AN: I honestly have no idea what I'm doing. But I hope this turns out well.

Basically, I just wanted to write something for SNK.

I'm sorry if it's bad.

But it's super gay.

So enjoy.

Chapter 1: Drabbles of a Romance Novelist

Avory gasped as Jared swept her off her feet.

Eww. No.

Avory… Avory gasped as Jared…cupped her jaw in his hands.

Oh, God no. Barf.

Avory gasped as Jared… stabbed her violently in the chest with a spoon.

Armin sighed and sat back in his chair. Romantic scenes sucked. You had to do it just the right way, or it was awkward to read. He never understood what was so challenging about these kinds of scenes. It was just a guy and a girl. Why was it always so hard?

"Maybe because you're gay." He mumbled under his breath, leaning back in his chair and lifting his coffee cup to his mouth. He heard the sound of chair-against-floor sounding from behind him, and turned to face it.

"What did you just say to me?" A tall, dark-haired man with an intimidating mustache stood above Armin, clenching his fists at his sides.

Armin's eyes widened in confusion. "H-huh?"

"You called me gay, didn't you?" He shoved Armin, and the frail blonde fell forwards out of his chair. Armin shook his head and held up his hands, beginning to tremble. "N-no, that was j-just… a misunderstanding, I-I-"

"You little bitch!" The man swung at Armin, who squealed and held his hands up over his face. But the pain never came.

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave, sir." A new voice said, calmly but sternly. Armin peeked out from behind his arm to see what might have just been the most attractive men he had ever seen gripping the arm of his attacker.

He was tall, and thin, but muscular. He had thin golden eyes that peeked out from behind his dusty brown bangs and his skin was just a shade below Armin's own. Most likely as smooth as silk. He was wearing a Starbucks apron, and god did he look good in it. Armin tried not to drool.

"What the - lemme go, punk!" The first man yanked his arm away, but Hottie held tight.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave, sir." Hottie repeated, a bit louder this time. The man glanced down at his apron, and scowled.

"Lemme go. I'm leavin'." He grumbled. Hottie released his arm and he exited, muttering various swear words under his breath. The bell rang as the door closed behind him.

"You okay?" Armin snapped out of his trance and blinked a couple times. Hottie was standing over him, holding a hand out. Armin nodded slowly and took it. It was rough and had a firm grip. And warm. And not sweaty, like Armin's probably was.

"Y-yeah… I'm fine…" He brushed his blonde hair out of his eyes as Hottie pulled him off the floor. "Th-thanks, umm…" He glanced down at his name tag.

"Jeen…?"

"It's pronounced Jean, like John but fancier."

"Oh. Jean. Hi. I'm, umm, Armin."

"Nice to meet you, Armin."

"Yeah. N-nice." Armin couldn't stop staring at his face. It was absolute perfection.

Hott - Jean, ehem, laughed. "Yeah. Nice. I see you here a lot. You're always typing away at that keyboard. Are you writing something?" He leaned to the left to get a better look at Armin's laptop. Armin blushed slightly and shook his head.

"No- I mean, yes… maybe. Not telling." He reached for the laptop, but Jean was already reading from the screen.

"'I'm yours forever, Jared. Nothing you can say can change that.' Avory called after him. He turned and stared, before sprinting back to her. Avory gasped as Jared stabbed her violently in the chest with a … spoon?' Some story you're writing." He laughed. Armin blushed a bright red and slammed the laptop shut.

"Th-that's nothing! Just… d-drabbles." He stuttered. Jean stared.

"Drabbles?" He questioned. Armin covered his face and swiped his laptop off the table, tucking it under his arm. "Ramblings. Nothing. I-I'm sorry, I-I have t-to go…" He could feel Jean's eyes on his backside as he swiftly sprinted out of the coffee shop.

AN: Why does Armin represent me in any social situation ever. Like what.

I'm sorry it's terrible.

But here are the ships I plan to delve into, just in case you're curious:

Jearmin, JeanMarco, Ereri, EreMika (lol just kidding), and possibly JeanxEren. (what's the ship name for that again?)

*sighs* if people reeeeeaaaalllllyyyy wanna see Eremika i might consider it. Maaaaaaybe. But I'm too much of a faggot for that shit. BOYS LOVE FOREVER

Oh Levi. I can't wait until I write you naked. *nosebleeds at the thought*

Also, I can't fucking wait for the AOT English dub premiere (i had more trouble spelling that than I probably should have) on Toonami tonight. EVEN THOUGH I FUCKING HATE EREN'S VOICE I KINDA LIKE ARMIN'S AND LOVE MARCO AND JEAN'S SO I'M PUMPED. YEEEE.

Anywhore, read and review please! Later, losers!

-TRG