Ok, I suck. I know I suck. My best friend is visiting and sitting here reminding my that I suck. Because it has been like... a year. And I have had this chapter done for a while. But I wanted to get a head start on the next chapter. (Which I have on good authority is one of the best in a while!) And this chapter is MASSIVE. I'm talking almost 14,000 words massive. I tried to find a place to split it but there really wasn't a good place to. So you guys get a huge chapter as an apology.

Btw... to everyone who keeps PMing heya8713 to ask her when I am going to update -you guy make my day. I think it's hilarious that you guys are bugging one of my besties instead of me. Ethel! Gahhhh you're here! I promise to finish your chapter this weekend. Even if you are legitimately breathing down my neck while I do so!

Of course; Of course, the actor Tina was sent to contact was located in the one damn city in the world she never wanted to come to alone. Rachel silently glared at her manager from across the town car, refusing to look out the window as she silently fumed. Paris, Rachel growled to herself, it had to be Paris. Of course, they had to fly into Paris Le Bourget –the one airport near the famed city that was dedicated exclusively to private aircraft. She stood at the counter for almost an hour trying to find a way home that didn't depend on going any further with her manager than she had to. And of course, the only way she was going to get a flight was by hiring a private jet last minute –at a cost of almost $100,000.

During the entire fiasco, her manager had leaned against a nearby column with an ever growing smirk on her face.

"I won't torture either of us for longer than I have to. You have a first-class seat reserved at Roissy Airport in the morning." Tina chirped, still looking at her phone with that stupid smirk on her face.

Rachel glared at Tina as she snatched her purse off of the counter, remembering only belatedly to thank the woman behind the counter before she stormed off, only to stop when she heard Tina laugh. "Wrong way."

Rachel huffed and spun on her heel, waiting for Tina to lead them in the right direction, refusing to look at the woman much less talk to her. She hadn't spoken to her during the remainder of their two-hour flight, nor in the hour it had taken to get through customs and the failure of trying to find a flight home. She wasn't about to speak to her now.

As far as she was concerned, she wouldn't be speaking to Tina ever again. She'd been meaning to hire a personal assistant now that she was on the West Coast and now she had the perfect excuse to. She'd allow her assistant to handle any interactions she'd have to have with Tina. It was a diva move and she knew it, but that wouldn't make her feel guilty about it.

The one thing she did feel guilty about was not talking to her girlfriend. It had gone on too long and now being here, in Paris, without out her, broke her heart that much more. She needed to talk to Quinn, to deal with what had happened and what had been said. It was time, beyond time. Rachel knew she'd let this go on far too long.

She knew that she was pretty horrible about communicating. She wanted things her way or no way. And this time, she wasn't even sure what she wanted. She wanted Quinn, she knew that much for sure, but she didn't know what she wanted from Quinn. The woman had tried to apologize repeatedly over the last week and a half. She'd tried calling, texting, emailing. She'd sent flowers. It was everything that she always wanted. She finally had someone who wanted her and was willing to fight for her even in the face of absolute radio silence on her end. She knew that Quinn was sorry, but that didn't make it better. It didn't help that she still couldn't shake the guilt over what had almost happened either.

"I had taken the liberty of renting us a condo," Tina's voice broke her from thoughts, "while under the assumption that we would be sharing it while I conducted business for the next day or two." Rachel looked up as she heard the hesitation in her former friend's voice. Tina gave her a sad smile and shook her head, "I can't, and won't, apologize for what I said, Rachel. I truly believe you are walking away from everything for the wrong person. I am sorry for the way I said it, though. I understand though that it will take you a while to accept that. I just hope that she doesn't destroy you before that day comes."

She waited for Rachel to respond and sighed when the diva looked away. "I will do us both the favor of finding alternative lodging. The firm rented it out for the week, and your ticket is flexible, so stay as long as you like."

Rachel watched at Tina leaned back and spoke to the driver. She didn't want to stay in Paris; she didn't want to put off talking to Quinn any longer. She was homesick and just needed to fall into Quinn's arms and hear the love of her life tell her everything was going to be okay, that they would work it out. She needed to tell Quinn she was sorry for ignoring her when she was trying to apologize. She needed to have Quinn tell her that she was sorry for what she said and for not trusting her. She just… she needed to go home. Rachel swallowed around the lump in her throat as her eyes burned with tears she refused to cry in front of her manager.

"For what it's worth," Tina said as she slid around Rachel to get out of the car, "I hope I'm wrong."

"Me too," Rachel whispered into the space of the empty car as a tear slid down her face.

Quinn paced back and forth through the small living room, as she checked her phone again. She wasn't sure what time Rachel was supposed to land, much less when she would show up. It wasn't like Rachel had called to tell her when she should expect her. Part of her wanted to meet her at the airport, but she didn't even know what flight Rachel might possibly be on, much less if the small diva would even want her there.

Would she have run into her arms? Or would she have looked at her impassively and kept walking? Rachel had said that she wasn't leaving her, that she just needed time, but how much time? Quinn dropped her phone on the couch and shook the nervousness out of her hands. She had too much pent up energy. She felt like she needed to go for a run but she was too afraid that she would miss Rachel if she did. She could clean, but as she looked around, everything was spotless and in its place.

Quinn almost jumped out of her skin at the sound of her phone buzzing. She scrambled to grab it and say a message from an unknown number. Her hands shook as she fumbled to open it up.

Don't fuck this up, Fabray.

That was it; nothing else. Don't fuck this up. Quinn glared at the phone and fought the urge to throw her phone against the wall. Don't fuck this up, Fabray. Great advice. Quinn rolled her eyes and threw the phone back onto the couch. She had to make this right, because as much as she wanted to smack someone for telling her not to screw this up, she had almost done just that. She should have trusted Rachel. She shouldn't have let her issues lead to this.

In a perfect world, where she was the perfect girlfriend, she would have been amused that Rachel hadn't even noticed she was being flirted with. In a perfect world, she would have found it completely endearing that not only did Rachel love her so much that she was oblivious that she was being hit on, she ended up gushing about how much she loved Quinn afterward. But it wasn't a perfect world, and she wasn't a perfect girlfriend, and she had let her daddy issues and her lack of trust almost destroy the best thing that had happened to her. And she wasn't going to let that happen again. She wasn't going to fuck this up. Because she cared too much for Rachel to let that happen.

Quinn wasn't sure how long she had paced the room for, but the sky was already starting to darken by the time she collapsed onto the couch, her back spasming painfully. Quinn knew better than to try and run a marathon, run, pace, whatever, after sitting for so many hours but her nerves were getting the better of her. Quinn dug her thumbs into her lower back trying to ease some of the pressure when she heard the door open. She flew to her feet, completely ignoring the pain she was in as she stepped into the foyer. A man in a suit and hat blocked her view as he carried in two large suitcases and an attaché that she recognized instantly. Quinn tried swallowing but her mouth was dry. She rocked on her heels as her pulse thundered and her stomach twisted.

"Breathe. Just breathe. You can do this." Quinn whispered to herself over and over again as she heard a voice she would recognize anywhere thank the man. She tried to wipe the sweat from her hands but it was no use. She would be okay as long as she didn't go into a panic attack. That was the last thing she needed. So Quinn continued her mantra as she watched her diva juggle her bag to dig out a tip for the driver.

Rachel distractedly smiled and waved at the man as she stepped into the dark condo. It had been a long day that had just piled on top of a long few weeks. Rachel was exhausted and just wanted to find something to eat and a soft place to lay her head for a few hours before she made her way home. She just hoped that the condo was fully stocked and she didn't have to call out for food. Even though she could speak the language fluently, she just didn't want to deal with the hassle of it all. Rachel pushed the door shut and leaned her head against it, exhausted.

