We All, Hapless.
3/3

...o0o...

"The shrimp is good," I found myself saying, looking over the menu like I didn't read it nearly weekly. From across the table, I was still being pinned with a hard look.

"Hn."

"Or the chicken, even."

Suddenly the back of the menu that I'd felt like I was actually talking to was thudded to the table. "This is weird you know."

"Absolutely," I didn't even bother to look up. "I don't recommend the pork, it's not very good here."

"What are we doing, Itachi?"

"We're getting lunch, then you're coming back to the apartment, where you're staying over; that's the plan, anyway."

"No, I mean," Sauske was suddenly leaning against the table and I felt the need to look up and actually pay attention to the conversation for now. "I haven't heard from you in months, aside from the stuff Kakashi relays- so you calling me out of the blue-"

"I know, it was 'kind of weird'." And then I was pinning him with a very open, obviously affect look. "But I don't think we should talk about that here." And for once, my idiot little brother, actually decided to listen to me and shut his mouth for another few minutes. Then the waitress popped up at the end of our table and all he said even then was limited to what he was ordering.

"How's Kakashi?" I decided to ask as the waitress disappeared back into the back. Sauske immediately shrugged.

"Still annoying as ever," he replied easily, "I swear, if it wasn't for Iruka I would have killed him years ago." I let out a small chuckle.

"I can imagine," was all I had to offer, but in a rare show, Sauske continued.

"Yeah, I bet you can, since you never come by anymore." I could have swore he sulked.

"Well, hopefully that will be more of an option soon." And he was looking at me quizzically again.

"How's Hana," he decided to ask then. And I didn't stop the small chuckle that decided to burst from my throat.

"Dealing with her own mess of problems soon," I decided to say. This was the part where things could get messy.

"Like?"

"Her mother."

Sauske had no response to that for a moment, his eyes still just pinning me with a look that said he was reading into the conversation like I knew he would. "Tsume?"

"Yes."

"How's she a problem?"

For me, most of the time speaking of Tsume was like wadding through a mine field. There were some questions about her that would make me flinch, others that would make me blow up.

"She's always been a problem." And it was true, nearly half of the problems I'd partaken in over my life, could be related back to Tsume. The first small number of spats Kisame and I had had, were because of me living with Hana, which was because we still pretended to be together at times, because of Tsume. Anko once punched me in the face because she misunderstood a bruise on Hana's hip where she'd run into the counter for a hickey... and by some leap of her imagination, I had put it there- because we lived together, because of Tsume. It was always little things like that.

But I'd always told Hana I'd take those problems, if they left her happy at the end of the day. I just didn't know how to explain that to Sauske right then- not that I hadn't been wondering how for days.

o0o

After the diner I took him back to my apartment. And without much interlude, as he wondered around the living room, I began to talk.

"I'm not dating Hana, nor have I ever been." At that proclamation Sasuke was fully turned around and giving me an odd look. "In high school, we were friends- she was one of few people I could actually stand."

"You always were a loner," he added in quickly. I only nodded before continuing.

"Our classmates assumed, and we did nothing to dissuade them. Hana has always preferred women." At that Sauske quickly moved himself over to the arm chair and sunk down. "Tsume never knew, because the one time Hana had tried to tell her, Tsume refused, adamantly, to listen." Sauske gave a small nod, as if he knew this. I wondered, but continued. "Hana and I continued the pretenses of dating until college, when we did live together, but she had a short-term girlfriend from the community college. She started at SAMI," Sauske suddenly looked confused, "without telling Tsume, last winter. She's in the core, with me." He was nodding slowly. "She's dating one of the other female members. They live together, a few blocks from here."

Still looking confused, Sauske slowly formed a question, "Then why do you still live in a two bedroom?"

"She stays over sometimes, or any other random member of the core. The second bedroom is handy." He gave a small nod, still looking like he was trying to catch up.

I gave him a few moments, before continuing. "Her partner's name in Anko," Sauske was listening again, "The two of them aren't exactly discreet. They set me up with someone a few times, but none of them actually panned out. Until, recently." He was now looking at me like I had a second head.

"Is the part where you tell me you're gay, and we mutually decided living with Kakashi warped us?" I had to chuckle.

"Though I doubt it has much to do with Kakashi," he gave a small indignant sound, "Yes." He merely nodded.

"I figured that's where this story was going."

"But the actual problem wasn't you." He looked confused again. "A different friend of ours from the core's little brother is dating Kiba."

"Kankuro?" He was asking immediately. I gave a small pause.

"Yes," I feel like it was phrased accidentally like a question.

"You and Hana were always close, right?" I think I got where he was going. "Kiba told me about a year ago- or more like he decided he'd confided in me when Naruto and I got together."

"I was wondering."

"He's an idiot."

"I wish I agreed." Sauske was then listening again. "Tsume's tough. On their own, I doubt either Hana or Kiba would have had the nerve to tell her." Sauske gave a small nod.

"But they're both-"

"And that's why I figured I should have a big/little brother chat with you, so that when you heard Hana was out, you wouldn't have to draw your own conclusions." Sasuke gave a small nod.

"Makes sense, I guess."

...o0o...

That's it for now.
Life's just to much sometimes.

Laters,
-Aseru