The Sannin's Apprentice

Chapter 1

The Sannin were legends. The true terror of facing the Sannin wasn't so much that they were S-Ranked ninja, the world had plenty of those. No, the respect they commanded came more from the fact that they were a team of S-Ranked ninja, something unheard of in the ninja world. It was rare for the entire team to be deployed on a mission, but that was mostly because only one was ever really needed to deter wars and assassins.

Which made the fact that Jiraiya, Orochimaru, and Tsunade were all on the same protection detail all the more odd. It made sense that the successor of the Land of Fire's throne would require the best protection, and there was no doubt that the Sannin were the best, but the prince also had his own bodyguards, body doubles to do the public appearances, and the best spies in the country keeping an ear to the ground for any assassination attempts.

"I can't believe this brat's coming of age ceremony has pulled me away from my research." complained Orochimaru in an attempt to fill the silence with some form of noise, even if it meant talking to Jiraiya.

"Aw, buck up!" exclaimed the long haired toad summoner. "It could always be worse. The client could be an insufferable ass about all this. As it is, he's only a sufferable ass!"

The prince himself smiled into his sleeve subtly at Jiraiya's banter, but the one samurai charged with guarding him half drew his katana on the Sannin in barely contained anger. "How dare you talk about His Excellency like that! Perhaps I should cut your pride down to size. How does a head shorter sound?"

"Now, now, Tsurugi." said the prince, holding a hand up placatingly. "To be honest, it's rather refreshing to have such blunt language around me. I know you're just tense because you care, but please calm yourself. There's been absolutely no reason to suspect there will be any foul play today during the parade, and even if there is, I have you and three of the best ninja the Hidden Leaf has to offer to protect me."

The hot blooded samurai slowly sheathed his sword, glaring at Jiraiya, who grinned back sheepishly. "Of course, Your Majesty. I only fear for your safety in the hands of these ninja." The Sannin resumed their watch while Tsurugi turned the opposite direction. Between the four of them, every direction was covered. Except for within.

A glazed look fell over Tsurugi's eyes, and he placed his hand on the hilt of his sword, a gesture dismissed by the others as precaution and nerves. A combination of speed and the shock of the others allowed him to unsheathe the blade with a quickness that made samurai viable warriors in the time of ninja and slash the prince across the back. The monarch-to-be fell to the ground, equal parts confused and betrayed.

"The hell?" shouted Jiraiya as he stopped the blade from running him through, and slammed a swirling ball of pure blue energy into the samurai's armored stomach. The iron protection did little to stop the Rasengan, and Tsurugi was sent spinning through the wall, dead before he hit the ground. Tsunade moved quickly once the crisis was brought up, healing the wound on the prince's back. The bleeding cut slowly began to stitch itself closed under the master medic's guiding hand, but then Tsunade noticed the purple lines spreading out from the closing wound.

"Damn it, poison!" cursed the blonde Sannin as she quickly tried to diagnose the poison and administer the antidote. By the time the outer security arrived, the chaos had died down, the only evidence of the betrayal was a broken wall, and a crater punched into the floor by a frustrated medic after failing to save a patient.

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"Report." said the Third Hokage, his face and voice betraying no emotion save for the bit of annoyance at his pupils.

"The traitor infiltrated the client's guard over long years of loyal service. There was never any reason to suspect duplicity. During the mission, he drew his sword and struck the client, using the element of surprise and trust to land the blow. I dispatched him before any more damage could be done." said Jiraiya, wearing a grim visage as he stared straight ahead and stood ramrod straight.

"I began to administer first-aid to the patient, and successfully healed the wound. However, the blade had been poisoned beforehand, and the complexity of the toxin defied a quick remedy. Perhaps with the proper ingredients and a few days to analyze the poison, I could have created an antidote, but not on the spot like that." continued Tsunade, picking up where Jiraiya left off seamlessly.

Orochimaru finished the mission report with his own findings. "During my dissection, I came across evidence of previous tampering. Jiraiya examined the seal found inside the subject's cranium, and managed to identify it as a memory altering seal of unknown origin. Coupled with the poison that far exceeds masterful in its concoction, and we have reason to believe that the rogue samurai was merely a pawn being used by the true assassin."

"And this true assassin would be…?" asked the Third Hokage, his curiosity aroused. If there was one thing The Professor loved, it was a good mystery, and it was the silver lining to a very dark cloud.

"We have no real name or face at the moment, but the skill with both seals and poisons suggests someone who works extensively in both fields. I suspect a puppet user is responsible, though a rogue one, as the Hidden Sand wouldn't risk war by ordering such an assassination." theorized Orochimaru. The profile made sense, as the only other option would be a highly specialized support ninja with absolutely no combat skill. Most support ninja didn't live long enough to reach such a level of mastery without applying their knowledge in more conventional defenses. The only profession that used seals and poisons extensively and effectively were puppeteers.

The Third Hokage dropped his stern façade with a heavy sigh. "I'm not blaming you for what happened on the mission, it could have and would have happened to anyone. I'm just worried about the image this presents to the other villages. I'm afraid all they'll see is the Legendary Sannin failing a high profile mission. The skill of your opponent likely won't even factor in."

