Chapter 8 – Illusion Reset

It had struck her the instant she put a foot in the school. Someone had put a Boundary Field. On her territory. On her own school.

'Well, someone has a death wish.'

She walked in the main building in quick angry strides, her usual mask of "School idol" cracking with each step. And right when she thought she couldn't be any angrier, she saw him eyeing her from the other side of the passageway. The playboy was surrounded by three girls, but it was clear he didn't care a bit about them. It shouldn't have fazed her, as she was used to his filthy gaze. Usually, it was insistent, but never to this degree. She could see the lust dripping from his mind, disgusting her to a frightening degree, giving her her usual composed attitude back at the same time. She stopped, took a deep breath, and continued on her way again.

She headed for the source of the power, pulsating from the roof. She found the seal traced on it. She almost tried to wipe it out immediately in her anger, but she knew better. Whoever had done this needed a lesson. And she would be the one giving it to the fool who dared act on her turf as if it was his.

'This is a classic. Particularly effective at keeping bystanders at bay...There is a similar one at the mansion. But this one is way more powerful, and the process used to set up the boundary field is different. Plus, it is centered around a core...'

The sheer shock stopped her train of thoughts in their tracks.

'Emyia...Shirou...'

She fell back on her rear, her mind in a shamble. Her train of thought was accelerating dangerously, giving in to delusions. Who the hell had he angered so much that they wiped him out? What would the fallout on her own family be? Where did the attackers came from? Who were they? Did they know about her?

Several other similar interrogations sprout in her head before she came to her senses.

'I'm not thinking right. And right now, I need it desperately.' She slapped herself, the pain giving her the clarity of thought she had called for.

'Alright. It is unlikely Emyia himself is linked to any magi besides Sakura. So...If he's being held up somewhere, it means that someone is trying to attack the Matou family. They couldn't possibly know about me being linked to him anyway. So the only person he holds any value as a hostage is Sakura.

There's no choice...I must ask her what she intends to do.'

She quickly got to the Archery club, calling for Mitsuzuri the instant she entered the range.

"Excuse me, could you fetch Mitsuzuri-san for me? I need to talk to her, it's important."

"I'll go get her."

"Thanks."

Ayako quickly appeared, still wearing her usual training gear.

"Could you spare me a minute please? I need to talk to you, privately, if possible."

"...Alright."

They walked to the back of the range, Ayako looking at her friend worriedly.

"What's going on?"

"When did you last saw Sakura?"

"Yesterday morning, she didn't come to the club since. What, something happened?"

"In all honesty, yes. But stay out of it, and don't ask for the police or the teacher's help. It's a personal matter. Alright?"

Ayako sighed in defeat in front of her friend's behaviour.

"Alright...But I don't like it, not one bit."

"I didn't expect you to. Anyway, I have another question. Was there anything odd in Sakura's behaviour the last few days?"

"Besides yesterday, no."

"Yesterday?"

"Yeah, on the morning training. She was completely quiet, stiff ass a board when shooting too. I know she isn't the talkative type too usually, but not to this degree. She looked like when she first entered the club, no smile, no reaction, no nothing. She had come a long way since then, so I hoped whatever was making her anxious was getting better, but it seems like it's not the case."

She looked in Rin's eyes, her arms clutching, expecting her answer.

"Do you know what's making her like that?"

"I have no idea. I'm not really close to her, anyway."

"But close enough to care for her wellbeing?"

"...Thanks for your help, Mitsuzuri."

"Good luck, Tohsaka."

She walked hastily tin the direction of the Emyia household, trying as hard as she could to decipher what was happening, and keeping her rising anxiety in check.

'So...She got back to how she behaved a little less than a year ago, when she started visiting him on a regular basis. I thought that she had opened up not only to him, but apparently not. So...What the hell could have happened to make her go back to how she was before meeting him?

...

Oh god.

Please, Emyia, please be alive...'

She finally got to his house, ready to knock, when the door flew itself open. Shirou Emyia was in front of her. At first he didn't recognize her, as his eyes were focused on something beyond her, solely, entirely focused. He seemed to be in a daze, and it took him time to finally notice her, even though she was in front of him.

In a split second, she saw it. The sorrow, the unbelievable pain that filled his eyes flared up, took fire instantly, piercing her with a burning anger. She could almost read it in his eyes, his silent scream, an inch away from escaping his lips.

{0}

'You...

You all...

How could you?

Did you know it would turn out like this?

You knew, I'm sure you knew.

How could you be so sorely mistaken?

How can you treat your own daughter like a bargain chip?

I don't understand.

I don't understand.

I can't understand.

But I know...I know I must do something. If I can't, I'll go insane.

Anything to make it right, to make everything right. But I can't, I know I can't.

That won't stop me from trying.

I open the door. She's in front of me. At first, I ignore her. But then I remember.

She's guilty.

She's as guilty as her monster of a father.

She should have done something. She should have rebelled, she should have taken her away from them.

But she didn't do anything. She probably is telling herself she can't do anything, that she must obey her father's will.

Because if not, she would see...She would see how cruel, how ugly she...They are.

All of them.

Magi...That's how they think. Magic is more important than people. Their own children are nothing but a mean for their family to achieve power.

They disgust me. The sickness wells up in my throat.

I can feel my own anger burning uncontrollably at the sight of her, feeding on itself.

Until it breaks every restraint in my mind, leaving me with nothing but a desire...

KILL HER.'

"YOU ANIMA..."

As my sight fades away, I can see the fear in her eyes.

