Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, nor any places, things, characters, or ideas therein. The aforementioned belong to Masashi Kishimoto, Viz Media, Shounen Jump, and TV Tokyo, etc. I am writing this fic for enertainment purposes only, not monetary gain.

Summary: Uchiha Hinata had endured many embarrassing moments in her life. But none of them came close to going into labor on live TV. :Sasuke x Hinata:

Rating: T

Warnings: Slightly graphic childbirth contnent, and a kiss

Pairing(s): Sasuke/Hinata, Neji/Tenten

Universe: AU

Spoilers: None

Dedication: To my mother, whose musings one day at the dinner table gave me this wonderful plot bunny. So here's your Valentine's gift from me - I hope you enjoy it!

Author's Note: One day at the dinner table, my mother started musing aloud. There's a bit of a baby boom on our favorite jewelry television channel, and knowing how much she adores SasuHina, combined with her comment, "I wonder what would happen if she went into labor on live TV?" made this plot bunny come to life in my head. And what could I do but write it, and gift it to her for Valentine's Day? I hope you all enjoy reading this fic, and thanks for doing so!

*~Priceless~*

.:fyd818:.

The twinges were getting worse.

Uchiha Hinata hid her grimace as she settled herself into the big black leather swivel chair behind the main desk in the studio, smoothing down the front of her floaty Boho-style maternity top. To her right, an iPad with the schedule for her four hours on live TV sat next to four printouts; to her left, an open 50-ring box displayed the jewelry she'd be presenting in her first hour.

As soon as she was comfortable, she slid off her shoes under the desk and adjusted the earpiece in her ear. She caught the last few seconds of the commentary of the presenter, director, and producer team before her as Yamanaka Ino sauntered across the studio from the rectangular stand to the right, where she'd been presenting her last piece of jewelry.

Another twinge shot through Hinata's very obviously pregnant belly as she and Ino hugged each other. "Some great deals," the blonde said with a grin. "What've you got coming up, Hina?"

Pulling the box closer to her and ignoring the changeover of camera people happening only a few feet away, Hinata picked up her favorite piece and held it out to Ino. "That's the Hinata's Hot Deal this hour," she said. "A two-carat triple-A tanzanite solitaire, accented with G-to-H grade, ice white, certified diamonds on the shoulders." She'd fought the channel manager long and hard to get that ring into her shift, considering the crazy prices tanzanite was suffering in the industry, and her own father's experience the last time he'd tried to source some at the Hong Kong gem fair. It hadn't been pretty, and Hyuuga Hiashi had come home without buying tanzanite: a first in the ten-years-strong company's history. The meeting he'd then called forced them do a radical shift, making tanzanite a rarity in their falling auctions whereas it had been a staple of their shows in the past, with several pieces per hour, and even entire showcases.

It was quite worrisome, especially considering the gemstone was one of their bestsellers.

Ino cooed and slid the ring onto her hand, slipping it forward over the lighted desktop so Camera 1 could zoom in. "Look at those pinks!" she squealed. "What quantity have you got?"

"Only twelve ever made, and it's in 14 karat white gold, too." Hinata unobstrusively slid her free hand over her lower belly, wishing the discomfort would go away. This was her next-to-last shift before she went on maternity leave; and while her four hours on screen usually flew by, she had a feeling this was going to be a long day.

Sasuke, her husband and the man currently operating Camera 2, caught her motion and raised his dark eyebrows at her. Hinata shook her head once, sharply, before turning to Ino, who was handing the tanzanite ring back. He'd tried to talk her into starting her maternity leave two weeks earlier, but she hadn't listened. Since her family owned and operated the company, she felt the need to work as long as she could before she left, even if only temporarily.

Ignoring Sasuke's frown of concern, Hinata accepted the ring back and said brightly, "Other than this ring, everything in the hour is under $50. I've got amethyst, opals, and get this, ruby coming up! It's going to be incredible." And it would, if Junior would just take a nap like he usually did while his mama was on screen. But for some reason today he was being extra active, as if to be stubborn. Just like his papa, Hinata thought with amusement.

Ino clapped her hands. "I'm going to run home and watch, since I noticed you have a Sri Lankan sapphire hour coming up later. I've been wanting to get another, so I'm going to go pop online at home." After hugging Hinata one last time, Ino picked up her water bottle from beneath the counter and waved to the cameras, her long, heavy blonde ponytail swinging from side to side. "See you all tomorrow! 'Bye!"

