Title: This Heart Of Mine

Author: Darley1101

Rating: M (contains adult themes, including but not limited to violence and sexual acts)

Characters: Regina/The Evil Queen, Robin Hood, Tinkerbell, Maid Marian, Snow, Emma, Elsa, with mention of others.

Pairings: Regina/Robin, Robin/Maid Marian, mention of Regina/Daniel with mention of others.

Premise: Villains don't get happy endings. For a moment, Regina thought she might. After all, she'd done some heroic things. Didn't that warrant more than a glimpse at what happiness could be? She would like to think so. A certain fairy knows so and isn't above repeating history to make sure her friend finds that happy ending.

Author's Note: The finale fucked with me, I won't lie. I am still beyond pissed off and I don't know of any better therapy than writing. If you're not a fan of Outlaw Queen, I suggest you utilize the exit button, because this is going to be Outlaw Queen, with some Snowing and Captain Swan mixed in.

Dedication: For Shaye, Jade, Maggie, Jacky, Jessica and all my other fan forum lovelies!

Chapter One

Pixie Dust Doesn't Lie

A lonely silence greeted Regina Mills as she stepped out of Granny's diner and into the chilly night air. The temperature seemed to have dropped twenty degrees or so during the ten minutes she'd been inside the busy cafe. Tugging her black cashmere coat closer to her trembling body, Regina stared in the direction she had originally come. She could almost see the ghosts of Robin, Roland, and she as they strolled down the walk, bursting with excitement over their second chance at love. There would be no second chance. Not now. At least not for Regina. Her chin dropped, a curtain of ink black hair shielding her face as a tear rolled down the soft curve of her cheek. She wanted to hate Robin, to replace the blossom of love that had started to bloom in her heart with a dark ball of rage. She couldn't. If it had been Daniel standing there, very much alive, she would have run to him without a second thought. She couldn't even work up a proper rage towards Emma. Hurt and betrayal, yes. Anger, not quite yet. Maybe not ever. Her heart seemed to be enjoying its transition into something softer and was resisting any thought she had towards revenge. Not that she could actually inflict revenge on Emma. The other woman was Henry's biological mother, and right now Henry was all Regina had. She wasn't going to do a thing to screw that up.

"Have they named him yet?"

Regina jerked her head up, startled by the intrusive question. Tinkerbell stood a few feet away, her large blue eyes brimming with curiosity. "Neal," Regina whispered, her throat thick with emotion. "They named him Neal."

"Oh. Isn't that a bit...well awkward?" Something crunched beneath Tinkerbell's boots as she walked closer. Snow, Regina realized in utter disbelief. A fine frosting of snow had covered the ground. Funny, she couldn't remember there being any sign of a freak snow on the news. "I would have thought they would have chosen something a bit more...princely. Like Charles. Prince Charles. Now that has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"

There was already a Prince Charles. He lived in some kingdom named England. Regina had seen little bits and pieces of news concerning him in the ridiculous magazines they insisted on having at the grocery store. Besides, naming the baby Neal had been a sweet gesture. A kind one. The sort Snow was known for. "They wanted to honor Henry's father," she answered, not really caring if Tinkerbell had wanted a response or not.

"I suppose your right." A visible shiver racked through Tinkerbell's slight body as she huddled in her red wool coat. "So, why are you out here while everyone else is inside celebrating? Don't tell me you're running again. Regina! You can't keep running from your destiny. You have to..."

Regina shook her head. She wasn't in the mood for one of Tinkerbell's lectures. They were usually more precious than Snow's and Regina couldn't handle precious at the moment. She could barely handle the simple conversation they had going. "I'm not running. Or maybe I am, but not for the reason you think." The bell on the diner chimed, signaling that someone was exiting. Please don't be Robin, Marian, and Roland. A quick glance proved that her silent plea had been a futile one. Grabbing Tinkerbell's arm, Regina pulled her friend into the alley way.