{0}

He falls to the ground, like a puppet having its strings cut. She just stood here, paralyzed by terror.

The coldness of a voice takes her by surprise, and shakes the young witch out of her daze.

"You have to understand that I didn't do it to protect you. I did it to protect him from his own anger, and to protect your sister from the guilt of your death. Now come in and don't speak, I don't think she even noticed him leaving. Don't worry, I'll bring him in."

By reflex, she almost stepped back.

"Don't."

The command was as abrupt as it was absolute. It was the voice of someone who wielded power in a profoundly intimate way, and had no quarrels about using it to achieve their own ends. It was the voice she imagined she would have once her training was over.

It was absolutely terrifying.

{0}

Caster held the boy in her arms, bringing him back to the living-room, where Sakura still hadn't lifted her head. The Tohsaka girl was quietly following behind, sitting at the table in front of her sister. She gently approached the violet-haired girl, putting her to sleep while sustaining her head, lowering her gently.

"Now...What are you doing here?"

"I...I came to check up on Emyia-kun. Because of the Boundary Field, I was afraid something might have happened to him."

"The Boundary...Oh! Right. I had forgotten about it...Of course."

The two of them fell silent as Caster pondered on what to do. As her gaze fell on the two teenagers asleep, she finally spoke to her, without bothering to look at her.

"She didn't see you, of that I am sure. I'll just have to erase his memories."

"What...Why?"

"You disgust me. I want nothing to do with your family. You will leave us three, as well as the boundary field, alone. As you always had, in the end. Stay away from her. Stay away from him. If you have one shred of decency left in you, that's what you'll do.

Now go."

{0}

Sakura woke up, the sunlight piercing through the stores blinding her. A gentle voice called out to her.

'That kind of voice...It's so gentle...I must be still dreaming.'

"Sakura, wake up. We need to talk before Shirou wakes up."

"Caster-san? What..."

It was only then that the reality finally dawned onto her, as her memories of the previous night rushed up to her mind. Despair assailed her once more, but all of it dissolved when two soft hands landed on her cheeks, holding her head high.

"Sakura? What is it that frightens you so?"

"Senpai...I'm sure he hates me now...He can't even look at me, all he sees is...That dirty body of mine. I should go...I must go. I don't want to see it, I don't want to see it..."

She began sobbing as her face slowly fell in the lap of Caster. Her hands stroked her hair, in long, slow movements.

"Sakura. Did you see him? After you finished."

"No, I...I just couldn't..."

"You should have looked. You would have seen it, in his eyes. The immense, crushing sorrow he felt...And the anger that was born of it. He tried to leave the house. He wanted to kill your...He wanted to kill the man that claims to be your grandfather. His grandson to, I believe. And he would have, had I not stopped him."

She finally lifted her head, looking confused.

"I...I don't understand...I don't...Why? Why would he?"

"Can't you see how much he cares about you?"

"But...It's just not me. Whoever her thought Sakura Matou was, she's nothing but a delusion. Now that he's seen all of me, he can't...He just can't see me in the same way. That's just not possible."

Silence stretched, as Caster choose her words carefully. It seemed as though one misstep would lead to the girl shattering like glass, irremediably destroying what was left of her. But for as long as she tried, she couldn't find anything to say. Nothing but long patient care and love could ever bring her back what she had lost, if she ever could. And even then, that was if someone ever accepted her.

The sad thing was, no one would. No one ever would. Despite what they said, despite their claims, everything would fall apart in the end, and hope would turn to ash, leaving only betrayal's sour taste in her mouth.

So really, it was for the best. It would mean that she would continue dreaming her delusion at his side, and he wouldn't have to turn his back on her, like all the others.

The dream could go on, a little longer.

But...

What if...What if he made it right? What if he didn't cast her away, what if he stood by his word? Surely, if someone could, it was him.

Him that was so twisted, so profoundly unique.

No.

She couldn't let herself think such a thing. She couldn't let herself fall down this pit...

Because in the end, she feared that she would be right more than if she was wrong. At least, if he betrayed her, it would all make sense, and everything would end the way it always did. Because if he didn't...If he didn't, then it would all have been for nothing.

His very choice would forever make her very life meaningless, by taking a way none had ever took before.

So there never was any choice. Not really, anyway. It would be frighteningly easy. In a blink, their memory of the night would be gone.

And the illusion that was Sakura Matou would remain untouched, pure.

Her right hand covered in purple hair, and her left one in red hair, she began her silent Aria.

When he woke up, the sun was already up.

'Guess I've overslept...I hope they won't be too mad at me. I must have been exhausted to sleep this long.'

Shirou got up, taking his time for once. He made his way to the kitchen, left untouched, and began cooking a light breakfast. He left it to simmer, walked to the outer-building, and knocked on Caster's door.

"Caster? Breakfast is ready."

"I'll be here at once."

They sat at the table, eating in comfortable silence, until he remembered something.

"Caster? Did you finish deciding what my training will be?"

For a split second, her gaze seemed distant, unfocused. When she turned her gaze back on him, she shook herself out of it.

"Hum...Yes. We'll start by testing your practical abilities, mainly with Projection, see where you're at. But first, you need to learn how to properly use your magic circuits."

A smile strechted on his lips, as he now saw his goal not as an everdistant horizon, but as a reality.

A/N: Sorry for the hiatus, but I somehow managed to lose my way in the process of writing this chapter. Anyway, here's your Christmas present y'all! Thanks for your support, and a Merry Christmas to all of you.