Title: Spider
Summary: Well, technically it's not a spider. But it is on the Bus, and Fitz is terrified of it, so Skye's going to come to the rescue.
Rating: T for mentions of violence
Word Count: 1180
Other Chapters: No.
Disclaimer: ABC owns Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and all related characters, settings, and trademarks. I do not in any way profit from the use of this material.
Pairings: Jemma Simmons/Skye.
Contains: femslash, season two setting
Warnings: arachnophobia

First Skye heard running. Then the door to Fitz's cubicle opened and closed, and there was a noise that Skye was fairly certain was Fitz collapsing onto his bed.

That sounded like something that was probably worth looking into. Skye closed her homework—a textbook full of S.H.I.E.L.D. protocols that May wanted her to memorize—and opened her door just on time to hear Jemma say "Fitz, it's just a harmless giupponia chagasi! It's not going to hurt you! One of us probably carried it in there without knowing!"

"No, it's not," Fitz shouted, refusing to open his door. "Because it can't get in here."

"What's going on?" Skye asked Jemma.

Jemma sighed and shook her head. "There's a harvestmen in the lab. Fitz is being unreasonable about it."

Skye laughed. "Come on, Fitz! It's just a spider! You've taken on HYDRA!"

"I was nearly killed by HYDRA," Fitz said. "And one near-death experience this year is quite enough, thank you."

"It's not deadly!" Jemma said. "It doesn't even want to hurt you!"

"Is there a problem?" Antoine said, appearing out of nowhere, as Operations agents are wont to do.

"Spider," Skye said.

"Well, technically it's not a spider," Jemma said. "Spiders are of the order Araneae. Harvestment are Opiliones."

Skye and Antoine were quiet.

"You can tell by the fusion off the cephalothorax to the abdomen, and the number of eyes. Also," she turned and yelled to Fitz's door, "Opiliones have no fangs or venom!"

"Have you counted it's eyes?" Fitz yelled back.

"How would I have counted it's eyes?" Jemma asked. "I'd need to catch it first!"

Antoine raised an eyebrow and gave a sideways glance to Skye.

Skye smirked.

"...So you all are afraid of the spider?" Antoine said.

Jemma let it go, that time.

"Fitz is afraid of the spider," Skye said. "Spiders used to crawl into my van all the time. They don't bother me."

Antoine shrugged. "Okay," he said. "So does Fitz want me to kill the spider?" He looked at Fitz's door and flashed a truly charming smile, thought Fitz couldn't see it. "You know," he said, slightly more loudly, "They don't let you into the Operations Academy unless you kill your own spiders—spiders, then humans—so I can take care of this pretty easily."

"Yes!" Fitz said.

"No!" Jemma immediately said. "It's giupponia chagasi! It's endangered. No one is killing it in my lab!" She huffed and looked at Antoine as if she absolutely would fight him over this.

He held up his hands in immediate surrender.

"It's my lab too!" Fitz said. "And I can't go back in there until it's dead or at least in a cage or something!"

Jemma suddenly looked thoughtful. "I'd actually love to have it in one of my cages," she said. "There aren't many left in the world, and it would be a great opportunity to study it."

Skye and Antoine looked at each other for a second.

"...Okay," Antoine said, though he already sounded exhausted by the whole thing. "So it's an extraction mission. I've done that before. No problem. I'll need the No-Touch-Container and a Hyper-Stick Suit."

"We don't have a Hyper-Stick Suit on the plane!" Fitz said.

"Oh, well then," Skye said. "That's it. The spider wins. We are all just the slaves of the spider now. All hail the spider..."

"It's not a spider," Jemma pointed out again. "If it was enslaving us and forcing us to worship it, I think it would want us to to get that right."

"You're right," Skye said. "I'll work on that before it has me executed. Or, someone could get me a glass, a piece of paper, and a chair."

Jemma nodded eagerly and headed off to the kitchen.

Skye looked at Antoine and smile. "Is that what it's like being a legacy? Does your family use S.H.I.E.L.D. gear to solve all of it's problems?"

Antoine smiled a little. "Howling Commandos gear isn't S.H.I.E.L.D. gear—"

"I hope you know that S.H.I.E.L.D. disagrees with you there!" Fitz yelled.

Antoine shrugged. "If you've got it, you take whatever excuse you get to use it."

"Makes sense," Skye said.

Jemma returned with a single glass. "There's paper and a chair in the lab already," she said, before bravely leading the way in the face of unstoppable danger that was a single Daddy Longlegs on the wall.

"Okay," Antoine said. "I got this."

"No," Skye said, smiling at him as Jemma handed Skye a sheet of paper and muttered something about 'these calculations are incorrect anyway', "I don't want to put you in danger by sending you in without all the equipment you'd need. I have what I asked for." Skye grabbed a chair and slid it up against the wall under the not-spider, then she got onto it, stood on her toes (okay, Antoine would have had an easier time with that. He was taller.) and placed the glass over the not-spider. She used the glass to force the not-spider down the wall a little bit, and then she slipped the sheet of paper under the not-spider to trap it, folded the paper up around the glass, and then lifted the whole set-up from the wall. Jemma, meanwhile, had dug a cage out of a cabinet somewhere, and was quickly cleaning it. "Put it in here, for now!" Jemma said. "When we stop next, I'll get it some stuff make it feel more at home..." As soon as she was finished cleaning it, Skye removed the paper and opened the glass into the cage, and encouraged the not-spider to go down into the cage with some gentle tapping.

Once it was in, Jemma pulled out a magnifying glass and looked it over for a minute. "Two eyes," she said. "And the right fusion of the body parts. We can tell Fitz that it's both in a cage and definitely not a spider!"

"And the day is saved," Antoine said, smiling. "It does my heart good to see such fine fieldwork from a rookie."

"Shut up," Skye said, laughing.

Jemma's hand slowly slipped into Skye's and intertwined their fingers. Antoine noticed immediately. "I'll go deliver the good news to Fitz," he said. Then he was gone.

Skye turned to Jemma, and Jemma squeezed Skye's hand and smiled. "He's right, you know," she said. "You saved the day."

"From danger that was never real in the first place," Skye said.

"Fitz didn't think so," Jemma pointed out. "Now, it wasn't an official S.H.I.E.L.D. mission, so you won't get a bonus or a medal or any official commendation, but I think maybe I can give you something..."

"What—" Skye started to say.

Then Jemma kissed her. It was their third kiss, and it affected Skye just as strongly as the first two had. Skye felt like she'd been stunned. For a moment, her world stopped and the only thing in it were Jemma's lips on Skye's. Jemma pulled away and smiled, and Skye's heart fluttered and her stomach flipped. Skye blushed and smiled back.

"I think that's better than a medal," she said.