"Is that..." Tinkerbell's lips parted slightly as she stared at the familial scene before them. Regina nodded."She's supposed to be dead. She shouldn't be here. Why is she here?"

"Emma," was all Regina could say. Emma. Interfering Emma who just like her mother. No, Regina's heart raged. Emma wasn't like her mother. Snow had been a child, she hadn't known any better. Emma was an adult; one who had known she shouldn't screw with time. Yet, Emma had done just that. She'd altered her parents story and she'd altered Regina's all in one devastating swoop.

"I don't understand. You're not supposed to bring people back from the dead. It's against the rules." Arms flailing in every direction, Tinkerbell started pacing their small hiding spot. "What was she thinking? Doesn't she realize that if a person is supposed to die you can't change that. All you accomplish is more pain and grief for the people who loved the...what is it Henry calls those things that are half human, half dead person?"

"Zombies," murmured Regina. Marian wasn't a zombie though. She was very much alive. Emma had arrived at a point in time where she could save Marian from whatever calamity it was that killed her. With the luck Regina had been having she was probably to blame for Marian's original death. It wasn't impossible. There had been countless nameless people she'd executed. Not just for herself, but for Midas as well. For a man who could turn things into gold he had a weak stomach when it came to executions. Unless it involved him turning the person into gold and melting them down for monetary gain. He had seemed to rather enjoyed that.

"Right. Zombies. Strange word, that. Zombies."

"She isn't a zombie." Without pausing for a breath, Regina related the tale of Emma and Hook going back in time. Where Emma found Marian.

"Well, she's all about breaking the rules now, isn't she?" Tinkerbell shook her head. "Can't say I'm surprised." The fairy let out a sigh before catching Regina's gaze. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Regina lied, her voice almost choking on the words. She wasn't fine. Her heart felt ready to shatter into a million pieces. She couldn't even muster up a false sense of 'it would be.' She'd let her walls down. She'd opened herself up to the possibility of love again. Look where it had gotten her? Alone, nursing a broken heart while the man she loved found his happy ending with another woman. The woman he had loved all along. The woman he would walk through hell for.

"Don't lie, Regina. Not to me. You forget, I know you."

As much as Regina would like to dispute Tinkerbell's claim that the fairy knew her, it was the truth. If there was anyone who knew Regina better than Regina herself, it was the fairy standing in front of her. "I feel like I am dying inside, is that what you want to hear?"

"No. What I want to hear is that you're happy. That you're letting your goodness shine through."

Happiness. Regina had held it in the palm of her hand, relished the sweetness. It had been fleeting, yanked away as quickly as it had come. Leaving in its wake a sense of loss and longing. As for the supposed goodness Tinkerbell wanted to shine, Regina wasn't sure she had anymore left. "You know what you need? Hope. You need hope Regina. And I know exactly how to give it to you!" A bold, smug smile stretched across Tinkerbell's lips as she pulled out a vile of sparkling green pixie dust.

Regina's mouth opened, ready to tell Tinkerbell what she could do with her pixie dust. Before she could utter the words, Tinkerbell whispered something to the dust before sprinkling it over Regina. Much as it had the first time it shot off into the darkness, providing them with a trail. Heart pounding, Regina gripped Tinkerbell's hand and started to follow. Though her heart was broken, she was in dire need of hope. Perhaps the dust could provide her with a bit. Even if she wasn't ready to move on, knowing there was some one else she could be happy with, was the sort of hope she needed at the moment. Her footsteps faltered as the pixie dust settled around Robin's retreating form. She dropped Tinkerbell's hand and spun around, facing her. Her dark eyes blazed with un-shed tears and all the pent up anger she was trying not to feel. "Your dust is faulty. Robin isn't my soul mate. He isn't my chance for happiness or love or hope. He isn't my anything."

"Pixie dust doesn't lie, Regina," Tinkerbell said softly.

(edited July 17, 2014)