AN- The last chapter! Wow, this feels like a momentous occasion; it's the last chapter of the first multi-chapter story I've finished on this site! Though this story was just written for a bit of fun and to parody something parodied many times before- Mary Sue and Gary Stu- it was actually a ton of fun to write, and I hope everyone had just as much fun reading!

Thanks to everyone who's supported me on this story or any of 'em: I appreciate it a LOT (seriously, without you people, I wouldn't have nearly as much fun writing as I do)! And now, without further ado, the epilogue! Hope you enjoy! :D

(also, sorry about this being a bit late. I got nervous about posting it, for numerous reasons. One of them being I realized this isn't really behind the scenes, more like commentary. I'm sorry for the bit of false advertising, and I hope that doesn't put too many people off. :P)

The interview was about to start. Peach squirmed in her chair nervously. She was perfectly fine directing a show, but starring? That was a whole 'nother can of worms. Especially since this was behind the scenes stuff for the DVD release of her documentary (somehow, Master Hand agreed to let them release it on DVD. Maybe he thought it'd make a good cult classic or something).

The camera facing her slowly beeped to life, and the frame sitting across from her (just behind the camera) cleared his throat.

"So, Miss Peach," he started, "why did you decide to direct a documentary on Mary Sue and Gary Stu?"

"Well," Peach started, "first off, you can just call me Peach! None of that 'miss' stuff; makes me feel old!" The princess laughed slightly forcefully, her nerves showing plain as day, and the interview frame raised his eyebrows.

"…Right," he deadpanned, "Now. Back to the question."

Peach swallowed nervously. "Of course. Well, I actually decided to make a documentary on them because I was curious about them. They're just so mysterious! No one I talked to really knew much about the two, besides the fact no one could defeat them in a tournament if ever they were to join. So I went to the library, and found the book that Yoshi read to everyone watching, and was so interested in the pair I thought others might be; thus, the idea of a documentary to spread the knowledge I acquired came into being!"

"I see," the interviewer nodded, seemingly disinterested in what Peach was saying, "now, what do you have to say to all the people involved in making the documentary?"

Peach smiled, "That's easy! For everyone that did well, thank you! For everyone that didn't..." Her eyes darkened, though her smile stayed put, "Make sure to watch your backs!"

"What was it like being a narrator, and being able to speak for the first time?"

Yoshi (still wearing his bathrobe and wig) stared at the interview frame, before clearing his throat to say the most eloquent sentence in the history of mankind.

"Yoshi yoshi, yoshi yo-" Yoshi stopped midsentence, realizing the pill that had given him his silky British voice had finally worn off. Before he could even react, some random female wire frame came from the wings and tossed a translator pill at his face. Yoshi caught it, swallowed it quickly (but not too quickly, as he learned the hard way the last time around), and opened his mouth yet again to speak the most eloquent sentence in the history of mankind...

"Why did you feel the need to interrupt Yoshi reading the story about Mary Sue?"

Pichu gave her wire frame interviewer a look that obviously meant 'duh'. "Because that book was full of lies!"

"And the truth was your story about Mary Sue being an alien?"

"Of course!" Pichu was getting animated in her interview, leaning forward in her chair and grinning eagerly, "You see, it was a long and arduous process to acquire the information I did. The research I performed coupled with my own experience leaves me knowing, beyond a shadow of a doubt, exactly what Mary Sue truly is!"

Interviewer Wire Frame glanced at his notes. "The alien offspring of Demise who came down to Earth to create a chicken farm?"

"Nah," Pichu smirked, "only Ike believes that bit about the chicken farming."

"But of course she is a chicken farmer!" Ike declared, straightening the tie he wore (this was a formal event for him- he had to dress accordingly). "You see, my parents always told me stories of Mary Sue and her chicken farm. Every day, she worked diligently to cultivate and grow the juiciest, plumpest chicken specimens she could! Now that I know she was an alien, I know exactly why they were the best chicken around- the chickens were alien too! This discovery has made gigantic leaps and bounds in the chicken consumption industry!"

The wire frame's eye twitched. She didn't know how much more of this she could take.

"What do you mean I died?!" Link shot out of his seat, causing his head to go out of the camera's view. All it saw was his hands waving around wildly. "I'm as alive as you are! Look, flesh and blood! Do I look dead to you!?"

Marth furrowed his brow, eyeing the interviewer strangely. "Who's 'Mary Sue'? And you're saying I fought Link to the death over her hand in marriage?"

The interviewer nodded.

"…Who comes up with this stuff?"

Toon Link's bottom lip quivered. "Pichu almost died! I was so scared! Please, Mr. Interviewer, let me go check on her health yet again!"

The frame shook his head, "Not yet, she's perfectly-"

"Bye!" Toon Link shot out of his seat and out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"-fine."

"-And that is why I know that Mary Sue is an evil alien from outer space," Pichu smiled, leaning back from her long spiel.

The interviewer was leaning forward still, having been completely enraptured with the Pokémon's story (even though he knew it was completely and utterly false).

The door to the room whipped open, whacking into the wall with a loud thwack and scaring the frame half to death.

"Pichu! Are you alright?!" Toon Link asked frantically, looking Pichu over for any life-threatening injuries.

