DEMON RESOURCES

WOW: solution. No-one ever said being the Prince of Darkness was easy.

A/N If this sounds like a Human Resources practitioner doing a bit of venting - it is - hence the fact I've done 200 words; I need to do a lot of venting!

Disclaimer: I don't own him - I don't know which of us is more relieved about that!

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It's hard work being the Lord of Hell.

Sure, it has its perks, but people don't think about the practical side of things; the long hours, the pressure, writing all those interminable performance reviews for Hell's minions and all the crap that goes with that - the training, the support, the disembowelling - sometimes it's enough to make a grown embodiment-of-all-evil weep.

Then there was that clown yesterday who wanted to improve equality and diversity in Hell; you know, equal opportunities in torture and mutilation - that kind of thing.

I found a solution; I sliced him into a thousand equal pieces and spread them in diverse places around the pit.

Sometimes they come to me moaning about their lot; 'the terms and conditions stink' they say.

Hello? Sulphur …

They complain about the hours, the health and safety, the food … I mean, what the hell (literally) is wrong with the food? The meat screams while you're eating it, how goddamn fresh can you get?

But anyway, if they complain too much, I normally have a nice civilised meeting to hear their grievance, then I suspend them. Usually by the thumbs.

*sigh*

Did I mention it's hard work being the Lord of Hell?

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