Oh my goodness, i am so sorry that i didn't upload in forever.

I went to Otakon as Craig and cosplayed tons of Crenny. I also went through a lot of shit but I'm good now. My goal is to post three chapters by Friday, including this one. so i hope to post Wednesday too. My proof-reader is a trooper.

Please let me know if this good enough to continue! Reviews motivate me.

This chapter is mostly fluff, relationship developement stuff.

I do not own Kagerou Daze or South Park. The respective owners are Hatsune Miku, Matt Stone, and Trey Parker. special thanks to Nicole for proofreading everything~

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Waking up in my bed, I can hear the sound of clocks that seem to ring in my head. What time is it? August fourteenth at twelve something noon, I day outside looks really very nice. Yet I can still hear the cries of the crickets screaming loudly in my head.

I was awoken by the sound of my guinea pig squeaking for no apparent reason. I yelled at him to shut up in my sleepy haze before rolling onto my stomach and shoving my face deep into my pillow. A groan involuntarily left my lips.

He listened to my plea and stopped, leaving the room silent yet again. I could hear nothing but the sound of my clock ticking now.

I felt bad for being so cruel to the poor thing but it seemed that no one was immune to my attitude. He'd never know how much I loved him either way. He'd die soon like they always did and I'd replace him in a couple of days. That's the way it always went.

I turned my head so that my cheek was resting against the cool fabric of my pillowcase. The room was decorated with a bunch if things that I liked. I wondered what Kenny liked.

Not that it mattered now, all of the emotion that he had was taken away with one blow to the side. He was nothing more than an empty vessel now.

I knew that the obvious answer here was that he liked /me/. He liked me and I killed him. I made him chase after that cat when it was never in any danger. I was just being a dick and it cost him his life.

I hadn't really thought about it very much but it really was my fault. I liked to think that if I knew it was the last seconds of his life I would have been a lot nicer. I definitely wouldn't have yelled at him. I did though and I had to live with that until my dying day.

I looked at the clock that hung above my dresser. The time was twelve something and I, of course, had to work at one so I'd probably be late.

The background of the clock almost made me smile as it reminded me of one of the only reasons I stayed alive so long; Ruby. She was a little shit but I'd loved her so much. She had made the clock for me our of a kit she'd bought from WalMart. The background was a crudely drawn guinea pig and one of the hands was on backwards. I wanted to kill myself quite a few times but she pulled me through the most.

She had been practically attached to my hip we were so close, I'd bring her with me when I hung out with my friends. But like most teenage girls she fell in 'love' with someone and deemed the asshat more worthy of her time than me. I didn't blame her, I wasn't the best person ever. I kinda blamed myself for ever thinking that she'd be different than anyone else.

I was making myself feel like shit with all of this idle thinking. I wanted to call out but I knew that my thoughts would eat me alive if I did. At least at work my mind would be too busy. I could get drunk but that wouldn't solve anything.

I pushed myself up and out of bed reluctantly. I worked eight hours today. Joy.

I picked up a clean towel from my chair, where all my laundry was laying, before heading over to the bathroom. I turned the water on and let it warm up while I undressed.

I avoided looking at myself in the mirror, I was always disgusted with what I saw. My eyes somehow caught a glimpse of my figure and decided to disobey my wishes though.

I looked a lot skinnier than I remembered being. My eyes were bloodshot and void of emotion, the bags under them seeming to make them droop. My hair was getting long, or longer than I usually let it get. It was beginning to hang just below my jawline in the back and on the sides. In the front, it hung into my face while swooping off to the side. It had a natural curve to it from all the years of styling.

I didn't even bother to look at my teeth. I pressed my lips together to keep from seeing them at all. The top row wasn't too bad. There were two teeth that were a bit behind the others but they were straight for the most part. The bottom row was the exact opposite. The teeth down there were crooked and sticking out in different direction. I was told that I had a small bottom jaw and that was why it was happening, but I never got it fixed. Since then my wisdom teeth had grown in and fucked them up more. There was no way in hell we'd ever afford braces or good dental and my parents somehow made just enough to be denied state funding. Thanks to our shitty healthcare system, I'd never smile without feeling disgusting.

I hopped in and cleaned myself off. I was used to taking quick showers since we used to have limited hot water. It was a hidden talent of mine. It was the only talent of mine, actually. I wanted to bask in the water all day and lean against the wall until the only thing I felt was the droplets running over my skin. I was pressed on time so I didn't.

I turned the water off and stepped out, grabbing my towel. The cold air wrapped around me like a blanket. It sent a chill down my spine and caused me to shiver a little. I wrapped the towel around my body tightly to try and fight it off.