Rachel flipped around, her hand to her chest when she heard a noise behind her. If the sound of someone else in the foyer had set her heart racing, the site before her stopped it completely. After the day she had had she wasn't sure if the universe was trying to curse her or if this was her reward. Rachel's eyes slowly slid over the form in front of her and bit back the tears that suddenly filled her eyes. Rachel took a small step forward and stopped, her knees threatening to buckle under her own weight.

"Q-Quinn?"

Quinn bit her lip and tried to remember to breathe as Rachel's eyes locked onto her own. She knew she should stop staring, that she should say any of the numerous speeches she had prepared. She should breathe before she passed out. But she couldn't move, couldn't make her mouth open, as she drank in the sight before her. She could see the exhaustion that clung to the smaller woman's frame, but there were a million other details that she took in, things that she hadn't noticed during their few short video chats.

Things like the small scratches that went from Rachel's wrist to her elbow, a hazard of her job she was sure. She could see how Rachel's hair was a slightly lighter shade, her skin just a little bit more golden after working for hours in the sun. She could see the glassy look in Rachel's eyes that told her she was nearing tears and she wanted nothing more than to cross the small distance that separated them to pull Rachel into her arms. The last observation finally pulled Quinn from her Rachel-induced stupor.

"Hi." Quinn kicked herself. Three months, thousands of miles, and a huge fight, and all she can come up with is 'hi'?

"I... I had this... I had words I was going to say. Lots of them. I uh, I wrote you a speech and I was going to beg for your forgiveness, and I still am. But I've forgotten the words. And the song -I practiced a song. And I, but, you, you're here. And look at you. Look at me! You've turned me into this bumbling idiot." Quinn couldn't stop her feet from moving forward, even if only to close the distance by a small bit. "I have so much I want to say to you, Rachel. So many things I need to tell you."

Rachel's bag slid down her arm and landed at her feet as she nodded and took another small step. "We really do have to talk."

"I know."

Rachel looked at Quinn for the first time in months and couldn't believe how much she wanted to pull the woman into her arms and never let her go. She had missed Quinn the entire time, she knew that without a shadow of a doubt; yet, she didn't realize until right this moment how visceral that feeling was. She needed to touch Quinn, to feel her arms around her and know that they were safe, that no matter what, they would be okay. It hurt her to keep her feet planted, to not run into the very arms that she so desperately needed to be wrapped around her.

Rachel sighed as she took a few steps and stopped again, warring with herself. They really did need to talk. But maybe, just this once, talking could wait. She knew she would eventually forgive Quinn and she knew the woman would do the same for her. And right now, she needed all of those things more than she needed a song or a big long speech.

Quinn saw the indecision on Rachel's face and nodded. She knew that there was a possibility that showing up here like this wasn't the best of plans, but it was all she had. She was desperate and needed to talk to Rachel, more than that she needed to see her, to hold her, to remember just what it was she was fighting so hard for. But Quinn didn't want to push the woman more than she had already been pushed. She could see the dark circles that Rachel tried to expertly hide under layers of makeup, but after all the time they had shared together, Quinn knew what to look for. Rachel looked exhausted, and nervous. She watched as Rachel began to fiddle with her hands, a sure-fire way to tell that the smaller woman was nervous or apprehensive.

Quinn bit her lip and dug her hands into her side to keep from reaching out and taking those hands into her own. She wanted to comfort Rachel, to tell her she had nothing to be nervous about, but the truth was; Quinn wasn't sure. She wasn't sure if she'd made the right choice coming here. And she wasn't sure where they stood at the moment. But she had tried, she had come this far. She just needed Rachel to take the last few steps, to let her know that she was wanted here, and she would do whatever it took after that to show Rachel just how sorry she was. But it seemed as if Rachel wasn't ready to bridge that gap yet.

Quinn nodded again to herself even as she heard her heart shatter into the silence that separated them. Coming here was a mistake, she realized that now. It was too soon, too much, and now she was going to pay the brunt of it by scraping together the remaining pieces of her broken heart to give Rachel the space she needed. Quinn took a fortifying breath and turned to walk away.

"I missed you!" Rachel's voice echoed through the empty space, dying away only to be replaced by the sound of Quinn's sigh as Quinn's feet stalled, half turned in her escape.

"I missed you too, Rae," Quinn said, quietly.

"Then please, don't walk away."

"If you need space," Quinn closed her eyes and brought her chin to her chest, trying to remind herself that she was the one who put herself into this situation, now she was just going to have to deal with the consequences of showing up here, "I can give you that. I'm… I'm not running," She admitted as she looked down. "I can't run from you even if I wanted to."

Rachel let herself smile a little about that. Quinn was here. Her Quinn, the love of her life, the most beautiful creature she'd ever seen, was here, in Paris, in the city of love. She was here because she missed her. Quinn Fabray, former HBIC, and one of the greatest tormentors of Rachel's young life was here to beg for her forgiveness. She was here because she loved her and wanted this, wanted them, to work out. Rachel couldn't stop the smile that slowly spread across her face nor could she keep the tremble from her voice as she called out Quinn's name softly.

Quinn shivered at the sound and felt her throat close as she felt the warmth of Rachel's body grow closer to her own. The light fragrance of Rachel's perfume that complimented Rachel's own natural scent so well wrapped around her and Quinn rocked in place as she fought the pull to lean back into the other woman's touch. Her skin tingled with the need to feel Rachel pressed against her. Her stomach clenched at the thought of strong arms wrapped around her waist. Quinn could feel her own breath catch in her throat as Rachel's breath ghosted across her shoulders. Quinn was certain her brain had turned to absolute mush knowing that Rachel was so close, so amazingly, excruciatingly close, but not touching her.

She wondered if Rachel could hear her pounding heart she was so close. Her pulse raced and her breath came in small gasps –a heady mixture of desire and nerves swimming through her system. Quinn wasn't sure what Rachel wanted from her but she knew she would give her everything if she would just touch her for only a second. Quinn would give anything to know that Rachel forgave her and still wanted her around. So many people had pushed her away or turned their backs and Quinn wasn't sure if she'd survive Rachel doing the same thing.

"Quinn?" Rachel watched as Quinn visibly shivered as her whisper washed over the sensitive skin on her neck. "Turn around."

Quinn's whole body shook as she slowly turned around, her breath leaving her body with a sigh of relief as she felt Rachel's hands take her own. She shivered again, this time from pure nerves, as Rachel lightly squeezed her hands before trailing her fingers up Quinn's arms to bury themselves in the soft hair at the back of Quinn's neck. Quinn instinctively moved closer and lightly placed her hands on Rachel's hips, still afraid to touch her.

Rachel stared into green eyes that were currently filled with fear, love, and hope, and gave her lover a small smile, "We still need to talk, about a lot of things, but I've missed you and I'm so glad you're here."

Quinn released a shuddered breath that was caught somewhere between a laugh and a sob as Rachel stepped into her body and wrapped her arms around her tightly. It took only a second her arms to slide around the small woman's waist to pull her closer.

"I'm not going anywhere," she promised as she buried her face into dark locks, inhaling the scent of vanilla and honey that seemed to cling to the woman wherever she went. Rachel's arms tightened around her neck as she nuzzled against it, kissing the soft warm skin behind her ear, before settling her head on Quinn's strong shoulder. Quinn laid her head gently on her lovers and both women sighed in contentment.

There was still a lot to talk about, a lot to get settled, but for the moment, both were okay to just bask in the feeling of being close to one another. Time passed though neither could find it in them to care. They could have stood there for minutes or hours as they both relished in the feeling of the other's arms wrapped around them. They were finally home.

Home. That's what this was. Here, with her arms wrapped around Quinn, her hands clutching at and the other woman's shoulder blades, her nose tucked into the crook of Quinn's neck. There were a million things they needed to say to each other, so much that they still had yet to deal with, but none of that mattered as they both held tightly to one another, neither willing to relinquish their hold. Rachel knew she wouldn't make the same mistakes she used to -pretending everything was okay as she had in the past but she was loathed to let go and face everything. With her head laying against Quinn's shoulder, feeling the woman burying her face into the crown of her head, she couldn't remember a time when she had ever felt as content as she did in that moment. Time passed though neither could find it in them to care.