"True, soon we won't be active ninja at all." mused Jiraiya forlornly. "I can keep spying, Tsunade can keep healing, and Orochimaru can keep… doing Orochimaru things, but as for active duty, we're getting a little too long in the tooth to keep up a near perfect record like this." Orochimaru glared at his white haired teammate upon hearing his research referred to like that.

"Sadly, my lecherous comrade is correct, practically if not politically. I've yet to figure out the secret of immortality" joked Orochimaru, neglecting to mention the hundreds that had died in his attempts. They all knew what he did, no need to bring it up again. "Perhaps we will just need to be content with our past accomplishments as we fade into obscurity." he lamented. Jiraiya wasn't sure if Orochimaru was being sarcastic or morbid, but no one was ever sure when Orochimaru's notoriously dark humor was on display over his equally notorious dark demeanor.

"Has a Hidden Village ever just lost three S-Ranked ninja at one time like that though?" pointed out Tsunade. "I'm not sure that we can afford to just stop until the Hidden Leaf has a few more legends to fall back on."

"An interesting proposal. Who would you recommend to fill the void we will leave? Kakashi Hatake perhaps? The man with stolen jutsu copied with a stolen eye? Few respect him as more than a decent opponent. Might Guy? The man who cannot use ninjutsu or genjutsu? Or perhaps sensei's wayward son, who left the village itself for years on end?" said Orochimaru, mocking and dismissing each choice as he rattled them off. "Face it Tsunade, our ninja simply don't have the training we did. Sensei was able to elevate even Jiraiya to one of the most respected and feared ninja in the world. Kakashi and Guy's teachers couldn't do that, and neither can they."

"Orochimaru's right, much as it pains me to say that." said Jiraiya, only half joking. "When it comes to S-Ranked ninja's, the training pedigree is almost as important as actual skill. Being trained by anyone less qualified than an S-ranked ninja is a quick ride to obscurity, barring a few exceptions."

"Perhaps…" started the Third Hokage, drifting off into thought before he could finish his thought. Orochimaru raised an eyebrow, and Tsunade was visibly annoyed by her mentor's secrecy. Jiraiya was curious and excited though, two things that made for an energetic Sannin.

"Come on Sensei, you can't just leave us hanging like that!" complained the Toad Sage like a petulant child. Orochimaru sighed at his teammate's antics, and Tsunade had to breathe deeply to prevent herself from adding an injury that she would have to heal later to the old pervert.

"I was just thinking, perhaps it's time you three took on some students." said the elderly Hokage, grinning at his pupils' reactions. The three were obviously not all that keen on the idea, and Orochimaru was the only one who appeared to be giving it serious thought. Tsunade had reverted to the attitude held by a rebellious teenager, dead set on not training anymore students simply because it had been suggested to her. Jiraiya on the other hand seemed almost depressed about the idea.

It made sense to the Hokage. Out of the three of them, Jiraiya's apprentice had been the one to achieve the most. Shizune and Anko were good ninja, no doubt about it, but neither of them enjoyed the success Minato had. The Fourth Hokage was also the only one of the three to have died in the line of duty. And while they hadn't been Leaf ninja, the Third had heard in passing about three orphans Jiraiya had trained during the war that had also died.

"I'm not training a team of little brats. Medical ninjutsu is not for the faint of heart. Anyone you assign me would be dead within the week due their own gross incompetence." complained Tsunade.

The Third smiled again. "Then I shall allow you to choose one apprentice. A full team for each of you is a bit much. After all you aren't me." The Hokage laughed a bit at his own joke. "If you feel there are no worthy candidates to train, we can wait and try again next year."

"You've finally gone senile, old man. Jiraiya, you agree with me, right?" asked Tsunade, turning to her teammate who had been uncharacteristically quiet. She was surprised when he slowly looked their Sensei in the eyes and spoke up.

"I'll give it a shot. Just one." The Third was just as surprised as Tsunade, even if he didn't show it outwardly as she did. He had honestly expected Orochimaru would be the only supporter of this spur of the moment idea. He certainly never expected Jiraiya to go along willingly, let alone support the idea.

"Then it's settled. I'll leave the manner of testing up to you three then." said the Third, waving his hand in a bit of an informal dismissal as he raised his pipe to his mouth and took a long draw.

"No need for my apprentice." said Orochimaru cryptically as he walked out. "There's only one possible candidate for me, I just have to see if he can cut it."

"Weirdo." muttered Jiraiya under his breath as he made to exit through the window. "I'll hold auditions of some sort at the Academy. You should consider something likewise Tsunade."

Tsunade stood, mouth hanging open as she tried to process how easily her male teammates had taken this new development in stride. The Third Hokage looked up over the brim of some papers he had begun to read. "Tsunade, if you don't mind, I'm a busy man, and this meeting has gone on longer than expected already. I suggest you get moving on your test as well."

Still shell shocked, Tsunade shuffled wordlessly out of the office.