Here we go. Pushing a loose lock of her blue-black hair behind her ear, Hinata fully faced the camera and smiled. "Hi, everyone! Thanks for joining me today. I've got a great show lined up for you, kicking things off with an under $50 hour right now. If you've never met me before, I'm Hyuuga Hinata." Her father had convinced her to keep her maiden name while she was on air, due to her close ties with the company, but the name still felt weird falling off her lips two years after she became Uchiha Hinata. "With us on the cameras, we've got my wonderful husband, Uchiha Sasuke, and Uzumaki Naruto." She paused while the two men waved for the camera mounted on the wall in the corner close to the entrance of the gallery, then smoothly continued her introductions when the one in the gallery itself took over. Keeping her eyes fixed on the monitor screen set up for her to the left and slightly to the rear of her camera crew, displaying what the viewers at home saw, she said, "And we've got a treat for you today. My cousin Neji's in the chair producing! He's the company's graduate gemologist and a channel manager, so you're going to see some great deals today. Directing is his lovely wife, Tenten. Give us a wave!"

Another twinge rippled across her stomach, and she felt her smile stiffen a little as Naruto motioned the camera was back on her. Oh, yes, this is going to be a very long day. Reaching out, she snatched up the first item for auction and slid it onto her finger. "Let's get started, shall we? First up, we have this beautiful Zambian amethyst ring."

Apparently, Junior didn't like amethyst, for it felt like he head-butted her bladder. Hiding her free hand under the table, she clenched her fingers into a fist. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this!

Sweat was starting to bead along Hinata's hairline, and it had nothing to do with the studio lights glaring down upon her. The twinges in her stomach had turned into full-on cramps by the end of her first hour; now, nearing the completion of her second, Hinata was about ready to double over in pain.

But the cameras were rolling, and there were millions of people across the globe watching. She was coming into their prime-time hours, when more jewelry was bought than any other hours during the day, and Hinata couldn't dare let herself let on that she was in pain.

"That," she said with another smile (which started to feel more and more plastic as time wore on), "was a great deal. Let me tell you this - we couldn't replace those earrings for that price. Wow."

Neji's voice sounded in her ear, and he seemed tense. "Number twelve next. Are you okay? Do we need to cut to break?"

Hinata flicked her wrist in a quick, negative motion, making it part of her reach for the next item of jewelry. Only two more pieces before the next scheduled break, anyway, and then she could get a drink and walk around the studio for a minute or two. Hopefully then the cramps would ease and she could finish up her last two hours in relative comfort. "Up next we have number twelve - ooh, this is pretty." She tilted the ring toward the cameras, cradling it between the index fingers and thumbs of both her hands. "This is one of my personal favorite gemstones. It's the epitome of feminine grace and beauty, with its soft pinks and peaches, a stone perfect for telling someone you love them."

She tilted the ring, allowing the light to play off the stone. "This is very rare, very exclusive. We haven't been able to buy this gemstone for the past few months, seeing as the prices have gone up nearly 300% in only six months. This is your Zambezia morganite, and it is beautiful." Hinata smiled as she watched the white zircon on the shoulders sparkle and reflect rainbow colors back at her. "It's in 10 karat rose gold, and accented with white zircon. As you can see on your screens right now, our start price is $527 - but we're not staying there long."

Another pain rippled though her abdomen, and she had to bite back a groan. Hinata took a moment to be thankful the camera was focusing on the ring instead of her, or else everyone watching would have seen the flinch she couldn't quite hide. Drawing in a deep, slightly shaky breath, she went on, "If you like this ring, I'm going to be crashing this price in thirty seconds. I've only got 35 rings in this auction, which is everything we have left in the vault, and from the looks of who's already called in and put this in their baskets online, that is not going to be enough to go around. I've got sizes seven through ten left, so if you want your size, please dial now. I'm down to twenty-three, and I haven't even dropped the price yet!"

This time the pain came so hard and fast, she gasped into her mic. Sasuke's head appeared around the camera, his night-black eyes wide in alarm, but Hinata forced a smile onto her face and shook her head. "The price we're going to on this is incredible!" Even though it wasn't time yet, on her screen she saw Neji dropping the price, undoubtedly to cover for her gasp. "One-hundred-twenty-seven dollars! That, my dear viewers, is every single dollar we can take off this beautiful, beautiful ring. If I'm not mistaken - Neji, is that our cost price?"

Neji's voice in her ear said tensely, "Close to it. Hinata, are you sure you're okay? Tenten can cut to commercial if you need to."

