When she comes to, there are only two colors in Bella's world: red and black. There's red covering her hands, her dress, her skin, a dark and heady crimson. Around her, there is only black – trees and shadows, darkened by the night, surround her entirely. She is lying on the ground, she realizes, and then a third color enters her world: light. Starlight. The entire night-sky is covered in beautifully shining stars. She feels good and somehow light, as if all the heavy feelings were drained out of her and only those bright stars remained. Gorgeous. Her lips curl into a fond smile.

She doesn't know how long she's stared at the sky when her wits return to her. She is Bella. She is in the past, seventeen hundred something. Her husband - - her husband is gone. She remembers Alice by her side. They were running, in a forest, with trees by their sides just like this... and then there was a camp... a loud explosion... and Edward...

She tries to get to her feet, but her entire body seems to be aflame; her muscles ache, her joints are sore, and worst of all, her head feels like it's splitting in half. It's a bad ache, deep in her bones, almost unbearingly painful. Still she gets to her feet and, although she is reeling for a bit, looks around herself. Bella is in a forest, deep and dense, with thin trees looking like they've been burned down not long ago. She doesn't know this forest, but then again, all forests look the same in her opinion. She's not sure if she should call out, but the pain and the mounting dread in her guts make her a bit desperate, a bit foolish.

"Hello?" she says and notices her voice sounds horribly hoarse. Even when she clears her throat it doesn't become better. "Is anyone here?" Bella is starting to be scared. She tries to remember despite the maddening pain in her head. What happened? What happened to make her wake up alone in a strange forest? They searched for Edward. She entered the General's tent. And then... and then... her headache is getting worse. She closes her eyes, in pain.

"Bella?" asks a gentle voice. Bella jumps back. Alice suddenly stands in front of her, a leather skin in her hands. She is shaking, Bella notices, and then looks at her own hands. They are both shaking.

"Alice," she croaks. Alice doesn't waste a single second and pushes the skin into her hands.

"Drink," she orders. Bella complies. They stand in silence for a few moments while Bella drinks until she can't breathe anymore. The water is clear and fresh, and it helps her to focus her confusing thoughts.

"What happened," Bella asks, "there was Edward... and... and..." So much red. So much blood. And then, there was blood on her hands too. Bella stares at her hands. They are caked with dried blood. She feels a sob heaving its way up her throat. It is so much blood. Where did all this blood come from? Whose is it? Alice puts a hand on her upper arm, and Bella jerks back. She sobs again. "What happened, Alice?" she asks again, slightly more hysterical than before. "Where's Edward? Where's Edward? Whose blood, whose, what... where's Edward?!" Her voice grows to a shrill shriek. Alice tries to calm her down, runs her hand up and down Bella's arm, but Bella doesn't feel like being calm ever again. "Tell me!"

"Please be quiet!" Alice interrupts her, screaming. Only then does Bella notice that there are tears streaking her face. "Bella, be quiet. They're probably hunting for us." Her voice falls lower, but she's still visibly upset. "They can't find us. They'll kill us. Please be quiet..."

"Yes," Bella says, slow and careful, "yes. Quiet. What happened, Alice?" she insists. Alice looks straight at her, which feels like a good sign – if something terrible had happened, she wouldn't be able to look Bella in the eyes, right?

"I don't exactly know what happened to you, Bella. I found you both at the edge of the camp. You were talking to Edward, so fast I could not understand a word, and frankly, neither could Edward. You looked like a crazed animal. Then you just collapsed. We carried you as far as we could, but Edward, he's – he's really badly hurt. I went to fetch water."

Bella feels as if all the pain within her body has just vanished. She feels like crying from happiness. Edward is alive! He may be badly hurt, but he is alive! "And- Jasper?" she remembers asking. Alice's face clouds over immediately. She looks like she is going to start crying soon.

