Hi! I am so sorry this took me so long to post this chapter. I seem to have left alot of stories untouched. I am back hopefully to catch up on some things. Just alot going on in RL and things like that took me away from writing. Here's chapter three finally ! :)

Sam tears were still in his eyes as he looks up at his brother, hearing the question he went silent. Dean got the medical kit and walks over seeing the silence and pain in Sam's eyes and face. "Sam.." Sam looks at Dean he knew he wanted to know and nods softly "Yeah.." Dean enhales some as he took a look at Sam's arms he had to clean it up then checked to see how deep the cut was then he gotten the needle and thread and started to sew his arm. Sam winces some as Dean was fixing his arm.

The entire process was happening in silence. The tension to the quiet room was think you could almost feel like every energy was being sucked out of the area. Dean finally broke the silence when he spoke. "Alright, Im all done with your arm..Sam..I need to know how long have you been doing this?" Sam looks down for a moment before looking at Dean's green eyes "Since I was sixteen I guess..dad never knew about it.." Dean pales some hearing this confession "What? how did you even hide the cuts?" Sam had cleared his throat while wiping the tears from his eyes "Pants and shirts sometimes I would make sure I just did it higher when noone could see it."

Sam went quiet for a moment thinking back to the times he did it then spoke up "I would do it when I was alone and I blame it in the hunting jobs if it was seen. I don't know why I do it Dean maybe, It just.." Dean looks at his brother then jumps in "realeses the pain you were feeling at the time.." Sam nods some while taking a deep breath.

Dean felt sick to his stomach how did he not know his brother was hurting like this "And dad never knew about it?" Sam shook his head "No, it went on for a couple of years until..I went to Standford..then I met Jessica I just didn't do it anymore.." Dean tried to hold his temper in check and spoke

"Yeah, so you stopped right?" Sam had nodded some before speaking "Yeah, but I had a couple of relapse I had cut to deep where I was bleeding to much Jessica found me. I was later taken to the hospital where they placed me in observation, and I was diagnosed with depression."

Dean gets up and started to pace a bit looking over at Sam then went to get some whiskey pours it in two glasses handing Sam one then spoke "Sammy what the hell...you didn't think to call me when you were in trouble?" Sam took a drink as he looks up at Dean "No didn't how could I tell you why I was in the hospital. It wasn't easy talking about it to school counselor, It's never easy talking about it with my brither."

Dean nods some as he sat in front of Sam "Yeah, I get it, it's never easy to go through this. But I wish I had known you were in this much pain." Sam felt the warm tears coming down his cheeks "There was nothing you could have done. It was my problem. After what happened I did stop." Dean had nodded some "Alright thats good but, when did you start back up." Sam went silence for a moment "A few days after Jessica died" Sam admitted to Dean. Dean took a moment to get his head wrapped around this.

"After Jessica died? Sam why I'm sorry Im trying to understand here why you would do this to yourself. Is it punishment for what happened? Jessica's death wasn't your fault. This has to stop Sam you have to stop doing this. You could hit an artery and really bleed out." Dean was worried for Sam and panicky inside. Sam looks at Dean with sad eyes "I don't know if I can Dean." Dean sighs some looking at Sam "You can and I will help you but you have to be willing to try and want to do this?"

Sam looks at Dean for a moment and nods some "I do, I hate doing this I just want to be normal." Dean takes a deep breath "I know you do. Right now lets try and get some sleep okay in the morning we can talk more on this and how to help you." Sam nods as he gotten up then lead to the bed. Sam gotten under the covers as Dean tucks him in like he did when his brother was little then Sam rolls onto his side. Dean spent the rest of the night sitting in the chair drinking whiskey and keeping an eye on Sam. He had to do something to help him.