It's been... like almost a year. Seriously, I know I suck. My best friend is visiting me right now and actively reminding me I suck. I suck worse because... well this chapter has been done for a while. And I am just now getting around to post it. On a good note -I have the next chapter about half done as well and am assured by those who have read it that it is one of the best in forever. Hopefully, I'll have it finished this weekend and off to my beta soon after. If heya8713 has any say in it it will be sooner! (btw to everyone who keeps asking her if I'm going to update -y'all make my day. I think that's hilarious!)

She had still been unsure of just what she would say or do when they were finally face-to-face until the moment she was pulled into Quinn's embrace. But the look of defeat that had clouded Quinn's eyes as she had turned to walk away was enough to break her own heart. She truly had missed Quinn -her snark, her humor, the feel of her arms wrapped around her in a way that made her feel everything the woman was. Quinn had come to her. She didn't just ignore the problem. Rachel wasn't sure what Quinn had planned to say or do, but she knew that just by her showing up, she was truly trying. Because of that and so many other reasons, Rachel knew whatever this rift was between them it would make them stronger in the end. They would work through this and anything else that came their way.

In that moment she needed and wanted nothing more than to be close to Quinn. Quinn, who made her laugh and want to sing again. Quinn, who was her best friend and the person she felt she could tell anything to. Quinn, who had flown halfway across the world to meet her in the most romantic city in the world just to seek her forgiveness. Quinn who clung to her as if they would both float away if she released her even for a moment. And it made Rachel's heart swell with love and devotion, unlike anything she had ever felt before.

Quinn willed herself to relax in Rachel's arms but she was so terrified of what was still to come. They had put off talking in order to hold one another. And it was okay. Better than okay even. It was what they needed. The warmth radiating from Rachel's small form seeping into her skin slowly soothed the fear and nerves that had plagued her since she'd first stepped into that conference room four days ago. Even so, Quinn had learned a long time ago that the longer things went without being talked about the harder they became to discuss and the more risk they had of hurting everyone involved. High school had taught her that lesson more than once. Yet, with each small puff from Rachel's lips against her neck, her body tensed with something other than the desire to talk. She could sense every inch of her body that brushed innocently against Rachel's. And the longer Rachel's breath brushed across her neck, the more aware she became of it.

Quinn licked her lips and took a deep breath, willing her heartbeat to slow and cursed her traitorous body. She knew now wasn't the time, not with all they still had to discuss. She really did have a speech prepared, a dozen of them if she was being honest with herself. Yet, she couldn't will her lips to work, to form words, or to break this moment. Instead, her lips tingled with the need to be pressed against the ones lightly brushing against her neck. 'That perfect blend of sexy and adorable that makes your heart flutter and your pulse race… like warm silk, soft and gentle… curves in all the right places.' Quinn couldn't suppress the small shudder that ran through her as she remembered what Rachel had said what kissing a woman felt like.

Rachel swallowed as she felt Quinn shiver and slid her arms around Quinn's waist to pull her closer.

There wasn't even a hair's breathe between them, yet it still didn't seem close enough. Pressed tightly against Quinn was the first time in weeks that Rachel felt like she could actually breathe. And with every breath came the essence that she had come to think of as home –something that was utterly and completely Quinn. She burrowed her nose further into the crook of Quinn's neck, trying to inhale as much of Quinn into her body as she could. She had missed Quinn, missed her beyond belief, beyond words. Her extensive vocabulary was rendered completely useless; in this moment, there were no words. As far as she was concerned, those words could wait forever as long as Quinn was content to hold her.

She hummed softly as her fingers spread wider, finding the soft skin where Quinn's shirt had risen up near the small of her back. She licked her lips softly as she traced lazy designs, softly raking her nails along the edge of Quinn's pants. Rachel nuzzled her nose against Quinn's long leonine neck, feeling her pulse beating strongly beneath her skin. She wanted to taste, to feel skin against her lips, to feel the beat thrum beneath her tongue. Without thought of her actions, she lightly brushed her lips against skin, skin so deliciously warm against her lips that it made her mouth water. Rachel's mouth lingered, flicking her tongue out to taste and feel Quinn's heartbeat beneath her mouth.

Quinn's breath froze in her lungs at the first phantom touch only for it to rush out of her as she felt Rachel's mouth descend on her pulse point firmly.

Rachel's hand's loosened around her waist, falling to cup her hips, her thumbs still dragging over sensitive skin. Her body flooded with heat even as she struggled against her body's reaction. "Rae? Ra-Rachel?" Quinn stuttered as she felt Rachel begin to suck on her neck in earnest. She could feel every slide of lips against her neck, every drag of Rachel's teeth against her skin, shoot down her spine, settling low in her belly. Her back still ached and she was afraid her knees would give out if she didn't stop Rachel soon. She blinked and swallowed roughly as many other reasons this wasn't a great idea streamed through her cloudy brain.

"I n-need you to stop before things g-go…" Quinn's words stuck in her throat as Rachel's hands began to slide beneath her shirt, lightly trailing up her sides as her mouth latching roughly onto her pulse point. Quinn couldn't stop the moan that ripped from her throat as thumbs deftly brushed against the sides of her breast.

Rachel hummed into Quinn's neck, hearing her pleas but they were a distant murmur. She was more tuned into what her mouth was doing and the reactions it was causing Quinn than what the woman was saying. Rachel smiled to herself as she felt Quinn lean into her more, felt the taller woman shiver again as she unconsciously tilted her head to the side, giving Rachel more access to do what she wanted. Quinn's arms loosened around her shoulders, only to have one slide into her hair and the other brace her upper arm, almost as if she was unsure if she wanted to push Rachel away, or pull her impossibly closer.

"Fuck! Rachel, please," Quinn huffed out, her hips canting forward unconsciously as Rachel nipped at her ear. She wasn't even sure what she was asking for any more. It had been far too long since she'd felt Rachel's touch and the woman knew what would bring her to her knees. Quinn took a deep breath and tried to remember what brought them here to begin with, but with every swipe of Rachel's tongue it became more difficult.

Quinn lightly tugged at Rachel's hair, pulling her away from her neck long enough for her to form a complete thought. "Rachel," Quinn panted, "we need to talk."

"We do," Rachel agreed as she flicked her tongue against Quinn's ear. She knew Quinn was right, they did need to talk. They needed to make things right, to talk about what had happened, and where they saw this going. They had so much on the line. The logical part of her begged her to put a bit of distance between them and listen to what Quinn had to say. But she missed Quinn, in more than one way, and she felt utterly delightful under her hands and mouth. Rachel's body ached with the need to touch and be touched, and it was drowning out any logic she could half-heartedly try to conjure up.

She smiled to herself as she listened to Quinn's soft whimper as she brought her lips to the sensitive spot behind the blonde's ear, stepping back and pulling the woman with her. Rachel nipped at Quinn's ear again. "We do need to talk," Rachel whispered into it, "but I need to touch you more. Let me touch you, Quinn."

Quinn groaned at the breathy words and cursed her luck. Rachel was usually the unwavering voice of reason with astounding logic when it came to most situations. Logic said they needed to talk. Logically, they should work through all of their issues before falling into bed together. It was the reasonable course of action. But reason and logic were quickly taking a back seat as Rachel did amazing things with her extremely talented mouth, making Quinn's knees quake and her mouth run dry.