"Hey!" She tried pushing him away, but to no avail. "Get away- stop- you st- don't touch me- GET OFF!"

Toon Link screamed (quite a high-pitched scream, mind you) at Pichu's loud outburst, stumbling backwards and falling onto the interviewer's lap.

Pichu smiled innocently, "Next question, please!"

"And you say she has a brother, Gary Stu?" Marth questioned, looking to all the world completely and utterly befuddled. "What does that have to do-"

The door opened, and a steaming Link stormed to Marth's side, yanking the prince out of his seat.

"SEE?! HE'S ALIVE TOO! WE'RE NOT DEAD! I'M NOT DEAD! Let's go, Marth, these people are creeps!"

And the Hylian dragged the prince out of the room, ignoring the confused, panicky yells emanating from his friend.

The interviewer sat there for a second, shocked into silence, until Link stormed back in and stared right into the camera lens.

"And by the way, MARY SUE IS THE OFFSPRING OF DEMISE, SHE IS NOT SOME PRETTY WOMAN!"

"So, how have you been dealing with your sudden onset of blindness?"

Double eye-patch frame sighed softly, his lips pulled down in a frown. "Well, it's been a struggle. You see, I worked for a publishing company before my-" he paused, thinking of how to most politely word what he was thinking, "-my accident, and I was a proofreader there. Now, I can't read. I'm blind." A stray tear leaked out from his right eye-patch. "I'll have to learn Braille, which will take quite some time, so that'll be at least three months off of work. I'll have to pick up a few extra shifts at the factory where I have a part-time job, too..."

The female wire frame interviewing her fellow suddenly found it very hard to see her subject through her own plump tears.

"Then, of course, there's the impact it'll have on my family." The frame's bottom lip started quivering gently, "You see, I have two children, both little male wire frames. One of them is missing both of his legs, however," he sniffled, "and the other is missing his head. It's been a real struggle for us."

Yep. She couldn't see anything through her tears- nothing at all.

"I don't know how they'll hold up. You see, just last year their mother died. Not only has it been hard on us," he bit his lip to hold back the sobs, "but it's been hard on her too. Adjusting to being dead, well, she's just really having a hard time of it."

The female wire frame couldn't hold back any longer. She lunged out of her seat and clutched onto double eye-patch frame, sobs wracking her thin frame. "I-I'm s-so s-s-sorry for y-your l-loss!"

"Me too," he patted her back gently, hot tears leaking from his eye-patches, "me too."

"The chicken is actually quite an interesting bird, if you think about it," Ike said, whipping out a pair of reading glasses and perching them on the tip of his nose. "For instance, the chicken goes extremely well with various condiments when cooked. It is a subspecies of the red junglefowl, and is obviously domesticated. It's scientific name is gallus gallus domesticus, and it is…"

The interviewer frame was whacking her clipboard off her face. I wanna be unconscious. I wanna be unconscious. I wanna be unconscious…

"So, what exactly happened to Little Mac?" The frame questioned, leaning forward in his seat slightly.

Peach froze, sweat dripping down her face. "…Would you believe me if I told you I sent him to McDonalds?"

The tape stopped rolling, and Master Hand found he couldn't tear his gaze from the screen. The wire frame who pieced together the footage for the "Behind the Scenes" part of the DVD (which had numerous features besides the interviews) looked to the hand expectantly.

"…That was all of the best footage?" His deep voice questioned incredulously.

"Yep," she nodded, "that was everything I could salvage from the interviews that wouldn't either bore viewers half to death or scar them for life."

Master Hand paused. "I'd hate to see the stuff that didn't make it on. Also, what happened to make you include almost no Yoshi segments?"

"The translator pill made him start speaking Swahili. No one knew what he was saying, and we couldn't find the Swahili translator frame- I heard he's vacationing in Morocco. Not to mention the fact we ran out of translator pills."

"Ah, I see. And why was Link so sensitive about people thinking he was dead?"

"He found Majora's Mask theories a few weeks back. He hasn't been the same since."

"Oooh. Someone really needs to take those things off the internet."

Then there was silence. As the quiet reigned, the frame finally got up the courage to ask something.

"Master Hand?"

"Yes?"

She took a breath, "What's the real story of Mary Sue and Gary Stu?"

The hand turned to look at her, and the frame would later swear that, if Master Hand had a face, he'd be indifferent.

"Oh, them? I made them up for publicity. They were never real."

"WHAT?!"

Both the frame and Master Hand spun around to see a hoard of people in the doorway of the right hand's office: Link, Marth, Toon Link, Ike, Pichu, double eye-patch frame, Yoshi, and most terrifyingly, Peach.

The princess practically had steam leaking out of her ears as she stormed forward, stopping inches from the hand. "YOU MADE THEM UP?!"

"…Would you believe me if I told you that you heard wrong?"

Pichu stepped forward, frying pan in hand. "GET HIM!"

Master Hand felt sweat pooling in his glove. Please say I get a lovely eulogy.

AN- Any info Ike started spewing about chicken was found on the internet (except for the whole condiment thing, heh); if it's incorrect, my apologies.

Thanks for reading, it's much appreciated, and reviews/constructive criticism are ALWAYS welcomed! :D