End

You're saying we are now reaching the end...The real end of this story? Our story?

Akashi opened his eyes. He did. That gave him hope...That he was able to register opening his eyes, even though he was still too blinded to see anything at all. But it had to mean something, right? That he existed, in some way.

He didn't know how long it took, he was just laying? Floating? He didn't know what he was doing, his senses were numb. His mind was clear enough though...he could only imagine what was around him, if anything. It wasn't uncomfortable, as in a dream long ago, one he could reminiscence about. He just was. He could lull himself away. Let his consciousness drift apart, be broken one last time.

But did he want to?

Did he still have will in him? What had been the reason for him doing this?

He must remember.

There was someone...Someone who was so very truly dear to him, someone he couldn't stand to live without...But he couldn't remember who. Considering he didn't remember his own identity either, it was pretty impressive that he even remembered someone else's existence. That just proved to his currently clouded mind how important the other must've been.

Where...Where was he even?

He truly tried to see, but somehow it was just so light, he saw...he saw nothing but white. Was it light? Was it something else? He could remember of a place that was entirely white...Where was that place? When had he been there? And hadn't there been something else too there?

...Ah, that's right.

It had been him.

But where would such a place exist?

And the color...the color that had clearly been visible in the white sea of nothingness? Which color had it been...He couldn't remember.

Well, what could he even remember?

...Wait.

He had died, hadn't he? Was this what it was like after death...? He shivered, finding himself able to move. It would be a horrible kind of torture, just having to exist without being able to do anything. He had never really believed in any afterlife or such. Something had happened though, that had made him doubt all his beliefs and thoughts. What had that been now again?

...Of course...

That too was him

He got up, feeling weak, there was nothing to grip on to. He hated feeling weak.

...Still, he had made him feel so weak and helpless.

How come everything, every single bit of memory he could get back, connected to that person? It was extremely annoying, not being able to remember anything, and whenever he happened to it was suddenly about that person. Why would he even care that much about a person who made him weak? Keep your friends close but your enemies closer?

No, that's not it.

He must have genuinely cared for this person. Wrinkling his nose at the thought, he turned his head around, trying to see anything. But there was only white.

He won't show up and startle me from behind this time?

Of course he won't...why would he. He was dead, both of them were, there was no place for him to be happy. Still, he would have preferred it not feeling this miserable, and suffering of amnesia.

But then again, if he was going to be here forever, then it might be his only way to pass time. To try and remember...until he would, and then he would only be in grief, missing that one person, for whom he would have done near to anything.

He was sure he'd miss that person.

Have I ceased existing yet? I still don't know true death. Is this it? Will I truly never see him again?

I shouldn't have my conscience. I shouldn't have my thoughts.

It was all white, but what he was standing on was quite solid. Or was that just an illusion too? Maybe he was floating.

So, what now?

Is there anything I can do?

No.

There really was nothing but wait, and perhaps try to trigger some memories as well. But what was he waiting for? Was he waiting for the end of eternity? Or just for a simple dpt of color to appear?

Blue...It was a light blue, powder-blue color.

Ah, was he smiling now. He might be. His senses were still slightly dull after...after what? Truth is the only things he knew, were that he had killed himself. And that there was a person whom he deeply loved and longed for. Also - he had killed himself for the sake of that person. Because that other person too was dead. He had no idea of the circumstances in which all this had happened, in which he would abandon all rationality and try to follow someone to a place where no one should go of their own free will.

How can I have been so stupid?

The answer to that lay in his memories, that were unraveling inside his head as he spoke. For he was speaking his thoughts out loud into the white nothingness.

What am I supposed to do?

Kuroko opened his eyes. He did. Around him everything was white. He knew where he was, but he had not expected it this time. He had expected to never open his eyes again. But now he was there again, in the same world, the same white space. Still, something was missing, and now he knew what that something was.

Seijuro...