Quinn swallowed roughly and tried to clear her head. She wasn't used to being the voice of reason –Quinn was now, and had always been, a slave to her impulses and that was the very thing that had landed them in this position to begin with. It was that notion that finally pulled her from the haze of lust and desire that Rachel had pulled them into. She didn't want to make the same mistakes she always had. Quinn took a deep breath and slid her hand from Rachel's hair, gently pressing against the smaller woman's arms until she could see her face, adorably knitted with confusion.

"I'm serious, Rachel. We need to talk."

Rachel sighed and took a small step back if only to clear her head enough to respond to Quinn. "I already agreed to that statement."

"What you were doing wasn't talking."

"No," Rachel said as she slid her hand over Quinn's collarbone, restraining her desire to lean forward and trail her lips against it, "what I was doing was much more enjoyable."

Quinn huffed in annoyance and stepped around her, back towards the living room she had vacated the moment she knew Rachel was there. She needed to step away, even if only to give herself room to breathe without Rachel's intoxicating scent filling her nose with each breath.

"Would you stop for just a minute and be serious about this? We have a lot that we need to work through, and jumping into bed isn't going to solve any of our problems."

Rachel's hands fell to her sides as she took a reaffirming breath slowly following Quinn further into the condo, "You're right, it won't."

Quinn looked up sharply at the abrupt change and stared at Rachel warily. She knew the look on her face; she'd seen it enough times in high school to know that Rachel wasn't going to give up. Part of her wanted to be angry for it, but the rest of her was too turned on by an aggressive Rachel Berry to let her anger take hold.

Rachel watched the heat spark in Quinn's eyes before the woman blinked it away and knew it wouldn't take much to convince her. Quinn was right, they needed to talk. And they would. But not before Rachel had her way with the beautiful woman she had fallen stupidly in love with.

Rachel cleared her throat and took a small step closer. "Let me ask you something," she waited until Quinn lifted an eyebrow in question, "everything that has happened? Do you think this is something we can work through?"

"I wouldn't be here if I didn't," Quinn said without hesitation.

Rachel stepped closer and took Quinn's hands in her own. "And I wouldn't have asked you to stay if I didn't believe that as well," she said softly as she once again began to walk slowly backward, pulling the woman with her. "Quinn, I fully believe that we will work through this. We will talk, I promise you we will."

Quinn nodded, wondering where Rachel was going both with her words and with her steps. Rachel was talking, but not in her normally verbose manner. She was saying what Quinn had hoped to hear, in a way, but each word was tinged in not-now-but-later. Sure enough, Rachel's next words confirmed her suspicions.

"But right now, I need you. I need you to touch me and kiss me and remind me just how much you love me. Just as I need to do the same to you, for you. I've missed you, Quinn. And if these last few days have taught me anything, it's that I want to fight for this."

Quinn sighed and pulled Rachel to a stop, "Rachel, you know I love you. And I've missed you, too. My life doesn't make sense without you in it anymore; which is why I don't think that we should ignore this."

Rachel huffed and dropped Quinn's hand, before taking a breath to center herself. She knew that Quinn's irritation came from both sexual frustration and from the need to actually work through things like a proper adult. She admired Quinn for it and loved her for it even more. But she was not going to be dissuaded. If Quinn needed words, needed to know that they would talk, she could do that.

"Quinn, I'm not suggesting that we jump into bed and forget about everything that's happened. I'm not. I want to talk about this. I need to talk about everything that's happened since I left for this shoot. I'm not suggesting that we ignore what happened. What I am asking for, what I need, " Rachel gave Quinn a small smile as she took both her hands into her own, "is to make love to the woman I am so desperately in love with. The woman I have been apart from for months. Months, Quinn."

Quinn couldn't help but smile at small whine but her breath caught at Rachel's next words. "Please, please don't make me wait any longer. I love you and I promise we will talk but right now, I think I need you more than I've ever needed anyone. I want to show you how much I love you. I want to touch you, to feel you fall apart under my fingers and my tongue, to taste you and kiss yo–" Rachel's plea was cut off as two soft lips pressed against her own.

"Then do it, Rachel. Make love to me," Quinn whispered against Rachel's lips.

Rachel growled at the words, pressing demanding lips against Quinn's. The kiss was desperate and hungry, a clash of tongues and teeth, and everything they both needed. Quinn couldn't help but melt completely into Rachel as the woman pressed her against the wall, not even realizing that either of them had moved. She loved how perfectly their bodies aligned, loving the feel of Rachel's hands on her, her own moving over Rachel's curves.

Quinn tore her mouth away, gasping for air as Rachel's mouth found its way back to her neck. "Rae?"

Rachel moaned as Quinn's hips canted forward as she nipped at her collarbone, trailing her lips down its length. "Mmhmm?"

"Rachel, please."

Rachel heard the plea in Quinn's words and leaned up, her lips dragging across Quinn's as she whispered into them, "What do you need, love?"

"Promise?" Quinn wasn't even sure what she was asking her to promise. She wanted her to promise they would talk. Promise they would work this out. Promise she would show her how much she loved her. Promise that she would never leave.

Rachel closed the minute gap between their lips, sucking Quinn's bottom lip between her own, tugging as she pulled back just far enough to breath out her answer. "Yes," Rachel said with such conviction that Quinn could do nothing but surge forward and capture Rachel's lips with her own.

Quinn ripped their lips apart, gasping as Rachel used the move to kiss her way along her jaw and down her neck. She gasped as teeth drug none too gently against her pulse point. "Then can we please go find a bed," Quinn pleaded even as she held Rachel to her neck, "because I don't think my legs will hold me up much longer."

Rachel chuckled as she stepped back and Quinn lost her breath again. Rachel's hooded eyes were almost coal black, flaming with desire. Her hair was disheveled from Quinn running her fingers through it as they kissed. Her cheeks and chest were flush with arousal and she was almost panting out her need. Quinn's self-control was at its breaking point, ready to take Rachel then and there, her back and neck be damned.

Rachel cupped her cheek and ran her thumb against Quinn's bottom lip, forcing her to hang on just a little bit longer. "I'm sure there is a bed in this place somewhere. Maybe we can find it together?"

Rachel couldn't take her eyes off of Quinn as they traversed through the suite, smiling each time that Quinn's eyes met her own. Neither paid mind to the room they'd found behind a set of double doors other than to make note that the room had a bed. The moment they'd stepped through the doors Rachel turned, pulling Quinn's arms around her shoulders, her own falling to Quinn's hips. The frantic need that had driven Rachel seemed to be tempered with the knowledge that they truly had time; that this wasn't the end, they weren't at their end. She wanted Quinn just as much as she had in the foray but now she also wanted to savor each movement, each taste; each and every touch. They both sighed softly as Rachel drew Quinn close enough for their bodies to brush against one another's.

Quinn melted into Rachel's embrace, running her hands up each side of Rachel's neck, gently bringing their lips together. She sighed as Quinn grazed tender kiss after tender kiss upon her lips, each kiss as soft as the first, each just as fleeting. The gentle kisses made Rachel's heart flutter even as she yearned for more contact. Quinn smirked as she felt Rachel rise to her toes as she attempted to deepen the kiss. Quinn playfully pulled back, only allowing their lips to barely brush against the others.

"Quinn," Rachel half breathed, half whined as she let her heels drop to the floor.

Quinn shivered; the sound of her name on Rachel's lips, sighed just so, just did something to her. Quinn stroked her thumbs across Rachel's cheeks as she pulled back and took in the woman standing in front of her. Rachel looked up at her with such open longing, her eyes dark and hooded with need, yet still, beneath the desire Quinn saw the love the smaller woman held for her. It made her breath catch in her throat and once again made her feel unworthy.

"Don't," Rachel whispered as she pressed her cheek into Quinn's palm, seeing the flash of regret and guilt that filled green eyes. "There's time for that later. Stay with me. Stay in this moment with me."

