A/N: I am sorry this is ending. This will be the final chapter, and hopefully it will be enough to end it on a high note.

*A Girl's Best Friend*

Tex let out a sigh as she flipped over the final black card. "Great. Now I have to be the judge for the last round. Fuck." South looked over, turning slightly red at the card. "Oh my…"

North looked over as well, joining his twin. "What is it?" He read it silently, hanging his head afterwards. "I think we can end it on a high note." Tex chuckled and read it for the other Freelancers. "What is a girl's best friend? Guys, make this one count. Wash, come out of your stupid corner already."

The black/gold Freelancer took his seat, looking at his remaining hand of only one card. "A girl's best friend is expecting a burp then vomiting on the floor." He shook his head, ashamed of his choice. "That was so awful…"

North slapped his friend on the back as he threw his last card out. "Don't worry. Mine is sort of worse. A girl's best friend is Daddy issues."

"Doesn't everyone have that?" York pointed out, earning a sharp series of hisses from Maine. The big Freelancer threw his out, and York burst out laughing. "Fuck! Maine!" He nearly fell out of his seat from laughing so hard. North got up to read it, curious as to what could possibly make the tan Freelancer laugh so hard. "Wait, let me read it…"

He read it, and he too started to laugh. "Oh fuck…how did you get this card Maine? That's perfect!" He wiped his eyes before reading it out loud. "A girl's best friend is my vagina."

All of the Freelancers laughed, patting the big Freelancer for his entry. "Holy shit…Maine, you are officially the champion at this horrible game for horrible people."

Maine bowed, kicking his equally large feet onto the desk, although York shook his head. "Maine, if you do that, I think the table might break. You're not exactly a small guy, you know."

Wyoming nudged CT, who was STILL reading her Fifty Shades of Grey. "You know what they say about big feet, right?" North and Wash began chortling as CT didn't bat an eyelid or look away from the smut. "Big socks."

The British Freelancer's jaw dropped as he heard the blunt and very bored reply. "Are you kidding me right now?" Wash and North each slapped him on the back. "Sorry Wy. I think she wins this round." Wyoming let his head sink in defeat, tossing out his last white card. "Oh whatever. A girl's best friend is surprise butt-sex."

CT shook her head in mock disgust, continuing to read her book. "I wouldn't have thought you were into anal. That's a bit of a surprise." Again, North and Wash snickered at Wyoming's defeated expression. "Cheer up, Wario. You should know by now that you don't ever win a debate with a woman. Either she wins or you lose."

The British Freelancer gave the duo the middle finger, his eyes annoyed. "Go fuck yourself." Wash replied with a slightly sarcastic comment. "My dick doesn't touch my ass, though."

"That's because it doesn't exist," Tex snarked back at him, making the black/gold Freelancer walk into his Corner of Shame with his head low. "I'll just go over here…"

Carolina huffed in annoyance as she tossed her last card out, seemingly bored. "A girl's best friend is…jerking off on an unconscious friend's feet. What the fuck was I thinking when I played this card?" York let out an amused grunt. "I dunno. Maybe you have a strange foot fetish of some kind?"

The redheaded Freelancer shot her grappling pistol at York, but it seemed to have a magnetic pull to Wash's crotch, and it stuck to him instead. Despite the fact that Wash was behind Carolina, defying all kinds of logic. He let out a cry of surprise as he was pulled into the table, slamming into it with a horrible crash. He held his head in pain, trying to remove the grappling hook from his codpiece. "Ow…why me!?"

North patted his friend on the back, helping remove the device from his crotch. "It's because you're the second worst fighter." Wash looked up, still dazed from the impact. "You really think I'm the second worst?"

"No, you're easily the worst," York snorted. He fell on his side after Tex punched him in the head, making Wash look at him on the ground. "You were saying?" He too fell on the ground after Tex punched him as well, the two men grumbling in pain.

York sat up, holding his head as he threw his last white card onto the table. "A girl's best friend is shitting out a perfect Cumberland sausage." North and Wash (after he got up) exchanged glances. "I'm not too sure that one's possible…"

"I dunno. Maybe it's like when you eat corn. Ever notice that you can chew the living hell out of it, and yet it still comes out of your asshole reassembled?" North pointed out, earning several stares from the rest of the Freelancers. York broke the silence, voicing everyone (apart from CT's, as she was blushing as she read a certain scene in her book) else's thoughts. "I don't think any of us look at our own shit. That's really disgusting, bro."

The purple Freelancer slumped in his chair, hanging his head. "I should just stop talking…" Wash nodded in agreement, sitting back up with a large bruise on his head. "Yes, you should. CT, you're up."

The quiet Freelancer looked up briefly to toss her last card out, seemingly bored. "A girl's best friend is fingering." Maine let out a deep growl that could either be interpreted as amusement or annoyance at a card nearly as good as his. "Grr."

CT looked over at Wash, still holding his temples. "Care to translate what the fuck he just said?" Wash snickered, shaking his head. "CT, I don't think you believe this…but the big man thinks that you have plenty of experience with that one."

Maine hissed at the black/gold Freelancer, pointing. Wash let out a sigh, walking away. "I know, I know. Corner of Shame." He was starting to spend a lot of time in the Corner of Shame; at this rate, it was going to be called the Corner of Wash. CT began to glower at the big Freelancer, who shook his head and hissed again.

York snickered at the outburst. "Don't worry CT. He didn't actually say that. Wash is just an asshole."

"And the worst fighter," North added, smiling as his friend gave him the middle finger from his corner. "Fuck you."

Florida let out a small cough, getting everyone's attention. "Thank you. A girl's best friend is that weird yaoi smut featuring the Master Chief and the Arbiter." (A/N: This is a thing!? WTF!?)

Wyoming and CT looked at each other, their eyes closed. "That exists? What the fuck?" South, who had yet to go, folded her arms across her chest as she leaned back onto Tex. "Rule 34 of the Internet. If it exists, there's porn of it. Rule 35: if there isn't porn of it, porn will be made of it."

Tex bit down on South's neck, making her squirm. "Chomp~." South blushed, wriggling a bit. "Tex!" She threw out her last card, everyone empty. "A girl's best friend is shoving a cork up your ass."

North pointed to the Corner of Wash, snickering. "That explains a great deal with him." Wash responded by chucking his helmet, making the purple Freelancer duck. "Asshole."

Tex sat up, although with South in her lap that proved to be a bit of a struggle. "The winner is…fuck, I don't want to say it was Maine, but I mean come on. Who else could beat that?"

No one seemed to want to argue, partially because they knew Maine was the best one nearly every round, and because it was too damn late and they had major training the next day. South got off of Tex, putting the cards back in the box and throwing them into the Corner of Wash. The gold/black Freelancer looked down at the box. "Do not mention what we spent four hours doing to the Director. He'll kill us. Agreed?"

"Agreed," all the freelancers chanted back in a bored tone, getting up and going to their dorms (apart from Wash) quietly. As the last Freelancer (Wash) left, a figure in a dark suit came into the room, picking up the box. "So…they did play it after all. I think I must give South some credit."

Laughing, the Director walked out of the room, the box of cards in his hands.

A/N: Well….it's been a fun ride, and I can't thank you all enough. I'll be continuing both The Real Allison Church and Agent Reach a bit more often, so look out for those two fanfics. See you!

Little Dragon-kun