I hurried to my bedroom across the hallway. I knew that my mom was the only one home but I still didn't want anyone to see my naked body. I had enough self respect for that.

I dropped my towel on the floor and grabbed a clean pair of boxers, slipping them on before my work shirt. It was collared and black, the shitty logo on the left sleeve in bright yellow letters. I hadn't done my laundry recently and I was soon reminded this when I looked to see no washed pants. Well, none that weren't ugly. The only reason that I had a clean shirt was because Clyde used to work with me and when he quit he gave me all of his shirts. I decided that it was best to just wear a pair of pants that I'd worn before as I picked them up from the floor. They were tight but not skin tight, there was room to breathe. I slipped them on before looking at myself in the mirror.

Satisfied, I shoved my wallet and my phone into my pocket before heading downstairs.

I was ready to just leave but my mom called my name from the kitchen and stopped me in my tracks. I turned to see her in the doorway.

"Going to work, sweetie?" She asked. She had been smiling but it seemed to drop when she caught a glimpse of my face. "You look exhausted. Can't you call out?" She took a few worried steps towards me.

I scoffed. "They don't care how tired I am, they'd fire me if I called out. It doesn't matter that I watched some kid die." I could practically hear my manager threatening to fire me. He was such a prick that I knew he'd actually do it.

My mom suddenly went pale as she started at me. I turned my head to look away. Even if she wasn't my real mom, I felt guilty when she was anything other than happy. I heard her heavy steps approaching me, I could have sworn I felt the ground shake under her feet. She suddenly grabbed my shoulders. "Y-you..watched someone...die?" The last word came out in a whisper.

I went wide-eyed immediately. I felt my heart skip at her comment and I was glad I wasn't looking at her. I was angry. How could she forget something so terrible? My voice came out shaky at first. "Are you kidding me? How could you forget?" I felt her hands slide off of me as I got louder. "You fucking picked me up! You were there when they scraped his body off of the cement! You drove for an hour until you ended up pulling over so I could puke my brains out!" My teeth started to grind.

"Craig, honey... I t-think you had a really bad dream. I'm s-" Her voice was meek compared to mine. Fear was apparent in it and I knew I had to leave before I got to worked up.

"Whatever, mom. Fuck off. I'm leaving." I turned away without another word, slipping my shoes on. I slammed the door as I left.

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I couldn't help but wonder if it really was only just a dream. I didn't remember how I had gotten into my bed last night, after all. At the same time, if it was just a dream I wasn't sure what I'd actually done after hanging out with Kenny.

Maybe the whole thing was a dream. Maybe I was actually just waking up from being drunk at Bebe's last night. Why would I dream of waking up in the back of a truck with Kenny though? None of it made sense. I don't think that my mom was dumb enough to forget something like that.

I'd just stop at Kenny's on the way home and see if he's there. If he is, it'll solve a lot. I don't really wanna break down in front of him and I was sure he was going to annoy the piss out of me but I couldn't run forever.

The assistant manager was in today so I wasn't too worried about being caught on my phone. She always made googlie eyes at me like I'd think she was cute or something, which she would be if she wasn't such a bitch. The only thing the girls ever liked about me was my 'bad boy' reputation.

I flipped through the messages that were unread. There were quite a few, most asking me to be safe while others told me not to hesitate to ask if I needed a ride. It made me feel a little less pathetic. I noticed at the time stamps. August thirteenth. I looked at the date on my registers screen to confirm that it was indeed the fourteenth. Relief and sadness both washed over me.

That meant that the party was last night and Kenny was probably alive. That also meant that I had yelled at my mother for no reason though.

I was such a fuck up. I bet she regrets adopting me.

I heard someone set their things on the counter. It was some guy in his late forties who was looking at me expectantly. I shoved my phone into my back pocket as I approached him. I really wasn't in the mood to deal with people but I did anyway. "Hello, how're you, sir?"

Continuing to act like I cared about these deadbeats, I rang them up as quickly as possible. I just wanted to be done with this and leave. I made sure to mentally flip them all off.

Once I'd gotten through the crowd I let out a sigh. I couldn't believe how dumb people were. A nap would be very much enjoyed.

Of course it would be a miracle to have any peace though. The Assistant manager walked up to me with a smile on her face. "You doing okay, Craig? You look tired."

She was giving me that face that I hated. Her eyes got big and she blinked all slow like, her lips hanging slightly open. She shifted her weight onto one leg, shoving her dirty blonde hair back over her shoulder. She was shorter than me by quite a bit. I was somewhere around five nine and she stood about five feet three inches tall. She wore the managers version of my shirt and a pair of faded blue pants, both skin tight.