Kuroko's mind was as clear as it could be, he was alert and aware. He was aware of the lack of presence of any other being in the white world. That also meant no Akashi, whom he had always been able to sense. He closed his eyes slowly, the whiteness disappearing into black. He tried to concentrate, to gather every piece of knowledge he had, to find out how it would have come to this. He shouldn't be here? This world had ceased existing to him a long time ago, unless Akashi was there. By the time he had gone, Akashi had already been his world. So how was he here now, when it seemed that Akashi was not?

Had Akashi come here? In that case how, and why? Had he died? A how long time had passed since their last meeting...? His perception of time was very different from others now, other humans in the very least. His consciousness was there sometimes, other times not.

He hadn't even dared ask himself or anyone else the question of how such happiness had been bestowed upon him, even for such a short while. How it came that he had been able to meet Akashi, and spend years with him in this world that was just like a dream. /It was a dream/ That he had experienced so much after his one chance at life had been lost. He knew he should be grateful, but he hadn't even thought about it, in fear of questioning any of it would take it away from him. He didn't want that. He didn't want to lose Akashi, his world, his literal reason for existance.

I wonder where Akashi is now. I wonder if he is still able to think, if he is thinking about me?

Akashi, was very much thinking about Kuroko, even though his face was something he couldn't completely recall. Well, an understatement, he only remembered the hair color. And that he was short, shorter than Akashi at least. It wasn't enough, he wanted to know, he wanted to find out, he needed information... But in the end, he was still unable to help the situation.

He didn't even know his own name.

He had discovered that there was no way he was dead. Or rather, there was no way he was dead as how other people were. Or maybe others had their own private little worlds in their dreams where they went after they passed away in 'reality' but it was for sure that he was the only one here.

But wasn't this place always one for the both of us? Is it anything worth if he is not here?

Not really no.

Would he have to devote his time to grieve over someone he barely remembered being there, eternally searching for something impossible to find? No, he might grieve, but even if the person in question was not one he had a clear image of, the feelings were still there as strong as ever. And could he live with that kind of pain weighing him down? ...It might be wrong to say that he lived though.

Can't he just be here? That man, the one with the distinct hair color, the one that made him who he was, and brightened his day. Or was this still some kind of twisted punishment from the same 'fate' that dared mock him for not believeing its existence? Must be, for otherwise why would something like this be happening?

Or could it be that it just was, that no one had cared enought to even change it, to affect it, just let it be, let it develop to the miserable scenario it had become. More likely, it wasn't like his own little life mattered in an actual world full of people. He wasn't special. It was once again something that person had taught him. He was both sad and grateful for learning. He felt much more alone. But with that person beside him, he hadn't felt alone at all. Now he wasn't here.

What am I supposed to do.../haven't I thought this too many times already/

Of course he missed Akashi. That was probably the most obvious thing. But there was really nothing he could do, nothing he knew would work. So he tried to think logically about the whole situation. According to his own knowledge (based on experience), he shouldn't be here. He shouldn't exist. That he had known for a long time, and he had felt guilty and blamed himself for getting one chance more than others, but now even more so. If Akashi wasn't here, there was no reason for him to be there, Akashi was what had bound him here from the beginning. He was the only thing that had bound him there. That must mean Akashi still existed, right? He wouldn't-He couldn't be gone, right?

Yeah, no.

I can only wish, and hope that he'll come to me.

He sat down and buried his head in his hands. He was crying now...the tears flowed quite steadily, he wasn't sobbing or anything. Neither was there a specific reason for this, he was just overwhelmed by loneliness and hopelessness. /Despair/ That way he stayed for a long - how long, he didn't know - time, until the tears had run out and he looked up. His expression was blank, he felt empty, and when he made a noise into the whiteness, it was faint.

There was no echo in this place. How had he never noticed before? Oh, it hadn't been this empty, had it? He sighed, and started walking. He aimlessly continued in the direction he decided was forward. He could have just walked around in circles for many hours, there was no way to know, but at least it felt like he was doing something. He cntinued moving and wasn't numbed, he didn't give up just yet, surrender to his 'fate'.