Quinn nodded and closed the gap between them. She realized as she softly flicked her tongue against Rachel's lips that maybe her diva was right; this was what she needed, what they both needed. They quickly lost themselves in the feel and taste they'd both missed out on over their forced separation. Quinn stopped holding back and let their passion inflame them both, burning through them until it threatened to suffocate them, both panting softly when they finally parted.

"I've missed you," Quinn sighed.

"And I, you," Rachel said softly as she plucked at the buttons of Quinn's blouse. "May I?"

Quinn licked her lips and nodded her assent. Her eyes fluttered closed as she felt delicate fingers worked at the front of her shirt, pausing every few moments to stroke against the newly exposed skin. Goosebumps spread across her skin, need settling low in her belly, making each of her nerve-endings stand on end and beg for attention. Quinn shivered, more from the feeling of Rachel's hands on her body than from the cold that flitted over her skin as her shirt slowly slid to the floor. She was content for a time to let Rachel undress her, sighing as silky lips dusted over her skin until she stood before Rachel completely bare.

They exchanged gentle kisses, both their lips and fingers unhurried as Quinn returned the favor, slowly peeling away each article of clothing, kissing soft skin before finding Rachel's lips over and over again. Both women moaned softly as heated skin met and hands and lips began to roam. Quinn shuddered with need as Rachel's lips traveled over the sharp edge of her collarbone, her hips canting forward with the slight nip of teeth.

"Please, Rae," she softly begged. Quinn gasped as Rachel's lips traveled higher, up her sensitive neck, and along the edge of her jaw before claiming her lips. The small diva walked them backward until Quinn's legs hit the edge of the bed. She watched as Rachel lifted her hand and gently pressed against Quinn's shoulder, silently willing her to move onto bed. She could do nothing more than nod, her eyes locked onto Rachel's as they both slowly crawled their way up the center. Quinn sighed happily Rachel slid up her body. Quinn couldn't look away from the absolute love and devotion that shown from Rachel's eyes as they both reverential touched, neither wanting to push things further than the gentle caresses they were exchanging. It was soft, and peaceful, and utterly overwhelming.

As Rachel stared into green eyes she felt as if she was truly looking into the other woman's soul. She could see her love and desire reflected back at her, but beneath that was Quinn's fear and vulnerability, her heart, and her devotion. And as Rachel cupped Quinn's chin in her hand, she silently promised to be gentle with all Quinn was giving her. Her lips lowered slowly to claim Quinn's as she settled her body against the naked one beneath her. They spent countless moments wrapped up in each other, in a series of never-ending kisses that were slow but filled with love and passion, each kiss becoming more intense than the one before it until they left them breathless and craving more.

"Rae," Quinn whispered as she raked her nails against Rachel's scalp. Quinn wasn't even sure what else she was going to say, her words falling away as she felt Rachel begin to move, content to just feel. Quinn let her eyes fall closed as she felt small hands dancing against her torso, her head falling against the headboard behind her as Rachel's lithe body slid over hers, feeling the small diva rise to her knees to straddle her lap. Quinn slowly opened her eyes as her hands lifted to settle on soft hips.

Rachel slid her hands up Quinn's shoulders, digging her fingers into soft, blond locks as she struggled to find words, wanting to say so much in that moment. She opened her mouth, but no words came forth as Quinn pulled her closer until they were touching from hips to sternum. Rachel licked her lips and took a breath, wanting to tell Quinn that she was sorry she let things go as far as they had. That she loved her unlike she'd ever loved anyone. That she never wanted this space between them again. Yet, the words floundered on her tongue.

"Shhh," Quinn whispered as she tipped her head up, nipping at Rachel's bottom lip. Rachel pressed her hips against Quinn's abs as the woman played with her lip with her teeth and tongue, stealing all the words she couldn't speak from her mind.

Her hands traveled over Rachel's back, worshiping every dip and muscle, loving the feel of the heated skin beneath her fingertips before letting one lift between their bodies. Rachel mewed softly as Quinn's fingers played over the top of her breast, sliding up her neck, scratching lightly against her skin. She sighed as Quinn cupped her jaw, tilting her head to allow her to deepen her teasing kiss. Quinn's tongue pushed passed Rachel's lips, twisting it to meet Rachel's, flicking against the roof of her mouth, passionately devouring every gasp and whimper that made it passed Rachel's lips.

Rachel shivered and pulled away to catch her breath, gazing down into Quinn's eyes, her own dark with desire and Rachel realized that sometimes words weren't needed. They gazed at each other for long moments, just taking each other, knowing the other woman was there and not going anywhere, regardless of all they had been through. Quinn's breath caught in her chest with the overpowering emotions that spread through her, so much overwhelming love for Rachel, so much need for the other woman. Not just physically but emotionally. Rachel was what held her together every day, through the good and the bad and she needed Rachel to know that, to understand just how much she meant to her.

Quinn bucked her hips and turned them, pressing Rachel into the bed, even as she bit her lip to keep from crying out, her back displeased with the move.

"Hey," Rachel panted as she ran her fingers through Quinn's wavy hair, "are you okay?"

"I guess I'm not as smooth as I sometimes pretend to be."

"You're perfect just as you are," Rachel assured her as Quinn as she rested her head on Rachel's shoulder.

Quinn snorted, "I'm not." Quinn pressed a small kiss to Rachel's shoulder to cut off any response before she lifted her head. She took a small breath to steady herself as she began to run her hands over Rachel's body, stopping to caress the soft curve of her breast. "Is this okay?"

Rachel's eyes searched Quinn's face as the woman held herself still, giving her all the time she needed before she whispered out one word. "Yes."

They both knew there was more to that one word than one syllable could convey. That word meant "Yes." It meant, "I love you." It meant, "I've missed you and I trust you." It meant, "I forgive you."

Quinn's lips pass over hers, soft and gentle, silently they whispered, "I'm sorry." They said, "I love you, too." They said, "I never meant to hurt you." They said, "I'm here." Just a brush of soft lips pressed against one another until Rachel's lips parted and the kiss deepened, turned desperate and passionate and everything that they both had been missing for so long.

"Q-Quinn," Rachel murmured into the kiss, soft, broken, needy.

The sound hit Quinn in her chest and she pushed closer, kissing Rachel with abandon, pulling away only to find more skin with her mouth. Rachel pressed her body into Quinn's as the woman ran her tongue along Rachel's neck, feeling the vibrations of her quiet whimpers and moans against her lips. The small singer released a shuddery sigh as her eyes flutter closed, swallowing roughly as Quinn peppering kisses across her neck, briefly pausing to suck softly at her pulse point before her lips trailed up to Rachel's ear. Rachel groaned as Quinn ghosted a kiss over the shell of her ear, sending shivers trembling through Rachel's body as she clung to the last bit of her sanity.

"I love you," Quinn whispered softly, "I will always love you," she promised, kissing the soft lobe again. Rachel squeezed her eyes shut feeling hot tears burning against her eyes, overwhelmed by the strength of the emotions flowing through her, the feeling of Quinn flowing over her. With her eyes closed, it felt as if Quinn was everywhere. Hands roamed over every inch of her body, lips caressing. She felt her in every breath she took, in every minute movement. Quinn worshiped her body, caressing every inch of her and Rachel couldn't stop the tears that slowly made their way from the corner of her eyes. Rachel gasped and her back arched off the bed as wet lips encircled her rock hard nipple, sucking at it gently; tongue swirling around the sensitive bud. Rachel cried out as tongue became teeth, tangling her hands in silky blond hair, holding Quinn captive at her breasts as her body writhed with need.

"Please," Rachel begged softly as her hips rocked up, trying to find friction to ease the ache that filled her, "Please."

