"That's it, Lionblaze, I really am going to fire you if this continues!"

"I'm sorry! The ice cream was so delicious! I didn't know it would drip!"

"Just turn the camera on and get on with the show!"

"Okay…"

Lionblaze holds the camera and stands behind it while Jayfeather walks up to the center of the room. He sits down on his chair and moves some papers out of the way, resting his front paws on the table in front of him.

"Welcome to another episode of Ask Jayfeather," the grey tabby introduces. His ear twitches. " And let's pretend we hear some cheers in the distance or something. Now," he hints to Lionblaze, "we'll start with the questions."

The golden tom rushes to the side and grabs today's questions, all neatly printed on papers and in perfect order until he ruined them. Jayfeather groans and starts considering the options of hiring a new assistant and cameracat. But Lionblaze interrupts his thoughts as he starts reading the first question.

"Questions from peaceloveandmooshrooms again," Lionblaze reads, putting on glasses and examining the paper. "First question: have you ever played truth or dare?"

Jayfeather narrows his unseeing blue eyes.

"If I haven't, I wouldn't have gotten stuck in a pink tutu, now would I?!" Jayfeather snaps, irritated at bringing that up again. He glares at Lionblaze.

"Calm down, Jay," Lionblaze sighs and gives a sheepish laugh. "Next question: who do you like more, Seedkit or Lilykit?"

Jayfeather considers it for a second. He flicks his tail and shakes his head. "I honestly can't answer that. I'd say I like them both equally. I can't choose between two kits."

"Hey, I saw you secretly give that mouse to Lilykit!" Lionblaze argues.

"Shut up! Next question!"

Lionblaze shrugs and looks at the next one. "You're not gonna like this."

"What?"

Lionblaze takes a deep breath and replies, "Last question from peaceloveandmooshrooms: do you like Willowshine?"

"GREAT STARCLAN, DANG IT!"

"Oh, just answer!"

"No, I don't like any she-cat! Can't anyone understand that?"

Lionblaze threw away the paper. "Guess not." He reached for the new ones. "Birdsong33 has three questions, and nothing about your love life!"

Jayfeather throws his paws in the air and sighs. "Thank you!"

Lionblaze begins, "If there was a giant waffle in the middle of camp one morning, and nobody else saw it, what would you do?"

Jayfeather puts on a big smile and answers in a sweet voice, "Well, of course I'd share it with my dear brother Lionblaze!"

Lionblaze stares in horror at him. "JAY, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?!"

"Okay, fine, I'd eat it by myself!"

Lionblaze taps his tail against the floor. "That's more like it." He looks at the next question and his amber eyes widen. "What in StarClan?! Why would any cat think of doing that?!"

Jayfeather twitches an ear and gazes at the tom. "What is it?"

"Why haven't you fired Lionblaze yet? I'd personally get Hollyleaf to do it, she's WAY more obedient!" Lionblaze sticks his tongue out at the camera.

Jayfeather fell silent and hummed to himself. "Hmm… not a bad idea…"

Lionblaze's orbs stretch wide. "Wait, Jay, are you seriously going to–"

"Next question!"

The golden tom makes puppy-dog eyes, but eventually says the last question, "On a rating of 1 to 10, how much does this question annoy you?"

Jayfeather looks up at the ceiling, as if getting his thoughts from there.

"Hm. Probably 1,000."

"Well, aren't you just pleasant?" Lionblaze rolls his eyes, but his gaze brightens again as he reads the next questions.

"Sent in by XxSilverslashxX," Lionblaze begins, " this user asks: did you ever eat a scone? Do you like ice cream? And why are you so grumpy?"

Jayfeather furrows his brows in confusion. "What in StarClan is a scone?"

"I think it's some kind of food," Lionblaze thinks aloud. "Or else why would you eat it?"

"Let's hope it's food," Jayfeather sighs. "No, I haven't. I'm only beginning the road to Twoleg food, don't rush me!"

Lionblaze shrugs. "So, do you like ice cream?"

Jayfeather glares at the camera, which was now covered in melted ice cream which Lionblaze had not been able to scrub off from his snack from earlier.

"No, but I know someone who does," Jayfeather growls.

"What? They're really good!"

"Oh, well. I'll probably replace you with Hollyleaf later when I call her in StarClan," Jayfeather face-paws. "Anyway, what's the third question again?"

"Why are you so grumpy?"

Jayfeather's right eye twitches. He flicks his ear and taps his tail against the chair. Then he explodes.

"I AM NOT GRUMPY!"