Hello lovelies,

Thank you so much for all the love. I want to apologize for my previous chapter, as when I reread it, realized I made a huge booboo and wrote Lucy instead of Abby. I am a moron and humbly ask for your apology. It is fixed now.

I know I say this everytime, but I truly appreciate the reviews. I had such a hard time writing this chapter. So I went and re-read all your reviews and it really made me push on and finish it. :)

So, I, from the bottom of my heart thank you all.

I got the idea of this chapter from thinking about human emotions and how we always think we've moved on, when something brings us back and the feelings bite us in the ass. I always thought that Bonnie's feelings about being left in 1994 would not hit her until everything had settled and she didn't have anything left to distract her from facing the ugly truth: Her friends always gave up on her.

Enjoy and Review!

~Whorendous

Carry on my wayward son

There'll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Don't you cry no more

BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.

Bonnie flinched, the towel that she was using to gingerly clean the wound on her shoulder fell from her fingers with a plop onto the floor. She winced as her finger grazed the peeled back skin. The chill of the room curled over her exposed skin. She placed the new bandage on it quickly and then walked over to her dresser. Grabbing an oversized sweater she stole from Gram's room when she had died, Bonnie made her way back to her bed.

"Bonnie! Let us in!" The sound of Caroline's voice pierced Bonnie's ears and she covered them, desperately trying to drown out everything around her. Her eyes squeezed tight and she whimpered at the bandage pulling at her tender skin. Her ankles wobbled and she became unbalanced. She reached out to her bed post but it was too late. She collapsed to the ground, the shock of the wooden floor painfully shot up to her thighs. Her mouth unhinged in a quiet scream.

"Please, Bonnie. We know you're going through something and we…we just want to help."

Elena's voice sounded so hurt and yet, the last thing Bonnie wanted to do was open that door. The showdown with Kai was horrific and eye opening. She felt so hollow. The desire to hide from the world and drift away was relentless. The dark shadow that had been following her since she clawed her way back, finally made an encore appearance. And it was being a real bitch.

"Go away!" Bonnie groaned and rolled onto the floor. The cool, hard wood was uncomfortable and it made her shoulder itch painfully but it was enough to replace the resentment, anger, and inkiness of abandonment she could feel tearing into her brain. If only a little bit.

She kicked away the first aid kit, the metal scratching along the floor. Ugh! She thought she was over this already! She was feeling so good when she got back. She really was. Bonnie was elated that she could see her misfit family. Not to mention could wear clothes that didn't look like they came out of a freaking thrift shop. Hell, she even got over Jeremy. Granted, his ways of…mourning… had expedited process along. Bonnie was mad as hell that this was happening to her again. For God's sake, Kai was gone. They won. She won.

And yet, the ugly cloud of emotions assembled together within her forming a hurricane could not be denied. Bonnie grit her teeth. It was all his fault. Her head thumped onto the floor, her neck too tight and tired to hold it up. She glared at the ceiling and let the memories wash over her.

Three days ago…

Kai gripped Elena by the back of her neck as he grinned at Bonnie.

"Oh good, the useless one is here."

Bonnie's knuckles turned white as they clenched at her sides. She threw a poisoned smile his way.

"Well, you know me Kai. Put someone I care about in danger and…" Flames licked the air around her. She smirked at him.

Kai sighed dramatically and tossed Elena away to the side. Elena groaned and Jeremy dragged her back to their end of the field.

"Always with the fire. Can't you doing anything unique Bon-Bon?"

"Sure, I can. But watching you burn will be just so…satisfying." Her nose crinkled as she smirked and cocked her head to the side.

Kai screamed as his arm caught on fire and he fell to the ground to put it out. Bonnie could feel Damon's eyes on her as she walked to where Kai had fallen, she turned her head and gave him a reassured smile. She could visibly see the vampire's muscles relax but not enough to be unguarded.

Seems like he was determined to be her pit pull in this fight. She frowned. Kai's laughter made her whip her head back into his direction.

Kai sat up gleefully, his arm unharmed. He looked down at it and back to Bonnie. He raised the arm, only to wiggle his fingers at Bonnie mockingly.

"Learned a couple of new tricks while you gone."

He stood up, confidence rolling around him. He snapped his fingers like he had just remembered something important. He grabbed an iPhone from his pocket. "Oh yeah, can someone explain this…twitter thing to me?" He walked toward the direction of Caroline, Stefan walking in front of her, when another flash of fire roared in his path. He looked at Bonnie and clicked his tongue. He winced slightly and paused. "I'm a little new to this world but skinny jeans are just really not for men." He squatted a little and adjusted the crotch of his pants then backed away from Caroline and Stefan. "But you know Bon-Bon that is the least of my worries about this world. I mean COME ON, what have you guys done to the Ninja Turtles?!"