I knew she would give me anything I asked for, but I didn't really want her to think for a second that I'd ever flirt back. "I just wanna leave." I muttered.

She frowned. "You're so lucky you leave! I'm here until closing!" She slumped forward into the counter with a groan.

"Sucks to be you. Besides, you got model employee A to help you so you'll survive." I was talking about Bradley Biggle, of course.

"Yeah but-" the bell to the front doors rang and I interrupted her almost immediately.

"Hello, how're you?" I said before even bothering to look up at the person. I would take any excuse I could get to ignore her. Once I saw that orange parka though, my heart stopped. Paired with that blonde hair, baby blues and a goofy grin I knew it had to be him.

"Hey, babe. What's cracking?" It was like nothing had ever even happened.

I was like a deer in headlights. I couldn't do anything but stare at him in disbelief. If this was a dream then it was some fucked up shit. I blinked a few times to make sure I wasn't seeing things. He was still there every time I opened my eyes. "Kenny...?" My voice came out weak.

He furrowed his brows. "Yeah, it's me, dude. What's up?" He gave me the same look that my mom had when I left.

"Go wait for me outside." I had regained composure just enough to make demands.

He just chuckled. "Oh c'mon. Are you forcing me out of the store?!"

I flipped him off. "Leave."

"I want the corporate number!" He feigned shock before putting his hands on his hips over dramatically. I just rolled my eyes. "Fine! I won't report you this time since you're so cute." He started backing up towards the door.

"Good, fuck face." I raised my other hand to flip him off as well.

He made guns with his hands, pointing at me as he clicked his tongue suggestively. "I'll be waiting, sexy." I growled and he ran out of the store.

He was so fucking annoying. Why did I ever care about him?

"Wait, you're gay?" My manager asked, looking disappointed.

"Yeah."

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The rest of work was dragging on for what felt like forever. Bradley came in to relieve me of my position, so I wasn't too worried about leaving on time. He was the perfect example of a model employee. He aced the secret shopper with a hundred.

He was so smiley that it made me want to puke. This was like his dream job or something. He asked me the same exact thing everyone else did, and I said I was fine. He said that I looked sad. I said it was because I always was. With a 'feel better' he paused, his fingers fidgeting with each other as his hands hovered over his chest nervously.

I laughed both mentally and bitterly at how he reminded me of Tweek.

I didn't bother to tell the manager that I was leaving, it wasn't like it mattered anyway. She most likely was going to do a three-sixty on me and be a cunt since she knew now that she stood no chance. I threw the tacky apron that I had to wear into the office and my name tag into my back pocket.

The store front was covered in windows, so the transition in lighting on my eyes wasn't too bad when I stepped outside. The temperature change was a different story, it was a lot cooler outside.

The first thing that I always saw when I stepped out was a gorgeous tree line. It stood at the other end of the parking lot, which was built much bigger than it needed to be. It was the only nice thing about living out here, really. The view, that is. I never felt the need to go into them but they still fascinated me.

I figured I'd enjoy a cigarette with my random thoughts, Kenny didn't seem to be around anyway. I'm sure he'd come back, he was too annoying to just leave me alone. This plan was short lived when I heard a voice call my name.

I turned in the direction it came from only to be greeted with a dorky grin. I hadn't even noticed that he was there which kind of scared me. Kenny was propped against the corner of the building, enjoying a cigarette of his own. I licked my lips at the sight of it, I really needed one. He pushed himself up and off of the wall and started towards me. He flicked the ashes away as he spoke. "I charge a hundred an hour, big boy. Twenty extra for kinky shit."

I immediately flipped him off and turned away. I really wasn't in the mood to deal with his shit right now. He tugged me back towards him though before I got too far.

"Chill, dude. I was kidding."

I ripped my arm away from his grasp, turning to look at him with frustration. "I saw you fucking die." I said coldly. "This will never be a joke for me, real or not."

His eyes went wide then darted off of mine. When he laughed, it turned my stomach inside out. This time it wasn't because I didn't like him, hell I was never disgusted with him enough to feel this, but it was because of how melancholy it was. So fucking sad. "You're silly, babe. You must have just had a b-"

"No, it wasn't." The possibility of it being just a dream was pretty high and I knew that's what he was going to say. That laugh convinced me that it wasn't though, something was going on. Even if none of it made sense, I knew something was wrong. "I will never wipe the image from my memory. I can practically smell your blood just thinking about it.." I began to shiver involuntarily as my stomach continue to churn. I was honestly going to blow chunks any second.

