A/N 4/12/19: Hi everyone! It's been a while since I did anything with this story, but it's still very dear to my heart. I recently re-read through all the reviews (and thank you so, SO much to anybody who left a review!) and remembered why it's so close to my heart - because I WAS Annie in this story. She wasn't my self-insert, but throughout writing the story I became her, I went inside her head and experienced the life she was living. I mainly went through and edited for consistency and awkward phrasing, but I also updated whole chapters (especially later chapters) and added certain things to make scenes more meaningful (hopefully) than before. Happy reading, and thank you! :D

Chapter One: No Sense of Belonging

"So you're really leaving to go run a farm?"

I nodded proudly, stuffing some socks into the corner of my suitcase. "I've always wanted to. You of all people should know that."

Johnny sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Then he shook his head. "It's because it's me of all people that I'm saying you're crazy."

"Don't be like that. There's nothing for me here, anyway. I don't fit in."

"And you think you're gonna fit in with a bunch of farmers and country folk?"

I bit my lip. "...I'll be fine."

I couldn't show hesitation, not now. I'd already run through all the pros and cons and decided going was my best course of action. The papers were already signed, anyway, so it would take a lot of guts and apologies to back out now.

"Whatever you say, Annie. Don't come crying to me when you realize what it's like out there and you can't do it."

I clenched my fists at my side, muttering under my breath, "That's another reason I'm doing this - to get away from you."

His eyes widened for a brief second. "Oh, really? I won't stand in your way then. By all means, take your leave, Princess."

He didn't wait for my reply, simply turning around and walking out the front door to my apartment. I heaved a sigh once he left, then resumed packing.

I didn't need an unsupportive idiot like him hanging around me, anyway. Besides, we both knew he would be the one crawling back to me once he realized what he was missing.

After shoving the rest of my clothes inside the suitcase, I sat on it to pack down the bulkiness and zipped it up. A wide smile spread across my face. Step one - packing - was all done. Now all that was left to do was leave.

...

It had already been a week since I moved here.

I got used to the sweat and heat, and I rather appreciated the noise of the birds chirping over the subway. The townspeople seemed to like me well enough, but I kept a safe distance anyway. They were easygoing and cheerful, and I thought myself to be the same, but for some reason, it just didn't feel right to spend so much time talking to them.

People here were almost too nice, so much that I nearly took off after meeting Veronica. Life just... wasn't like that in the city.

But for the most part, everyone was friendly and accepting (even the ditzier ones like my fellow farmers down the hill, Fritz and Giorgio), though it did feel like they all had their own little cliques already.

...And I felt like I didn't belong.

Regardless, I wasn't one to whine and cry about things I couldn't change. The more you complain, the less people are willing to help you. So I didn't cry or complain even when, on the first day, I tripped and fell down the entire staircase in the middle of town. Luckily nobody saw or heard anything, so it was easy enough to play it off.

I didn't cry as I realized my cow was becoming my best friend. In a way, Hanako reminded me of Johnny - like a rock to stand on when I needed support. Except Hanako didn't judge me for wanting to move out to the country.

I lived on a farm for a very short time when I was young – my parents were having marital problems so my father took me to his brother's place during the summer I turned eight. I'd made friends with the animals and had actually grown pretty accustomed to helping out with milking and raking and pulling up weeds and the like.

Living on a farm here was pretty much the same feeling, except I had to stay by myself and do all the work alone.

Anyway, for quite some time I'd been looking for an opportunity to get out of the city. I didn't really have any family left there for me, so there were just too many memories I wanted to leave behind. Sometime last month, I was walking around the square and saw the flyer for Oak Tree. I was with Johnny and he tried his hardest to talk me out of it but I ignored him and ran home immediately to prepare myself.

After our little tiff, he didn't speak to me for three long weeks, until the night everything was settled and I started packing, and then we just ended up arguing again. He didn't see me off when I boarded the train. I didn't want him to, anyway.