Quinn raked her teeth over Rachel's nipple one last time before she slowly kissed her way lower. Rachel parted her legs willing Quinn to go where she needed her most, but Quinn's mouth lingered, mapping out with her tongue the sharp angle of Rachel's hipbone, tempered by her womanly curves. She curved her hand around the inside of Rachel's thigh feeling the powerful muscle flex beneath the grip of her fingers, resting just shy of where she knew Rachel was urging her to go. She didn't need Rachel's deep sigh to let her know how much the other woman wanted this, she could feel Rachel's need coating the smaller woman's thighs, she could hear it in her breathy gasp, smell it in the air around them.

Quinn licked the crease that joined Rachel's torso and thighs, knowing that it would drive the small diva insane, even as her fingers traced through the moisture that painted Rachel's thighs, sliding up towards the source. Rachel's moan was echoed by her own as warm, wet, heat met her touch, causing Quinn to bite down with desire as she ran her fingers through the silky wetness. Quinn leaned her head against Rachel's thighs as she watched her fingers play, slowly stroking up and down swollen pink lips. Fingers that spent long moments teasing before they dipped lower, slipping through Rachel's folds, pausing at her entrance. Her eyes moved up the length of Rachel's body to find her love's eyes pressed tightly closed, her neck arched and her lips pursed with every small pant. Her skin was flushed with arousal and her muscles were taut with need.

As Quinn's movement stilled, dark lust blown eyes sprung open and bore into her, making Quinn clinch her thighs at the inferno of desire that flared in them. "Please, Quinn, please. Don't make me wait for you any longer."

Quinn moaned at the plea and turned her head, nuzzling against the small patch of hair between Rachel's legs. Her tongue slowly moved up the length of her as two fingers slowly sunk inside, pulling out before sliding back into welcoming heat. Even with Rachel's words still ringing in her ears, Quinn kept her pace leisurely, wanting Rachel's pleasure to build slowly. Rachel moaned at the sensation, raising her hips to meet each thrust of Quinn's fingers. A groan ripping from her throat as Quinn flicked her tongue against Rachel's clit as she curled her fingers to press against Rachel's innermost walls. Rachel rocked steadily against Quinn's fingers and tongue, willing her to move faster but never wanting this moment to end just the same. Each movement steadily brought Rachel higher, closer to her peak, but it was never enough stimulation to completely push her over.

Rachel's mews became louder and more frequent as her hips bucked against Quinn faster and harder. Quinn recognized Rachel's movements were becoming desperate and knew drawing it out any longer would be cruel. She realized she didn't want to wait any longer. She wanted to see Rachel fall completely apart under her touch, her tongue. She slowly pulled her fingers out, ignoring the simpering whine that spilled from Rachel's lips as she gave her one final lick. She waited until Rachel's eyes were locked with her own before she sucked Rachel's throbbing clit into her mouth, filling her with roughly with three fingers, curling them as she stroked her hard and fast. It was just what Rachel needed to give her that final push. Quinn held on as hips canted forward and Rachel's back left the bed with a reverent cry.

Rachel cried out as she rocked steadily against Quinn's fingers and tongue, the feel of her so overwhelming and pleasurable. She held on, fingers digging into her shoulder as she rode out her orgasm before collapsing back in bed. Her body trembled with aftershocks as Quinn slowly kissed her way up Rachel's torso, soft moans still falling from her lips. As soon as she was close enough, Rachel threw her arms around Quinn and pulled her close, her tears falling in earnest. They remained like that, Quinn absorbing Rachel's soft panting and gentle moans as she slowly came down.

"Oh. Oh fuck," she whimpered into the crook of Quinn's neck as she held the woman close to her, loving the sensation of still being filled by her as she still clenched around Quinn's fingers. The feel of Quinn's breath against her neck was comforting as she felt her orgasm finally begin to cool. "Don't move," she pleaded even as her hips thrust up gently.

"I'm here, love," Quinn promised.

They lay silently in one another's embrace until Quinn could hear Rachel's heartbeat begin to settle. Only then did she slowly move her fingers out of the warm, wet embrace that still surrounded them. She hesitated for only a moment at Rachel's entrance before she gently pressed back inside, eliciting another shuddering sigh from Rachel's lips.

"Qu-Quinn?" Rachel half asked, half moaned as Quinn steadily moved her fingers slowly in and out of Rachel's warmth.

"Shh," Quinn whispered as she pressed her lips against Rachel's neck.

Rachel felt the wetness at her thigh and clenching her inner muscles around Quinn's fingers, getting wetter from knowing just how aroused Quinn was. Quinn sighed in relief as Rachel lifted her leg higher giving Quinn something to find purchase on as she slowly rocked her hips forward, digging her fingers deeper inside Rachel. Quinn shuddered from the small noises that escaped Rachel's mouth and began to rock her hips in earnest against the small woman's thigh.

Rachel was convinced that there was nothing better than the feel of Quinn touching her as the woman slowly pleasured herself against Rachel. Green eyes were screwed shut, her face filled with a look bordering between concentration and pleasure as she pressed herself harder against her thigh, fingers quickening in pace slightly. The need to touch Quinn, to satisfy her, began to overwhelm Rachel but she was loathed to move from where she was, the sight of Quinn rocking above her too great. She bucked her hips gently, giving her enough room to slide her hand between them, sinking between Quinn's legs.

Quinn groaned, her fingers moving faster within Rachel as Rachel tried to match her pace. The women soon found a rhythm, both rocking into the other's hand faster and faster. Sweat slid down Quinn's back with the effort it took to maintain, but she was so close.

"So, Rae, so good," Quinn groaned into Rachel's neck as she thrust her hips, riding Rachel's fingers with utter abandonment. Rachel could only moan in reply, wrapped in a haze of pleasure and touch, giving and taking in equal measures, moving with precise motions, hitting the spot inside Quinn that she knew would push her closer to the edge, wanting them to peak together. Rachel's back arched as Quinn pushed her thigh against her hand, the added pressure making her sob out Quinn's name.

"Mmmm, Quinn. M'so close," she slurred, her free hand jerkily finding purchase on the back of Quinn's neck, dragging her lips in for a sloppy kiss, more teeth and panting than passionate kissing.

"Come for me, love."

"With you, Quinn. With you," Rachel panted against her lips, pressing Quinn's forehead to her own as she felt herself on the edge of that precipice, knowing that any moment she would be spiraling off of it. Quinn continued her movements, increasing the roughness of them slightly.

"With you."

The words echoed through Rachel's body as she felt every muscle in her body stiffen, white hot heat erupting from her center, blinding her and making her head spin deliciously. Quinn's body stalled over her as she let out a shuddery cry, mouth open in silent ecstasy as she pressed down into Rachel's fingers as hard as possible. A choked moan escaped her as Rachel gently flicked her thumb over her clit before the smaller woman was seized with another wave of ecstasy. Rachel shivered with pleasure as Quinn shook above her and tried to remember to continue rubbing barely there circles over Quinn's hood as the woman convulsed in her still silent orgasm.

Quinn collapsed against Rachel with a whoosh of air, panting heavily as she recovered from the intensity of the orgasm. Quinn began to chuckle as she caught her breath. "Jesus, I'm going to regret that later."

"Worth it?" Rachel asked as she looked into smiling eyes. She pushed sweat-darkened hair from Quinn's brow, enjoying the feeling of the taller woman getting comfortable against her shoulder.

"Totally."

Rachel hummed in contentment as Quinn settled next to her, head on her shoulder, leg draped over her thigh. She ran her fingers softly over Quinn's back, silently vowing no matter what happened the rest of the day that she would make sure the woman soaked later to help reduce some of her pain. She smiled as she felt Quinn's fingers lightly dance over her stomach, tracing invisible patterns across her skin. They let the silence and cool air settle over their skin as they both became lost in their own thoughts and the feeling of the other woman next to them.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Rachel asked as she felt Quinn's fingers stall against her lower stomach.

"Hmm? Oh, I was just thinking that this day definitely didn't turn out how I thought it would."

"I'm sorry I ruined your plans," Rachel said softly as she began to lightly massage Quinn's neck.

