Disclaimer: see my profile

A/n this is a two shot Halloween tale set this year, but having nothing to do with the last episode. Hope you enjoy and as always thanks to my wonderful beta for all her help.

The Forest

He couldn't believe he'd agreed to this. He stood in a long line, outside, in the dark with a few hundred other people that were shuffling their feet and talking over each other. Trying to make out an individual conversation was impossible, so he concentrated on looking around Harlow Farms. He leaned against a thick log fence that forced the crowd into a line that wound up to the Haunted Forest. The wind lifted his hair off his forehead and he shivered. It wasn't very cold for Halloween, but it did carry the smell of earth and fallen leaves.

The line moved forward, but he didn't realize that his friends had walked forward until Gerry called back to him.

"Come on, Spencer. You're holding up the line," said the man around Spencer's age with light brown hair and grey eyes and a square jaw face with thick glasses and heavy eyebrows.

Reid looked around and noticed that several people behind him were staring at him.

"Sorry," he said to no one in particular.

"What's up with you, Spencer?"

Gerry, Mike and Jimmy stood about three feet ahead of him and they were all smirking.

"We're almost there," Jimmy said and pointed needlessly to the line as it disappeared into the trees.

He shouldn't have agreed to this farce, Spencer thought. The forest, if you could call it a real forest, spread out over about two and a half acres to the west of the farm. There were lights strung along the path going into the forest at certain places, but a lot of darkness under a new moon.

Don't freak out… It's only darkness and you're an adult for God sake.

"Hey, get outta the way, idiot," said a man dressed up like a psychotic clown with fake blood running down his face.

"Sorry."

"Geez, Spencer." Mike grabbed his arm and pulled him forward. "You're gonna get us belted if you don't stop daydreamin'."

A very tall man, Spencer supposed it was a man, stood at the head of the line. He wore a black cape and hood. His face resembled a skeleton, as did his hands. Reid studied him and thought the makeup artist for the attraction must be a professional. This man seemed to be taking tickets and letting people into the forest in small groups at about three minute intervals. He didn't speak, just gestured with his hands like Charon the Ferryman on the River Styx.

"Spencer, stop foolin' around."

He followed his friends, because he didn't have a choice. The fence and other people prevented him from leaving. He was stopped by the Charon look-a-like. "You can't go in there with that, mister."

He looked down at his sidearm and sighed. He pulled out his badge and flashed it. "FBI," he said very quietly.

"Right," said Charon. "Move along, please."

"Yeah, I'd like to get going sometime this year," said someone from behind.

He hurried to catch his friends as they entered the forest. His feet crunched on scattered leaves. The pathway was dark, but there was enough light to keep it clearly marked. It wouldn't do for anyone to get lost, Reid thought wryly.

"Oh man, look at that."

He finally noticed that they were passing by a large Egyptian sarcophagus that Reid decided someone had made from particleboard, but it was painted to look like gold, and had real hieroglyphics and other symbols painted on the lid and the sides as well as a face that he thought resembled old paintings he'd seen of Queen Nefertiti.

The lid slid back off the sarcophagus as they passed and a mummy sat up and reached for a young woman with long blond hair and the young man holding her hand. She screamed and most of the young guys laughed. The mummy roared and then returned to his final resting place before the lid slid back into place. Spencer figured it was all mechanical and not very scary at all.

"Spencer?"

Mike gave him a dark look. "What?" Spencer asked irritably.

"Stop trying to figure out the tricks."

"That was easy. It was mechanical and not very well done. You could tell because the mummy's wrappings were too uniform and clean. They were obviously -"

"Shut up, Spencer. We're here to have fun, not analyze the scares."

"I didn't want to come here tonight, but as usual, I let you take advantage of my good will."

Mike snorted as they moved around another corner to their right. "Can you just once pretend that you're enjoying yourself?

"No, we had a case, so I worked all day. I had plans to watch some scary movies and gorge on pop corn. Instead, I'm here with you because I let you take advantage of me goodwill."

Two couples, dressed like Goths in black clothing and chains pushed by them. "Why don't ya get outta the way," said one of the girls.

"Yeah, dumb ass."

"Hey," Gerry began, but Reid grabbed his arm and shook his head.

The Goth kids laughed and swayed their way around a right turn into the

forest.

"Whaddya let them do that?"

"Mike, the best thing to do with kids like that is ignore them. They've had plenty to drink and probably chased it with some narcotics. Let it go!"

"Yeah," Jimmy agreed. "We're here to have fun, not engage with drugged up adolescents."

"Funny," Gerry frowned. "Come on then," he led the way around the bend.