"Jasper is gone," she says, with a finality that scares Bella. "Come. I'll get you to Edward. He's sleeping, or so I think. He looks bad." Alice's eyes roam over Bella. "Frankly, so do you. Are you hurt?"

"Only a bit," Bella lies. She follows Alice around a few trees and through thick, wild bushes as high as a man. Within them, surrounded by leaves and bugs, Edward is lying on the ground. It's dark and Bella can't see much, but she falls to her knees immediately and strokes his hair. He's breathing shallowly but audibly. She thanks all the gods she knows while Alice, making the sign of the cross, kneels down next to her. Then Alice checks Bella for injuries. They don't find anything serious, some bruises and probably a bruised rib, but nothing that needs to be treated immediately. Then they sit by Edward's side. Sometimes, he groans in his sleep, and then Alice slips him some water, but otherwise all is quiet until the sun comes crawling over the horizon and brings with it birds, heralding the beginning of a new day. Edward wakes along with the birds. His gaze is unfocused and milky while he looks between Bella and Alice.

"Wha-" he begins, but his voice breaks. He coughs and it sounds horrible, so before they talk, Bella checks him again, the way she has done what feels like a lifetime ago, when she first came to this time and decided to stay because she could not let this man die. His body looks like a nightmare. There are cuts and gashes everywhere, bruises bleeding into each other, blue and red and yellow, and Bella is sure he has to have some internal bleeding. His skin feels too hot to the touch, too; there is a fever on the way, she knows it.

"I couldn't rescue Jasper," Alice admits, shivering. Her eyes lock with Edward's and the look on his face is one of pure agony. "I, I... there were too many... I got him out, but they overwhelmed us. He told me to run and leave him behind. He begged me while he was lying on the ground with two redcoats on his back." She dry-heaves. "The camp is gone. The English are panicking. They don't know what happened and the explosion made them uneasy. They're hurrying; they're past the mountains. If Jasper's still alive, we've lost him." She ends her short monologue with an expression that breaks Bella's heart. Alice tries to be strong, but there is a pain so deep within her; a pain so horrible that Bella has rarely ever felt something like this in her life. Alice is struggling not to let it show, tries to be strong for them, and Bella embraces her warmly. The two women cling to each other for a moment.

"We have to get him back," Edward says, sitting up weakly. Where he is not covered with dried blood or bruises, he is covered in rapidly cooling sweat. "These people – they are monsters. They are not human. We cannot leave him with monsters. Alice. Sister. You know we cannot."

Alice smiles at him sadly. "We cannot, but we must."

"I won't leave him. He is my brother-in-law. Alice loves him. I won't leave him..." Edward is babbling. His temperature has gotten worse the past two days, so much so they don't dare move him; so he just lies in the dirty underbrush of a disgusting forest. "I can't leave him. Alice loves him. She loves him..." he keeps mumbling. His eyes are closed, but Bella can see his pupils moving rapidly.

She is not red anymore. She washed the blood off her body in an nearby brook, rubbed at her skin until she was raw. Her skin was reddened thereafter, but not from the blood but from her rubbing, and it made her look ruddy rather than murderous, which was definitely an improvement. It's all gone now and it will not return. She washed her clothes too, although they are permanently stained a faint auburn color now, where the blood mingled with the brown of her skirt.

She realized, one day ago after a nightmare, that she murdered the General with a knife. With a knife! She could feel his blood pouring onto her bare hands. The memory makes her retch so she doesn't dwell on it. That makes two people she has murdered within a few days, three if you count poor, innocent Jacob, who followed her and died a hero's death for the deed. Bella is becoming a mass murderer. It makes her sick and horrifies her, but what horrifies her most is that she would do it all again to protect Edward; this pale man who mumbles about his brother-in-law in his fever dreams. Bella feels miserable about everything, and can't shake the feeling that it is all her fault. She should not have come back. If she had not come back, Jacob would still be alive, and that battle might have taken a different turn, because Edward would not have been preoccupied with her, and everything might still be fine.

