DISCLAIMER: YET AGAIN I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE HARRY POTTER WORLD, I JUST LIKE TO FIDDLE WITH IT.

prompt: last kiss by taylor swift

P.S. Thank you for user SunlightHurtsMyEyes, your comment was something I really appreciate and cherish. I'm glad someone out there is reading and enjoying this! :)

I never felt like this before. I never felt like this, this much pain; not even after Teddy or Lorcan. And I was plenty in love with them, or I know I think I loved them. I never felt this empty, this lost, this broken. I shuddered and remembered every detail in his face. The planes, the angles, the hairline. His face was burning bright, burning through the darkness that had swallowed me. I sighed. I remembered everything, all those things that torture me, that seemed like they would torture me forever.

Soft whispers and feather like caresses. Lies about how much you loved me. I know they're lies because the picture of you leaving burns in the back of my mind, almost bright enough to block every other moment out, but not quite. The day you left? The day you got on that aeroplane and said goodbye? It was raining that day and I walked home in the rain because the rain was lovely and the rain disguised the tears falling from my face. I had never felt as much pain as I did that day. And you know what Teddy did to me, what Lorcan did to me. Yet you still left. You left because who can fix a damaged package? No, you just send the package back until you get a new one. That's the cycle. That's the way it works. It's just... I never thought you send me off. In a way I thought you didn't care, mind, oh I don't know. I thought you maybe you were too lazy to send me off. I see now everything I thought is wrong. You were just bidding your time. I wished you didn't. It wouldn't have hurt as much.

I glance up at the darkening skies. It's raining. It's raining like what happened that same day you left, almost like the gods are mocking me. I close my eyes and wrap myself closer around your jumper. It smells like you. But that smell is nearly gone and it reminds me, it makes me feel like I can physically feel you forget. I can feel you forget everything about me. That you had forgotten me already. And... I don't know. I don't know how to make you not forget me. I'm nothing special, I'm really not. I'm the uglier Veela, I'm the middle child, I'm the girl whose so average it hurts. But I still didn't imagine you leaving me like you did. I shouldn't have let you go. I should've known someone brighter and shinier would step in your pathway. I should've known that things for me didn't come easily. I should've known that I didn't stand chance. The Fates had it in for me since the beginning. I still didn't think it'll end like this. I still didn't think that, that last kiss at the airport we be our last. And it hurts. You name is forever the name on my lips, tearstained and broken. I think I really, truly loved you. How couldn't I? You were just about my best friend in the whole world. I may have been damaged but you healed some cracks, bandaged some wounds and fed me love like medicine. But who knows, maybe it wasn't love just pity. I close my eyes and the tears fall like they do every other day. But there's something within me that knows. I know this is the last time. I will not hurt myself anymore. I will try, try very hard to not think of you anymore. I know that I should try to love myself before I try to make others love me. I will try to love my roughed up edges, my burn areas and my scars. I will try because I am stronger than that, that my belief in my self should be my first priority. The doorbell rings and my eyes flutter open. It's 2am in the morning. Victorie isn't supposed to take me bridesmaid shopping until 8. Something... That I hope I can get out of. Maybe I can feign sickness, but I know somewhere that it isn't Victorie. It doesn't feel like it. I hesitate before lifting myself off the floor. I hope and not hope that its Molly. While Molly makes a horrible cup of tea, Molly is better than Rose who'll just reprimand me and tell me that moping isn't good for me. I don't believe I'm that. I believe tears are your body's need to express itself but Rose will just call me a pathetic artist and hurl me out the door. I got Rose last week so please be Molly in this situation and not Rose. I don't want to cry in front of anyone today. I don't want badly made tea, confrontations or hopelessness. I just... I want time for my scars to heal.

The door clicks open and I feel like my heart is in my mouth. The rain pours down and suddenly it sounds like the I'm drowning in rain. In its sounds, smells, taste and feel. I don't know if what I'm seeing is real, I'm not sure if I'm hallucinating or not.

"Hey Dom."

"Lysander."

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