Author's Note: It has been a while since I've updated, in fact the last time was last year (OOOOPSSSSSS) So I thought I would take another stab at this fic. Hopefully I don't do too badly. Tell me what you think!

February 2015.

New York

"How do you do this every week?" Halstead asked, directing his question over to Nick Amaro. Nick looked at him with a shake to his head. He honestly had no clue how to respond to that question. He didn't enjoy the violence, or the assaults. He didn't enjoy the facts and figures of their sex crime cases. He felt sick every time he came across a new case, yet there he was every day going to work and doing the best he could.

He thought about it for a moment, his fingers moving away from the keyboard he had been hovering over. "I don't do this every week, we all do. It would be too much if I took all the burdens from this job. We all get through it together and take home the good, and leave the bad at the office. It's the only way you can survive." He told the Chicago based detective. He liked the guy, or he was beginning to at least. Over the last year they've had several opportunities to work alongside each other, but he's never taken the time to talk to Jay like this before.

Jay nodded his head and gave Nick a sympathetic, yet understanding smile. He mightn't deal with sex crimes every day of the week, but he dealt with crime. The brutality and the cruelty that he's witnessed over the years is something he can't just ignore. The feeling of knowing that he couldn't save everyone would kill him if he didn't block it out of his mind every chance he got. Nick was the same; he didn't like knowing that there were people out there he couldn't save, people he didn't save.

"We've got a lead." A small voice came from behind the pair. Jay tilted his head as he looked back over at Erin who was already watching him. Things had been awkward the past few days, and they hadn't been given a chance to talk it over, their eyes ghost over each other's like they were looking but not really seeing. Erin wanted to express a thought, any thought but she didn't. Her eyes swooped towards Nick who had already grabbed his coat.

"Guess it's you and me today." She told him with a smile. It made sense considering he knew this city like the back of his hand, when Erin still struggled to figure out what block they were actually on. She smiled as Jay watched the pair walking out towards the door. They'd have time to talk later, she thought as she caught one last glimpse of her partner; plenty of time.

"What's it like for you anyway?" Erin questioned as they sat in Nick's car. They had been talking all the way across town trying to keep track of their newest suspect. So far he'd been in and out of three different buildings completely oblivious that he's been watched the whole time.

"With me and Amanda?" He questioned, already knowing where this conversation was headed. He's been there, in Jay's position, falling for someone you work with is never easy. Especially not when she's so closed off and unwilling to admit how she's feeling most of the damn time; he knows what it's like to be stuck in between wanting someone to open up, and not wanting to push them to do so. It's a challenge for love that he knows all too well.

Erin simply nodded her head and gave him a wary smile. She's never done this before, never let anybody in. She's had boyfriends who were more accurately 'casual partner'. She just doesn't know how this works. Jay's constantly being the type of man that every woman deserves, but she doesn't feel like every woman, she feels less than and that's her problem.

"I don't want to screw it all up." She said with a shaky sigh. She knew that this was the worst possible time to be confiding in someone, especially when they were in the middle of a heavy case. She was scared of what this might mean, finally saying it out loud.

"You're not going to screw anything up if you don't let yourself have the chance to see how it goes." Nick pointed out, which was a fair point. His hands gripped at the steering wheel as je diverged into a stream of steady traffic. He cursed out as a taxi pushed it's way in front of them, pushing them further away from the suspect they were trailing.

"I'm going to screw him up, he's this genuine guy who does nothing but try and do the right thing all the time. He doesn't need damaged goods like me, he just doesn't need the hassle of a broken heart." She admitted, resting her hand up against the window. She was trying to milk up the sun that had poked it's head out, the rays were hitting the side of her window and she was loving the tiny hope for warmth as she spoke. Her mind was flooded with that conversation at the airport, the one that had brought on all of this guilt. She wasn't trying to hurt anybody, or lead them on. All she wanted was to protect. Protect her city, her people, and herself.

Her phone began to chime, and she instantly answered the call. It was Voight and he sounded urgent. "There's been another victim." He told her, and Erin's heart dropped. She looked toward Nick, who was already glancing over at her.

"Where are we headed?" She questioned without any hesitation. She had to keep her head in her work, to save the women of this country, to protect any future victims. There was no time for her to be worried about her relationship with Jay.

"Halstead and Rollins are already on the scene, I need you back here we just booked another suspect."

Erin relayed Voight's exact words to her New York partner, Nick immediately turned the car around and flashed his sirens, they were going to catch this bastard, he was determined.

When Jay walked into the hospital with Amanda Rollins by his side, he didn't know what to expect. All of the previous victims hadn't made it out alive, but there they were ready to talk to a very live young lady who says she's been attacked. Jay had his doubts about this all being related, he figured that this poor girl had been attacked, and this had nothing to do with their case. He had voiced his concern to Amanda on the ride over, but the blonde had simply disagreed with him.