Before Hinata could say anything further, the next pain hit. She didn't think it was possible, but this one was ten times worse than the ones preceding it. And, to add insult to injury, along with the pain came something she'd not been expecting for at least another week.

Unable to stop the cry of pain from escaping her lips, Hinata leaned as far forward as the desk allowed her and grabbed at her stomach. "Excuse me!" she gasped breathlessly. "But I-I'm afraid I-" another pain "-I've just g-gone into labor."

She heard Neji frantically calling for commercial in her ear as Sasuke darted out from behind Camera 2 and shot around the counter. She leaned against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, demanding, "Now? The baby's coming now?"

"My water just broke," Hinata said from between her teeth. "I've been having pains ever since before we went on air, but I honestly just thought they were Braxton-Hicks, and I could make it through the show."

"Tenten's calling for an ambulance right now," Neji said through her earpiece. "Oh, whoa."

Hinata's head came up at the last part, and she craned her neck to see through the window into the gallery. "What? What's wrong? Did the system crash?" It would be just what they needed right now: a crashed system and their presenter in labor halfway through her scheduled four hours. And right before the Sri Lankan sapphire hour, too.

She wondered if Ino was still watching, and would be too disappointed if she didn't get the piece she wanted.

Dimly realizing she was having very strange and slightly hysterical thoughts, she leaned against Sasuke as he helped her out of the chair. "My shoes," she whispered.

"Leave 'em," Sasuke half-growled. He sounded very close to panicking, which was strange, because he never panicked. Not even that once, when Lee accidentally set the studio on fire when he used a lighter to demonstrate the color change qualities of a Tunduru sapphire bracelet. Sasuke had kept calm, grabbed the fire extinguisher, and kept things moving smoothly while pretty much everyone else freaked out.

At the same time, Neji replied to her question. "The system didn't crash, but we just got in loads of messages and e-mails after that. They already total a hundred, and the number keeps climbing! Everyone wants to know if you're all right."

Just then, the door to the museum, which sat between the studio for the company's American channel and that for their British one, opened. Framed in the doorway, Hinata's younger sister Hanabi looked stricken at the sight of her white-faced sibling being led across the studio by her this-close-to-panicking husband. "Hinata? What's going on?"

"Aren't you presenting?" Hinata asked around another pain. "Father will k-kill you if you walked off mid-auction."

"We're on commercial." Hanabi glanced quickly behind her. "We go on again in fifty seconds. I saw a lot of movement over here, and wanted to check on you. Are - are you okay?"

"No!" Hinata thought her voice sounded just a little screechy on that one. "I just went into labor on live TV, Hanabi. I am not okay." In fact, she was beginning to wonder if she'd ever be okay again. Because she was pretty sure feeling like she was about to be torn in two was not something the human body was ever designed to handle. She clutched Sasuke's hand a little tighter, leaning more heavily against his strong support as Tenten wheeled the spare chair out of the gallery for her to sit in.

"Hanabi! On in twenty!"

Letting out a curse, Hanabi glanced over her shoulder, then looked at her sister again, obviously torn.

"Go," Hinata told her from between her teeth. "You've just got another hour, and then you can meet us at the hospital. We're already going to have to find a replacement for me: we can't do it for you, too."

"I love you, big sis. S-see you soon." With that, Hanabi turned and hurried back through the museum to her place in front of the cameras, where she smiled brightly and segued back into her show as if she hadn't a care in the world.

"Good girl," Hinata muttered. The sweat along her hairline was beginning to drip down her face, and she felt the bones in her hands creak as she gripped Sasuke's hand tighter through another pain. "Where's - that - ambulance?"

"Coming, it's coming." Neji knelt next to her, looking up at her with eyes as pale as her own, and awkwardly rubbed her shoulder. "You go have that baby, okay? We've got everything handled here. Tenten and I will be there as soon as our shift ends."

Two more hours. Well, less than that, now. Hinata wondered if they were still on commercial, or if the cameras had come back to show an empty presenter's chair. She eyed Naruto, who stood next to Camera 1 with a look of fear frozen on his face. "I'll be fine," she assured him. Though the panting and groans of pain punctuating her sentence probably weren't all that reassuring.

Naruto nodded robotically, his blue eyes still abnormally wide.

Drawing in a deep breath, Hinata turned back to her cousin. "Lee's taking over, then?" She was supposed to hand off to him at the end of her shift, and wondered how he would feel about tacking on an extra two hours to his own four-hour shift. He was still relatively new and hadn't tried pulling any six or eight hour shifts yet - especially unplanned ones.

