Existing

Even standing in the middle of the crowded Hogsmeade streets, Narcissa had never felt quite so alone.

There were people everywhere, milling around her and bumping into her and stepping on her toes, but she could not have felt more isolated if the village were empty.

There was a letter clutched in her hand, but she hadn't read past the first paragraph yet.

Dear Cissy, the letter began. Our sister Andromeda has been blasted from the family tree for inappropriate relations with a Mudblood. From this day forward, we are not to speak to her, or refer to her, or acknowledge her existence in any way whatsoever.

In Narcissa's other hand was a sealed envelope holding the exciting news that Lucius Malfoy had proposed. It was addressed to Andromeda, written in green ink and sealed with wax, and Narcissa had been on her way to mail it at the Hogsmeade Post Office when the family owl swooped down and dropped this letter in her hand, instead.

From this day forward, we are not to speak to her.

Narcissa looked around for somewhere to sit. She knew there were benches in the post office, but she didn't want to go in there anymore, couldn't even look at it without wanting to cry, so she ducked into the nearest pub she saw - the Hog's Head.

There were no other Hogwarts students here. Narcissa was the youngest by at least thirty years, and nobody even looked up as she came through the door and all but fell into a chair.

"What can I get you?" the bartender asked. "Butterbeer? Firewhiskey, if you're of age? Or even if you're not. Doesn't much matter to me."

She was of age, but all she asked for was a glass of water.

"Coming right up." The bartender reached into a cupboard to grab a dirty glass and filled it up in the sink.

Narcissa shook her head. "Not - not that one, please," she said. "Water in a clean glass."

The bartender grumbled a bit, but he made a show of squirting soap into the glass and drying it off with a rag before filling it up again.

Narcissa saw little streaks of dirt still running down the side of her glass, but she didn't press the matter any further. She hadn't forgotten the letters in her hand. Shaking a little, she pulled out Bellatrix's letter again and resolved to read it all the way through.

Dear Cissy,

Our sister Andromeda has been blasted from the family tree for inappropriate relations with a Mudblood. From this day forward, we are not to speak to her, or refer to her, or acknowledge her existence in any way whatsoever.

We are also never to bring up any memories involving her. I know we had good times as children, but Andromeda has chosen to betray us, and we must shun her from every aspect of our lives. It will be hardest on you, I think. Mother has been crying, and Father shouted some, but you were the closest to her.

Narcissa blinked hard.

I hope your NEWTs are going well, and I hope Lucius is treating you nicely. Can't wait to see you again when summer holidays come round.

Love,

Bella

Narcissa looked down at the sealed letter in her hand. She knew she was supposed to stay loyal to her family - knew she had to stay loyal to her family, knew she had no other choice. But who did she choose when her family was split into pieces? Who should she trust? The ones who hadn't disgraced themselves? Or the only member of her family she really loved?

(Or was she on her own in this world no matter what, and merely existing meant having to be alone?)

"Is there anything else I can get for you?" the bartender asked, eyeing her untouched glass.

Narcissa looked up. "No," she said, crumpling the letter in her fist. "I'm fine." She put both letters on the table and walked out into the crowded streets of people she didn't know.


[Legendary Gods&Goddesses Challenge: Hestia - write about someone dedicated to family]

[The Book Thief Competition: "There were people everywhere on the city street, but the stranger could not have been more alone if it were empty."]

[Death Eater Competition: Narcissa]

[Acrostic-y Challenge of Chapter Titles: E, "Every time I look over there, I want to cry"]