He looked at me but it was short lived. As soon as he realized I was staring back at him and our gazes met, his eyes darted away again. "You just had way too much to drink." He raised a finger to scratch his cheek.

Why was he acting like this? I wanted to beat the shit out of him. "How are you alive?!" I raised my voice, tired of this dumb game we were playing. "How, Kenny?!"

He looked a bit surprised before he ended up shaking his head at me. A smile consumed his lips again and he threw his cigarette on the ground. "Come on a date with me!" He began to grin from ear to ear, acting like I hadn't just asked him a question.

"Why are you like this?"

"Because I've been in love with you for God knows how long and now you somehow remember what no one else ever does. Now yes or no?"

"Kenny..wh-"

"That doesn't sound like an answer to me." He frowned.

"Fine, what the fuck ever. You gotta tell me what the hell is happening though." I wasn't going to just do this, I had to get answers.

"Perfect, let's go~" He grabbed my hand in his and I didn't protest. We turned to the right, away from the woods and towards town.

I was hardly paying attention to what he was doing once we started walking. I think it was mainly because I was trying to take my mind off of the fact that we were holding hands. I felt like I had way to much saliva in my mouth and I didn't want to gulp. For some reason I thought he might hear it and there was no way in hell that Kenneth McCormick was going to know that he made me nervous.

He stopped abruptly and I almost ran into his back. If it hadn't been for how far I was dragging behind I definitely would have.

He motioned his hand around like he was Vanna White, presenting the strip in front of us. "Pick a restaurant, any restaurant. It's my treat."

I looked at the options. An Olive Garden, a Chinese place, a burger joint and some high end hibachi. "You can't afford any of this." I said coldly. Really, I just didn't want to be the one to pick. I hated making decisions for other people because I had anxiety, and I usually got worried that I would make the wrong choice. Since Kenny was paying that made it worse. What if he ended up paying for food he didn't want?

"I'm rolling in cash, babe~ What are you talking about?" He raised his brows at me cockily.

I rolled my eyes in response. "Yeah, right."

"I got the money, that's all you need to know. Now pick, I'm starving!" He whined like a kid who was being refused candy.

I couldn't chose so I just went with what I usually ate. "I like Chinese food." I muttered. I actually think that 'like' was an understatement. I really had a problem. I was basically addicted to coffee and Chinese food. I was surprised I didn't look like Cartman, since that was basically my entire diet. I threw up a lot though so it wasn't a shock I guess. From alcohol. Mostly.

"Chinese it is!" He laughed like I told some kind of joke. It made me feel like shit seeing how happy I made him. "This way, my lady~"

"I changed my mind, I wanna go home."

"Too late!"

He practically dragged me there by my arm. I had to admit that I loved how adorable the place was. It was definitely independently owned, this made apparent by the home made screen door. The inside was a lot smaller than it looked, though I think they were all like this.

"Hi, how can I help you?" The lady behind the counter asked with her cute little accent.

"I'll take a General Tso combo." He answered before looking at me expectantly.

"U-uh, same thing." I nodded to her. She picked up a menu and circled the order, scribbling a '2x' beside it. She then handed it to some guy in the back before returning to us.

"It'll be ten minute." She smiled.

"Okay, thanks." He started to tug on my hand to pull me to a table, but I couldn't help but notice that she was staring at it.

Once we sat down I sighed, happy to finally be off my feet. Work had really tired me out. I leaned my head on the table as my arms drooped into my lap.

"You alright?" Kenny's voice sounded so distant. His fingers felt nice though as they moved to brush against my hair. I know I should have been really against him petting me, but it really was calming.

I turned my head so that it was resting on the other cheek and so I could look at him. He smiled softly once our eyes locked. His fingers instead brushed the hair from my face.

"You're annoying." I mumbled, not breaking our gaze. His cheeks were starting to tinge a different color. I was good at noticing the little things, like how his eyes shined brighter in the sunlight and the little freckles that littered his face.

"You're adorable." I brushed his hand away at the comment.

"I'm not adorable. Do I look like a child or something?" I scoffed.

"Nah, I knew you when you were a child. You look a lot different now." His hands folded together on the table in front of him and I was kinda glad that he knew his boundaries.

We have known each other a long time, huh? It kinda felt like yesterday, all those projects together, but it was actually a long time ago. We were adults now. Adults who don't know what we we're doing with our pathetic lives, who were no longer in school and had to work for our money.

"Mmm.. It's been a long time since we hung out."