She's seen too many cases to know that when there were coincidences, you shouldn't ignore them. Maybe Jay was new to this game, but she definitely wasn't. She's been around this table one too many times. She held up her badge as they walked in without so much as a glance from the officers guarding the door.

"Hey uh Halstead, how about you sit this one out. I think this vic would be more comfortable talking to me first up." She told the Chicago man softly. Jay didn't know what to say or do for that matter. This was her territory and he didn't want to go against her orders. He simply nodded his head and stepped away from the door.

"Call me in if you need me." He told her sincerely, giving her arm a light squeeze from where he stood. Amanda simply nodded her head before her blonde hair disappeared behind the door.

"Noelle? I'm Amanda, I'm with the NYPD." She told the young lady who was laying up in a hospital bed. The girl was pretty, gorgeous in fact and Amanda figured many men thought so too. She walked over and stood beside the bed.

"I work in this unit called the special victims unit..." She continued upon realising that this girl didn't want to respond. "You don't have to talk to me right away, but I want to help you. I want to help other victims just like you." She kept talking and talking until a sob left the young girl's lips. Amanda felt her face soften as she looked across at the crying girl, her face was bruised, and her hair was bloody. Amanda didn't know if this was any better than not surviving an attack like this, the knowing, the remembering, the trauma. She'd prefer to be dead.

"I didn't do it. I didn't do what he said I did. You have to believe me." Noelle managed to squeak after calming herself down completely. Amanda wasn't sure how she recognised Noelle at first, until their eyes met for the first time.

Olivia Benson was standing beside Voight with her arms crossed over her chest. Fin had just pulled out a phone and was scrolling through a series of recent news articles. "Noelle Sweeny, 22, actress; her and her fiancé have been battling it out publically for weeks. He says she's sleeping with his best friend but she's been denying it, until a video was uploaded last night." He explained to the two sergeants. Olivia and Voight exchanged a look between them before Voight gave Fin the nod to continue.

"What did she say after that?" Olivia questioned, wanting to piece together an accurate idea of what they were actually dealing with here. She's never heard of this girl before, but there were so many young actresses in the tabloids that you couldn't blame her for that.

"Nothing, our perp got to her before she had a chance to defend herself." Fin said with a shake of his head. His voice was filled with a dim anger and a fiery frustration. This guy was sick, he was so sick for everything he's been doing and it was taking a toll on everyone involved. There was a girl laying in hospital after being raped and beaten, and left to die, a girl that didn't deserve this no matter what her infidelity sucked. She was a human who made mistakes; but this was no mistake somebody was out there, out for blood.

"What did he say you did?" Amanda questioned as Noelle finished wiping away her tears. The poor girl was so distraught, and Amanda almost felt heartless for prompting her to keep talking. Noelle was one of those girls who started her career very young. She was one of those child stars who never stopped sparkling, she was charisma, charming and cheeky according to every review of her performances. She was not this girl right there laying in a tear soaked hospital gown, sobbing until her face was red raw. This wasn't the Noelle the world knew; this was just a girl, just a very scared and broken girl.

"It's okay; you don't have to tell me right away. Take your time." Amanda told her, handing over a box of tissues she had taken from the bedside table. Noelle shook her head and looked at the tissues in her hands. She was piecing together her memories like a puzzle, trying to remember what came first.

"I didn't cheat on anybody. He said I cheated, he said I was a dirty whore who needed to be punished." Her voice trembled almost as hard as her hands were shaking. She didn't know how to conduct herself at a time like this. All the media training she's gone through over the years couldn't help her now. She was showing raw emotion, she was showing her pain and that's all she could do. "He tore my dress and pushed me into the wall, my head hit something and started bleeding, and I screamed out at him to stop touching me. He liked that and started pushing down my underwear, he was so sweaty and disgusting, I remember his fingers being as thick as sausages, and his breath smelled like cigarettes. It was making my asthma flare up, I couldn't breathe as he climbed on top of me." She was telling the story in drips and drabs, leaving out things because they weren't coming into her mind, she'd stop and start to correct herself, an apology every time.

Amanda listened very carefully, even after she'd told her all the details, Amanda could tell that she was telling the truth. This was no act at all. She walked over to the door and opened it, Halstead stood in the doorway and looked over at the young actress laying in the bed across by the window. He gave her a small smile before looking over at Amanda. "Voight wants a full report." He told her, nodding his head politely.

Amanda nodded her head before walking away. She stopped and looked back at the man with an emotionless expression on her face. "I report to Benson, not Voight." She told him before walking away yet again.