Thus, she agrees with Edward. They have to follow the English and bring back Jasper. It is the least she can do, and if she needs to give her life for Jasper, then so be it. Only Alice is against it, and it is obvious that this pains her immensely. But Alice is soft and sweet; Bella is neither of these things. Especially not now, not with the blood of three men on her hands. She retches again as she remembers the general's eyes, imploring her to spare him, and desperate to live.

"Bella..." Edward's eyes fly open two seconds after he speaks Bella's name. "Bella..."
She grips his hand. "It will all be fine." she tells him, smiling a thin smile. "I promise, Edward. I promise." He smiles weakly at her.

"You're beautiful," he tells her, his voice hazy and light, "you're still so beautiful. Don't leave me again, Bella. Bella.

She takes his hand into hers and kisses it reverently. "I won't," she lies.

She leaves two hours after that, as darkness descends, while Alice is collecting berries. She cannot go without explanation, though – they will be worried sick, no doubt. Maybe Alice will even attempt something stupid. But Bella wants Alice to stay with Edward and nurse him back to health, to make him forget the whip and the fever and Jasper. So she leaves a little folded piece of paper for Alice.

Alice,

You are a true and good friend. I will atone for my mistakes. Do not look for me. Return to your village. Take care of Edward for me.

B.

Bella is not sure if Alice will do as she is told, but she doesn't see any other possibility. If she tells Alice of her plan, Alice will stop her. With good reason: it is a breakneck and precipitous plan with little chances for success. But even these little chances, Bella argues to herself, are better than no chances, and so she will take them; but Alice would not understand. And so she steals away under the cover of the thick darkness that seems to be as much part of this forest as its trees and animals.

It takes Bella almost a full week to find the English train. As she quickly discovers, the security has been tightened, and it is near to impossible to get close to any of the high-profile hostages. She follows the army south, south, ever south. Weeks pass, then one full month and she realizes she is in London. It does not look like the London she is used to, but there's Big Ben and the House of Parliament, and even if Bella is American, she did enjoy some basic schooling, thank you very much. She finds out that a trial will be held for the leaders of the Scottish uprising. There is a Jasper on the list of those to be tried. If they find him guilty, well... Bella is aware of the punishment for treason. She can't let that happen. If this were another time, she might put all of her energy into finding the best defense attorney for Jasper; but she doubts that a trial for attempted treason in the eighteenth century will be fair in any way. The judgement has been made already, even though it has not been spoken yet. So she has to find another way. Could she break into jail? The traitors are kept in the Tower, she finds out, and although she has some confidence in her jail-breaking skills, she would rather not waste her life on a suicide mission.

So Bella bides her time, and waits. She talks to many of the Scottish people in the city, workers and merchants and fishermen from Glasgow or Edinburgh. They are not pleased about these happenings. She delves deeper into the belly of the city, finds those who would see Parliament burn and the King with it, who would install a Republic or a theocracy, who would grant full independence to Scotland. She finds all the people who might lend their ears for her cause, and collects them like little dolls around her, propped up and waiting to be played with, and when the day of the trial comes, she is finished with waiting. The trial is held publicly, of course. Every man, woman and child is supposed to see these men get their just trial, and afterwards, their punishment: the men will be hung, drawn and quartered. Bella attends the trial too – and she brings her beautiful collection with her.

A huge wooden platform has been erected in the middle of a beautiful square. Trees line it, thick old oaks that must have watched a thousand unjust trials. Maybe they have even served as a tree to hang traitors from. Jasper is on top of the platform, along with six men Bella doesn't recognize. There is one judge, one attorney and five lawyers. It does not take long. The men are found guilty after only ten minutes or less. The judge with a, to be fair, truly magnificent wig proclaims the punishment: death for all!

