where she was tempted to get up and just leave or yell at one of the Gleeks but she kept her resolve and just waited until it was time to leave.
She never said goodbye to anyone, she didn't even give them a second glance before getting up and driving straight to the hospital. They were also confused why she acted like this. Before, Santana and Quinn could barely keep a conversation without breaking out into an argument. So there was no reason why Santana should act like this. She hated Quinn, right?
So that's how they did it everyday. When Santana came back from school she would go straight to the hospital and stay with Quinn. She did her homework there and read to Quinn.
That was something that Santana knew about Quinn that no one else knew. She loved literature. Poems, novel, anything and everything. So everyday after she had finished her work, Santana would read Quinn one of her favorite pieces. Whether it was her favorite poem, a chapter from her favorite book, sometimes Santana would even sing to her. When she was with Quinn all of her walls were down.
Then when Judy got back from work, they would switch out and Santana would go home. But, not before giving Quinn a kiss on the cheek. She did this every night,alternating from one cheek to the other. This, Judy did not know about. No one did.
But Quinn knew.
It had been two weeks. Two weeks since Quinn went into the hospital, two weeks since Santana's daily visits. Two weeks filled with reading and singing. Two weeks full of cheek kisses. Santana never cried. Not even once.
People cry when others die, or leave. But Quinn was still here, she hadn't passed, she hadn't left. If Santana cried that would mean that she gave up and that she had lost Quinn. And she couldn't lose Quinn, she won't.
It was a Saturday and Santana had just finished reading a chapter of How to Kill a Mockingbird. She was holding onto Quinn's hand like she did everyday. She picked up Quinn's poetry book, and flipped to one of the bookmarked pages. The poem was one of Quinn's favorites but it was also one of Santana's favorites. It basically described her. She started to read it to Quinn, but she didn't need to look at the page to know the words, she had them memorized. So she decided instead to look at Quinn's face. She really wanted to look into Quinn's eyes but not having that as a choice she settled for her face.
Teetering on the edge
Of losing my mind
A reason to get up everyday
Is getting harder to find
And everyday its harder
To keep my mind off you
You have no idea
Of the hell you put me through
I wish that I could tell you
What you mean to me
Somehow make you understand
Somehow make you see
I used to not believe
In the stupid concept of love
But then one day I met you
And you looked like you were sent from above
I'm slowly going crazy
From the longing to be by your side
Never before have I felt like this
You're taking me on a wild ride
I know we'll never be together
But you dominate my thoughts and dreams
The way I get butterflies when you're around
I'm in love with you it seems
I wish I could forget about you
And go back to normal life
But I'm finding it to be hopeless
So I'll sit here and reason with this knife
As Santana finished the poem, she felt Quinn's hand move. Her eyes shot open at the movement and was removing her hand from Quinn's to buzz the nurse when Quinn's hand squeezed hers. Seemingly not wanting her to let go, so she didn't. She reached her other hand out and called in the nurse.
After she hit the button, she looked down to see Quinn's eyes fluttering open. When they opened Quinn looked at Santana in weird way, and she gave Santana a smile small. When the nurse appeared at the door, she smiled at the sight of Quinn awake and holding Santana's hand. When Santana saw Quinn looking past her she turned around and saw the nurse, she put her mask back on but kept her hand in Quinn's.
The nurse left to get a doctor and Santana looked back at Quinn. Her face softened again. "Hi," Santana whispered, not wanting to disturb the room's peacefulness, "hey," Quinn said back, it was such a soft response that anyone other than Santana wouldn't have heard it. But she was glad she heard it, she hadn't heard the girl's voice for two and a half
Before any of them could say anything else, the doctor and nurse came back into the room. They told Santana that she had to leave so that they could stabilize Quinn. Santana started to argue when she felt Quinn's thumb brush against the back of her hand. Quinn was reassuring her that she could leave. So she squeezed Quinn's hand once again and then left to wait outside like she was instructed.
After exactly eleven minutes, well as exact as counting in your head can be, the doctor and the nurse came out, and Santana shot out of her seat, and looked at them expectantly. "Well, now that we have examined and stabilized Miss Fabray, we can confirm that she is indeed completely awake." Santana's smile could not have gotten bigger. "We need to call her legal guardian however, do you know where she is?" "Yeah, she is still at work," the doctor nodded "Then you will have to stay with her until we can contact her mother or until her mother arrives herself." Santana nodded and they left.
She took a deep breath before opening the door. She saw Quinn sitting against the headboard and drinking from a cup of water. Quinn looked up when she heard the door open. She smiled and started to reach over and try and put away the cup.