"I'm pretty sure my lack of articulation started it," Quinn sighed. "I had all these things I wanted to say to you, but the moment I saw you, I forgot how to speak."

"I don't think I fared much better, mon chaton."

"You haven't called me that for a while."

Rachel hummed in agreement, "I haven't, but it seemed appropriate here."

"We still need to talk. Well, I need to talk, and I need you to listen."

"I can try."

Quinn lifted herself up onto her elbow and looked at Rachel. "No, Rae, I mean it. I need you to listen. I need you to," Quinn sighed and shook her head, "I need you to get dressed, because there is no way I am going to be able to get through this conversation with you looking so tempting."

Rachel smiled and ran her hand down Quinn's side, "I thought you liked me like this."

Quinn rolled her eyes before she rolled away from the devil herself, "You know I do."

Rachel shifted to her knees and crawled behind Quinn, leaning in close to her ear. "Que je sais."

"Oh no, no you don't," Quinn laughed as she swatted Rachel away and shot from the bed.

"No?" Rachel asked, mischief dancing in her eyes. She knew they had to talk, but a wound up Quinn was just too much fun to pass up. "Mais je ne peux pas vivre sans toi."

"The devil is tempting me, I just know it," Quinn whispered as she stared at the ceiling. "And they always said that I was the one with the evil streak." Quinn's eyebrow rose as she stared down the evil woman before her. "I don't know what you said, but no," Quinn growled as she turned to hide her smile as she caught Rachel wiggling her eyebrows.

"I'm going to one of the other rooms in this place to shower. Alone. Because you are incorrigible and you swore to me that we would talk. There is a lot that has happened in the last week or so that I need to tell you. And as much as I would love to fall back into that bed with you and let you whisper sweet nothings to me in any language you so choose, we," she moved her hand in the small space between them to indicate the two of them even as she stooped to pick up her things, "really need to talk first."

Rachel let her pick up her clothes before she stood up and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry for teasing you. I did promise, and I will stand by that promise, just please don't go."

Quinn looked over her shoulder and grinned, "I'm not going anywhere, Rae. I will be just down the hall."

"Why go down the hall when there is a perfectly good en suite right here that we can share?" Rachel huffed and leaned her head against Quinn's shoulder. "Fine, but after we've sorted everything out, we're not leaving that bed for anything other than food."

Quinn chuckled. "You mean not even to experience the city of love?"

"The city will always be here."

"And so will I."

Rachel rocked her head from side to side, not wanting to acknowledge Quinn had a point. "I can experience all the romance I need to within these four walls for the next few days. After that, well, I guess we can make things up as we go along."

Quinn smiled to herself at Rachel's petulance. If anyone had told her back in high school that Rachel would be an insatiable lover she would have probably laughed at them. Then again, if anyone had told her back in high school that she would be Rachel's lover, she probably would have made that person's life a living hell.

"Go shower," Rachel sighed as she pushed Quinn towards the door. "I'll do the same. Alone. Just as I have for months, Quinn. Months."

"Don't you start with me," Quinn said as she stepped around Rachel, kissing her shoulder as she passed. "You've survived taking a shower alone for months Rachel. You can survive one more day."

By the time that Rachel had finally emerged from her shower, she could hear soft jazz playing from the living room and could smell something tantalizing wafting through the air. She walked softly down the hall, smiling as she saw a table pulled before a bay window with the city sparkling in the distance. Even more stunning than the view was her lover leaning against the sill, a glass of wine in hand.

"God, I've missed you."

Quinn started and looked over her shoulder with a smile. "Hello, beautiful."

"What's this?" Rachel asked as she pointed to the small table filled with containers of food and an open bottle of wine.

"I don't know about you, but I deal with emotional conversations better on a full stomach."

Rachel lifted a shoulder, "Emotional conversations usually cause my stomach to turn." Rachel hesitated as she slid her fingers across the table top as she walked around it. "Is that what this is going to be? An emotional conversation?"

Quinn took a fortifying breath. "I… Rachel, you know how hard it is for me to apologize, even if I know I am in the wrong. And I was in the wrong." Quinn took a sip of her wine as she tried to parcel out what she wanted to say, thankful that Rachel was giving her a chance to gather her thoughts. "I wasn't sure if you had eaten. I hadn't really been up to eating the last few days. I… I've been a bit nervous about seeing you," Quinn admitted softly. "This is probably not something we should talk about over an evening meal, but we promised to talk, and I have so much I want to say to you, to tell you."

Rachel reached out and took Quinn's free hand into her own, lacing their fingers together. "This smells fantastic and I've just realized I am starving. We can still talk, still reconnect while we enjoy the food and company, and if anything comes up while we eat and we're not too uncomfortable talking about it at that moment, then we'll do so. If not, we can shelf that part of the discussion until we've had our fill."

Quinn nodded and gave Rachel a relieved smile, "Okay."

"Good, because I really would like to hear more about what you've been up to these last few weeks without me," Rachel said as she slid into one of the chairs that Quinn had pulled in front of the window for them to share their meal together.

"Oh, now it's weeks. Before it was months, Quinn, months!" Quinn teased as she poured Rachel a glass of wine and set her food in front of her with a flourish. "I can guarantee that this isn't the best that Paris has to offer, but it was the first place I found with decent reviews and a good vegetarian menu."

"It looks wonderful, Quinn. Thank you for thinking of this. I really am quite hungry," Rachel admitted as she dug into her dinner.

Quinn smiled to herself as Rachel ate with gusto and leaned over to pick at her own food. She was honest when she said she hadn't had much of an appetite over the last week and even now the looming conversation held more of her attention than the food before her did. It must have shown on her face as she felt Rachel's hand slip over hers.

"Quinn, please try to eat. Especially if you're going to be having wine." Quinn nodded and picked up her sandwich and took a bite, relaxing just a bit as Rachel smiled at her. "If I wasn't vehemently against the consumption of animal flesh I would venture to say that actually looks tasty."

"You sure I can't convince you to taste the delicious charred bovine tissue, topped with béarnaise sauce and a hearty conglomeration of sautéed summer vegetables?" Quinn asked, dangling her sandwich over the table, eyes dancing with mischief.

"You're lucky that I have not eaten because the words 'delicious' and 'charred tissue' should never belong together in my presence. How can you even eat that knowing what it was?"

Quinn pulled her sandwich back towards her mouth and shrugged. "Because it tastes good."

"Animals used to use that tissue to walk, to move, to procreate."

Rachel smiled in triumph when Quinn looked down at her sandwich and screwed up her face. "Lovely, Rae. I thought you wanted me to eat."

"I do," Rachel smirked as she took a bite of her pasta. "I just want you to eat wisely. Our bodies are meant to be a temple and we should only put the very best into it. Red meat is horrible for your body."

"Just looking out for me?"

Rachel smiled and nodded. "Always."

Quinn shook her head, "I'm still eating this."

"And I will still remind you on a regular basis that what you eat is important."

"Duly noted."

"So, tell me about things at home."

Quinn nodded and filled her in on what little had happened since she had been gone. Which was practically nothing up until the last two weeks. Rachel listened and filled Quinn in on what it was like to film on location, complaining loudly about the amount of sand that would always end up trailing her back to her apartment each night. Both women deftly navigated around anything that would possibly bring up what had happened, silently agreeing to hold off on the topic until they'd finished their meals.

"Daddy always said that a healthy appetite is the best seasoning. I have to agree because though you may have said that it wasn't the best Paris had to offer, it was quite tasty."

Quinn hummed into her glass, surprised that she had not only finished her steak sandwich but her fries as well. "Should we take this conversation somewhere more comfortable?"

Rachel nodded and the two women rose and made their way to the couch, curling up next to one another. "Is this okay?" Rachel asked as she leaned into Quinn's side, her legs tucked under her, one hand draped across Quinn's thigh while the other held her wine glass.

