A/N: Yeah I know, it's been a while since I last uploaded something. But you all know how it is - RL and all that.
This story here is kind of a song fic - I used the lyrics of a song from Beth Jo (I'm going to tell you about her at the end of the chapter) in this fic because every time I was listening to that song I had this in my head. So, here ya go.
Beta'd by the great thekezzasaurus !

It's been nearly two month since Castiel fell and one and a half month since Cas started living in the bunker with Dean, Sam and Kevin. And even though Cas had had a rough start – with the whole half starving to death before Dean found him and everything – he's still kind of happy.

The only thing that Cas still had troubles with was coping with his emotions. He never had to deal with them and even though he observed humanity for a long time – millennia even! – he still had problems with reading people's emotions.

So Sam suggested that he started listening to music and use music as a way to learn and express how he feels. So he started to listen to music, day in, day out and after some time he even found songs he really liked. And as the weeks passed Cas found himself singing along to the songs he now had on his iPod – which Sam had bought him and he still was unbelievable thankful for – and the desire to be able to play an instrument so he was able to really sing the songs got stronger and stronger the more his love for music grew.

It took quite some nagging and even some begging but after a while Dean gave in to Cas and bought him an acoustic guitar. That was the day that Cas life changed drastically – again.

As soon as he had the guitar between his fingers he borrowed Sam's laptop and locked himself in his room. He couldn't have been happier when he was able to play his first full song, "Hey Jude" by the Beatles. (And it took Cas only two weeks to learn it and he was really proud of himself for that.)

He especially learned that song because he knew that song meant a lot to Dean and when he was confident enough to play in front of other people he wanted to ask Sam if he was good enough to show it to Dean.

Tentatively knocking on Sam's door he waited for the younger Winchester's voice before poking his head inside the room.

"Sam? May I ask for your opinion on something?", he asked with a small but steady voice.

"Sure, come on in. What do you want my opinion on?", Sam answered with a smile and turned around in his chair to fully look at Cas.

Castiel made himself comfortable on Sam's bed, sitting cross-legged on top of the duvet with his precious guitar in his lap.

"I-", he hesitated a for a few moments, "Would you listen to me playing a song?"

After seeing the younger man nod he focused on his guitar and started to play the song.

At the beginning he barely sang at all, but as the song went on he grew more and more confident and by the end of the song he even smiled while singing.

Looking up at Sam he instantly noticed that he was wide-eyed and his mouth was agape. Suddenly all his confident was gone and he started to fumble with his shirt sleeve. "Was it that bad?" he asked nervously.

It took Sam a few seconds to understand what Cas said. "DUDE! What was amazing! Your voice is really great, it's kinda gravely but smooth at the same time." Sam exclaimed excitedly.

Nothing in the world could have stopped the huge smile that spread across Cas' face.

After that Cas spent nearly every waking hour in his room learning new songs and even tentatively trying to write his own. He found that if he had a nightmare or if something happened that bothered him he always felt happier after playing his guitar or writing a song about how he felt, despite still having trouble putting everything into words.

After nearly four months of being able to play the guitar Cas nearly only played his own songs, but only when he was sure that all the other occupants of the bunker where either out or sound asleep.

Although Castiel was really confident with playing someone else's songs in front of the others, he was very self-conscious about his own songs. He always made sure that no-one could hear him play the ones he'd written himself.

And one afternoon while Kevin was taking a nap and the brothers were out shopping Cas took out his secret notebook and opened it to his newest song. Skimming over it he smiled to himself, satisfied that he was nearly finished with his – as far as his opinion went – best song so far.

It was one of the many songs he wrote for Dean, but it was the very first he poured all his heart into. He was so excited to finish that song in particular that he even forgot to close his door.

When Dean came home from their groceries shopping he was alone, Sam taking off to go to the local library ("Really Sam? Don't you have enough books at the bunker library?" - "Yes Dean, but I'll still go to the local library.") he took all the groceries into the kitchen.

He was about to put them all in their respective cupboards when he heard an unfamiliar song. Noticing that it was played on an acoustic guitar Dean was sure that it must have been Cas playing. Very slowly and nearly noiselessly he sneaked up to Castiel's room and saw that his door was wide open.

Smiling to himself he leaned against the wall next to the door and listened. Cas played a slow and gentle song, humming it to himself a few times. In between the playing and humming he stopped for a few seconds and the sound of pen on paper was heard.

After a few minutes Dean heard Cas say "This will do".

Unaware that he had closed his eyes he opened them again and looked at the door curiously. Straining his ears he tried to listen as closely as possible and waited for Cas to sing his song.

He didn't have to wait long and Cas' rough but somehow still smooth voice was heard singing the first few lines of his own song.

"No matter what I said
No matter where I go
I can't change the grace inside me"

His jaw dropped and his eyes widened comically. 'I never realized what a nice voice Cas has' he thought to himself.

"You told me not to change
Despite my lack of faith
You can break the chains that bind me"

That caught Dean off guard. Was Cas singing about him? Surely Dean only imagined that.

"I know you think your hope

has died beneath your bones
I can see the light that guides me"

Dean slid down the wall and sat still leaning against it. He stretched his legs out and closed his eyes again. Even if the song wasn't about him he sure as hell was going to enjoy it.

"I know you think your hope

has died beneath your bones
I can see the light that guides me"

He heard a door close in the distance and looked into the direction. It came from around the corner so he thought that Kevin might have woken up from his nap.

Cas seemed to have heard the door too because he stopped playing. Not wanting to be caught eavesdropping Dean held his breath.

A few seconds later another door opened and closed and soon after that Cas resumed playing and Dean let out the breath he was holding.

"You know we haven't won
You might think I was wrong
But everything I've done
I'm not sorry"

Cas stopped again and cleared his throat a few times. 'Damn Cas and his love for air conditioning. I bet he caught the flu or something.' Dean thought worriedly but as soon as Cas started again all other thoughts but 'listen listen listen' where gone.

"It doesn't matter whether you think you deserve to be saved
It'll happen anyway"

By then Dean didn't even try to make himself believe that the song was about something – ore someone – else but him. He couldn't even begin to fathom what he did to deserve such a beautiful song, but he was still going to love it nonetheless.

" 'Cause no matter what I say
No matter where I go
I can't change the grace inside me

You told me not to change
Despite my lack of faith
You can break the chains that bind me

I know you think your hope

has died beneath your bones
But I can see the light that guides me

I know we haven't won
You might think I was wrong
But everything I've done
I'm not sorry"

As Cas came to an end with the song Dean slowly got up from the floor and crept back into the kitchen. He started to put everything away and after a few minutes he called out "Cas! I'm back from the grocery run!"

It didn't take long until Dean heard a – fond sounding? - "Hello Dean" behind himself.

Turning around with his most charming smile Dean said "Guess what Cas? I'm gonna cook burgers for dinner!"

"Awesome!" Cas exclaimed happily.

That evening when Dean went to bed he had a hard time falling asleep.

He couldn't stop thinking about Cas song and whether or not to tell Cas he heard his song. He was really curious and wanted to know if the song really is about him.

He also wanted to hear Cas' singing voice again.

With the merest hint of hope that his feelings for Cas could be returned he managed to fall asleep with a small smile on his lips.

A/N: So, Beth Jo.
You should really listen to her music! Her songs are unbelievable beautiful, her voice is amazing and dreamlike and she's a nice girl and gave me the permission to use her lyrics for my fic :D
You can find her on soundcloud: xbethjo and the song is called 'Destiel' and you can also find it on soundcloud.

As always I appreciate reviews and love everyone that leaves me one ;D