"Unless you count going to Clyde's."

I dunno why but Clyde really enjoyed Kenny's presence. He was the only one though, since Tweek and Token really weren't fans. And me...I don't know how I felt. "Yeah, but we never really talk when we're at his house together. You guys bullshit while me and the other guys find something else to do."

He went silent for a bit before he spoke again. "It has been a long time than."

I let my eyes fall shut as I tried to bask in the silence that followed. I could have fallen asleep if it weren't for Kenny talking again. "Craig?"

"Hmmm?" I didn't have the energy to form words.

"Uh.. Nevermind. "

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I reluctantly got up and off of the table after he paid for our food. I was under the impression that we were eating there but he clearly had other plans. He was nervous when he asked to hold my hand this time, probably because I'd pushed his hand away before. I said yes for some reason, which I blamed on feeling bad for him since I was so mean. In truth, I think I was just happy he was alive.

We walked on the same stretch of road that we had been on the day before. I unintentionally squeezed Kenny's hand in mine. I was scared. I made him walk on the side towards the ditch while I was closer to the road.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll stay by you today no matter what.." He said in almost a whisper. It made me relax a bit.

We eventually came up to a trail that looked quite sketchy, but anything was better than this cursed road. He didn't really say anything to me about where we were going but I trusted him for the time being.

It was by the old farm so I assumed it was used for that at some point. It was somewhat overgrown now, to the point where I had to watch my every step. No one had taken it in some time but recent enough for us to be able to follow it.

A few animals fled from us as we made our way through the tall grass and snow.

It wasn't too long until we reached a pair of train tracks that intercepted the path. Kenny tugged me off the trail to follow them instead.

There were spots missing that I was sure were stolen by scrapers or people desperate for money. Hell, if I ever got to that point I knew where to come.

The tracks were far more overrun by nature than the trail, clearly having not been used for a very long time. Even so, I was worried that some ghost train would come and snatch him away from me again. I wouldn't let that happen.

He hopped up onto one of the rails and began to walk along it. He kept his right hand in mine while the other raised straight out to help him keep his balance. He was holding the food, which I'd offered to take hold. I guess he was trying to be 'Gentlemanly '.

I wondered if these were the same woods I saw every time I walked out of work. They could have been for all I knew.

When we had first started walking along the tracks the trees were far from them. They seemed to get closer and closer the farther we walked. Then I noticed that they really were. They came so close that, even when I walked in between the rails, I could reach my hand it and touch them. Maybe they'd started clearing to rebuild. That or there was an outbreak of trees right here.

"Where the fuck are we going?" I finally asked, beginning to feel very uncomfortable.

"You'll see, it's a surprise." He winked as his pointer finger covered his lips to shush me.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm walking in the woods, miles from my house and all civilization, with someone that I don't even like. Real surprising..."

"I love you, dude, but shut up."

"You're not going to kill me, right?"

"Why would I buy you Chinese food?"

"To earn my trust! Or as an alibi." I nodded thoughtfully.

"You watch too many movies. Last time I checked I'd be the one to die." He hopped back down onto level ground with me as I watched him with dumb curiosity. His hair leaned in his face but he moved it away with a whip of his head. I was so caught up in staring at the loser that I almost didn't hear him, so I was somewhat confused when we stopped.

"This is it!" He said excitedly. When he turned his head to meet my gaze I looked away quickly.

The first thing I saw was the foreboding fence. It was blocking the train tracks from this point on. A sign lopsidedly hung on the fence, reading "Danger! Keep Out".

It appeared to still be intact at first, which was weird since it looked like people had taken advantage of the rest of it. It wasn't until Kenny started towards the right most edge that I saw it'd been bent open.

He went through first and I prayed to every god that he didn't fall through or anything. He turned to pull me up right after, though the step up was only about two feet I was kinda glad we still held onto me.

Standing up there, I got a better look at everything. The tracks were now surrounded by a wood section, which looked to be holding them up. The wood extended about two feet on either side of them, with a waist high railing. Vines wove in and out of the boards and plants grew from a top of the rotting bridge. It was more sturdy than it looked though. Even so, I checked every board cautiously before putting all of my weight on it.

Walking through the vegetation we came up to a spot that was completely cleared. Boards that looked much safer and more new covered the old ones. An old telescope and what appeared to be a burn mark from a fire were the only things that stood out to me.

"Welcome to my secret hideout! I know, the shitty bridge is the best part~" he was joking, I think. I didn't know with him.

His hand let go of mine and I became aware of how sweaty it was, wiping it on my pants. Fucking nasty.

