Chapter 8 - Doing What I Want

*June 10th (4 ½ months)*

Renesmee's POV

Charlie looked up from where he was strapping on his gun in the kitchen, took one look at me and sighed.

"Seriously Renesmee."

"People are talking about me anyways, and half the rumours are more outlandish than the truth. I'd rather set the record straight." I zipped up my jacket, pretending not to care how it clung to my form, and kissed him on the cheek. "Besides, you're the one who was always encouraging me to make my own fun."

"Maybe this is too much fun Renesmee." Charlie tried to persuade as I opened the door. He looked at Bella for help.

'Don't look at me, I helped her pick it." Bella shrugged, tying her laces, and Charlie sent a glance upwards, begging for the patience to deal with his daughters.

Bella and I said our goodbyes and headed out the door. It was drizzling lightly and Bella stood on the porch waiting.

"Do you wanna ride with us?" She asked. Edward sat in his Volvo at the end of the driveway. As if he'd heard her, Edward sent what I assumed was a welcoming wave. I smiled politely in response.

"Nah, I think I'm gonna take my truck. Jake and I are going to the store after school. We have a brownie craving"

Bella nodded, got into Edward's car and they drove off.

Despite my bravado with Charlie my hands shook on the ten minute drive to school. Usually I turned on the radio or connected my phone but today the drive was filled with my muttered attempts at a pep talk.

"You got this Ness. You're a strong, independent badass and nothing can dull your sparkle." Was the last thing out of my mouth as I pulled into a spot in the car park. I took one more deep breath before grabbing my bag off the seat beside me and getting out of my truck.

'It must be my lucky day', I thought as I shut and locked the door. Jessica and Lauren had seen me pull in and were en route to my truck. Not wanting them to be the first people I dealt with today I sent them a quick wave and bolted, but not before I saw Lauren glance down at my now visible stomach and smirk.

'Bitch', I thought walking into the building. The hallway was full of students milling and talking and getting stuff out of lockers before homeroom. My heart was thumping in my chest, my nerves bring a familiar feeling of nausea.

I took a deep breath in an attempt to bring my heart rate down a little. I figured a heart rate that fast couldn't be good for the baby.

At the moment no one was looking at me but I figured that would change pretty quickly. I unzipped my jacket, and because I figured in for a penny, in for a pound, dramatically flipped the sides back.

Eyes began to flick my way, and when those people saw me they very unsubtly began tapping their friends to get a peek as well. I nodded to myself, mentally reinforced my sparkle and began striding with faus confidence down the hall, flaunting my grey fitted "Baby On Board' t shirt for the Forks High masses.

With Forks High's very active rumour mill I was sure the official confirmation of my pregnancy would be headline news by lunch. The only problem left was how to get people to stop thinking it was Edward's.

I got to my locker and opened it, firmly ignoring the piercing whispers around me. I could practically feel them weighing down on me. My heart was still pounding and I reminded myself that the worst was over. The news would die down eventually.

"Renesmee!" I was surprised that Lauren and Jessica had followed me inside. "You walked away so quickly we thought something was wrong." Lauren's smile was all fake concern, but there was a genuine wrinkle of worry in Jess' brow.

I sent her a grateful smile, grabbing my books for before lunch. I closed the locker and turned to face them so they could get a glimpse of my shirt. "I'm fine, why?"

Jess' jaw dropped, and I could almost swear Lauren's eyes began to twinkle.

"Well, we're glad you're fine. We should get to homeroom right, Jess?" She said, grabbing Jess by the arm and dragging her down the hallway.

'Fucking bitch', I amended in my head before I too made my way to homeroom.

SA **** SA

If the disapproving looks from my teachers when they found out I was pregnant were bad, then I didn't know what to call the looks I got when they saw what I was wearing. And while I was nervous about telling the entire student body, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I had gotten sick of feeling judged by adults and found that the only thing that looks made me feel was annoyed.