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"Alright class, that concludes today's lesson on the history of the Second Hokage's skill with Earth ninjutsu, which as we learned was…" Iruka trailed off expectantly, pointing to Sakura when she raised her hand.

"Almost nonexistent." replied the pink haired bookworm eagerly. Sakura instantly looked to see whether Sasuke had seen her get the answer right, only to be disappointed by the Uchiha's black eyes boring holes in the chalkboard at the front of the room.

"Good to see you were paying attention, Sakura." said Iruka. The smile dropped from his face as another one of his student's caught his eye. "Unlike some of us. Naruto!"

The blonde haired student in question shot awake at the sound of his name, nearly falling out of his chair in the process. Naruto barely managed to catch himself on the edge of the desk in front of him and avoid a painful crash. "I'm totally awake Sensei! And I was paying attention the whole time, honest!"

Iruka raised an eyebrow at Naruto's obvious attempt to salvage some chance of avoiding detention. "Really? Then you won't mind telling me which type of ninjutsu the Second Hokage was renowned for worldwide?"

Naruto's brow furrowed as he frantically filed through his brain for the answer. His blue eyes lit up when he remembered the obvious answer. "Well obviously the Fire Shadow from the Land of Fire would be a master of Fire Style ninjutsu." Naruto's sky-high confidence came crashing back to Earth as his classmates snickered.

Iruka sighed and placed a hand on his head. "No Naruto, that's incorrect. He was renowned worldwide for his unparalleled skill with the Water Style. If you had been paying attention you would have known that."

"Well it's not my fault he used such a random ninjutsu style. Maybe someone should have had a talk with him about common sense." said Naruto as he quickly denied his involvement in the failure. Iruka's eyelid twitched as Naruto continued. "And maybe you shouldn't teach such boring lessons."

"Naruto, the Second Hokage used the Water Style because he mastered it before he and the First Hokage founded the Hidden Leaf Village. Before that, he fought people that mostly used the Fire Style." said Iruka, carefully neglecting to mention the name of the Fire Style using clan that the Second Hokage had fought for the majority of his life out of respect for the dead. "Can you see now why using Water Style ninjutsu would be useful?"

Naruto squinted down at the floor as his argument was quickly dismantled before his eyes. Wracking his brain for another answer, he came up blank. "Well, uh, obviously, you see…" The floundering academy student was saved by the entrance of a masked ninja that appeared in the middle of the room. The Appearance of an ANBU agent in the classroom should have been enough to get the entire student body gossiping for hours, but they all knew better than to talk about an ANBU behind his back while he was still present.

The masked ninja handed a scroll to Iruka. "Orders from Lord Hokage." were the quick instructions that accompanied the message. Making a seal to focus his chakra, the ANBU agent disappeared as he had arrived, in a cloud of smoke. All ANBU training graduates were capable of using the Body Flicker technique without hand seals, but the anonymous ninja couldn't help but show off a bit for the kids. Even though it was easier, a single hand seal was flashier than the more utilitarian alternative.

As soon as he had left, the classroom was silent for a moment before exploding into conversation. Iruka let it continue as he read over the scroll, making sure none could see the orders easily. Once he was done, Iruka rolled up the scroll and coughed subtly to get the class's attention. When that failed spectacularly, he opted to get their attention in a more vocal way. "QUIET!" The students jumped a bit at the loud shout from the front of the room before sheepishly quieting down.

Clearing his throat, Iruka continued. "These are orders form the Third Hokage himself, and while most of it is administrative things I'll need to handle, there is one bit of information I'm allowed, no, supposed to share with you." Any attention the class hadn't had firmly on Iruka was fixed there now. Even Shikamaru had deigned to wake up, and Sasuke looked a bit more attentive, if such a thing were possible. "In one month's time, the Three Legendary Sannin will be holding… auditions of sorts, the purpose of which will be to select a single apprentice for each of them. The three will be looking for certain things that I don't know about, but whoever impresses them the most will be selected to become their apprentice."

The news, coupled with the unfortunate timing of the bell was enough to send every student clamoring out of the classroom, eager to begin training to earn the prestigious position. Even Shikamaru drug his feet a little less, and Sasuke of all people looked downright eager to get training. Naruto in the meantime, was making a beeline straight for a place he had vowed to avoid for the rest of his life. The library. If he could get a book, any book, about the Sannin, he could figure out exactly how to impress them. Naruto wasn't one for reading, but desperate times called for desperate measure.

Naruto sprinted into the library, slowing considerably when the librarian glared at from behind horn rimmed glasses. Tiptoeing through the library, Naruto searched for the books about legendary ninja, only to find every last one dealing with the legendary Sannin missing. "What! Where are the books?"

"You, looking for a book? This world really is full of wonders." Naruto turned around at the angelic voice behind him to come face to face with Sakura. "And can you be any louder? This is a library."

"Sakura! You gotta help me!" Noticing her scowl, Naruto continued, albeit at a much lower volume. "All the books about the Sannin are gone. It's probably some kind of book thief or something. You gotta help me find them, I need those books!"

