Marvel owns the X-men and the Guardians of the Galaxy, no profit is to be made from this work.

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"Bad raccoon! Put down the...really big fricking gun..."

First of all, he knew it had to be a kid. They were pretty much universal in how they looked, cute but kinda annoying all the same. Too old to need their diaper changed even if they still whined like they had just shit their pants. The problem was this kid had Groot, his Groot, and like only he knew...I am Groot also meant Friend.

"Make me." Rocket urged, flicking off the safety figuring that if the kid knew anything about guns then she'd know he was serious.

Well, as far as Rocket figured out, that just might have been Human for 'Kick me in the twig and cherries please', because she sure as hell tried. One second she was pointing a chastising finger at him, the next...pop. They weren't the pretty lights Groot could do, no, these ones hurt. Wondering just which half of the Starlord himself was Human could wait because currently he had some whiskers to put out.

"Eee...shit! I just set a raccoon on fire! Fire extinguisher, fire extinguisher, where's the...oh!"

Apparently the kid wasn't so far removed from whatever evolutionary tree Pete fell out of as not to go and do something completely reckless and stupid, which was to put out him...the one and only Rocket, and just maybe he was a raccoon in some distant ancestry. As far as fire suppression went she might just as well have thrown a bucket of water at him. The problem was she hadn't, so he was currently all kinds of pissed off and covered in foam, which...actually gave him an idea.

Terra was about as loose as a hacked protocol droid, but they had this thing called Wikipedia which was helpful with understanding Starlord. Actually the Youtube thing helped a lot more when it came to understanding Pete...but as for Humans in general Wikipedia was pretty solid.

"I got Rabies!"

Kid froze, stopped, and jerked back like he'd just bit her. If he was a raccoon, not that he was saying he was, but just...if...then maybe it wasn't as bad as some folks made it sound like. Everything he'd read up on them painted them as smart, devious little bastards. Completely opportunistic and they seemed like something you pissed off at your own peril. All his best qualities in a nutshell.

That wasn't to say Humans weren't kind of weird when it came to the signals they gave off, she was red in face and looked like he had just tried to get fresh with her. So far as he could figure, that meant she was either on her way to becoming an adult or...

"Paf!"

...turning out to be a cute and cuddly version of Drax with all the pain and half the literalism. Paf didn't translate, but he kinda figured it meant 'you bad/you go away/you hurt now'.

"What the hell is wrong with you!?" Rocket yelled, snatching at her comically simple fire suppression device to put out the fresh flames that danced across his fur.

Apparently Humans came with an off switch, because the kid's eyes rolled back in her head and she was out cold. Smacking paw to face, any chances of interrogating her to find out where Groot was would have to wait until she woke up. Scratching his ear and looking around the docking bay or whatever the hell it was, he figured he'd start without her when a twitch and flick of his ear had him hearing something familiar, music.

"Ooga Chaka, Ooga Ooga, Ooga Chaka, Ooga Ooga..."

Grinning full of fangs, he knew that music just as sure as Groot did. The only problem was Groot liked kids, so that pretty much meant he'd like this kid. Looking down at her slumped form, she was kind of cute now that she wasn't trying to set him on fire.

"Where's Drax when I need him haul something heavy?"

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Twenty Four Hours Earlier...

"Hey! I'm walking here!"

Kicking the bumper of the car, Rocket dared the Human to even think about accelerating, smirking as the driver instead decided to back down after making all that noise what with the screeching and the awful honking. Planet of Outlaws his furry ass.

"I still can't tell if I love this rock or hate it."

Usually Groot would have had something insightful to say right about then. Even his smiling face conveyed almost as much as everything he had so beautifully articulated throughout their friendship. The only problem was that Groot was missing...and he felt more alone than ever.

"Ain't no thing like me, except me..."

Or Groot. Groot was one of a kind just like him, and no one had ever seen another like them so they got writ off as something less than they were. Then Starlord came along and called him a raccoon. It didn't translate, no one else in the galaxy he'd met had heard of a raccoon, no one except Peter Quill. So, being the proud being he was, he went to find out just what the hell a raccoon was.

Whatever the lady at the flower shop had written on the piece of paper matched up with the sign for the shop, and one constant throughout the galaxy was proven as he looked at it. Tourist traps all looked the same. Except this tourist trap had Groot, or at least the lady had sold Groot to the guy that ran it. Having once been in the bounty hunting business, maybe the trading of beings for cold hard currency wasn't exactly something he was squeamish about, except when the being in question was Groot.

"All this because I figured he could use a new pot because the old one was looking kinda small..." Rocket muttered, his moment of consideration for his friend the gift that just kept giving.

The door was open just like the sign advertised. Flipping it over, the shop was officially closed for business until he was done and any Human who couldn't read would be in for a nasty surprise.

"How can I help...oh, it's just a raccoon. At least it's not a rat this time. Shoo, get!"