It felt like an eternity, probably was too, before he reached his goal. Because apparently he had had one.

It's red.

"AKASHI!"

Akashi wanted to keep moving, because 'not doing anything' wasn't his style. And the only thing he could do here was move. He tried to remember some melody, some song to sing, but he couldn't focus enough, regretted being too focused in life, to have the time to listen to much catchy music. Anything would have been better than the unending, pressuring silence that surrounded him. He tried to remember what rhythm was, so he could dance, but in his reality he had never had the time to spare to learn more than obligatory. He tried to conjure up a story in his head, but all that filled it was depression. Had he ever done anything actually FUN in his time alive? Yeah...There was basketball. But he couldn't really do that, without a ball.

But wasn't there a way to get one? Hadn't the one with the unwavering blank stare said that to him? Couldn't he recall one of their first conversations, one where he had still looked down upon his to-become-love?

"Then we should make this world ours"

"And what eactly do you mean by that,_ _ _?"

"This world is something you make, by wishing, and creating inside your head. I mean, if we're going to be stuck here together, we might as well make it a bit more comfortable"

"Oh"

"But now that I think about it, isn't there something you want to exist here,_ _?"

"How?"

"Imagine it"

...

"You're still here"

"You just want me to not be here?"

"Yes"

"That's pretty insulting you know?"

"You don't look insulted _ _ _"

"I never do,_ _ _-kun, doesn't mean I'm not"

"Are you then?"

"Of course"

Akashi was quietly laughing at the memories that had welled up in his head. He found it ironic that his first wish here had been for that person to go away, when now his deepest desire was the exact opposite. And now, no matter how much he wished for him to be here, nothing would happen, the same way as he hadn't disappeared back then. The latter he was grateful for. But he wanted to meet him, see him, feel him again...where could he possibly be?

He was dead wasn't he? He was dead long before you, it was all just a dream

No. It was real. He might have been dead, but it was still him who was there with me all that time. Finding out that he hadn't existed elsewhere, that doesn't change the fact that I loved him. Still love him.

He lay down. Closed his eyes, let himself drift away...Then he heard a voice. It was distant, as if he was already dreaming /he had never slept here before, always, he had woken up in his own room, he didn't know if dreams existed in this place without life/

"AKASHI!"

The voice shouted a familiar name, even if the shout was more of a whisper to his ears. That name...Who was it now again? Akashi? Was that-Was that him? Was Akashi his own name? It did ring a bell. Akashi Seijuro. That's right.

My name is Akashi Seijuro

After getting through that, his mind managed to process that there was someone behind that voice, someone had yelled for him, and who else could that person be than- Quicker than you could believe he was up and wide awake, eyes opened so that red veins showed at the corners gaze directed towards the approaching person. The person was running. He was now standing right before Akashi. He couldn't form a single word. His mind was blank and he would have opened his mouth, no matter how unprofessional, if he was in a position to move it.

Finally he managed to say something to the man in front of him - boy would be more accurate, he was stuck at how he hadlooked as a 15 yearold - who was out of breath, gasping and gulping, who was in tears, and was staring him right into the eyes.

"Who-Who are you?"

At first Kuroko didn't understand what Akashi said. He had finally found him? What was he saying now, Kuroko couldn't comprehend. Then, he broke down. Fell to his knees - weak enough from all the walking and running already, buried his head into his arms, and started hyperventilating. He wasn't crying, he didn't have it in him anymore, he wasn't sobbing, he was too shocked. He was just trying to cope, to realize. That Akashi was back. But he didn't remember him.

What was the point with any of this anyway?

He managed to catch his breath a few times. He still didn't look up, but he calmed down, braced himself for what probably was to come. Then he felt a hand awkwardly on his head. He knew exactly whose hand it was, he recognized the size, the warmth of it. It was Akashis hand, and the mere contact with it filled Kuroko with a warm feeling. The hand moved in patterns, what they were didn't really matter, kind of ruffling Kuroko's hair.

It's soft.