I sighed, making my way to lunch. I walked past a gaggle of whispering and laughing girls and felt my chest squeeze a little. I didn't get what the big deal was considering my pregnancy shouldn't really have been big news. That was one of the more popular rumours.

When I walked into the cafeteria it felt like that movie moment when the girl walks in and the whole room goes silent. I entered, everyone paused for a beat and then everyone seemed to talk at once. I'd never been so popular.

Maybe I should have listened to Charlie's warning.

I ducked my head, as if that would take the attention off, and got in line for lunch. I was so focused on 'laying low' (as if I hadn't put up a billboard saying look at me this morning (God I'm stupid!)) that I didn't notice Bella get into line behind me. I definitely did not jump 10 feet into the air when she put her hand on my shoulder.

Luckily I wasn't holding anything.

"Rough day?" Bella was looking at me sympathetically.

I shrugged a shoulder trying to play off my discomfort. "Nothing I can't handle for a little while. This'll be old news soon." And I knew it would be but that didn't make the present any easier to stomach.

Bella gave me a consoling pat on the back and I gave her a grateful smile, happy to have her support on what was quickly becoming worst day of my life #7. I sighed and made my way along the lunch buffet. Feeling anxious all day had left me starving and I grabbed a small mountain of food. Before I could pay Edward stepped in front of me, buying all three lunches.

Before I could protest being perfectly capable of buying my own food Edward cut me off.

"You seemed like you could use a treat."

I nodded, but didn't say thank you. Semi-amicable or not, we weren't besties and I still felt like he owed me.

I followed Bella and Edward to their table, figuring I might get the least questions there.

Jessica, Angela, Ben, and the other Cullen's were already sat at the table and I sighed in relief that Lauren wasn't in attendance. Conversation stuttered as I sat down between Bella and Ben, the Cullen's opposite me.

I avoided everyone's eyes, unwrapping my burger and taking a bite but my appetite had all but disappeared. From the corner of my eye I could see Angela elbow Ben.

"So," Ben started awkwardly, and I braced myself to be asked about the baby. "Did anyone understand a thing from Larc's class or was it just me."

And just like the tension and the table broke, and everyone resumed bitching about the impossibility of biology.

I looked up and saw Angela smiling at me. It seemed like today was a day of grateful smiles. I managed to eat some food to the sound of normal, not about me, conversation, though I didn't really join in. That was until Mike came over.

"You really know how to get the rumor mill turning, don't ya." There was laughter in his voice as I felt his hand come down on my shoulder.

The conversation stopped once more.

"Mike!" Angela snapped at him, "seriously! What is wrong with you?"

"What?" He sounded genuinely confused as he sat down at the table, a seat between him and Rosalie. "Why wear the shirt if you don't wanna talk about it." He looked around the table for support and was met with a mostly frosty silence.

"I agree with Mike." Lauren sat down across from him, and I seriously began to question what I'd done in a past life. "Unless you have something to hide?"

At that I frowned. From the moment Mike had arrived I'd been staring resolutely at the wall behind Alice's head, but I looked at Lauren now who had a smug smirk on her face. She looked pointedly between me, Bella and Edward, and I knew exactly what was on her mind.

I scoffed at her and considered ignoring it, but I saw Mike draw the same conclusion. I looked to my right thinking at least Angela and Ben didn't actually believe this ridiculous rumor only so see both of them glance at each other and look down guiltily.

I looked round the table in shock realising that everyone except Bella and the Cullen's though I was fucking my sister's boyfriend behind her back and was about to have his baby. Edward, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett looked vaguely amused, Rosalie looked disgusted and Bella looked confused.

"Really guys? You too!" I was so shocked I forgot to be anxious. "It's not his. You don't know the guy, he goes to the Quileute highschool."

"Not who's?" Bella looked at me for clarification and I was a little awed at how out of Fork's loop she was.

"Don't worry about it." I said, figuring it was for the best, and went back to eating.