He dropped the food onto the ground gently. "Look around. The views kinda nice."

I gave a nod of acknowledgement before heading towards the side. I trusted this spot more than the rest of the structure but I was still careful. God knows when this thing was last used.

I got that sudden rush of fear as I looked over the railing. I always got this feeling whenever I looked off of anything over ten feet off the ground. Hell, the second floor of the mall scared me. The drop wasn't too far though, and the water was still. You wouldn't die from this fall. I felt at ease knowing this.

Looking at the surroundings, I determined that we were above a very large lake. Surrounding it was an endless sea of forest. The mountains were set off in the distance, some shrouded in clouds. All in all, the place really was beautiful.

When I turned back to Kenny, he was sitting criss-cross with his hands on his lap, staring right at me. The corners of his lips curled upwards. "Take it all in?"

I sat across from him, letting my legs curl under me. He took the food out, handing me mine first. "It's nice." I mumbled as I took it from him. It was hot, so much so that I had to quickly sit it on the ground.

"Awh, poor Craig's delicate hands~" he teased and I flipped him off.

He handed me my fork. After that, we ate in silence for a bit before he broke the awkward air.

"What's happening between you and Tweek?"

The question was bold and I was a little surprised. It made sense though, since he was trying to earn my affection. I didn't look at him, just stared down at my food, shoving it around with my fork. I took a deep breath. "We dated, the end of middle school and the first year of high school. In that time it felt like we were still the same as always. I think I just wanted him to warm up to me eventually. He never did." I paused as I tried not to let my emotions get the best of me. "It was hard, I really liked him. The most we ever did was hold hands and I kissed his head. I think we only actually kissed like twice. I understood, but in the end he told me I pressured him too much. I made him do things he didn't want to and he didn't feel the same. So he ended it, and I felt worthless. I fucked up the one good thing I had. Now he barely talks to me." I was letting it all out to someone who could turn around and throw it in my face. I trusted him though.

"That really fucking sucks, I'm sorry." He sounded truly sympathetic and it made me feel like a little piece of the world was lifted from my shoulders.

I shook my head, a smile forcing it's way onto my lips. "Ya know, that's the first time I ever talked about this with anyone. We kinda kept it a secret, so no one knew. Not even Token. It feels good.."

"Hey, I'm here for ya." I glanced up to see him pretending to pull the strings together in his hoodie. "My hoodie is sealed! I won't say a word."

"Thanks.." I nodded. I had a question of my own, one that I'd wondered about this morning and that was now resurfacing in my mind. "Hey, what kinda things do you like?" I muttered, half hoping he didn't hear it.

He seemed eager to answer though. "I like you, of course!" He started chuckling, his eyes always on me. "I also really like NASCAR, and drawing is fun but I'm not very good." He tugged the back of his neck nervously. "Are we playing twenty questions?"

"No."

"Can I ask you something else?"

"Whatever."

"Do you think you could ever fall in love with me? Like ever?"

I didn't want to answer this, I knew the answer was yes. I was a weak sack of shit that would probably fall in love with anyone who tried hard enough. Kenny was a good looking guy and he seemed plenty interested. I kind of saw me in him though, the me that was trying to get Tweek to love me for so long. "Do I have to answer that..?"

"Why else would I ask?" He slumped.

"Yes. I think I could."

"Then I'll never give up." He grinned. His teeth were just as crooked as mine but he didn't seem to care at all.

"Holy shit, what have I done. Now you'll never le-"

"Dance with me!"

"What? Why?" I furrowed my brows, looking at him.

"Yeah, I wanna dance!" He rose to his feet, outstretching his hand for mine. "It's okay, you can step on my feet. I'll teach you to be good."

"To what music?" I was clearly trying to talk my way out of this.

"I have a phone, dipshit."

"I hate you." I stood up on my own, knocking his hand away. "What kind of song? Because I don't dance, and I'll be damned if you think I'm going to start bumping and rubbing on you." I did dance. A lot. That was when I was alone though, I wouldn't start dancing in front of him.

His fingers tapped at the screen on his phone for a moment before music started playing. He sat his phone on the ground and started shaking his hips a bit. The song was upbeat and most definitely by Maroon 5.

He started advancing towards me and I, in return, backed away. "C'mon, fucker. Just a little bit of dancing won't kill you." He reached out for me and I narrowly dodged him.

"No."

"Fine, but only because you're so fucking gorgeous today and if I scared you away because of this I'd be depressed." He proceeded to stare at me like I had something on my face.

"What?" I was resisting the urge to squirm under his gaze.