Akashi thought as he ran his fingers through Kuroko's hair. He had done this before.

...Didn't that mean that this person currently at his feet, completely silent except for a quiet breath, was the one he missed, the one he remembered? That 'who are you' was supposed to be a 'what is your name'. Akashi still hadn't remembered the name of his beloved.

"I'm sorry-"

The other person suddenly stood up, grabbing Akashi's hand as he did so. "No, I'm sorry for suddenly coming running like that, it's completely understandable that you don't remember me, I am entirely at fault for bringing you into this in the first place" he said with a monotonous voice, with a falsely blank expression "Would you excuse me" he turned around, letting go of the hand and started walking away. What Akashi couldn't possibly see was the horror in his eyes. He was ready to throw up any minute.

"Wait" In a very clichéd and somehow from him unexpected way, Akashi grabbed Kuroko's wrist, to stop him from leaving.

Kuroko did stop, swallowing down everything that could possibly be coming out. "Why?"

"Because I do remember you. May I inquire what you name might be though? The only memories I have are of you, but what I should call you is one thing I have yet to recall"

"That doesn't make any sense /Sei-kun/ Akashi-kun" Kuroko had almost smiled there. A wave of relief flushed upon him, but it was too early to lose the tension yet.

"...Might not. But you understand right?"

"...Yeah"

"So, your name?"

Kuroko sighed and looked back at Akashi, finally one might add. "I think it's better if you try to remember that yourself one day"

"...Fine" He was right. It was better that way.

I will wait to say 'I love you'

What they did then, was to rebuild the world, for with the memories and knowledge Kuroko had, it wasn't much of a problem. Before, the only thing he had lacked was will. Now he had it, his goal was to make Akashi remember everything. About him, about himself, everything. He wasn't in too much of a hurry, he wanted Akashi to remember it all by himself. Until then he would wait to utter those three words he so longed to be able to say.

How long it took didn't matter. They had fun, Kuroko was unknown to Akashi recreating many scenarios they had experienced in the past, trying to awaken the sleeping memories. Every once in a while he would ask how much Akashi remembered. The more he said he did, the more open Kuroko became, the more he started seeking the same physical and mental contact that had, before the truth was revealed, been an everyday thing.

One day, one time - there wasn't exactly any way to count time there - Akashi came to him. He had a fierce look in his eyes at first. He looked Kuroko in the eyes, gaze softening. Kuroko didn't move, he just stared back. Akashi leaned in and kissed him, it was their first kiss since the troubles had come. It wasn't anything too long, but it was passionate and loving enough, for many of those they had missed. When they broke away, instead of taking his head backwards, further away from Kuroko, he leaned even more in, over Kuroko's shoulder. He whispered something. Kuroko cried tears of happiness and embraced him.

"Tetsuya"

You're saying we are now reaching the end...The real end of this story? Our story?

No, I'm saying that now it will truly begin. It's only the two of us, now and forevermore.

Yes, I'm a sucker for ultimately corny endings, please don't judge me. Okay so I'm sorry for once again making you all wait T_T But I just don't know...somehow no inspiration or anything. Also, i read this story through once to remember and whoa i have never written anything this good earlier (like it's not that good, but good compared to earlier things...you wouldnt want to see those)

Also, a song title that goes well with this chapter "one of repetition" (get it get it? I repeated myself so much?) there's a quite sad akakuro video for that on youtube, go watch it if you want to :)

And also If i have forgotten to mention I do in no way encourage suicide! If you really feel like killing yourself...feel free to talk to me. There's not much I can do but. Talk to anyone? Okay wat am I saying, I just wanted to make my point.

I would Like to thank you all for your support, and I wish that you would review just this last chapter still? I hope you can forgive me for its lateness.

And also, do you think I should write more for this pairing? (I probably will uwu especially with the manga sequel and 3rd season and whatnot) but any ideas? Requests (lol okay no one wants me to write requests yet. Except for me haha)

Soo. One more review? If you please? Constructive critisizm?