"Good girl," I cooed, patting Hanako all over her head. She leaned into my hand when I got closer to her ear, obviously enjoying the attention.

I usually did this while I milked her, because even though old lady Eda trained her, she didn't seem to like the cold metal thing touching her udders very much. The satisfaction of being petted probably offset the discomfort. It was harder for me to maneuver like this, but as long as I got my milk and she was comfortable, it was fine.

I patted her head once more before dragging the bucket of milk out of the barn and into the house. I'd been diluting and cleaning it myself with methods I remembered from all those years ago, but the price I sold it for and the lack of complaints probably meant I was doing it right - or at least decently.

After all my morning chores were completed, it was almost nine already. I was starting to smell like a real farmer, but a farmer couldn't do her job without seeds, so I decided to go to Mr. Otmar's shop while I was still playing the part.

My sore feet brought me down the winding path, the sweet smells of summer wafting into my nostrils. I took a deep breath to savor it.

I knew this would be the case, and I reveled in it every day, but country air had already proven itself to be a million times cleaner than city air. No pollution. All you could smell was nature. And because I walked around all the time in the city anyway, there wasn't really any adjustment period for me in terms of exercise.

I definitely needed some better shoes, though. It turned out walking on concrete was very different from walking on farmland and bare grass.

As I approached the bottom of the hill, to my right was the rival farm (or farms, considering one person ran each one). I thought about stopping by while I was still in a good mood to say hello, but my stomach growled and diminished all hopes of doing that.

I was doing my best to cook for myself, but there was a limit to how many cucumber sandwiches I could eat every day. They were starting to trigger my gag reflex just because I was so sick of them.

If I remembered correctly, there was a restaurant in town nearby. Admittedly, I actually hadn't been inside any buildings besides the general shop and the guild office. The latter was only because Veronica had practically led me by the hand there when I moved in. I met her daughter and the cross-dressing doctor, and come to think of it, there were only a handful of people I didn't remember meeting yet.

I'd seen them around town but never introduced myself to the innkeeper, the chef, the contractors, and a few others. If that went on I'd probably be considered rude so I made a mental note to stop by those places after I stocked up my seeds.

I reached the general store after some more mental debate and pushed the door in. Mr. Otmar looked up from the counter, invested in his fishing magazine just moments ago, but he didn't look as happy to see me as I was to see him.

"Oh, who are you?"

Now, see, any other person in my situation would've responded probably a little nastily, but I knew Mr. Otmar was getting a few pre-Alzheimer's symptoms – and besides, he really was a sweet old man when he remembered me.

I just smiled. "I'm Annie, the new farmer? I just moved in last week."

Suddenly his face rolled up into a smile and I could see he really did remember. "Oh! Annie!"

I nodded. It wasn't that I was a very patient person by default, but I had a soft spot for seniors, I guess, because I didn't have any grandparents growing up. I always wanted to know what that was like.

"I just need to stock up on some seeds again," I told him. I reached into my pocket and yanked out my wallet, not really knowing why I didn't count my money before coming here.

There was only just over six hundred gold so I couldn't go all out. "Could I get three bags of tomatoes?" Tomatoes regrew quickly, meaning more profit to equal more seeds, rinse and repeat.

Otmar nodded and left his post for a moment to grab a few bags for me. When he returned, he placed the seeds in front of me and started the math on his cash register. "That's… three tomato bags… one-fifty each… uh, who are you again – oh! Annie!" He turned to me. "You get a discount today!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"Because you're my best customer this week!"

I think I stifled a laugh then. Did that mean I was buying more than anybody else? That wasn't very fair – I'd just moved in, so of course I needed to buy more stuff than other people.

I bit my lip. I didn't want to be selfish, but I remembered that I was hungry and only had a little bit of money left, and I was going to be stopping at the restaurant soon, anyway…

"Okay, so how much of a discount is it?"

He typed in some stuff on the register again, like he hadn't figured it out already, and smiled. "I only need one-fifty from you today."