No, thinks Bella, she will not let this happen. "Freedom for Scotland!" she shouts, and then suddenly, the crowd is awash with yelling, screaming, the Scottish flag, and kilts. All of the supporters for the Scottish cause, whatever their motivations, are there, screaming, waving cloth and throwing eggs, demanding a fair trial and freedom for Scotland and a new Kingdom and whatever else they desire. Bella does not care about any of it. She cares only about Jasper on the stand, who looks bewildered and earnestly confused at this outpouring of support; she does not let him out of her sight. While the crowd riots, she sneaks off onto the platform, with her trusted Swiss army knife, frees Jasper and then, for good measure, the other men too, and then steals away with him, back into the crowd.

It would have all worked out perfectly, she thinks, they would have fled back to Scotland according to the brilliant escape plan Bella hatched a few days prior, but then in the middle of the crowd she runs into a man, looks up, and sees Edward's face peering down at her.

"What are you doing here?!" she yells at him, in order to be understood over the clamor of the crowd. "You're- what?"

"Is this the time?" Jasper asks, the bewilderment still very present on his expression. Around them, all hell is breaking loose. There is screaming and howling, and so many things are being thrown around, from rotten eggs to shoes. A tomato hits Jasper's chin and leaves an ugly red stain. Bella does not doubt that very soon, bullets will follow these eggs, shoes and tomatoes. She feels vaguely sorry that she has brought all these people into this mess, but then, they have all come here because of their own free will, decided to support a cause they believe in, isn't that right? If Bella nudged them in the right direction and organized everything a bit, then that doesn't automatically give her any responsibility over the lives of these people.

"It's not the time," she agrees with him, steps aside, and begins to make her way through the crowd, knowing that the two men will follow her. They make it out just in time, and while they're running down a narrow alleyway, Bella can hear shots ringing out behind them. She prays no-one will be hit, but somehow doesn't believe in it. But this is different than Jacob's death. These people knew what they were doing; Jacob was gullible and naive.

She shoves him out of her thoughts and stops at a crossroads to catch her breath. Edward catches up to her, then Jasper, and suddenly she feels like crying.

"Edward," she says, out of breath, and he surges forward to kiss her. It feels as if she has not kissed him in a million years or longer, and it's new and exciting agaim and sends hot shivers down her back. She desperately presses him against her and kisses him with everything she has to give.

"I'm still here, you know," Jasper says, obviously uncomfortable. "Could we postpone this for later, too, please?"

"You don't actually live in the moment, huh? It's always later this, later that, later ask Edward, later kiss Edward," Bella tells him, but she's grinning. They're both alive! No, all three of them, even better! "Why are you here, Edward? Why aren't you with Alice!" It is more of an accusation than a question. The last time she saw Edward, he was sick and weak and unable to so much as lift his little finger. Now he looks as pale as ever, but healthy and strong again. Perhaps traveling is good for a man like Edward? Who knows. After all, Bella is not actually a doctor, she's just studying to become one.

Edward looks at her with a serious, if concentrated expression, as if they were talking about a particularly vexing maths issue. "I followed you. It is right to save Jasper, and all these other men too. And... I needed to see you." He looks betrayed, in a way, and Bella doesn't understand why. Hasn't she just saved his brother-in-law? Why is he looking at her like this? She looks straight into his eyes, then she drops her gaze.

"What next, Bella?" Jasper asks, and Bella is grateful that he interrupts the uncomfortable silence. "They are going to look for us."

Bella smiles at him. "Do not worry, I have a good plan and it will work out fine. Let's go to the docks."

