because screw your feels

disclaimer: i don't own the copyrighted material within

When Tadashi finally tracks down bot fight ringleader Kaori Narita, she says that Yama looked down at Hiro, babyfaced five foot tall little bastard who dared swindle him, and s-m-i-l-e-d. That, and Hiro cried out for his niisan when Yama's goons carted him down to the places where even Fujitas are wary to tread.

All Tadashi knows is that on The Night Where Everything Went Wrong, Hiro sneaked out to go bot fighting. Tadashi had been with Aunt Cass, laughing at her customers and thinking nothing of Hiro's flyaway steps, of him walking out the door down to an alley where Kaori saw Yama smile. When he didn't come home by midnight Tadashi ran out the door to his moped and left his phone in his bedroom; Hiro called but the voicemail box was full, and what did Tadashi miss?

Kaori's the only one that talks; the other fighters' lips press together into tiny white lines, like the clipped traffic lines leading down to the bay. It's Wasabi's car but Gogo drives, urgency shuddering up all of their veins to fill their minds with nausea because Hiro's missing, Tadashi's kid brother is missing and a gang lord smiled before Hiro disappeared.

Honey tilts Tadashi's chin up when his heavy eyes drag his spine to the floor. Honey keeps his chin raised, and Fred pulls Tadashi's shoulders back in preparation for a fight, a showdown, a march to the sea where missing peoples' shoes often wash up. Wasabi can see for a thousand details and Hiro's shoes are not in the bay, nor his hoodie

and Tadashi inhales relief and sobs out horror, because where is Hiro? He calls and calls, to the sea and the sky and Hiro's number, and no one responds.

The police don't say much either, only post flyers and an ad on daytime television. Hiro's a bot fighter and a juvenile delinquent and maybe he just ran away, maybe Yama offered him what the Hamads couldn't

It's the first time that Tadashi sees Aunt Cass's knuckles split against a hook nose, dragging skin against the officer's mustache to land her in jail. She shrugs like Gogo shrugging about her own record, or Honey about Fred's ideas, or Tadashi's old TA Abigail shrugging about Hiro's future. It'll all be alright, now go and bring the baby home before dinner, and feed Mochi why don't you?

They comb the streets, they ask everyone at SFIT for news, and Professor Callaghan listens to Tadashi weep. One day turns to two, then to one week and then to two weeks, and Hiro's shoes aren't in the bay, his hoodie isn't at the precinct, and Yama s-m-i-l-e-d.

Tadashi doesn't eat, he can't when his baby brother could be dead in a gutter that even Kaori won't approach. His parents trusted him with Hiro's safety and Tadashi remembers Hiro's flyaway steps, his laughter and his eyes open with mischief, and why hadn't he stopped him?

Why would Hiro go to the fight in the first place, when he could be home with Aunt Cass and Mochi and Tadashi?

Gogo pinches reason into Tadashi's waist, that she's seen many delinquents in her rough-tumble neighborhood and it's nothing personal. But Wasabi's hands on Tadashi's elbows brings back the shame, because Tadashi's asked Wasabi to get his officer mother to let Hiro off easy, to try and salvage his record.

Enabler, enabler, Tadashi screams Hiro's name all over San Fransokyo and only gets bewildered stares in return. Hiro's voicemail fills up just like Tadashi's and where is he, where is he?

He corners Kaori again near campus, and finds out that not only do the Fujitas avoid the heart of Yama's underworld, but there's more of them than the police propaganda posters. Two of them are fellow SFIT students, Tadashi remembers asking Nene Wakahisa and Kanon Akiyama about kinesthetics for Baymax's data, and

Baymax

Baymax isn't quite ready yet but it will have to do. Tadashi's friends crowd around as Tadashi gives Baymax Hiro's old hairbrush to scan, and hold him upright when Baymax can't find him. He's not in San Fransokyo proper, but that means he's not dead in a gutter, and Tadashi begs Kaori, Nene, Kanon and all the other shifting women to please

please find his otouto, flyaway baby brother

They scatter across the bay, and Tadashi makes himself sick with dayterrors. Hiro in the bay, deep down so Wasabi can't spot his shoes on the shoes. Hiro in the southern valley, chained up in Yama's summer home to be his little toy

"Woman up," GogoHoneyFredWasabiAuntCassKaori hiss and keep Tadashi's hat from falling into the vomit bucket, "and find Hiro."