That number made me happy, but I also felt scummy, like I was ripping him off. Still… that meant I could probably get a better dish, and while I wasn't exactly a glutton, food was always good.

"All right," I conceded, grabbing out the right amount of coins, "here you go. Thank you!"

He waved it off and just kept smiling that old man smile. He opened the register and deposited the coins before putting the seed bags inside another bag and handing it to me. "Come again, Andrea."

"It's Annie," I corrected, though at least he got the first syllable right. I took the bag and bowed my head as I walked out the door.

Every day I spent in Oak Tree was a mini adventure, really. I never knew what was going to happen.

In any case, my stomach growled again, so I figured I should gung ho it to the restaurant if I wanted anything in my bloodstream before passing out.

The staircase was a bit tricky, only because I was spacy and a bit lightheaded from lack of food, but I made it to the door of what I thought was the restaurant in no time.

I knew Mr. Otmar enough to just barge through the door, but the restaurant wasn't left open and I didn't know who worked there or anything, so I knocked a few times to be on the safe side. It took a while, but I heard footsteps coming towards me, and I death gripped the plastic bag of seeds out of anxiety.

"I'm sorry, but I really don't want any newspa – "

I didn't know what to say, if I should've said anything at all, so I just stood there wide-eyed as the chef stared me down, realizing he was probably talking to the wrong person. I wasn't selling any newspapers.

"Sorry," he said, stepping away and running a hand through his hair. I averted my eyes awkwardly, embarrassed to be thinking of how good-looking he was. I'd seen him from afar before, but never this close.

"Usually, everyone just comes up and pushes the door in. I guess now that it's summer, though, I should leave the door open, right? It's still pretty early in the morning, so the bugs shouldn't be too bad…"

He was talking to himself for a few more moments and I didn't really catch everything that he said. I was almost regretting my decision to come there when he smacked himself on the forehead.

"I'm really sorry. Here, come in."

He stepped back and opened the door all the way, motioning with his arm for me to go inside. I did, and the décor of the place surprised me. By the way he looked, I expected the interior to be more modern, but the yellow walls and tile floor just said traditional. It looked very homey and comfortable, and I already felt better being inside than I was outside, even if the chef was a little weird…

"Jeez, sorry it's so messy," he said quickly, disappearing behind the counter to wipe up something or other. I didn't even realize what he was talking about with the 'messy' part, but I brushed it off. He seemed like some sort of a health nut, so it wouldn't surprise me if he was a germaphobe too.

There wasn't anybody else inside, and the bar area didn't look dirty, so I seated myself on a stool and admired the design a little more.

Just like everybody else I hadn't formally met yet, I'd seen the chef (I still didn't know his name) around town when I went to the shop or the trade depot to sell things. We'd exchange pleasantries and smile at each other sometimes, but I never talked to him for more than thirty seconds at a time. This was a whole new thing, and it taught me that first impressions were almost never right.

"Are you the only worker here?" I asked. At least I hoped he could hear me, because I couldn't see what he was doing behind the counter.

He popped his head up, his light brown hair sticking up in all different directions. "Yep. I actually kinda own it."

He didn't seem angered, but the way he said it sounded like he thought I was trying to belittle him. I wasn't. I honestly had no idea he worked here, let alone owned it, because I was pretty ignorant for the most part…

Did I need to apologize? "Oh, sor – "

"If you stick around for another half hour or so, you can meet Lillie. She keeps saying how much she wants to meet you."

My first thoughts about this guy were definitely wrong. It was like he had ADD or something and couldn't sit still. Was this just because he was working? But there was nobody in the restaurant besides me, and he hadn't even offered me a drink or anything yet, and now he was going on about some girl – was that his girlfriend? How could he possibly have a girlfriend? He was attractive, sure, but with a personality like that, it must've been hard getting any girl to like him.

Maybe I was just being mean, though. I should've given him the benefit of the doubt and say that he was just overacting and being weird because the summer heat was sending him into delirium. Yeah, that was it. It was pretty hot outside, after all.