"There's no 'book thief' Naruto. I checked those books out last week for an extra credit report I've been working on. I was on my way to renew them when I saw you here. I was wondering why you of all people were here, but now it all makes sense." said Sakura as she began to walk away.

"No, wait Sakura, don't go!" Naruto whisper-yelled as he speed-walked after her. "I need those books! If you give them to me… I'll go out on a date with you!"

Sakura stopped, and Naruto almost ran into her. The pink haired bookworm slowly turned around to look at Naruto with a mix of repulsion and curiosity. "I would rather burn these books than give them to you if that's the case."

"Come on Sakura! At least tell me what they're about. Anything would help." begged Naruto as he fell to his knees, comically begging at her feet.

Sakura sighed heavily as she opened one of the three books she had with one hand and absently flipped through it. "Fine. I won't tell you too much though. I still want to win that apprenticeship as well. Lady Tsunade is revered for her strength and medical knowledge, Lord Jiraiya for his ninjutsu and seals, and Lord Orochimaru for his unique and forbidden ninjutsu that he develops himself. We covered all that in class last week in the supplemental readings, so I'm guessing it's all new information to you."

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou!" cried Naruto as he hugged Sakura's legs melodramatically. "Thank you so much Sakura!"

"Yuck! Get off me!" exclaimed Sakura as she smacked Naruto over the head with the Tales of the Gallant Jiraiya. The girl looked over her head to Naruto, who was nursing a new head wound. "I plan on getting a spot, and Sasuke's a shoe-in. I suppose that leaves a spot left for you, so I suppose it wouldn't hurt too much to wish you luck."

Naruto's eyes began to well up with tears at the gesture. "Sakura… do you want to go out with me later today?"

"No. In fact, forget what I just said, I hope you fail catastrophically. Bye." deadpanned Sakura as she headed to the checkout counter to renew her loan on the books. Naruto groaned at his latest failure, but was soon in good enough spirits once leaving the oppressive atmosphere of the library. Naruto had done some digging around town for any more info on the Sannin, and had struck gold with a book written by Jiraiya himself. Naruto decided to celebrate by testing out Ichiraku's new delivery service, and headed home instead of to the ramen stand. After eating the noodles, Naruto came to the conclusion that they were still superior to every other food, though much better when fresh.

"Alright, I don't even know what forbidden techniques are, other than the fact that they're forbidden, so I probably won't be learning some anytime soon." mused Naruto aloud. "I totally bombed that first aid unit last year, so there's no way I could make it as Tsunade's apprentice. That leaves Jiraiya. And he uses ninjutsu. Ha, easy enough! Look out world, here comes Naruto Uzumaki, Sannin's apprentice in the making!"

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The Academy was not just a single building, but rather a large compound consisting of several large buildings. Several were devoted to teaching students, and were what most people referred to when talking about the Academy. There was also an administrative section where the Hokage's Office and various other mission dispensing places were located. The older chunin and jonin who worked in the administrative portion of the compound rarely interacted with the Academy students, to the point that it was very easy to forget you worked at a school.

Not today though. Today was a spectacle that drug out every administrator and assistant that wasn't assigned a job of national security and upmost importance. And even a few that had. Today the Three Legendary Sannin, three of the most prestigious ninja to come out of the Hidden Leaf Village in decades, were holding auditions of a sort to select an apprentice from the Academy students. While none of the children were likely to do anything that they all couldn't do, it was still a big event.

And big events meant nerves. "Oh man, I hope I'm ready." muttered Naruto under his breath as he waited for his name to be called. One disadvantage of having a name that began with the letter U was being called near the end of any alphabetical list.
"Hmph. I was born ready. You could save yourself some time and just go home now." gloated Sasuke, who was sitting next to Naruto. Another disadvantage of having a name starting with the letter U was being forced to sit next to others whose names started with the letter U. Sandwiched between his least favorite person in the world and one of the Uchiha's fans, Naruto was not in a good mood.

"Of course Sasuke's going to win the spot. A dead last like you doesn't stand a chance." boasted Ino from Naruto's left.

"If Sasuke's going to win the spot, why are you even here?" asked Naruto in confusion. Ino looked at him as if he were stupid.

"There's three spots available. I'm not going for the same spot Sasuke is, simple as that." explained Ino simply. A tester popped his head around the doorframe. "Uchiha, Sasuke?" he asked in a bored tone, as if he didn't know who was next. "This way please."

Sasuke stood up, the perfect picture of confidence. "I'd ask you to wish me luck, but I won't need it." The Uchiha exited into the next room without looking back.

"So cool…" muttered Ino as Naruto settled for trying to set Sasuke on fire with his glare as he ground his teeth together.

"Alright kiddo." Sasuke's eyes narrowed at being called kiddo, but he knew better than to speak up to an S-Rank ninja that could put him in the fast lane in regards to catching up to him. "Show me what you got. Your best ninjutsu." said Jiraiya, trying to sound excited about watching another substation, or a clone, or a transformation, as if any of those would impress a man of such high taste.