It does not, in the end, turn out to work out fine. Nothing works fine. For one, Bella did not know that there would be three of them when she hatched her plan. She originally planned to stow away on a merchant ship about to leave port in one hour, but the space she scooped out would not fit three grown adults. Second, Edward keeps looking at her with hurt in his eyes, and it makes her as much uncomfortable as it frustrates her. They need to talk about this, but they can't as they are rushing through the streets, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible, and so her mood sours further with every step. Third, Edward has obviously not come prepared. Bella is wearing an appropriate dress, brown and gray and altogether boring, and it allows her to become a part of the background. For Jasper, she has brought an old dirty suit, the kind that is worn by thousands of men in this city during their daily struggle. But Edward.. everyone looks at Edward, tall Edward with his soft hair, piercing eyes, and worst of all, his goddamn kilt! Why is he wearing a kilt?! The police are looking for fugitives that support the Scottish cause, and here he is wearing a bright red kilt. They might just as well walk up to the police, present them their hands, and declare themselves arrested. And people look at him, and as expected, after two or three blocks, Bella gets the feeling that they are being followed. She walks faster, but the feeling only intensifies instead of lessening.

"Do you feel that too?" she asks the other two. Jasper nods, Edward stares straight ahead at the street.

"Someone's after us," Jasper replies. "Should we start running?"

Bella grits her teeth. On the one hand, running means they might get away; on the other, it will attract unwanted attention. She is torn, and then Edward takes her hand, albeit he seems to hesitate a moment before gripping it tightly. "Come," he says, breaks into a sprint, and Jasper follows them. Three men, wearing the tell-tale clothes of old-time policemen, break out of an alley and run after them. They make a lot of noise and draw considerate attention. "Stop!" one of them yells. "You are under arrest for conspiring to treason and public rioting!"

"We know!" Bella yells back. The policeman seems taken aback for a moment, but then just follows them more vigorously. Miraculously, they make their way down to the docks unharmed, but then the second problem appears – there's not enough space on the ship Bella has chosen for all three of them. Think fast, she tells herself, think fast.

"Jasper," she calls, "there, hide. I paid the captain a nice penny to hide in a barrel. They'll bring you straight to Edinburgh, and from there you can get home safe."

Jasper nods curtly. "And you?" he asks her. Bella throws a look behind her. In the distance, she can see policemen searching through the people at the port. She grits her teeth. But Edward's hand is warm around hers.

"We will get by."

Jasper embraces her, thanks her, embraces Edward, and says he will pray every day that they will see each other again. Then he is gone, and Bella and Edward run, once again.

Bella only finds the courage to begin whispering to Edward when the ship has set sail and one hour has passed. They are true stowaways now, Bella has not paid the captain to hide on this random ship, and they have to be quiet. If they're found, it is their end. But the waves are wild and stormy, the sailors are busy with keeping the ship under control, and Bella and Edward will not be overheard.

Bella tries to kiss him again, but Edward turns his face away. They are cramped together in a little space between some barrels filled with stinking fish. Bella admits that it's not the most romantic place in the world, but still... "What's wrong?" she asks.

Edward makes that horrible face again, as if she had betrayed him. "You left," he says, his voice low and raw with emotion. "You left after you promised you wouldn't leave again. I waited five years. Seven before I gave you up for good. And now, you just left me again, just ran off for another man."

Bella has the sense to flush red with shame, but she doesn't consider this as the catastrophe Edward tries to paint it as. Those were promises made to a feverish man; back then, she thought he would not even hear her, much less remember her words. She stares at the wooden ground. It rises and falls with the waves and it suddenly makes her nauseous.

"I had to do this alone," she finally, quietly, tells him. "I had to prove I'm not a murderer."

Edward wears a frown as he is looking at her. "But-"

Bella shakes her head. "I am. A murderer. I killed that soldier and the general who – who did those things to you. And Jacob." Oh, that is the worst murder of all. Bella can feel her voice quivering and breaking while she speaks. "I did not pull the trigger but I... I still did it. I brought him into this horrible time. He didn't even know! He can't fight. He was an idiot, but he was my idiot. I swore to protect him in my vows and I – I killed him."