"Who's Lillie?" I asked. If I stayed silent for too long he might've gotten weirded out by me, and I didn't want the weirdo to think the same thoughts about me.

"She's the town's weathergirl."

I felt my eyes nearly bulge out. "This town has a weathergirl? With only, like, twenty people?"

He laughed, and that was the first time his eyes looked full of mirth. He set down whatever he was holding and met my gaze.

He was definitely starting to look less weird and more attractive again.

"There's more than twenty people living here, y'know," he mocked. His tone seemed to imply he was loosening up, losing the sort of stingy, quirky nature he exuded just moments before.

"You just haven't met everybody yet," he continued, "and besides, there's a bunch of people you'll see in here a lot but they normally just stay home and keep to themselves all day. I honestly don't know many of them by name, but everyone here is friendly and accepting."

I chuckled, then put a hand to my mouth to stifle it.

"What?" he asked, an eyebrow raised.

I shook my head and smiled. "No, it's nothing. It's just that I thought those same exact words about the people here – they're friendly and accepting."

I started laughing again, not really knowing why I found it so funny, and he kept his eyebrow raised but smiled amusingly with me anyway. He definitely wasn't a bad guy, so I could feel myself loosening up as well. Maybe I could have another friend here besides Hanako – while I liked Mr. Otmar plenty, half the time he didn't even remember my name, so…

After I finally calmed down, I rubbed at my eyes to try and wipe the tears away. I almost always cried a little when I laughed.

"Anyway, sorry I didn't really introduce myself," I said. "You probably thought I was a salesperson or something, the way I knocked on the door."

He chuckled and waved a hand. "No, no, that's fine. I've just been having some trouble with those people lately. Nobody ever knocks on the door unless they're unfamiliar with the place, so I just put two and two together and must've gotten three instead of four."

I laughed a bit awkwardly. He had an odd sense of humor. "So you really get salespeople here?"

He nodded. "You'd be surprised." He pulled out what looked like another stool from beneath the sink and sat down on it, facing me head on now. "It's mainly concerning Lillie, though."

My eyebrow raised involuntarily. "The weathergirl?"

"Yeah," he said simply.

I shook my head. "She's gotta be more than that."

He stared blankly, not even at me really.

"Isn't she your girlfriend?" I tried. "The way your eyes have been lighting up, there's something else there."

I laughed as his face paled. "Th-that's not – "

"And I bet she's got you pretty whipped."

He shot me a confused glance, only making me laugh more. "How… how did you…?"

I nodded and smiled, calming down. "I left behind a... boyfriend, I guess, in the city. His name's Johnny." It wasn't really untrue. We just didn't flaunt it so much.

He cleared his throat, adjusting to the new topic just as quickly as I had. "You guess? Is it serious?"

"Um…" I hesitated. "I'm actually not sure." I lifted a hand to rub the back of my neck. "Come to think of it, I don't really know if we're still even together anymore since, y'know, I moved here and all. He was kind of against it from the start anyway. We've been together since we were kids and it's not unusual to go a few months without talking to each other because we'll pick right back up where we left off anyway, but…"

I didn't really mean to prattle on about Johnny for so long, and at the end of my almost-gibberish sentence, I felt awkward. The chef here was the first person in town who didn't seem to mind my presence so much and now I was going to ruin it by ranting about garbage he didn't even care about…

"It's never too late to call."

I raised my head up at him. Was he serious? He didn't mind? He was giving me advice?

"I… don't think this is something that can be solved with just a phone call, actually," I told him sheepishly. Johnny and I were technically still an item, I guess, and it had been that way for a while now, but even we had our serious moments where we needed time apart.

I did miss him, though. I mean, he was my best friend – besides Hanako, of course – so how could I not?

He shrugged across from me. "Well, maybe you can start with a call. You said you're from the city, right? That means you probably can't go back there on such short notice."

I nodded, following his words. He seemed really caring.

