Disclaimer: This is a non-profit work of fan-fiction, based off the Naruto and Naruto:Shippuden series by Masashi Kishimoto.


Steps

It isn't forgetfulness that stops Naruto from confronting his admirer after his fight with Pein. He is painfully conscious of the memory of Hinata standing before him, saying words he thought he'd never hear from her. And then she is blasted away like an insignificant insect, and that is when things start to get fuzzy and crimson chaos bleeds into his recollection.

He isn't shocked by the fact that somebody has told him that they love him. Hinata is the first to outright come out and say it, but both Jiraiya and Tsunade have made it clear that they love him like their own family. It does feel strange to hear it said out loud, from someone his own age no less, but a little awkwardness has never stopped Konoha's Number 1 Unpredictable Ninja before.

It isn't his love for Sakura either, that stops him on his way to the Hyuuga compound and makes him turn away, back to the safety of his own home. Even though a part of him still hopes that Sakura will finally reciprocate his feelings, he can no longer remain blind to the fact that she's utterly devoted to Sasuke.

It is anger that stays his reply. Anger, first, that Hinata would jump in to try and protect him against a ninja of Pein's calibre. No matter that it is Kakashi's first lesson to him as a ninja, to never leave a comrade behind – look where that philosophy got his sensei, and he was the famed Copy Ninja of Fire Country. Dark, weird Hinata never had a chance, and it angers him that she would throw her life away like that, when he's fighting so hard to save it.

He tells himself it is anger, at least, when he's lying on the ground at night and trying to find Jiraiya's place amidst the stars. There is an ugly current of fear that pulls at him every time he thinks of the moment, and for the first time he is afraid to be Hokage if it means to deal with this sort of loyalty every day.

But even forgetfulness or surprise or fear-tinged anger falls to the wayside over what he first experiences when he first takes a moment to think back to her confession.

Naruto has long since come to terms with his terrible childhood, forgiving the people of Konoha even if he will never, ever forget. But he is disgusted and betrayed by the fact that the girl who claims to love him would watch him suffer and chafe through the first decade of his life, and do nothing about it despite her so-called affection for him.

Every reminiscence about his childhood is now coloured by her words. He can suddenly imagine Hinata peeking out at him in every one of his memories, and he's unsure of whether he's never genuinely noticed before, or his mind is simply adding that little detail now that she's confirmed it. Either way, he can only feel fury and shame, both harsh bedfellows, when he thinks of her apathy to his pain. Being silently party to a crime is as punishable by Konoha law as perpetrating one is.

So Naruto holds his words within him and never deigns to reply to the girl. He is sure that one day he will have to work out his mess of feelings and deal with her, but it is too raw now. It isn't hatred he feels; no, hate will always be too strong a word, but disappointment is one that comes very close.

Hinata, to his surprise, does not react. There is no tearful plea or jealous demand for him to return her feelings. The world continues like the little event never happened. It is a little calm between the storms that is washed off the pages of history with the force of Jiraiya's two disciples. Life in Konoha continues as usual, and Hinata only smiles wanly and nods to him when they pass in the streets.

Naruto pretends he does not see the sadness or longing on her face when she thinks he isn't looking. She doesn't deserve his love – after everything he's been through, everything he's done, love is the one thing he will not skimp out or compromise on. He will allow himself the full luxury of that one thing in life.

After weeks of silence between them, a tiny corner of his mind begins to think that Hinata feels the same way.

That causes him to pause for a moment and take a second look. Maturity has come at a high price in the wake of Akatsuki's invasion, but Naruto calls on what little he has to reassess the girl objectively.

Hinata was a coward when she was younger, there is no getting past that. She has silently watched Naruto get beaten down again and again by the world, and done nothing about it. Most people would instantly cross her off a list of potential romances and never forgive her, but forgiveness is something that Naruto has to dole out by the bucket loads if he ever wants to live a normal life, for the alternative is going rogue and taking his pound of flesh in exact measure. Even Sakura has her own share of crimes and missteps that he has had to pardon, for all her loveliness.

But people can change – Naruto himself is an example, Nagato another. Even now, he holds out hope that Sasuke will see the error of his ways and return to Konoha. His brain tells him that it isn't fair for him to judge the Hyuuga based on the sins of her past. His heart disagrees and makes him hold out.

He doesn't decide to give her a chance until he sees her standing her ground in the Fourth World War, fighting back to back with him and her cousin, throwing herself before him again to allow him precious moments to recuperate. The darkness in his heart is filtered out until guilt remains, with the insistent niggling of something that feels a lot like admiration.

He reaches out to take her hand, his own wreathed with the warm Yang-chakra from the nine-tails. It feels tiny and delicate against his palm.

He decides that he likes the feel of it.


A/N: Yep, I won't go outright and develop it into a romance, because I wanted to stick as hard to canon as I could. Honestly, however well-written after-Akatsuki-invasion stories are, they always feel the tiniest bits off to me. This is my attempt to both justify and rectify that. Drop a review on your way out on your agreement/disagreement/critique, please!