It's his job, it's his only job and Tadashi will be damned if he does not bring Hiro home.

So syncs all his friends to radio, and convinces Professor Callaghan to fly him and Baymax to a floating turbine. Abigail's missing just like Hiro and that makes Tadashi's mentor extra giving, and oh god Abigail used to be a bot fighter, is Yama taking all the mischief eyed flyaways?

Baymax can't find neither can anyone else, and Yama s-m-i-l-e-d, WHY?!

Yama lives deep in San Fransokyo in a palace, and Tadashi needs more than his moped to break in. So he breaks out the blueprints, and for every minute Hiro is missing, he creates five minutes of work. For himself, and his friends when they demand to help, and even Kaori, Nene and Kanon when they skate around the issue of getting them in unannounced. Fred's enthusiastic because now they're going to be superheroes and save Hiro old-fashioned like

Hiro is missing and Tadashi has a katana and Yama smiled.

It's not the most elegant of break-ins, but it's functional. There's something thrilling about racing through the underbelly of his city to slice open Yama's little circle, and is this what drove Hiro away from home? The rush of adrenaline, the smug superiority when Yama's boy army falls to Tadashi's inventions? Fred burns and Honey explodes and Gogo spirals and Wasabi slices and three Fujitas circle round and round, and Tadashi calls out for Hiro in Yama's halls.

Hiro doesn't answer, but Yama does.

Tadashi tries to stay calm, a marionette for his friends to adjust pull tilt straighten push during the questions, but Yama keeps his lip closed like clipped traffic lines to the sea. Then he smiles and raises an obscene gesture, just like when he sent Hiro away, and Tadashi cuts that filthy hand clean off.

Yama doesn't smile after that, no one does, but he talks.

He talks of this nice little lake district up north, he talks of henchmen who like to rough up babyfaced five foot tall little bastards who dare to swindle Yama.

He talks of cement, and a single phone call home.

With his remaining hand Yama gives Tadashi his brother's phone, and s-m-i-l-e-s.

Before Tadashi can cut the smile from his face he goes outside to scroll through Hiro's last sent calls. Hiro's voice blase and "I'll be fine" to Aunt Cass about seeing a late movie, Hiro's voice annoyed and "How did you get this number" at 5 am to a telemarketer and

Hiro's voice small and terrified and cracking and "Tadashi please!" on The Night Where Everything Went Wrong.

"Tadashi please pick up! Please, please pick up, I'm in s-so much trouble! I made this guy mad—I was bot fighting, I'm so so sorry—and they t-told me I have one call before they—oh god no, please! They're putting me in a cement tub, I think they're g-gonna throw me in the lake! Tadashi please! Please pick up, call 911 and come here and help me please! Niisan tasukete, please! I w-wanna go h-home! I'm so sorry, so s-sorry!

Oh god—no! N-No! Tadashi they're—NIISAN PLEASE HELP ME!"

A splash, a heavy splash and men laughing in the background and no shoes in the bay, not when they're cemented at the bottom of a lake. The call ends and all Tadashi can hear is his own breaths drag in drag out above his friends' horror and Yama's s-m-i-l-i-n-g.

Tadashi drops Hiro's phone from nerveless fingers and it bounces into a koi pond. Honey screams and Fred roars and Kaori's digging a fine blade into Yama's neck and no hoodie at the precint, not when it's bogged down miles away.

How long does it take for a child to drown in terror?

How long does it take for a child to decompose in secret?

Tadashi doesn't scream as pain shoots down his left arm, to his jaw, along all the shattered memories of 14 years ended in a criminal's backyard. No, he just collapses backwards into Baymax's arms, blinks up to hear Baymax announcing that Tadashi is in cardiac arrest and may someone please aid Baymax in delivering care?

His friends tilt him and adjust him and straighten him and one two three shudder shocks

Hiro's flyaway hair, from toddler to murder victim, tiny-tiny fingers curled around Tadashi's thumb and heart

four five six

always Tadashi and Hiro, Tadashi is his otouto's niisan, his baby brother's big brother, just as their parents intended, and will Aunt Cass mind terribly if none of them come home?

seven eight nine

all these hands and all these voices begging and all he can do is scream for Hiro, chase a flyaway into the dark away from a madman's s-m-i-l-e

ten—

aus where hiro dies and tadashi lives (or starts out alive?) give me strength