"Perfect." Quinn was glad that Rachel had picked a position that didn't demand eye contact, yet let them remain in the comfort of each other's arms. "I… I would like to ask you for something."

Rachel lifted her head from where she had settled it against Quinn's shoulder. "Anything."

"Would you be willing to tell me again what happened between you and that woman the night I lost it?"

"I would but may I inquire into why you would want me to tell you again to begin with. As you said, the last time I did, you went too far and…"

Quinn placed her finger gently over Rachel's lips, knowing if she let her continue that they would be here all night and she really did want to get this conversation on with. "Humor me? Please? I know I was irate the first time you told me, and I didn't take the time to fully hear you out. I would like to know, not because I am angry or jealous, but because I am curious. I want to know how big of an ass I am."

"You're not an ass." Rachel's eyes flashed when Quinn's mouth opened to argue. "You're not. You might have made an asshole comment, but that doesn't make you one. You are simply a woman who made a mistake and is trying to remedy that. But to answer, yes, I would be willing to tell you what happened that night if you are sure it won't end up in anger or jealousy."

"I can't promise I won't be jealous. Rachel, those women got to spend time with you that I couldn't, attempted kisses or not."

"Hmm, well I guess I can understand that. I hated that April got to hang out with you the last two months while I'll was stuck there alone." Rachel sipped at her wine before she sat forward and placed it on the coffee table. "The cast and crew were amazing. The days were long and hard and, of course, I was missing you. But I made a few friends. Camilla, Camie, was one of the local Production Assistance who I worked closely with. She was there to offer a comforting word or a smile when I needed it, which I appreciated. She knew I was, for lack of a better term, bummed out over not talking to you for almost two weeks and she invited me over to a dinner her and her roommate, Alejandra, was having. It was just a bunch of people sharing food and enjoying a few drinks.

"Cammie is sweet, mostly quiet, but easy to talk to. As was her roommate, Alejandra. We spent the evening chatting about musicals and arguing with another of their friends about literature. I didn't even realize that she had been flirting with me for most of the night. I just assumed she was loud, friendly, and not afraid of human contact. She comes from a completely different culture than we do so I just assumed it was how she was raised," Rachel shrugged.

"So I didn't think anything about it when I slipped out onto the balcony to get a bit of air and she approached me. Before I knew what was happening, she was leaning in. She stopped as soon as I asked her to, I told her I was happily in a relationship, and she asked who the lucky woman was. About that time Camie came out and begged to hear more about you as well."

"And then I called and ruined everything." The silence that surrounded them spoke the truth of the statement.

"I want to begin by apologizing. I should not have lost control of myself like that. Knowing the whole story, which is almost exactly what you tried to tell me that night, I guess is flattering, in a way. To know you not only turned her away but to speak of me afterward? I'm sorry I let my anger and jealousy and hang-ups get the better of me. There is no excuse for it."

"But why?" Rachel sat up and looked imploringly at Quinn. "I guess that's the thing that has bothered me the most. I didn't understand what happened. I didn't think I had ever given you a reason to doubt me or to question my faithfulness. From my point of view, we were fine. We were in a good place. Don't get me wrong, I understand that we hadn't been able to see each other face to face for a while, but I tried to make sure I connected with you at least once a day, even if I was beyond exhausted. It just… it seemed to come out of nowhere."

Quinn sighed and looked down at her lap. "I… I am in no way excusing my behavior or what I said. It was and is inexcusable. Even as the words left my mouth I knew it was a mistake. Honestly, it was probably a mistake to call you at all that night."

Quinn froze as she looked up and saw the pain that shot through Rachel's eyes at that. "Please, let me explain. There is a reason I shouldn't have called you."

Rachel nodded and squeezed Quinn's hand. "Okay," she said roughly, trying to speak around the lump in her throat. She nodded to herself before she spun around on the couch, laying her head onto Quinn's lap.

Quinn smiled down at her as she shook her head. If it made Rachel more comfortable she would refuse her nothing, even if this was the oddest way she had ever held a serious conversation.

"I hadn't really talked to you in days and nothing I did seemed to break me out of my funk. I tried taking pictures or going surfing or calling up friends to meet for lunch or dinner -none of it mattered though because I missed you and my insecurity reared its nasty head and I started questioning if you missed me at all. You would text sporadically, but it wasn't… I feel like a clingy, codependent, ass -but it wasn't enough."

"Honestly, that's on me, not you, and I'll come back to that. But the point is; my fears and jealousy grew every hour that passed that I didn't hear from you. And I hated it. I hated that I felt like that, that I was clingy, and jealous, and…" Quinn stopped and blew out a heavy breath.

"I'm sorry you felt like that."

"I'm not. As much as I hate that we fought, I am almost glad we did because it's made me face up to a lot of things I would never have otherwise."

"What do you mean?"

"The night before I called you, I just needed someone to talk to, so I called up Frannie," Quinn smiled down at Rachel as the woman wiggled with happiness at that thought. "She made me realize that a lot of what I was feeling went back to how we grew up as kids. You know a little bit of my family history, the issues I have had with both of my parents, but did you know that my father cheated on my mother on a regular basis?" Rachel shook her head slightly, sighing quietly as Quinn's hands found her hair.

"He did. It was the well-known family secret. We grew up thinking that was normal. That no one could be trusted and that everyone had a hidden agenda. My sister ended up marrying someone just like Daddy for that exact reason. She said in an abstract way that she knew it wasn't right but we had been taught to pretend that everything was okay."

"So I had all of this still rattling around my head when I called you. I had all my jealousies and my issues and I let it get the better of me." Quinn swallowed roughly, feeling her eyes begin to fill with tears she tried to blink away. "I lashed out and I took it out on you."

"Oh, Quinn." Rachel reached up and gently placed her hand on her love's cheek.

Quinn held it there, even as she shook her head. "No, I messed up. None of that excuses what I did." Quinn's eyes slipped closed. "I can't keep lashing out when I'm upset or uncomfortable. It's not okay."

Quinn opened her eyes and looked down into the two caring brown eyes staring up at her. "Which is why I've started going to counseling. One day we're going to be married and have kids and I don't want them to ever have to feel like they aren't loved. And that means I have to learn to deal with my issues so I don't lash out at them or you like this ever again."

Rachel's eyes filled with tears the moment Quinn admitted she was trying to get help. She never expected it from Quinn but she knew it was a step in the right direction. Yet, it was the reasoning behind it that made a sob catch in her throat.

Rachel sat up, wanting to see Quinn's eyes, see her face, as she processed what she had just said. "You, you see us… married? Kids?"

Quinn's eyes shot up as she registered the astonishment and awe those words held. She smiled softly as she ran the back of her fingers across Rachel's cheeks, wiping away her tears. "Where did you see this going, Rae? I love you and I meant it when I said I was in it for the long haul. And that means doing whatever I have to to make this right and to make sure something like this never happens again."

"Oh, Quinn, this isn't going to be the only time we fight. As long as we can talk it out, every time, then we can make it through almost anything." Rachel sighed, "And that's where I messed up. I shut you out. Instead of talking to you, or trying to find out why you'd lost it the way you had, I cut off all forms of communication. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me for that."

"I can if you can find it in yours to forgive me for losing it and accusing you of cheating. I know, Rae, I really, truly do know that you would never. I should have talked to you about what I was feeling instead of trying to bury it."

"And I should have tried to keep in contact more so your insecurities wouldn't have had a chance to run wild." Rachel leaned in and softly kissed Quinn's lips. "I am so proud of you for going to get some help. And I am more than willing to go with you anytime you need."

Quinn nodded, "I think I need to focus on my stuff for a while, but if I think it's needed I'll tell you."

Rachel nods and they rested together quietly for a moment.

"I've missed you," Quinn said for what seemed like the thousandth time that evening.

"And I you, mon chaton."