Sasuke didn't respond, instead running through the seals that had been passed down through the Uchiha clan as a coming of age ritual for generations. "Fire Style: Grand Fireball Jutsu!" It was lucky that the area being used for testing was the one used by the ninja of the village for jutsu development, and therefore fireproof. The flames bore down on the Sannin quickly, and engulfed Jiraiya for several seconds. Sasuke was worried for a brief second, thinking that he had accidently killed the man who was supposed to teach him before remembering that Jiraiya was a Sannin, and not capable of being killed so easily.

Even knowing Jiraiya was undoubtedly alive wasn't enough to stop the reflexive jump when a hand placed itself on his shoulder. "Well now, that was certainly a surprise. You really live up to your clan name, kid. Unfortunately, I don't take your clan name into account. We'll see if that was good enough, but I won't lie, it's looking good for you. NEXT!" Sasuke flinched again when Jiraiya shouted right next to his ear. Still, it wasn't enough to put a damper on his spirits. The only people left were Naruto and Ino, and Ino was trying to pass Tsunade's test.

Sasuke made sure to wear a cocky smirk as he walked out. After all, confidence was half the battle. Naruto glared as he walked past the Uchiha, but quickly dropped that once he entered the testing room. "Alright kiddo. Show me what you got. Hit me with your best ninjutsu." said Jiraiya, still a bit excited about finding a student who might be passable.

"Alright then, I've been working on this one for a while!" Naruto threw his hands into the seals for the transformation technique, and Jiraiya gave up a bit inside, though he remained impassive on the outside. "Sexy Jutsu: Icha Icha Paradise!" The name alone was enough to shock Jiraiya out of his internal musings, and he looked intently at the smoke cloud, confused as to what had just happened. Jiraiya could have sworn that it was the transformation technique, but an original jutsu was infinitely more impressive.

The smoke cleared to reveal a buxom blonde striking an incredibly sexy pose and wearing a bit of incredibly revealing lingerie. The sex appeal alone was enough to almost send the self-proclaimed super pervert spiraling into a blissful unconsciousness, but he had a duty to evaluate these kids. He couldn't afford to pass out on the job. Forcing himself to stay focused, Jiraiya got another look at the beauty in front of him.

Then it hit him. This was familiar. The lingerie and pose were straight out of his most recent book. It had taken him a second to recognize it, since the heroine and the woman she was based on was a brunette, but it was undeniably from his books. Unable to take it anymore, Jiraiya succumbed to the spray of blood from his nose that left him passed out on the floor in a pool of his own blood, wearing a massive grin on his face.

"Are you OK?" shouted Naruto as he transformed back into his prepubescent body. He was stopped from approaching the downed Sannin by a masked ANBU who appeared in a cloud of smoke between him and Jiraiya.

"No need to worry. I'll take it from here." said the ANBU member calmly from behind his mask. "You just head back to the waiting room." Naruto knew better than to argue with an ANBU member, and sulked out the entrance to the room, casting a glance over his shoulder at the ANBU member throwing the Sannin over his shoulder and disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

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"So, an Academy student managed to send the gallant Jiraiya to the hospital? I'm almost ashamed to be a member of your team." said Orochimaru as he visited his teammate in the hospital.

"Actually, Tsunade sent me her after an ANBU member dragged me to her for resuscitation. I'd have been fine, but I answered a bit too honestly when she asked what had knocked me out." admitted Jiraiya sheepishly. "On the plus side, I should be able to get my apprentice's name to Sensei by the end of the day once I get out of here. What about you? Got your student singled out from all the applicants?"

"Kukuku, as if I would let my apprentice be decided by the showing of a single day. I've been whittling down a potential list of candidates since day one. I've actually had my apprentice selection in last week." said Orochimaru, smiling smugly at his preparedness.

"Well, you always were the genius. I prefer to go more on gut feeling. So who gets to inherit your creepiness?" asked Jiraiya jokingly, wincing as he sat up. "I plan on training the kid who started the dominoes that landed me here. It wasn't as showy as others, but it was an original twist on an old classic. And I can teach him all the showy jutsu in the world, it's up to him to make sure they don't go to waste."

"The choice was rather obvious once I began to employ some harsher requirements. Forbidden jutsu require a massive chakra capacity, the ability to get back up after something goes wrong, and a unique perspective on the world." said Orochimaru.

"Well, let's have a name." goaded Jiraiya. "Who's going to be Naruto Uzumaki's rival?"

Orochimaru's golden eyes widened at the name, before he nervously swallowed. "We… might just have a problem."

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Naruto sat at the counter of Ichiraku's sulking. The official selections had yet to be announced tomorrow, but he was certain he had failed. There was no way Jiraiya would select a student who had humiliated him with such a simple technique when he could select someone who knew how to spit fireballs, as Naruto had later found out Sasuke could. It suddenly made Sasuke a little more likeable. Only a little though.

"Something got you down?" asked Ichiraku as he placed a large bowl of ramen down in front of Naruto. Naruto had planned on eating this for the past few days, either as a celebration or a pick-me-up. Unfortunately it was the latter, and Ichiraku could pick up on his favorite customer's mood.