Grinning up at the Human, he gave the man a minute to realize he wasn't just some raccoon. Everywhere he went on this rock people either ignored him or couldn't stop gawking.

"Where's Groot?"

"Did a raccoon just...?"

"Oh yeah, I just talked."

It was a good day to be armed for a breakout because the way he saw it, this rock was his and all the Humans were just living on it.

"Just tell me what's a Groot and I'll tell you if I've seen a Groot!"

"Well, he's kind of like one of those, except he's Groot."

It was a shitty imitation made out of some cheap polymer crap called plastic, but it was a potted plant that merrily bobbed about, simple enough that even the primitive could understand. Sure enough the man's eyes lit up, eagerly crawling to him to beg for his life.

"I sold one! Hours ago I sold a Groot! I'm sorry! But, but, but I can pull some video from the DVR so you can see who I sold it to!"

"Show me."

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Thirty Minutes Earlier...

Sticky could dance, Jubilee saw him dance back at the store. He looked kind of sad and lonely when she first saw him sitting there in his little flower pot along with some bouquets of roses that looked just as wilted and weary as he did. Then he started dancing and she was sold. She spent all her allowance and everything she had made from extra chores on Sticky, and now Sticky was sad again and wouldn't dance.

"Thirsty?" Jubilee asked, watering his little pot with some Evian she had snagged from the fridge.

He looked a little less wilted but no less sad. Thinking back to the what had been going on when he had danced so merrily, music had been playing but she couldn't remember what. It was just something in the background as she browsed around the neat little shop in NYC.

Rolling out of her bed and running over to her desk, she snagged her tablet and loaded up her 8tracks app for some music. Ten minutes into one of her favourite playlists still had Sticky looking sad. Shuffling through her eclectic tastes for another ten minutes had her getting bored and feeling a bit gloomy.

The house was too quiet, Jean and Scott were off on a date and she was definitely old enough that she didn't need a babysitter (even if Scott had tried to haggled with Jean to hire one just to keep her out of trouble). It was way too quiet without Logan around. Looking to his battered old cowboy hat he'd left behind for her along with his letter, she took it as a keepsake and a promise that he'd be back for it. She was just keeping it safe, it was his favourite hat after all, so of course he'd come back for it...

"Country?" Jubilee asked of Sticky, looking for something suitably depressing for the both of them.

One song in and now Sticky was looking extra sad and somehow she thought it was all for her. Offering him a lopsided smile as she looked into his concerned little eyes, she leaned in and gave him a little kiss to the cheek.

"Who's awesome? You're awesome. So lets find you something awesome to listen to."

Typing up that word alone, Awesome Mix Vol. 1 was the first hit and looked promising. Queueing up and suffering through an ad, a distant bang in the otherwise empty house had her on her feet and listening at her door.

"You stay here Sticky, I'm gonna check it out..."

Jean and Scott were nice people, way nicer than any other foster family she'd ever had. Maybe that was why Logan had left her with them, of course that wasn't to say she wasn't going to give him all kind of shit when he finally came back for his hat.

"Jean?"

Jean and Scott were also like her and Logan, they could do stuff ordinary humans couldn't. They were mutants, and since Jean was a telepath that meant it probably wasn't her who had made that loud bang, mostly because Jean would have already told her to go back to bed like all the times she'd been up for a midnight snack of the ice cream variety.

"Scott?"

Balling her fists, she walked through the empty house that felt a bit less welcoming than it had for the past few months. It was a nice brownstone in an affluent neighbourhood in Manhattan, the Summers just as affluent what with Jean being a Doctor and Scott a pilot. Pausing at the door to the garage, something stunk. Opening it a crack, she saw a face that usually she thought was cute but not so much tonight , a raccoon.

Except this one had somehow gotten into the Summer's garage where Scott kept the first love of his life, or so Jean teased Scott about his Harley. The very same Harley she'd just detailed yesterday to make some money that she had just spent on Sticky. Jubilee wasn't about to let some raccoon go getting it dirty with his grubby little paws.

"Drop the refuse and put your hands where I can see them!"

Starting strong after kicking open the door hoping to scare off the furry little intruder, something about this raccoon stuck out. He looked way too smug standing there thinking he was people, he looked as if he was waiting for her put together a punch line except that he'd be the one laughing. Pointing a scolding finger at him, she was a little less sure of herself as she tried again, because there was no way this raccoon was armed, that was crazy talk even from a mutant like herself.

"Bad raccoon! Put down the...really big fricking gun..."

"Make me."

Everything after that moment was Paf, panic, and fire. All up until the walking talking and heavily armed raccoon took the fire extinguisher away and proved she wasn't dreaming. The darkness behind her eyes wasn't so bad after that, and with how quiet everything was she heard some music playing, her last conscious thought a simple one, hoping that Sticky liked it.

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