Bonnie stood absolutely still as she watched him rant. He caught her absolutely off guard with his defense to her flames and she was rushing through all the Grimoire knowledge in her head. She was only supposed to distract him until Jo came back with their coven in tow, but she could feel the tang of bloodlust on her tongue. He attacked her. He attacked Elena. He prevented her from going home. She wanted to kill him and the thought of it…of watching his skin crack and peel under the heat of the fire she could conjure, didn't faze her. She was actually enjoying the thought of killing someone. She cocked her head to the side, still watching him yammer on, and then she came to startling the conclusion: she didn't give one fucking damn.

Damon rolled his neck and walked behind Bonnie, his eyes never leaving the little dipshit. He leaned forward, over Bonnie's shoulders and whispered in her ear.

"Was he always this annoying?"

And just like that, the boiling need to make a flaming shish-kabob started to dwindle. She snorted and looked back at him briefly.

"Try to stay focused, Damon."

Damon smirked.

"Focused? I am focused, Judgey."

She scoffed at him.

"You chasing Elena like a starving dog? That was focus. This is not. Now," she moved her hand to push him back, "go back to your spot. I got this, Damon."

Damon's lips rolled in and he threw a quick glare at Bonnie's head.

"Low blow."

Bonnie sighed. Okay, she did feel a little bad about that one. "Sorry."

Damon's gaze softened. He went to touch her arm. "Don't even think about dying this time, witch. Kai is a douche but even he isn't douchey enough for that. I'm not leaving you behind again."

Bonnie's eyes widened and she turned around, unable to quench the need to see if he really meant it. Damon stared back with a serious but honest expression across his face.

"Aw, so the love-hate thing is working for you two? I always wondered if his love for pathetic little Elena would keep this," he waggled his pointer finger between Bonnie and Damon, "from totally happening." Kai's breathe grazed the back of Bonnie's neck, and she could feel his magic burn into her shoulder. She screamed in pain and turned around to glare at him.

"Back off Kai." Damon glared at the warlock, pulling Bonnie behind him as he moved into Kai's space.

Kai raised his hands and backed up about a foot or two. "Can I tell you? This is all very 90210."

Bonnie could hear Caroline mumble out to the right, "Ugh…why is this psycho talking about some trashy reboot?!"

Kai looked at Caroline with astonishment. "Are you kidding me right now? They remade 90210?" He sighed deeply. "I guess it beats a talking sponge. Which by the way, that show clearly does not understand how physics work. I mean, a fire under water?"

Kai jutted out his lip and looked at the sky.

"You know, I was alwa-"

"Motus."

Kai flew across the field like a rag-doll, his back slamming against the rough bark of a tree.

Bonnie glared at him as she walked out from behind Damon's back. Power swirled around her and her eyes held the bright flames of hate.

"Duratus."

Kai's eyes widened as he tried to move his limbs but they stayed stuck to the trunk of the tree. He struggled against the ropes of Bonnie's magic, his lungs burning from the exertion of his attempts.

Bonnie marched confidently up to the tree. "See, Kai, I learned a few tricks of my own."

Kai paused and looked down at her thoughtfully. Then he looked over her head to her companions who laid in wait. Looking back at Bonnie, a grin slowly creeping onto his face.

"Did they even fight for you?"

Bonnie's heart stopped but she kept her face neutral. She raised her chin and crossed her arms.

"Excuse me?"

Kai chuckled.

"They didn't, did they? I had some one on one time with dearest Elena, after I drained some of her Doppelgänger blood of course." He sniffed and twitched his nose, getting comfortable.

"Did you know that your "bestie" over there didn't think once to get you back? In fact, she told me she didn't want to try until Damon did."

Bonnie forced her breathing to stay steady. She prayed that Jo would come soon or else she wouldn't be able to hold off killing him for much longer.

Kai smirked.

"You know…I watched them. Elena was kinda half-assing the whole rescue thing, if you ask me. She would just sigh and look at Damon," his voice pitched high mocking a girl's voice "Oh my god, he is just so cute trying to get my best friend back. We should go on a date tonight. Thai or Mexican?" Kai clicked his tongue again, voice returning to normal. "Does that sound like a best friend to you?"

Bonnie's eyes narrowed and she whispered another incantation and a sharp branch of a nearby tree flew into her hands. She looked at him straight in the eyes as she stabbed him in the stomach.

