Chapter 3 – Explanations

Lisbon wiped her tears and hailed a cab. She just wanted to go home and forget what he had said. To forget the rush of adrenalin she had swallowed down when he had told her he was in love with her. It couldn't be true, not after all this time. Of course she had fantasised about him saying those words, so many times she was embarrassed even admitting that to herself.

She thought back to when he had come back from South America and he had hugged her for the first time. She thought she saw a change in his eyes. A different way of looking at her than he did when they knew each other before. He couldn't seem to take his eyes off her. Then Fischer had walked into the room and she felt like she had been run over by a steam train. It was obvious Fischer and he had shared some kind of connection on the island. She had been the one to persuade him to come back after all. And she had fooled him. Nothing was more attractive to Patrick Jane than for a woman to get one over on him. Erica Flynn certainly fitted that bill as did Lorelei Martins. And Fischer had none of the homicidal tendencies of that pair so maybe she was the right match for him. And it was obvious from the start that Fischer was attracted to him but, to be fair, most women were.

But then nothing had come of it and over the last couple of months Lisbon knew that whatever connection they had found on the island had fizzled out. In the midst of it all he had asked a suspect out on a date. That had hurt her. Not that he was going out with this woman but it showed her he hadn't changed at all. She knew he wasn't interested in Krystal but he still kept her in the dark to his plan, letting her worry herself sick that he'd gotten into trouble. That he was still the closed book he had always been.

As the cab dropped her home she checked her phone. Six missed calls from him already. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. That man never knew when to leave things alone once he had his mind set. She changed into a tank top and sleep shorts and turned on the TV in the living room. It was only a matter of time before he showed up at her door.

Jane reached the car but knew Lisbon had ditched him. For a small woman she could certainly walk fast and he'd lost her within minutes of her storming off. She wasn't picking up his calls. That left only one option if he was going to settle anything tonight. He got into the car and headed to her house.

When he knocked on the door she didn't answer but he could see the light on inside and hear the soft sound of gunfire from the television.

'Lisbon, please open the door' he called through her letterbox.

'Go away, Jane. I'll talk to you tomorrow' she called back.

She waited on the couch, turning the television down after hearing no sound after a few moments. She didn't think he would be so easily discouraged and got off the sofa and peered out the window to see if she could catch a glance of him outside.

Just then a hand appeared on her shoulder giving it a tap. Her instincts kicked in instantly and she pulled the hand attached to her shoulder and turned the owner of it around so he faced the wall beside her.

'Lisbon! It's me!' Jane screamed, his arm still twisted around his back.

She shook her head, bringing her heart rate down but continuing to hold him against the wall by his wrist. 'I'm aware, you jackass! What did you expect when you break into my home?' He had obviously picked the lock of her back door.

'I needed to talk to you. To make you listen' he said, getting his breath back.

She exhaled deeply and let go of him, her cheeks burning with rage. He turned around and widened his eyes, rubbing the wrist she had caught. He shook his head. 'Jesus, you have some hold on you, woman.'

She rolled her eyes and marched off to the adjoining kitchen. As she stormed off he watched her toned legs and then his attention focused on her ass covered in a pair of white soft shorts. He hadn't seen her display so much flesh since the night they arrested her psychiatrist. While he had some less than platonic thoughts that night this was a whole other ballgame now. It certainly wasn't just lustful thoughts that entered his head now although at the moment his body's reaction to her was telling him a different story. He heard the kettle go on the stove and, as soon as he was back in control of himself, joined her.

She was still pouting and slamming cupboards and the fridge to make tea. He looked over at the teabag she was putting in a mug.

'You don't have any chamomile, do you? Good for stress. Or peppermint? Can help with shock.'

She glared at him. 'You'll get what you're given or get out. Which is it?'

He bit back most of a smile but the corners of his lips rose involuntarily. 'Well, since you're being such a gracious host how could I refuse but stay' he replied.

He saw her bite back a smile of her own, biting her lip to stop it forming. He smiled at her fully now and raised his eyebrows. She looked over at him and shook her head, smiling herself now. 'Why the hell can't I ever stay mad at you?'

He wanted to say because she loved him but, considering their last conversation on the subject, decided to stay silent and shrugged instead.

They brought their teas back into the living room and took up residence on the couch.

'So, good evening? Anything interesting happen?' Jane said, taking a sip.

She laughed, spilling some of her tea before putting the cup down on the coffee table and sighed. 'Why did you have to say that earlier?'

Jane shrugged. 'Because it's true.'

Lisbon shook her head. 'If there's one thing you've taught me it's that there are no such things as co-incidences. So what else would you call suddenly declaring your love for me as soon as I start to see someone?'

Jane bit his lip. 'Okay, you may have been partially right. If you hadn't started seeing Pike then I may not have said what I said to you earlier.'

Lisbon nodded. 'At last, the truth.'

Jane held a hand up. 'No, Lisbon. I said you were only partially right. You're right in that if you hadn't started seeing him then I would probably still be content with the way things were between us. Work colleagues, friends. I don't like change much and...with you...I mean if something were to happen with you...in that way...then it's about the biggest change to my life...to our lives...that there could be.'

'What happened with Fischer when she found you?'

The question and abrupt change in topic threw him. 'Fischer? What's she got to do with any of this?'

Lisbon shrugged. 'She fooled you. That doesn't happen very often. Not unless your judgement is clouded.'

Jane nodded, realising where she was going with this. 'You think because I didn't realise she was an FBI agent I was attracted to her.'

'Were you?'

Jane sighed. 'Yes, I was.' He saw the look of hurt flit across Lisbon's face at his words. 'Let me explain. Teresa, I was on that island for two years. By the time I'd met her I could count on one hand all the conversations I had with fellow Americans. I was...lonely I guess. So, yes, when I met her I was attracted to her. She was nice, good company and I'd missed being understood by someone.'