"Lee's stuck in traffic," Tenten reported, stepping out of the gallery. She darted a nervous look at the presenter's chair, then tugged self-consciously at the hem of her pretty blue sweater. "Neji's going to have to do double duty in the gallery, and I'll take over presenting until he gets here."

The sound of approaching EMTs reached their ears, and Hinata closed her eyes and wished she never had to show her face at work again.

This is a complete, total, and unmitigated disaster.

Sasuke paced the waiting room, listening intently for any sign of what was going on in the nether regions of the maternity ward. He'd wanted to be there, in the labor/delivery suite, but Hinata insisted he shouldn't be, and the doctors and nurses had backed her up.

There was, admittedly, a small part of him which was terrified of being there when his child was born. Sasuke had done enough research and heard enough horror stories to know childbirth was a very loud, very messy, and very painful business. But at the same time, seeing a new life - half of him, half of Hinata - come into the world...

His musings were interruped by Hanabi's arrival. Then, an hour later, Neji and Tenten's. Eventually the crowd of four swelled to encompass other family and friends, most of whom were from the company. Plus, naturally, Sasuke's brother and his wife, not to mention his parents. Then, to Sasuke's surprise, Hyuuga Hiashi hurried into the room, his rumpled clothes and tired eyes attesting to the fact he had come straight from the airport.

Even though there were several other families in the waiting room, the majority of people were there for Hinata. Sasuke continued to pace, dismissing the various conversations floating about the room as nothing more than the babbling of a brook - background noises. He kept his attention riveted onto the doors leading back to the maternity ward, from which occasionally resounded distant shrieks of pain.

Sasuke winced with each one. He didn't know if they came from Hinata, or from some other of the women back there, but each scream was more than enough to make the fine hairs on the back of his neck stand straight up. His hands were clenched so tightly into fists at his sides he could feel his short nails digging into his palms, forming crescent imprints which threatened to draw blood.

A nurse came out, drawing the hungry attention of everyone in the room. With a wide smile, she announced, "Tsuruga family?" Six people happily got up and followed her, leaving everyone else in the room disappointed as they resumed their seats.

Save, of course, for Sasuke, who resumed his pacing. He knew he was going to wear a hole in the faux linoleum under foot if he wasn't careful, but honestly, he was beyond caring. He just wished Hinata had let him stay with her...

Another scream. Sasuke winced and stuffed his hands in his jeans pockets, clenching and unclenching his fists in an effort to relieve the muscle cramps in his fingers. Come on, come on, come on! Honestly, how long does it take to birth a baby, for cryin' out loud?

Upon another nurse's appearance, the same scene as before was replayed. Except this time, the nurse came for the Kurosaki family, and once again everyone there for Hinata had to slump back to their seats in defeat. Now it was just them and one other family waiting for news, on edge and left with nothing to do but wait for the childbirth process to take its course.

"...strange," Tenten was saying as Sasuke passed by where she and Neji sat across from Hanabi and Hiashi. "I've never been on that side of the camera before. But it was interesting. And kind of fun."

"Do you think you possibly have a future as a presenter?" Hiashi inquired with a raised eyebrow.

Sasuke tried to imagine Tenten in front of the camera all the time. Once he grew accustomed to the idea, he thought it wasn't so farfetched. He got along with her pretty well (better than he did with her husband, anyway), and as a director, she already knew enough about how everything needed to work to be a natural.

"Maybe," Sasuke heard Tenten say cautiously. But then the doors opened again, and once more everyone leaped to their feet and zoomed in on the poor nurse, whose eyes widened at the sight of all those people.

"Um," she stuttered. "The, ah, Uchiha-Hyuuga family?"

The vast majority of people let out a huge sigh of relief, and the other four people slumped back into their chairs with impatient expressions.

Everyone crowded into the hall, and the nurse positioned herself in front of the doors leading back to where Hinata and the baby waited. "It's a girl," she said with a wide smile. "Beautiful child. Eight pounds, six ounces, twenty inches long. Has hair just like her mama." She looked to Sasuke and inquired, "Are you the father?"

Sasuke found himself grinning in what he was sure was a stupid way as he nodded. "How are they?"

The nurse smiled. "Your wife is very tired, but happy and asking for you. Your daughter has a very healthy set of lungs, and she's being cleaned up and checked over right now. I'll take you back to the missus, and then the baby will be brought to you shortly." She looked around at all the other hopeful faces in the group. "I'll come back out for the rest of you in a while so you can see them. Three at a time, please. Now, sir, if you'll just come this way."