"Nah, I'm just not feeling good about the Sannin test thingy." said Naruto glumly around a mouth full of noodles. Ichiraku nodded sagely and grunted in acknowledgement.

"Well, you know Naruto, three ninja became Hokage without being trained by the Sannin, and even the Fourth graduated like the rest of them. Besides, you're probably just being a little hard on yourself." said Ichiraku, as another customer came in. "What can I get for you sir?"

The dark haired man brushed his long hair out of the way of his golden eyes. "I'll just have whatever he's having." he said, gesturing to Naruto. "I couldn't help but overhear, and I must disagree. You might be being a bit harsh on yourself, but the Sannin are going to be harsher in their selection than you could imagine. They'll accept only the best."

Naruto's mood deflated instantly, and the man seemed taken aback by the change in attitude. "Of course, they can't have such high standards that they're unreachable. I'm sure you stand a fighting chance."

"You really think so?" asked Naruto hopefully. "I mean, all I did was the transformation technique. Sasuke spit fire. Fire! How am I supposed to compete with that!?" he asked, throwing his hands up in the air.

The ninja looked around to make sure nobody was looking or listening, before leaning in close to Naruto. "If you really want to cinch it, there's a secret test nobody's been told about."

Naruto looked at him skeptically. "Why would there be a test nobody knows about? And if nobody knows about it, how come you know?"

"Kukuku. I'm a test proctor, charged by the Sannin themselves to select prospective candidates. And you fit the bill. You can think of it as a second round for the few selected to move on." explained the man. "All you have to do is learn a jutsu from one of the Hokage's scrolls by the end of the night."

Naruto's eyes began to sparkle with determination. "Really? All I have to do is learn a jutsu? If that's what it takes, that's what I'll do!" Naruto got up and ran out of the ramen stand, got about ten feet before turning around and running back to stick his head back in. "Thanks mister! And thanks for the ramen old man Ichiraku!"

Teuchi turned around at Naruto's shout. "Wait a second Naruto! You didn't pay!" he yelled in vain, but Naruto was already gone. Teuchi sighed. "Whatever, I'll just get it from him next time. Sorry for the wait, here's your order."

"Thank you." said the dark haired man as he snapped his chopsticks in half to dig in. "I'll foot the bill for my energetic little friend as well. I'm feeling particularly generous today."

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Naruto had honestly been expecting more difficulty with this secret test. There hadn't been any ANBU at the Hokage's residence, not that that was surprising. They were never seen if they didn't want to be, and the Hokage was perfectly capable of fending off anyone he didn't want in his house. But the Third Hokage himself had either missed or ignored the silent alarms that went off the moment Naruto stepped onto the property, and Naruto had made out with the largest scroll he could find. After all, if it was big, it had to be important.

Naruto retreated to the woods around the village, figuring that his own home would be a bad place to start spitting fireballs. Naruto cracked open the scroll to look at the contents, and was terrified to see that he had apparently grabbed a scroll of forbidden jutsu. Naruto shook his head, realizing he couldn't go back and get a different scroll, and began looking for any jutsu that didn't kill the user or everything in a mile radius.

"Alright Shadow Clones, I will make you mine, and you will hopefully not kill me." he muttered Naruto as he zeroed in on his target. His class hadn't even begun the Clone jutsu yet, but how hard could it be? Several hours later into the night, and the answer was apparently found to be very hard. Making the seal one more time, Naruto poured as much chakra as he could into the technique. The resulting cloud of smoke cleared to reveal a Naruto equally as tired as the original, but in no way deformed, pale, or intangible like all previous attempts.

"Very good." said a familiar voice, as the dark haired man from before emerged from the woods, slowly clapping his hands. "That's a very steep learning curve there. Care to hand over the scroll?"

"Depends." said Naruto as he tried not to stagger sideways from exhaustion. "Did I pass?"

"Kukuku. Foolish boy, there was never a 'secret test'. It was a ruse to lure both you and the scroll away from the village where I could make a hasty retreat to the Hidden Rock." laughed the man, as he discarded the Hidden Leaf headband on his forehead and donned one bearing the emblem of the Hidden Rock Village.

"What!" exclaimed Naruto as he and his clone took a step backwards. "Why me? What did I do?"

"The scroll full of forbidden jutsu should be enough, but jinchuriki are even more valuable bargaining chips when defecting." Seeing the confused look on Naruto's face, the man laughed again. "Kukuku, that's right. They never told you, did they?"

"Told me what?" asked Naruto, not really sure if he wanted to know the answer.

"Foolish boy. Jinchuriki are those who hold back the Tailed Beasts. You have the Nine Tailed Fox sealed within you. Right now, it lays dormant, but with training, you could become the most devastating ninja to ever live. So you can join me, or I can take you by force."

Naruto's hands lay limp at his sides as he tried to process the information. "So… that's why… they all look at me like that?" he asked slowly.

"I'd imagine so." said the man, inspecting his fingernails nonchalantly. "So which will it be? Willingly defect, or forcefully be taken? The only difference in the result is where your loyalties will lie."