'So nothing happened with her?'

'Nothing happened.' Jane paused, looking at his wedding ring and twisting it. 'But I did do something before I went to dinner with her. I took off my wedding ring.'

Lisbon looked at him, startled. 'You did? For her?'

Jane shook his head. 'For me. To see if I was ready to move on. For all intents and purposes I was going on a date with her. So I took it off. Not because it was her, just to see how I felt without it.'

Lisbon swallowed. 'So what happened?'

Jane tilted his head to the side and smiled. 'I was okay to begin with, chatting with her and trying to relax. We even went dancing. Then I got blind drunk, got beat up and she had to put me to bed. The next morning I put it back on.'

Lisbon's lips curled into a smile. 'So, not a total success, then?'

He smiled at her. 'Well, I'd say it was on par with our date tonight. Good beginning but falling flat at the end.'

'We weren't on a date, Jane' she corrected him.

'The night isn't over yet, Teresa.' His eyes twinkled and she blushed.

He put his fingers around his wedding ring and pulled it off, placing it on the coffee table in front of them. She looked at it and then at him.

'I don't intend to put it back on this time' he stated, gazing at her.

'Jane-'

'Teresa, there's only one reason I came back to the U.S. You think I came back here to work in Law Enforcement again? The very reason I joined it in the first place doesn't exist anymore. You think I couldn't find a way to get out of Abbott's deal if I wanted to? The only reason I'm here...the only reason I came back was for you.'

Her eyes went back to the ring on the table and she swallowed.

'Teresa, I love you. You read my letters. I know I never said it there but I said everything else but that. I told you that you being absent was the one thing that made that new chapter strange and sad. I told you I missed you in every one.'

She shrugged. 'I know. I assumed you meant as a friend.'

'I didn't write to any of my other friends. And if I had I wouldn't have used those words.'

Lisbon smiled. 'Can't see Pete enjoying those sentiments too much.'

Jane chortled before becoming serious again. 'Look, I'm sorry I waited so long. I just hope I'm not too late. I was a coward. I was scared of letting someone get close to me again. I still am. But...I'd like to try...with you. That's why I said you were partially right. It might have taken you going out with Pike to make me confront my feelings but please believe that those feelings are genuine. I love you. I'm in love with you.'

He suddenly moved off the couch. 'You don't have to decide anything tonight. You'll need time to think things over. When you weigh your options I'm decidedly the worse man. If you think you're up for the ordeal going out with me will surely be at times you know where I am.' He moved across to the door.

Lisbon got off the couch. 'Jane. Wait.'

He turned around as she walked up to him. She could see how close he was to tears, the nervousness in how his hands were shaking and the vulnerability in his features. His breathing was ragged.

She bit her lip and stared at him for a few moments. 'I don't have enough information to make an informed choice' she said.

His eyes questioned her. 'Teresa, I don't know what else you want me to say-'

Suddenly her lips were on his, a soft but strong kiss that made him close his eyes instantly. He was so surprised he just stood there, his arms still at his side. She pulled back and he blinked rapidly for a second.

She crossed her arms in front of her. 'If we're going to be dating then I'll expect you to kiss me back when I kiss you. That's rule one.'

His features softened immediately. 'Are you sure? I'm an emotional wreck. I'll probably keep things from you to begin with. I'll try to open up more but it'll be hard to change my ways overnight-'

Her lips touched his again. This time he pressed his to hers and moved his hands to her hips before she pulled back again.

'Are you trying to talk me out of this now?' She began to say.

It was he who kissed her this time, his arms encircling her waist and his lips pressing harder upon hers. She parted her lips and his tongue swept across them and inside her mouth. She gasped as he pulled her closer to his body, his hands caressing her back. Finally she pulled back, a little breathless to see his eyes dark with desire.

He smirked at her, the arrogant man she had known for so long now back in charge. 'Not talking you out of it. Just making sure you know what you're taking on.'

She smiled back. 'Since when do I back down from a challenge?'

He kissed her again, a small peck this time. 'You'll finish it with Pike?'

She nodded. Suddenly a phone appeared in front of her face. 'You want to use my phone?' How had he done that? She hadn't even felt his hands moving from her back.

She shook her head. 'You want me to do it now?'

'Before you come to your senses I think it'd be wise, yes.'

She rolled her eyes and extricated herself from his arms. She picked up her own phone and went into the bedroom to make the call.

As she was making the call he looked at the wedding ring on the table. He stared at it, waiting for the urge to put it back on that he had felt when he took it off before. But no urge came and he knew he was ready. It just took being with the right woman for him to realise that.

She came out of the bedroom a few minutes later and found him reheating his tea in the kitchen.

'All done' she said brightly.

'You okay?' he asked.

She shrugged. 'Sure, it was only a few dates. Besides, he told me he's on the shortlist for a big job in D.C. so he might not have been around much longer anyway.'

Jane nodded. 'Damn, if I'd known that I wouldn't have said anything' he grinned.

She whacked him on the arm. 'You better damn well be joking.'

He pulled her into his arms, kissing her passionately. 'Does that answer your question?' he replied, as his lips trailed along her neck.

- THE END -

A/N: Thanks to all of you who read this, hope you enjoyed the ending.

P.S The line about him saying in his letter that she being absent being the one thing that made this new chapter strange and sad comes from the letter he wrote in My Blue Heaven for those eagle eyed viewers. (The actual line was, 'You being absent is the one thing that made this new chapter strange and sad.') He also apologises in it for leaving her on the beach when he went to his house to kill Red John but I didn't put it into this story..