"So maybe you call," he continued, "and you tell him you want to meet up and fix things, and if he agrees to it, great, you're all set. But on the other hand, if he doesn't want to go through with it, you'll have two choices."

I felt my face fall into a grimace, already knowing exactly what those would be. Keep trying to fix things or let it go and move on.

It felt too weird to even think about the second option, but I gulped as I thought about the first.

I hadn't talked to Johnny seriously in over a month already, so it would obviously be weird calling him up all of the sudden. I did have a lot of things to talk about and scold him for, though, and with the chef's determination to help me, I was feeling like maybe I could fix our relationship again.

I was starting a new life here, but that didn't mean I couldn't still be a part of Johnny's, right?

"Thanks," I said, turning in the stool to try and get up. In my haste my mind forgot what I originally came there for, but my body certainly didn't because I felt wobbly in the stool as I moved.

He practically jumped over the countertop to catch me, but I didn't actually fall so it was a wasted effort.

"S-sorry," I mumbled pathetically. That was definitely one of my stupider moments in Oak Tree.

And then I realized what was even stupider.

"So… I still haven't introduced myself yet." In a way, it was kinda funny. We'd just shared a really heartfelt talk while not even knowing each other's name.

"Oh, I already know you," he said nonchalantly, as if my identity was suddenly the most obvious thing in the world. "You're Annie, the new farmer who just moved here from the city, right?"

I nodded slowly. It wasn't that surprising that he'd heard of me already, considering I'd been here for almost a week. Besides, he said his girlfriend was apparently excited to meet me, which meant news of my arrival had traveled pretty much everywhere in town.

He cleared his throat after a few moments. "Well, I should probably introduce myself, too. I'm Raeger, I've lived here since I was ten, I'm twenty-four now in case you're wondering, and I'm bad at making friends."

Hearing that off-the-wall confession made me feel just a little more comfortable, my tension eased, and I smiled. "Nice to meet you, Raeger. You... already know a bit about me, I guess, but my name is Annie. I'm twenty-three, just moved here from the city, and I'm usually not as painfully socially awkward as this encounter may have led you to believe."

He laughed then shook his head. "Yeah. Same here."

I smiled, taking a little more time to glance around the restaurant again. It felt bright, open, and old-timey, in stark contrast to the small cafe-like tables outside just in front of it.

"This place is really - "

GRRRRRLL

Our eyes met briefly until I pulled away my gaze, feeling heat rush up to my cheeks. Never in my life had I experienced the embarrassment of a stomach growl in front of a complete stranger.

Raeger just laughed. "Well, now I know that you didn't come here just to introduce yourself to me."

I heard the sound of a stool running along the floor and looked up to see him walking over to the fridge. He was probably going to prepare something now, and suddenly I grew even hungrier.

"I haven't gone shopping yet or anything, so I don't have much, but I've still got some produce if you're interested." He glanced back at me for a split second. "You kinda seem like a girl who's more vegetable-oriented anyway. You're like Lillie."

I was surprised at how right he was – I was a vegetarian all the way, I don't think I ever liked meat even when I was little – but how could he tell? Did I have a sign on my face or something?

"I am, actually."

He didn't look back again but I could hear the smile in his voice. "You've got a slender frame and you're pretty short, so that's how I know."

"I see..."

Wait, slender? I wasn't exactly a big person, but I liked to think I packed at least a little bit of weight. Must have been all those cucumber sandwiches and their lack of calories over the past week.

And wait, short? Suddenly I felt very self-conscious about my body. Did I look malnourished? I always made sure to get the proper nutrition... It was true, I hadn't grown an inch since I was about ten, but I wouldn't say I was that short...

But he said I was just like Lillie, so that meant we were about the same size, right? I wonder if he ever poked fun at her for being petite, too.

Raeger tended to say whatever was on his mind, didn't he? He seemed like the type who didn't think things through before saying them.

I guess I didn't mind that, though, especially since he led me to call Johnny later that night.

~CGA