"Promise me you'll do a slow dance with me.."

"Why?"

"Humor me, please. In all seriousness it would mean the world to me."

I sighed, swallowing all the saliva in my mouth. "Fine."

The excitement on his face read similar to that of a dog about to get a treat. He scurried to his phone, picking it up long enough to change it to a song a lot slower. I knew the song as soon as the first note played. Gorillaz; Melancholy Hill. I always swore this would be one of the songs I danced to if I ever got serious with anyone. I want serious with Kenny but I decided that I'd let it slide because of the whole dying thing.

Kenny looked nervous as he approached me and it made my heart skip a beat. He almost looked cute. In the kind of way that a shy kid asking a beautiful girl out to prom is. I didn't understand why I had this effect on him but it made me kind of happy.

He took my hands and guided them up onto his shoulders. My fingers curled into the fabric gently, his own sliding down to my hips where they rested.

When he swayed, so did I. At one point I practically stomped right on his foot. He just chuckled. "You can step on my feet. It's all right, just relax a little."

I took a deep breath, my heart racing as I moved my arms to wrap around his neck instead. I paid attention to my movements, looking to my feet every once in a while. "You should feel lucky, I didn't even dance at prom."

"You went to prom?" He sounded surprised, like he thought he'd known everything about me and I ruined it.

It kinda hurt that he hadn't even noticed. The person who was supposed to be madly in love with me didn't know I went to a function he did a month ago. "Kenny, I can't do this.." I tried to push him away but his arms wrapped firmly sound me and held me on place.

"Craig..." I couldn't look at his disgusting face so I turned my head away.

"I don't want to play this game. I don't need to be used and tossed aside like you do to everyone."

"It's not a ga-"

"You didn't even notice that I was at prom. I went with Kyle for crying out loud! I was with your best friend and I'm supposedly the love of your life but you didn't know that much?"

"I didn't know Kyle went either!"

I finally wormed my way out of his grasp. He got my wrist as I tried to walk away though. "Fuck you, Kenny."

"I didn't know it meant that much to you. I'm sorry, this is all my fault. I got drunk before I went because I was going with Tammy and that made me unhappy. I wanted to go with you. I didn't think you'd ever go though, and Kyle is almost more apathetic than you at this point. The only way he tells me shit is if he's drunk.."

Had he really been drunk..? I could feel my expression soften and my eyes threaten to water. I blinked quickly to prevent them from getting a chance. "I...I guess I just wanted someone to notice me... I'm sorry.."

He slipped his hand from my wrist down to hold my hand. "Plenty of people notice you." His thumb stroked the skin on the back of my hand and it felt good. I felt safe letting my guard down.

"Hah, sure.." Clyde and Token were too busy with Nicole and Bebe and Kyle never really liked me. He just needed a substitute that he could pretend was Stan.

"The same goes for me then." He nodded and I wasn't sure what he meant. That no one really cared for him either. I guess that was true, except maybe I did. "Hey, just out of dumb curiosity, did you and Kyle.. No, nevermind. It's not my business."

"We made out for a long time and I thought that maybe he was gonna try to do something and maybe I'd let it happen. He got up and suddenly left though." I answered truthfully. I knew Kyle wasn't into me but I also knew there were rumors around school about him sleeping around. I knew why he did it, I think that the way I felt that night was the way he felt all the time. He just wanted to feel something from anyone because he couldn't get it where he really needed it. I was, admittedly, ready to fuck him for the same reason. I was fucked up, I needed something to let me know I was alive still. I was still a virgin and I had been so eager to give it up. I think Kyle respected me too much to use me. I dunno.

Kenny sighed like he was thinking the same about his friend. I could tell he was worried for him too. "He'll be all right." I assured him. "Someone will come along and save him from himself. I know you don't want to hear this but you can't do anything besides listen and be there for him."

"Maybe I could-"

"No. I know what he's going through and you can't do anything."

He looked genuinely sad at that, but his face soon perked up. "Hey, does that mean I'm the person who's saving you?"

I wanted to laugh sarcastically or make a rude comment but instead I got flustered. Maybe he was. I felt like my life was completely different when he was around. It could have been the whole dying thing but who knows. I shouldn't be getting all flustered either way.

"Shut up." I retorted and he grabbed my other hand as well.

With a quick tug he pulled me into him. I was surprised he didn't stumble back the way I collided into his chest. I was too surprised to act as he pressed his forehead to mine when I tried to look up at him. My eyes darted all over his face, searching every inch for an answer as to what was happening.

When he finally said something, it came out gruff and low. "Make me."