"I might not like this whole Nine Tailed thing, but if you think I'm defecting form the Leaf because of that, YOU'RE CRAZY!" he shouted, causing the old man to raise an eyebrow. "SHADOW CLONE TECHNIQUE!" A massive cloud of smoke enveloped the clearing, revealing an uncountable number of Naruto clones that all descended on the man standing calmly in the middle. Their fists connected successfully time and again, and in minutes the previously confident defector was lying on the ground, barely able to keep breathing.

Naruto dismissed his clones and grinned at his victory, but the smile faded when the man began to turn brown and fall apart like he was made of mud. Naruto felt a sharp impact on the back of his neck before he fell into unconsciousness.

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"The hell did you do to him!?" shouted Tsunade, devoting as little attention to healing the blonde in front of her as she could and be successful. "You were just supposed to test him!"

Orochimaru shrugged. "I hold my apprentice to a higher standard. It's not my fault forbidden jutsu are more difficult to test for than keeping a fish alive out of water for a few minutes."

The Third Hokage spoke up, stopping the argument. "Regardless, Naruto will be fine, and you have all selected your pupils, even if Orochimaru's test was a little… unorthodox. We will announce the results tomorrow at the Academy. I assume he will up and about before then?"

Tsunade stopped using the Mystic Palm technique to look at her sensei. "We all know he'd be fine without my help, and we all know why. Including him, now." The last part was accompanied with a sharp glare at Orochimaru.

The Third Hokage sighed heavily. "I too wish you had been a little more… tactful with the information." Orochimaru shrugged once more, this time with a smug grin.

"He was going to find out eventually. This way I managed to test both skill, determination, and loyalty to the village in the face of adversity. What more could you want?" he asked rhetorically.

"I'll want you to answer his questions tomorrow after the announcements and apologize for your heavy-handed methods." Orochimaru nodded, and the Hokage turned to his third student. "And Jiraiya! Stop sulking in the corner like that. It's downright depressing."

Jiraiya looked up solemnly. "It's just not fair Orochimaru gets him. I had dibs!"

Orochimaru leaned onto his teammate, grinning like a cat that had caught a mouse. "I had dibs for half a month. No my fault you didn't think to even look at the prospects until the day of auditions. I didn't even need to waste my time with one of those."

"Alright!" said the Hokage loudly, hoping to derail another argument. "You should all rest up, since I expect you to start training your new apprentice's tomorrow. And Orochimaru? Start slow with the boy. Use a pig or something."

"I planned to. Human corpses are valuable, if not exactly rare." said Orochimaru as he exited the office.

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Naruto woke the next morning in his own bed, feeling more well rested than he had in months. He briefly wondered if last night had really happened, then decided to test whether or not it had, bringing his fingers up into the crossed seal he had practiced for hours yesterday. If the events of yesterday really had been a dream of some sort, then absolutely nothing should happen. But if a clone popped into existence, then the events would be undeniably true.

Sure enough, one cloud of smoke later, and Naruto was looking at an exact replica of himself. The two Naruto's sighed in unison as the truth hit home, and they both sat down on Naruto's bed, shoulders sagging. "Well it's awesome that I know how to do this, but what the hell happened last night?" said Naruto, before growling his frustrations at the sky.

"Well, that spy person turned into mud, and then you collapsed." Naruto sat up, confused for a moment before remembering that the clone was there. "So I'm as clueless as you as to what exactly happened after that. Who knows what happened to the scroll, or that jerk spy, or you for that matter." lamented the clone.

Naruto groaned once more. "I'm going to be in so much trouble with the old man." The clone seemed just as distraught by the knowledge that they had let down the one person who really liked him in the entire village.

"Maybe he won't notice?" suggested the clone, wincing at his own forced optimism. "I mean, did you see how many scrolls he had? What's one more?" The clone looked around, before his eyes widened in panic. "Though if you want things to just blow over, you have to get to the Academy, ASAP!" The clone got up, and grabbed ahold of Naruto's arm, pulling before the latter could figure out what the clone was doing.

As Naruto stumbled up, the clone's grip slipped, and he fell backwards. Struggling and failing to keep his balance, the clone slipped and bashed his head on the corner of the dresser, exploding into a cloud of smoke at the sharp contact. Naruto winced at the clone's destruction and rubbed his head at the phantom pains. "Yikes, I felt that." said Naruto, chalking it up to a great sense of empathy for the clone that had effectively died in front of him.

Still, the late shadow clone had made a good point, any more contemplation about the issue would make him late for school, on the one day something interesting had a chance of happening. Even if he wasn't picked to be an apprentice of the Sannin, it would be interesting to see who was at the very least.

Bolting out the door, Naruto sprinted down the street in an effort to make it on time. He skidded through the door of the classroom just seconds before the bell rang, earning an annoyed look from Iruka for his close call. "Glad you could make it, Naruto. Take your seat, and we can finally get started." Naruto sheepishly grinned and rubbed the back of his neck as he grabbed an available seat and sat down. Iruka cleared his throat and looked down at his itinerary. "Now then, the Hokage will be along by the end of the hour with the Sannin themselves to announce the results I'm sure you're all eager to hear, so we'll make the time until then a free period. Feel free to brush up on your clone technique, because there will be a quiz on it later today."

