A/N Disclaimer : I don't own Harry Potter

Written for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry (Challenges & Assignments) Care of Magical Creatures (Assignment 9)

Prompt: A professor playing a practical joke on students

Word count: 690 (ish)

"Oh my god we've killed him!" Marlene wailed dramatically.

"Someone do something!"

Peter stumbled to his feet. "We never wanted to kill him!"

The rest of the class remained speechless and stared at the lifeless form of their potions professor.

Thirty minutes earlier...

"C'mon it'll be funny." James wheedled. "Please Padfoot it'll be great! We'd go down in history. I mean, how many other first years have ever turned their professor into a gerbil before?"

"You're preaching to the converted Prongsie. It's Moony who's too chicken to do it."

Sirius made chicken noises and Remus attempted to ignore him.

"Fine. We don't need you Remus. What about you Peter?"

"Um... I guess if you and Sirius are doing it I could help..."

James smiled happily. "This is gonna be awesome."

Oh Merlin. They would go down in history all right. They would be the first people to kill a professor and hold the record for the shortest time to be expelled.

Lily Evans- his Lily -was dragging Snivellus up to the front.

"C'mon Sev. You're the best at potions in the year, can't you do something?"

Ugh. It made him sick- her adoring face staring imploringly at his ugly mug.

"James!" Sirius waved a hand in front of his face. "Mate we have bigger problems than Evans and her stupid boyfriend."

"Oh yeah. Dead teacher. Impending suspension. Shoot.

Fifteen minutes earlier...

"Okay class, you have ten minutes left to go."

Professor Verus watched the class as they frantically hurried to finish their potions. He carefully studied the four boys in the corner of the room and sighed.

"All right everyone, time's up. Decant your potions into a small vial and bring them up to the front."

The class had produced hiccuping potions with varying levels of success. Frank Longbottom's cauldron was smoking, but Lily Evans and Alice Fortescue's potion was simmering nicely. Severus Snapes' potion appeared perfect as always but everyone else's were fairly mediocre.

And then there were the Marauders' potions. Remus Lupin's looked passable, but perhaps poison was a better word to describe what Sirius Black and James Potter had cooked up.

"Mr Potter please bring me your vial."

He saw the two boys nudge each other and grin. Didn't they realise how dangerous it was to mess with something like this? They needed to learn a lesson.

He laughed to himself. What he was planning wasn't very professional, but he didn't think anyone would mind particularly.

He uncorked the vial, and took a swig from the other bottle he had hidden in his sleeve. Suddenly he crumpled to the floor. His heart rate slowed down and his breathing became so shallow it was almost unnoticeable. Through half closed eyes he watched as pandemonium rushed through the students.

"What do we do?"

"We can't tell anyone."

"Of course you have to tell someone!"

"I knew all your stupid pranking would hurt someone eventually." Lily glared at James while a couple of girls sobbed in the corner.

"Shut up!"

"I'm going to get Dumbledore!" Snape ran out off the room.

"Tattle tale!" James called after him, but halfheartedly.

Professor Dumbledore strode into the room.

"What's going on?"

"Ah, headmaster. If I could have a word with you?" Professor Verus stood up and straightened his robes.

"Of course."

"Okay, class dismissed! But you three wait here please"

James, Sirius and Peter slumped down in their chairs as everyone else left in varying states of shock and distress.

"Professor I'm sorry, please don't punish us"

"Stand up Peter. I'm not angry, and I think you've been punished quite enough don't you? I just want you to realise how dangerous messing around with potions can be."

"Yes Sir." They nodded shamefacedly.

"Alright. You can go, but if I catch you trying to poison me again there will be consequences."

They all headed for the door, relieved to have got away, but James turned back just before leaving.

"By the way Professor, that was awesome!"