I'd be lying if I said that his voice alone didn't made the blood rush below my belt. "So you want me to smack the shit out of you.."

He laughed breathily. "I'm into it~" I couldn't respond for, right after the comment, his lips pressed into mine firmly. I pushed at him half-heartedly, kind of liking the way it made me feel. He pulled back but it was replaced with another kiss, then another. They started getting longer and longer and before I knew it his tongue was prodding at mine.

I parted my lips to allow entrance. The wet muscle slid against mine and I sighed into his mouth with pleasure. I moved my hands to grab his forearms tightly as his fingertips dug into my hips. The power he was using to hold onto me only turned me on more. The hornier I got, the sloppier our make out session turned.

I know that most people wanted their first time to be slow and meaningful, but I knew it'd hurt either way. There was no way I was topping Kenny either. I wanted him to fuck the shit out of me with those skilled hips.

Fear was flooding me like it'd infected my blood though. I was terrified at the same time. I'd never done anything more than give a blow job to Thomas, and even then I'd practiced and researched like it was some test. I suddenly wanted to stop. I was panicking for no reason but I didn't have the will power to pull away. I was starting to feel similar to what I imagine Tweek felt and immediately felt like shit.

By some miracle it was like he knew and he stopped. His face was flushed and he was panting slightly. I looked away, beyond embarrassed.

"Craig, I don't want you like this until your ready. This is too much in the heat of the moment, I don't want you to regret it."

I just nodded and wiped my mouth on my sleeve. The taste of his lips lingered I'm my mouth no matter how much I swallowed. "Can..we go home now.."

"Of course." His voice as calm as always, like nothing had happened. I heard a step follow his cheery voice. He planted a quick kiss on my head then walked away.

When I looked up he was taking his phone from the ground and putting it in his pocket. I took a deep breath to try and slow my heart down. After I felt calm enough, I made my way to our food, picking it up and dropping it into the bag. After it was all in there, I stood up straight and held it out for him to take. He'd carried it here so I figured he'd want to carry it back.

He took it, as well as my hand, and we started to walk back.

We were quiet, he walked on the rail again with rather good balance. It was nice to be worth him like this.

"I'm glad you didn't murder me.." I mumbled, getting an immediate laugh from him.

"I would never." He squeezed my hand in his. "I'm glad that you didn't have to see me die again."

"Fuck, yeah."

I looked at him as he watched his feet, making sure to not fall. He'd take me down with him if he did.

Trying to not be creepy, I looked off to the opposite side and into the vast rows of trees. I could get lost out here so easily. At this point, it sounded like a better fate than living in South Park. Plus, Kenny might be safer. Not that I cared that much.

"Hey, can I come out here sometime? Like, if I need to just get away from something for a while."

"Of course. Just don't bring anyone besides me~ I keep this place a secret from everyone but you." He peered at me through bright eyes.

"How do you know no one else found it?"

"I don't, I guess. I keep it really hidden, though. That's why the fence is open at a spot where you wouldn't see it easily, and why I didn't clear out the first half of the bridge." He nodded in agreement with himself. In agreement with what, I dunno. "A lot of people would either be to lazy to break through the fence, or would be to scared to venture to far into the brush where you can't see anything. I can't die so I wasn't really worried."

"Smart." I hadn't really thought of it too much since I'd trusted him to lead me in but it really was a good idea. Maybe he wasn't as dumb as I thought.

Maybe Kenny really was a good guy who actually loved me. Maybe he really did just take me out here to earn my trust and not betray me. Maybe he really was just too miserable to go to prom sober.

He was the only person I had right now, whether I liked it or not. He was the person who could keep me alive.

"Ahh! Fucking, bug."

His sudden talking scared me, making me jump a bit. I turned my head quickly to look at him. "You okay?"

I was surprised to see him still standing and exactly the way I'd seen him last. His gaze was fixed on his shirt though, and I followed it to see the source of his scare. "Yeah, it's just a cricket. I'm just always on edge though. It makes it worse that you're right beside me."

"You think I could come back if I died?" I couldn't l help but stare at that fucking cricket. I don't know why, but it was like I knew it was a bad omen. Suddenly, it made that dumb sound that they made and it echoed through my ears. Then I heard it, the sound of millions surrounding us.

"Maybe...I don't wanna find out." I was so scared, I froze, stopping in my tracks. Kenny obviously didn't notice until my arm wouldn't let him go further. "Craig...?"

The cricket jumped onto my leg and I felt like it was looking at me. I squished it with my free hand as sweat dripped down my forehead.

"We have to go."