The class celebrated at the news of a free period, though an unspoken agreement kept the overall noise level down in fear of earning Iruka's ire and ruining it. The student broke off into smaller groups of friends around the room to study, gossip, or just hang out. Naruto finally spared a moment to look around to see who had sat down next to. "What a drag. I can't believe we're having another test today. I could have sworn we just had one last week."

"We could always skip out if you want to. Not that it matters, since I'll be gone by the end of the hour with my new sensei." bragged Naruto, though his boasts were more bluster than substance if he had the courage to admit it to himself.

Shikamaru scoffed, but the effect was lost as he transitioned to a yawn halfway through. "Thanks, but no thanks. I'll have to pull out a C to keep my mom off my back. Troublesome. Wake me when something interesting happens." With that, the Nara boy folded him arms on the desk in front of him as a makeshift pillow as he drifted to sleep.

"Nice talking with you, Shikamaru." muttered Naruto, though the sarcasm fell on deaf ears. Or rather, it fell on sleeping ears. Naruto took another look around the room, determined not to spend up to an hour in silence. His eyes naturally gravitated towards the largest group in the room, which turned out to be the mass of girls milling around Sasuke, who was doing nothing but staring intently at the front of the room, as if it held the answers to life. All that was on the board was the date, April 2nd. Naruto got up and stalked over to the group.

Sasuke sat, trying to ignore the screeching voices around him. His method of pretending they didn't exist worked well enough as long as he kept looking straight ahead as if the board held the answers to life itself. None of his self-proclaimed "fans" would get in his way as long as it looked like he was doing something he wanted to do. The few times people tried to force eye contact didn't last lost. Even without the famed Sharingan of the Uchiha clan, his glare was plenty intimidating enough for an Academy student.

He instinctively narrowed his eyes to scare off the newcomer who suddenly appeared in his field of vision before he even registered who it was. Naruto took the glare as a challenge, and perched himself on the desk to get as close to the Uchiha as he could to return the glare. It took all of Sasuke's willpower not to show any expression, even though he wanted to sigh in frustration and bury his face in his hands. The girls around him began to voice their complaints at Naruto's proximity to the focus of their praise, but Sasuke had shown no wish for them to interfere and was perfectly capable of getting rid of the dead last by himself, so they all stood by, even falling into silence after a while.

The glaring contest continued, drawing the attention of the rest of the class. Interested in the commotion behind him, the student in the row directly in front of Sasuke stood up to turn around. In doing so, he bumped the orange clad student who was unexpectedly squatting on the desk above him. Naruto's arms wheeled in vain as he tried desperately to regain his balance. Sasuke's eyes opened wide in surprise and horror as Naruto fell forward. Sasuke tried to get out of the way to avoid the inevitable collision, but only resulted in moving the site of impact. If he had stayed unflinching, Sasuke would have gotten a nasty bump on the head, but since he had pulled away, the part of his head that made contact with Naruto was a bit… further down.

The girls looked on at the lip lock in horror. It was fortunate that all attention was on the two rivals who were busy trying to find a wire brush to scour their mouths with, as nobody could attest to any blushing that may or may not have occurred. Any vengeance for Sasuke's first kiss was put on hold by some high pitched laughter from the front of the room. "Kukuku. Perhaps you could use that in your next book Jiraiya. It can't do much worse than your first horrendous attempt at literature."

Scarred as he was, Jiraiya's voice was barely more than a whisper. "S-shut up." Tsunade sighed in irritation as she walked up to the group of girls that were now looking at the Sannin in wonder.

"You're with me." she said tersely, literally grabbing Sakura by the arm and dragging her out of the room. By the time anyone realized what had just happened, the two were already out the door.

"Well then." said Jiraiya, clearing his throat awkwardly. "Tsunade didn't do a great job of explaining it, but we're here to pick up our selections. Now then, Sasuke Uchiha, you'll be my apprentice, don't let me down! Test one, find me!" Near the end, Jiraiya regained his usual bluster and bravado before disappearing in a cloud of smoke. Sasuke's eyes widened before he jumped out the window in a hurry.

Naruto sagged in his seat when Jiraiya announced that Sasuke had beaten him out. He suddenly shot up as a hand was placed on his shoulder. "Don't count yourself out yet, you'll be getting instruction from yours truly." Naruto looked up to Orochimaru, who made a hand seal before they both disappeared in a puff of smoke.

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A/N: First chapter is up! Wooo! This is my new story, where updates will be sparse, so follow so you know when I get around to updating. Just like with my other story, the goal is to introduce as many original ideas as I can into the fandom, so feel free to use any ideas you want to as long as you credit me. I'll just shamelessly plug my previous fic one last time, since it should be finished at the same time assuming everything worked, so check it out if you haven't read it already. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and reviews are always appreciated! See ya!

Edit: Just some grammar error fixes and such. Changed some wording to make certain sentences less confusing/more interesting. Nothing major.