Kai yelled in pain, biting down so hard drool was falling out.

"Sounds like pain to me." Bonnie smiled, admiring her work.

Kai sucked in a breath and glared.

"Don't you get it? None of them wanted you back, Bonnie. You were the farthest from their minds. So, why the hell do you fight for them?"

Bonnie was stunned into silence. It couldn't be true, could it? She looked back at her friends, her eyes jumping from one to the other. She looked back at Kai, her mouth firmly set in a straight line.

"You do not get to judge my family, when you tried to kill yours."

Coughing up blood, Kai still managed to laugh.

"Didn't you ever wonder why no one tried to go back for you? Why you had to get back by yourself? Because they didn't care enough to get you back. And yet here you are, fighting to keep them alive. I bet you do this for them a lot." He tilted his head. "You seem like the abused puppy type."

Bonnie could feel her knuckles pop at the amount of force she was clenching them with.

"You think I'm doing this for them?" She shook her head and ripped out the makeshift poker from his body with flourish. She watched in fascination as his blood cascaded down, falling over her hand. Her green eyes flitted back to his, sharp and clear.

"This is for me."

Kai's screams could be heard by the approaching coven as Bonnie repeatedly stabbed him over and over. Tears falling down her face.

Bonnie shut her eyes tight, forcing back the tears. A sob escaped her. What has she turned into? Why did no one come for her? Why was she all alone in this?

She gingerly stood up and moved to the bathroom. A shower. She felt so dirty.

"Bonnie please!"

Damon frowned as he heard Elena's voice from within Bonnie's house. After Kai had sucked away the Traveler's spell, they were all able to go their homes. Bonnie refused to go to her father's house and decided to remain at her Gram's. Damon helped her move her stuff in there from the dorm. That was two days ago. He hadn't heard from her since and because the witch still didn't have a new cell phone for him to blow up with text messages, he decided to visit. Apparently, he wasn't the only one.

He walked into the foyer and went up the stairs to Bonnie's room. There he witnessed two hysterical baby-vamps knocking furiously on the door. He strutted behind them.

"What is going on?"

Caroline turned around and glared at him.

"Why do you care?"

Damon glared back.

"Because I do, Barbie. Now tell me what the fuck is going on to make you pound her door in?"

Elena turned around and looked him, tears brimming in her eyes.

"Bonnie won't come out. She refuses to talk to us. She's acting so different, Damon." Elena and Caroline looked at each other before looking at Damon again.

"We don't know what to do. She's never shut us out like this before." Caroline spoke up somberly.

Damon rubbed his face, trying to starve off the lecture he had been bottling up inside for a while now. He crossed his armed and looked down at them, his hard stare unsettling.

"She also has never been stuck in a frozen crappy bubble of the 90's. Or almost stabbed someone to death. Jesus, what the hell do you think is going on with her?! She's freaking out."

Both Elena and Caroline looked down at the floor biting their lips.

Damon shook his head.

"Get out. I'll take care of this." He pushed them out of the way.

Elena grabbed his arm. "Damon."

He looked down at her hand and back to her. He peeled her hand away and pushed her back. Shaking his head gently.

Caroline could feel her anger snap. "What makes you think you can take care of her? She doesn't even like you."

Why does everyone say that? Damon's jaw clicked and he looked up at the ceiling, praying for patience. He twirled around and looked at Caroline.

"I am the only fucking person who knows what she is going through right now. I was there too, or did you forget, Barbie? And not to throw this out there or anything, but" he pointed to his chest "I'm the only one who worked my ass off to get her home."

"That's not fair. You didn't tell us she was alive!" Elena looked at him with contempt.

Damon groaned. "I didn't know until I found her bear!"

Caroline stomped her foot and waved her arms in the air. "Damn it, she got home herself! Don't act so high and mighty."

Damon switch his eyes to her mockingly and sneered lightly. "Exactly. Why do you think she doesn't want to see you?"

Both girls' eyes widened in realization. Silence fell around them. Suffocating guilt thickening the atmosphere.

Damon sighed and he put his hand on Elena's should. "Look. I am the only one here who can get away with this. I'm probably the only one who can understand. You need to walk away."

Elena nodded, her throat thick with emotion. Caroline closed her eyes and sighed. When she reopened them, she looked at him square in the eye.

"If you hurt her Damon, so help me. I don't care if it hurts Stefan, I will stake you myself." Caroline grabbed Elena's arm and dragged her down the stairs.