Santana rushed over and grabbed the cup from Quinn and placed it on the bedside table for her. Quinn looked at her at smiled sheepishly,"Thanks," she mumbled, Santana looked up and Quinn saw the anger on Santana's face. "Your selfish," Santana whispered, "what?" Quinn asked confused. "I said that you're selfish!" Santana basically yelled "You're selfish and you're stupid!" "Why were you being so selfish? Did you not think about what would happen? Did you think at all or were you just being plain stupid? Actually I know you aren't stupid, you have the second highest GPA in the whole school for crying out loud!" Quinn was surprised that Santana knew about that, she thought that she did a good job of keeping that a secret.
"You're such a selfish bitch! Why didn't you think of the people that love you? That care about you? How did you think that they were going to react?"
Santana's voice lowered, "Did you think that no one cared about you?" "Because I care about you Quinn."
While she was yelling Santana had moved around the room and now she was standing right next to Quinn's bed, the spot that she had been sitting at for the past two and a half weeks. When Santana lifted her head to look at Quinn, Quinn saw that there were tears on her face.
She reached out and grabbed Santana's hand. And just like that Santana broke. All of the tears that she didn't shed were spilling out of her, and she was sobbing.
Quinn quickly pulled Santana onto the too small hospital bed and held the sobbing girl in her arms. Santana was apologizing over and over again, for yelling at Quinn and for everything. Quinn just rubbed comforting circles onto Santana's back and shushing her, "Stop apologizing Santana," After a few minutes Santana's sobs finally died down and she was shaking against Quinn, her head still on the blonde's chest.
"I'm sorry," she said again, "No, San, stop it you were right what I did was stupid, and I wasn't thinking." Santana shook her head and sighed, "I was mean, I'm sorry," she whispered. "It's okay, " Santana shook her head again, "San look at me," Santana slowly lifted her head up and looked into Quinn's eyes, "It's okay" Santana just nodded, she lost all of her words. Just like every other time she looked into those eyes.
Those eyes. Those stupid gorgeous hazel eyes. Those eyes that were green one second then gold the next. Those eyes that made her lose her words. Those eyes that she got lost in every time she looked at them. Those eyes that made her fall in love with Quinn.
She lost all of her words again, just like every other time she looked into Quinn's eyes. She tried to speak, but she couldn't, so she didn't. She just kissed her.
But, before Quinn could respond, Santana pulled away and jumped off of the bed. Her eyes were wide open and her jaw was dropped in shock.
"Oh my, I didn't, that was, I just," Santana started rambling. Quinn was shocked too but she got a hold of herself and just shook her head and motioned for Santana to sit back down. She reluctantly did, and Quinn pulled her into her arms again.
They stayed like that for a few seconds until Santana pulled away and started saying, "I'm sorr-" she stopped when she saw Quinn shaking her head. "Stop," Quinn whispered, Santana kept her eyes at Quinn's neck, not wanting to look into her eyes and have a repeat of last time.
Quinn put her hand under Santana's chin and lifted her head up, making their eyes meet. Quinn just kept them like that, for a little bit. Staring into each other's eyes.
Then, she pulled Santana's face closer and kissed her. Santana was frozen from shock at first, but then quickly recovered and kissed back.
The kiss wasn't rushed, or sloppy, it was filled with feelings, and emotions.
All of the unsaid words, the pushed back thoughts , and the hidden feelings all came out in the kiss. It didn't matter if it was short or in a random hospital room, it was right. Because she was right.
After about a minute, they both pulled back.
Santana was still shocked, and when she opened her eyes she saw Quinn looking at her with a glow in her eyes and a shy smile with a pink blush on her cheeks. "Don't apologize," Quinn said softly. Santana just nodded, she was still surprised that Quinn had kissed her.
Seeing Santana's still shocked, Quinn asked, "Hello? Earth to San?" then she leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on the tip of Santana's nose. This made Santana giggle and finally recovered.
It was just a simple gesture but it still made Santana's heart flutter. It was that same simple gesture that made Santana finally confess her feelings to Quinn.
She smiled warmly at the blonde before saying, "I love you Quinn." Quinn's eyes opened in surprise at Santana's sudden outburst, and for a second Santana thought that she shouldn't have said that and her thoughts were running a mile a minute, but they were cut off by Quinn asking, "What about Brittany?" Quinn lowered her head when she asked the question not being able to look at Santana again. Santana could hear the disappointment and jealousy in Quinn's voice, even though she barely whispered it.
"No, Quinn, I love you" Santana reassured her, but Quinn just shook her head as if she didn't believe Santana. So Santana placed her hand under Quinn's chin like Quinn had done earlier, and pulled her in for another kiss.
She put everything into the kiss to try and convince Quinn that she loved her, and when she pulled away,she didn't have the chance to speak before she was stopped when seeing the tears in Quinn's eyes. "I love you too Santana," "I always have."
WELL, that was a waist of three damn days. Sorry I realized that I haven't used bad words until this story. Whatever, you guys don't mind right? I hope not. So yeah this is kinda a sorry for no updates on any of my stories, but I literally woke up one day with this idea, so yeah...BYEEEE