Edward is quiet for a long while and Bella doesn't speak either. She feels like she has nothing else to say; but she does not truly know what Edward will say. Bella expects him to tell her she isn't a killer, that she is soft-hearted and kind and she is not responsible for Jacob's death. It would be what she would tell someone; what she would tell anyone but herself, because she can lie to other people but not to herself. When he does finally speak, his words surprise Bella.

"Come here," he tells her and she does. He's sitting with his legs spread on the ground and she scoots up so that she leans against him, her back against his chest. She can feel his warmth emanating from his body and oh, dear Lord, he is warm, so very, very warm. "We are all murderers, we are all killers. This harsh, cruel world leaves us no choice. A few of us are not, but the cleaner their hands, the bloodier ours become. People like you and me, Bella. If you had not killed that man, I would be dead now. Is that fair?"

Yes, Bella thinks. "I don't know," she says. Who can weigh one man's life for another's? But Edward is so immensely warm behind her, and when she turns around to look him into his eyes, she knows that she would kill another thousand men for this one single soul. Edward nods. "None of us know, only the Lord."

Bella smiles a lopsided grin. She has never been a believer, but just the fact that she knows Edward kind of makes her want to believe in something. In him. In goodness. In humanity, maybe. Or love. "I should have kept my promise," she admits. "I apologize."

Edward raises his eyebrows. "You know I will have to punish you for that." Bella laughs softly, but there's a gleam in his eyes that tells her this wasn't much of a joke at all. She smiles at him.

"You wanted to be with me? While I traveled south? It was a long and arduous road, I'll admit that. And lonely." Her hand strokes his arm. Edward stays stoic, but there's a slight blush appearing on his cheeks.

"I did," he replies curtly while she continues touching him. "I want to be with you for a long time."

Bella feels her heart beating wildly in her chest. "Me too," she admits, "but... are we... should we...? I mean. I just killed my husband, basically. It is a bit early to start something new." The smile she wears with these words is macabre and it does not please her, but how else to respond to such horrendous circumstances? "But I could get used to having you around. Killer boyfriend and girlfriend. We could be Bonnie and Clyde."

Edward looks at her, confused. "What do these words mean?" he asks. Bella's smile turns softer again.

The ship arrives at another port one hour later. Bella and Edward wait one more hour until they dare to come out of their hideout, in order to evade the sailors. Their strategy seems to be working; there is no-one around and the sky is pitch-black, dark with a cloudy night. No stars, no moon to guide their way over the wet wood, and they still try to be as quiet as possible. When there is solid stone beneath her feet again, Bella has the sudden urge to kiss it, but remembers that this is still the eighteenth century and that the stone ground is thus probably covered in shit, cholera and probably the plague too. Besides, there is someone much nicer to kiss by her side.

They steal through the port until they arrive at a well-lit building. It's probably a sailor's bar or something like that, Bella muses. There's light and noise coming from inside, mingling with the lapping of the ocean's waves outsides, and a rotting wooden sign hangs from above the door. There is no name on the sign, only a hand-drawn crude picture of a kraken. It's kind of funny and it makes Bella laugh, despite all the horrible things that have happened to her.

"Let's go in," she says; Edward obviously has his doubts, though.

"It's not safe for a woman," he says. Bella scoffs but then remembers that this is a different time; maybe this really is not a safe place for her. She grabs Edward's arm.

"Good thing I'm not alone, then," she says and they enter the bar.

Booming voices and the smell of wine and piss greet them the moment Edward opens the door. Bella makes a face, but Edward stays completely stoic. He taps on the shoulder of one of the closest sailors. The man turns around to face him. He has a gaunt and haggard face and looks as if he has not slept in days. There are red marks all over his face. Insect bites, most likely, or mayhaps pox marks, Bella cannot be sure.

"Quoi?" the man murmurs. A pool of silence builds around them, encapsulating Bella, Edward, the sailor and the men sitting closest to him. "Qu'est-ce vous voulez?" the sailor asks and Bella feels color drain from her face.

The ship brought them further away from home than either of them thought.