Damon let out a breath. He mumbled, "Wouldn't expect anything less." He turned around and narrowed his eyes in concentration on the door. Moving back he raised one booted foot and pulled a front ball kick.

The door fell away with a crash and he waved around the dust. He stepped in the room and looked around. He saw a bloodied shirt on the bedspread and his eyebrows furrowed in worry. His ears twitched when he heard the distinct sound of the shower turning on. He'll have to wait. Moved further in the room and sat on her bed. He stared at the bloodstained shirt and his fingers hovered over it. He should have protected her.

He was on edge. Kai had a lot of power now. The Traveler's dome of doom was a big spell, he was sure. Which meant Kai had a lot of juice on his side.

His eyes scanned Bonnie's body. Would she be able to handle it? He shook his head when she smiled at him over her shoulder. Of course she would. His witch was a fucking Bennett.

He looked at Bonnie again and noticed her shoulders shaking. The smell of fury overwhelmed her normal scent and it worried him. She was only supposed to distract Kai until Jo's stupid coven came. So he needed to distract her before she did something very stupid. He made his way over to her.

Damon sighed. Kai, that little shit-stain. He deserved so much more than what Bonnie had done. He sat up straighter when he heard a whimper come from bathroom. He waited to hear it again and when it didn't come, he relaxed a little bit. He looked at the picture of Bonnie's grandma on the side table. He silently apologized to Sheila for not protecting her grand baby.

Damon watched in shock, along with everyone else, as Bonnie stabbed Kai with the tree branch.

"Bonnie!" Both Elena and Caroline screamed. Damon noticed Jeremy and Stefan held them back out of the corner of his eye. Satisfied they couldn't do anything retarded, he reared his gaze back to the witch.

Damon's eyes narrowed as he caught wind of some of the shit Kai was spewing.

"Didn't you ever wonder why no one tried to go back for you? Why you had to get back by yourself?"

Damon was pissed. The fucking twerp was trying to mentally fuck with his witch. He made a move to pull Bonnie back when she ripped the branch from Kai's stomach. Only to stab him again. The anger left Damon in a whoosh. And when he smelled the sharp crisp smell of her tears, it finally dawned on him. He forced himself to hold back, hands at his sides, ever watchful.

He saw Elena and Caroline struggle to get to her. He threw out an arm to signal to them to halt, barking out "Stop." They looked at him curiously.

"She needs this." He whispered softly. His eyes watched her and he wondered if he could bring her back from this. For the first time, he doubted he could.

"It won't be over until she does this."

Damon closed his eyes in guilt. If only he rescued her, she wouldn't be in this mess. Kai wouldn't have gotten to her like he had. He punched the pillow on the headboard and he made to lay down when a choked cry froze him in his tracks. His heart dropped in his chest and he flashed to the bathroom door.

"Bonnie?"

He cringed waiting for Bonnie to yell at him for privacy. When she didn't he frowned. Making a decision he wrenched open the bathroom door.

"Witchy, I'm coming in, so don't get mad at me it's your fau-" His voice died in his throat when he saw Bonnie curled up on the tiled floor of the shower. She was naked and her sobs were so wretched that her body was shaking uncontrollably.

Shit. It was worse than he had thought.

Damon sighed and threw off his jacket. His shoes patted softly on the tile of the bathroom floor as he walked over to the shower. He yanked open the glass door and stared down at her.

She looked up at him, her eyes so broken and painful, his throat closed up at the sight of it.

"Damon." Her voice croaked. She whined and looked down. "What is happening to me? Why did no one come for me?"

Damon swallowed hard and walked into the shower, closing the door behind him. The water fell on him, soaking though his clothes. He kept his eyes on her as he kneeled down and put his hand on her cheek. He held back some of her hair with his other hand so she could see him. She blinked back at him slowly.

"I got you. It's okay. I got you." He repeated this as he sat down next to her, leaning his back against the shower wall. He pulled her up onto his lap, holding her tight. A hand gripping the side of her head and the other on top of one of her knees. He could feel her small fingers grip his wet shirt like he was the last thing she would ever see. His heart twisted as he realized how fragile she was. She always seemed so strong, fighting against him. Calling him out on all his shit. Then saving them all whenever she had the chance. But holding her like this, seeing her so…shattered…forced him see that she was just a regular girl, who should have been watched over from the get-go. A wave of protectiveness washed over him and his decision was made. He wasn't going to let her be alone ever again.

He kissed her forehead and then he let her head fall onto his shoulder. His hand ran through her hair as another rack of sobs escaped her. He sighed.

"I got you, Bonnie. Always."