Sending another uncharacteristic grin in the direction of his and Hinata's friends and family, Sasuke followed the nurse to where his wife awaited him. She reclined against a pile of pillows on a bed, her messy hair pulled back in a bun at the base of her neck, her makeup smeared and looking a little worse for the wear.

But she positively glowed.

As soon as she saw Sasuke, her entire face lit up and she reached out a hand for him. He hurried to her and grasped it between both of his, concerned about the tremble he felt in her fingers until he saw the way her pearly eyes were misting over.

"She's so beautiful, Sasuke," Hinata whispered. "So beautiful." Her eyes drifted past him, and Sasuke turned to see a different nurse coming into the room, cradling a bundle wrapped in a pink blanket.

"Here's your daughter," the woman said with a smile, settling the cooing baby into her mother's arms. She stepped back, smiled at the new parents, then slipped away.

Hinata scooted aside a bit to make room for Sasuke to sit on the bed next to her. Settling in carefully, he wrapped his arm around his wife's shoulders and pulled her to his chest, gazing down upon the pink, plump-cheeked face of his daughter. Her rosebud mouth puckered, and she fussed a little as one incredibly, impossibly tiny fist squirmed free of the blanket and punched the air.

"Little ninja," Sasuke said. His daughter's face blurred for a moment, and he realized there were tears in his eyes. How strange... But the love swelling in his chest, threatening to make his heart explode, made the tears feel acceptable, even if not natural. "Hello, sweetheart." He touched her fist, marveling at her smooth, warm skin.

Her tiny fingers unfurled, bumping against Sasuke's index before curling around it. She had a surprisingly strong grip for one so tiny, so new to the world.

"She is beautiful." Sasuke breathed his agreement into his wife's hair. "She looks like you."

Hinata darted a look at him out of the corner of her eye as she smiled. "I was just sitting here thinking she looks a lot like you." She yawned and winced. "Sorry. I'm so tired."

"Can you stand a visit from all our relatives and friends first?" Sasuke asked. "Everyone's dying to check in on you and see Hoshi." The name slipped off his tongue naturally, and he blinked. While he and Hinata had been discussing both boy and girl names ever since they found out Hinata was expecting, they hadn't agreed on anything.

Another film of tears misted Hinata's eyes as she smiled down at their daughter, nodding once. "Hoshi Mikoto is anxious to meet them as well, I think," she said. They both smiled together, marveling at how natural it felt, having the little girl named after their mothers.

A half-hour later, after all their friends and family had come in to check on the new mother and see the baby, Sasuke wrapped his arms around his precious, priceless sleeping wife and daughter and marveled at how perfect his life really was.

He honestly couldn't ask for anything more.

*~The End~*

Author's Note: One day fairly recently at the dinner table, my mother started musing aloud. There's a bit of a baby boom on our favorite jewelry television channel, and knowing how much she adores SasuHina, combined with her comment, "I wonder what would happen if she went into labor on live TV?" made this plot bunny come to life in my head. And what could I do but write it, and gift it to her for Valentine's Day? I hope you enjoyed this piece, thanks for reading, and I hope all have a great Valentine's Day!

Author's Note 2: The company/jewelry channel Hinata works for in this fic is based on a real company. The Genuine Gemstone Company is a family-owned business based in England who runs four channels (Gems TV in the UK, Rocks TV in America, The Lounge online, and Gem Collector, a loose gemstone network, also online). Their mission is to go directly to the mines, helping support the local economy all over the globe, then setting the genuine gemstones into solid gold, silver, and platinum (no "brass and glass" to be found here!) and selling them in a falling-price auction style at extremely affordable prices. (Seriously. I've seen prices from $1 to upwards $30,000 - something for every budget! And there really are under- $20, $30, $50, and $100 [or pound, depending on where you are] hours scattered all through the day.) It's a fun channel to watch simply because everyone loves their jobs and are happy to be there, unlike a lot of television shopping networks. (And the bit about Tanzanite being difficult to find and ridiculously high priced in the industry? That's actually real, not a work of fiction.) Plus it's fascinating to learn all about these gemstones and the places from which they came. /end plug/ Anyway, there's bit of a baby boom going on across the channels of the company right now, and that, plus my mother's comment, plus her love of SasuHina, inspired this fic. It's a lot different from what I usually write, but I hope you all enjoyed it anyway! Thanks for reading!