Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, I just decided to play with them for a bit. They are owned by DC Comics, respectively.

Positives Outweigh Negatives

"Anotha' one? Come on!"

The shrill voice of his right hand woman caused The Joker to glance up from the work on his desk deep inside the dilapidated old theater in the middle of Arkham City. The few moments of silence following caused him to shrug and look back over his plans.

"No, no, no! How come they're all the same?"

This time The Joker groaned.

"What could she possibly be going on about?" He sneered. "Her whiny meltdowns are the last thing that we need tonight! Harley! Get in-"

The Joker's last sentence was cut short by a coughing fit.

At the mention of her name, Harley Quinn began walking towards The Joker's office. At the sound of her beloved's racking cough, she began to run.

The Joker was recovering from the exhausting fit when Harley walked through the door. She was at his side in a second.

"Poor Mistah J, are ya okay? I'm so sorry that my yellin' disturbed your work. I didn't mean to, honest Puddin', I didn't!"

"Enough with the apologies, Harley. Just tell me what was causing all of your unnecessary outbursts. You know that your problems are the last thing on my mind at the moment!"

The Joker stood up from his desk so quickly that he knocked over his chair. He was just about to continue his rant to a now cowering Harley when another cough shook violently through him. Harley eased off the floor and ran to gently pat his back and stroke his vibrant green head.

"Oh, Sweetie, I was just getting' a little mad at somethin', that's all," Harley admitted.

The Joker rolled his eyes and cleared his throat. He responded to Harley through gritted teeth.

"Tell me what you were mad about, Harley. What was so damn offensive to you that you had to interrupt my work? Tell me, Harley!"

"All my pregnancy tests were negative!"

Harley's blue eyes were glistening with unshed tears. She looked positively heartbroken, whereas The Joker just looked confused.

"The hell did you take a pregnancy test for, girl? You tryin' to sneak a kid on me?" He raged.

"I wasn't tryin' to sneak anythin' on ya, Sweetie! I mean it. I was just checkin' 'cause I felt a little funny. I started thinkin' that a little Joker junior could be a nice addition, but I didn't stop takin' my pill or nothin', Puddin'. I wouldn't do that to ya on purpose!"

"You better not have. We don't need a snotty little brat runnin' around here. They're too much work, and take up too much time, ya know? I'm far too old, too sick, and have far too much to do. I might not get to torture The Bat much longer…"

The Joker trailed off, and Harley thought she saw the tiniest hint of real sadness in his eyes. She let a few of her own tears fall as The Joker glared out the grimy window. Walking tentatively toward her love's lanky frame, she latched her arms around his waist and clasped her dainty hands together. She buried her head into his purple pinstriped back and breathed in the comforting familiar scent that was so soothing to her.

The Joker hadn't moved an inch, letting Harley enjoy this rare moment. He let out a slow, deep sigh and placed his large right hand over Harley's clasped ones.

Harley turned her head so she could solemnly murmur, "I'm so sorry, Sweetie, so, so sorry."

The Joker squeezed Harley's delicate hands and spoke an almost inaudible, "it's okay, Sweets. I just got to thinkin' that I'm not gonna be here much longer. I won't be able to spread all of my joy anymore."

He ended with the saddest chuckle Harley had ever heard from him.

"It's okay, Mistah J," she soothed, tightening her embrace.

Dropping their hands, The Joker turned around slowly and looked Harley in the eyes. He hated to admit it, but he actually felt vulnerable. He didn't like the idea of a Joker-less Gotham. He had trained Harley well enough, she could really handle some things, but the lackeys sure couldn't. He needed a real heir. Someone to take on the Clown Prince title once he was gone.

Bringing her hand up to gently caress his face, Harley brought her clown out of his stupor. The Joker actually leaned into her touch and once again brought his hand to hers. He looked into Harley's pristine blue pools and cautiously stated something he never thought he would.

"Perhaps a baby wouldn't be the worst thing."

Harley was taken aback. The smallest smile crept across her lips.

"Y-You mean that, Sweetie?"

The Joker smiled back and responded, "yeah. Half me and half you? He'd be perfect! Or she, I suppose. I mean, as much as I hate to admit it, I'm not gonna be here much longer."

"Stop it!" Harley chided, lightly tapping him on the chest.

"Well, it's true Harls! An heir is a good idea, don't'cha think? A new little Clown Prince or Princess to carry on Daddy's legacy."

A single tear rolled down Harley's cheek once The Joker was finished speaking. She was legitimately touched.

"Okay. If that's what you want, Puddin', then that's what I want, too. A new Prince or Princess is a great idea."

She stood on her tiptoes and placed the lightest kiss on The Joker's bright red lips. He returned the kiss and wrapped his arms around her in an embrace. The couple broke apart from their kiss and The Joker got a glint in his eye.

"So, Toots, you sure all those pregnancy tests were negative?" He asked.

Harley thought for a moment and right when she was going to answer yes, she remembered, "well, there actually is one I haven't checked yet. I laid it on the counter right when you yelled for me earlier. Maybe it's not! It's supposed to be a super accurate one, too!" She squealed.

Harley ran to check the test and returned within a minute. When she appeared again The Joker stopped his pacing and looked towards his girlfriend, waiting, longing.

A massive grin threatened to split Harley's face in two. "Positive! It's positive, Puddin'!"

The Joker's smile matched the mother of his child's. Harley ran into his arms and The Clown Prince spun his Princess around before kissing her once more. As Harley snuggled into The Joker's chest, he spoke to her with more sincerity than he ever thought he could muster.

"Thank you, Harley. Thank you."