Lauren opened her mouth, probably to fish for more information. Before she got the chance Angela cut in and I seriously considered buying her a pony.

"Have you guys figured out which colleges you're applying for?"

Maybe not.

Lauren scowled but answered anyways. "I'm gonna try for Florida State. They have a pretty good cosmetology programme."

The others rattled of answers and a discussion broke out that I tried not to focus on. I had felt upset when Jake shut me out about not going to college, but sitting at this table I could see now why he didn't wanna talk about it. I'd never really thought about it outright but at some point in the last few months I had realised that college was gonna have to wait for me. Perhaps I'd never get the chance to go.

College was hard enough without a baby.

"What about you Ness?"

"Hmm?" I blinked at Angela, wondering if I'd missed a change in conversation.

"You still thinking about being a writer? I think I remember you saying you wanted to apply to Berkley?"

I did want to go Berkley. I had spoken to Angela about it because she worked for the school paper.

"Well," I started, taking a sip of water to buy some time for a conversation I didn't want to have. "I don't know about all that now."

I heard Lauren snort at the other end of the table and squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that would help me take whatever snotty comment she had thought up.

"Yeah, babies kinda kill any future you have at 16."

"What's that meant to mean?" I turned at the sound of Bella's voice to see her stare incredulously at Lauren.

"I'm just saying that I wouldn't be having a baby at 16. Seems like a bad life choice, but what do I know." Lauren sent me a snide smirk she tried to disguise as a concerned smile. I tongued my cheek, partly to keep from swearing at her and partly to keep from crying.

"I think it's cool that you're keeping the baby. Not a lot of people would." Everyone turned to Rosalie in what seemed like shock.

It wasn't often one of the Cullens besides Alice spoke up at the table, and even rarer still that it was Rosalie. To be honest I could probably count the number of times she'd spoken on one hand with fingers to spare, let alone times she's spoken to me.

Having no idea how to respond to that but appreciating the sentiment all the same, I smiled at Rosalie, for once not feeling completely terrified by the icy blonde.

Before Lauren could interject with something else venomous Rosalie turned to glare at her, steel in her eyes. For a second Lauren visibly shrank back. Rosalie released her gaze, going back to looking around the cafeteria as though everyone in it were insignificant, and Lauren huffed silently.

The conversation moved on and I was grateful.

SA **** SA

My shoulders sagged in relief as I stuffed my books into my locker. After what was surely worst day of my life #5 I was happy that this part was at least over.

I walked past Lauren and a group of girls I recognised but couldn't name, who all proceeded to giggle at the sight of me and I was this close to growling but realised that would be super weird and wouldn't help my situation and refrained.

I crossed the parking lot, feeling eyes on me as I walked and seriously wondered in the students of Forks high had anything better to do. As I got into my truck I pulled out my phone seeing a message from Jake waiting for me, and felt some of the tension I'd been feeling seep away.

From: B.D

Rdy wnvr u r Nc

Lvng nw

Mt sprmkt

I rolled my eyes at Jake's text. He knew how much I hated text slang and always upped the ante to unreasonable levels, claiming my texts were too uppity. It had sparked somewhat of a war between our text messages.

To: B.D

Dear Jacob Black,

Thank you for your correspondence,

I will indeed convene with you at the supermarket.

It would greatly please me if we met outside the front entrance for our grocery shopping.

I will also be leaving posthaste.

Kindest regards,

Renessmee Swan

P.s Please refrain from referring to me as 'Nc' in future endeavours

Smirking I hit send and started my car, driving out of the parking lot having already forgotten about highschool.

The parking lot at the supermarket was practically empty as I pulled in, six cars dotted around. I spotted Jake by the doors and pulled into a spot nearby to it.

He was leant against the wall by the doors looking at his phone and I took a moment to look at him. He had his leg up, knees poking through the worn holes of his jeans that I don't remember being there before. His thighs were thick, the fabric seeming almost glued to him. He was wearing a baggy black shirt with the sleeves ripped off, his muscular arms looking threatening even though Jake was one of the kindest people I knew.