They didn't see the Goth kids again, but they did come up behind a family consisting of mom, dad, what looked to Spencer like a twelve-year-old girl and a ten-year-old year old boy. As they navigated around a large elm tree, a guy with a chainsaw burst into the small clearing. He headed right for them, wearing tattered clothing and white face paint with black shadows under his eyes and blood on his hands.

The kids and the mother screamed. The kids attempted to bolt, but the father herded them away as the man with the chainsaw changed direction and came at Reid's group. His friends laughed, except for Mike who shrieked like a woman, and Reid who simply stood there without reacting. He could clearly see the saw didn't have a chain.

"Come on, Mike, Gerry said and slapped him up the back side of his very curly black hair. "Stop screaming like a girl."

"I don't scream like a girl."

"Can we go?" Spencer held out his arm to the pathway to the north.

Jimmy, the quiet one in the group rolled his eyes and led the way. A puff of wind rattled the nearly leafless trees around them as they hurried up the path. Reid studiously ignored the fetid stench of leaves beginning to rot in the earth and the smell of dirt under his feet.

"Hey," Jimmy called back. "You guys are going to love this."

Reid increased his pace and burst into a white webbed corner with several large, black spiders hanging from it. A couple of girls screamed as they entered behind Reid and the guys laughed. Reid started forward, and a large black spider with a red hourglass on its back dropped down on his shoulder. He barely escaped shouting aloud before realizing the creature was a fake.

"Ha, ha," Mike howled. "You look like you're going to faint."

Reid's heart finally began to slow down from its frantic beat. He irritably knocked the toy away and it was drawn up as if on a hoist. He shoved his sweaty hands into his pockets and scowled at his friends. "If this is the best they can do with fake spider and guys with chainless chainsaws…"

"Ah, come on, Spencer, we're just here to have fun. Get in the spirit, will you?"

He followed them out of the spider den and up a short rise into another clearing of trees. The first thing Reid saw was a man wearing a leather apron, dirty trousers, and no shirt. He also wore an executioner's or torturer's mask over his face. He was huge, with bulging muscles and legs the size of small tree trunks. Strapped to a tilted table in front of him, lay a young man with his arms over his head and tied to something that looked like a medieval torture rack. He didn't speak or make any sign that he knew they were there. The masked man picked up a glowing fire poker and laid it on the face of the man. A scream echoed through the wood, but it was all acting, Reid knew, so he didn't howl like the girlfriends of three guys that had entered the clearing behind them.

"This is so lame," Jimmy moaned, and Reid had to agree.

He'd heard real screams, from victims facing true horrors that were pale in comparison to this parody of suffering.

"Let's go," he said to his friends.

They went to their left and down another little rise. In front of them sat a woman wearing a black robe and conical hat. She stirred something that smelled worse than some of the morgues Reid had seen. She looked up and cackled at them.

"You dare enter the haunted forest," she crooned in a gravelly voice. "Beware, the horrors you've seen are nothing to what awaits you."

The guys snorted laughter, but Reid merely watched the woman with green skin and a long wooden spoon in her hand. She slowly stirred the bubbling concoction that looked real to Spencer.

"I can give you the relief of forgetfulness with my potion."

She held out a steaming goblet to them with a ghastly smile.

"No way," Gerry said.

They left her cackling after them and back into the darkness of the trees. "Why offer that crap to anyone?"

"I doubt there's anything harmful in it, despite the odor."

"Because they don't want to get sued if someone gets food poisoning," Jimmy said scornfully. "I'm sure no one's taking her up on it."

A man stumbled out of the forest in front of them with an axe sticking out of his head. Blood stained his tattered and filthy clothing and smeared his face. "Help me," he said breathlessly and staggered toward them with his hands outstretched. Reid stepped aside and the man passed by toward several young teens behind them.

They ignored him until a female voice screamed behind them. Reid sighed and pulled on Mike's arm who was laughing hysterically at the teenage girls

"You're a real kill joy, Spencer."

"You're acting like a twelve year old, Mike."

"It's Halloween; you're supposed to act like a kid."

"Mike… This little excursion was you idea I didn't-"

A scream interrupted Reid's tirade. He whirled around and saw a man in a black cloak with a hood pulled over his head. He had a young woman in his grasp and was trying to half drag; half carry her away into the forest off the main path.

"Help me," screamed the woman. "Someone please help me."

Reid hurried around the crowd that was watching the man drag the woman off into the darkness.

"Spencer, where're you going? It's part of the show."

"No," Reid huffed as he began to run. He pulled his revolver out of his holster and shouted. "Stop, FBI."