He looked good, I couldn't deny it. Still all I could think about was what all these changes were for.

I looked up to his face and realised Jake was no longer looking at his phone. Instead he was watching me watching him with a look of confusion on his face.

I stuffed my concern back into its box and smiled at him. All that stress was just gonna give me heartburn anyways.

I got out of the car and swung my bag over my shoulder, only to have it immediately taken off me. I glared at Jake, who only smiled boyishly at me as he put my bag on his own shoulder.

I opened my mouth to protest but Jake was already walking away.

"Let's go!" Jake called over his shoulder at my spluttering and I had no choice but to follow. I wasn't waddling yet, but my little run to catch up was close.

I reached his side just as he walked through the building's sliding doors and grabbed on to my bag's strap that dangled cheerfully from the side.

"What are you doing?" He asked, bemused.

I grabbed a basket from the rack and smiled. "Helping."

He shook his head at my antics before grabbing the basket from my hand, much to my displeasure.

"I can carry things, y'know."

"I know." He said simply, leading me to the baking aisle. "But I'm here so you don't have to."

I tried not to be endeared, but my traitorous face started to blush and I pretended I couldn't see Jake smirking out of the corner of my eye. Instead I started listing all the ingredients we needed in order to distract myself.

We walked around the store, bickering and laughing the whole time.

"... we have sugar, flour, chocolate chips, I have cocoa powder at home." I said, ticking off my fingers as we walked. "We just need eggs."

"To the sugar aisle." Jake announced, fist in the air. I rolled my eyes as we rounded the corner. We stopped in front of the egg shelf and halfway down the aisle was two middle aged women.

"How many eggs do we need?" Jake asked, looking through the shelf. "Ness?" He asked again when I didn't respond.

The voices of the women had caught my ear.

"... You think she'd have some self respect, trouncing around here with that boy." The older looking one said.

"A girl in her condition should have some consideration." The other responded, turning her nose up in my direction.

"Just ignore it Ness." But I barely heard Jake speak. I'd taken too many hits to the sparkle today and before I knew it I was stood before the women.

"Excuse me." I said, looking back and forth between them. "Just what is that supposed to mean?"

The first scoffed indignantly before facing me fully. "I meant exactly what I said. A girl like you has no future and neither does your child."

"Hey!-"

"I'm sure your parents are disappointed enough without you here making an embarrassment of yourself in that shirt."

"You don't know anything about her."

"I know her kind, young man, and yours."

"I'm gonna graduate." Everyone stopped and looked at me. "And I'm gonna go to Berkley and become a writer, because having a kid isn't the end of my future. Our child's gonna have a bright and amazing life because we're gonna give it to them. And I'm gonna do it all to spite you and everyone like you."

Before she could respond I turned my back on them and walked back down the aisle, grabbing a carton of eggs on the way.

I don't really remember lining up to pay, but the next thing I knew I was standing outside.

"Ness?"

"Huh?" I said turning, only to receive a face full of chest. Jake's arms wrapped around me tightly and I returned the hug, breathing in his familiar scent.

"You know she's wrong right?"

I scoffed into my chest and leaned back to look up at my best friend. "Of course she is. We're awesome, and our kid will be too."

Jake smiled at me in a way he hadn't before and it made my mouth dry. His smile flickered for a moment before he turned away to put the bags in my truck.

"You're pretty cool Ness."

"I know." I said, putting the moment out of my mind and climbing into my truck.

"Don't worry Grapefruit, I'll make sure you have a mom you can look up to, no matter how old I am."

"We're not naming our kid Grapefuit, dork." Jake laughed as he slid into the seat next to me.

"Pft, I do what I want."

A/N HELLO! I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS FIC! enjoy :)

Don't let anyone dull your sparkle.