Chapter 3

"Ivan?"

The air in Natalia's lungs escaped out her throat. Time slowed down so that every second felt like an hour

What was he going to say, seeing her like this? Without him, with some boy. And feeding her cake? Well, he didn't see her, right? But if he opened the door as soon as she took a bite , he at least saw Alfred pat her on the head. Were head pats inherently romantic? She searched her mind for any reference of friendly head patting. None found.

Ivan was close now. Natalia's chest burned. Something knotted in her stomach. In a flash hormone-filled adrenaline, Natalia stood up quickly, causing a loud screech to sound as the stool scraped against tile ."Iv—"

"Hello, Arthur, just a small black coffee." Her brother greeted the barista with a warm smile.

Natalia watched him, waiting for him to say something to her. Her mind came up with a million scenarios and an answer to each of them. She braced herself, but Ivan said nothing. When Arthur handed him the coffee, Ivan turned and seated himself in one of those comfy-looking bean bags. He retrieved a small book from his coat pocket and began to read.

Natalia collapsed onto her chair, crestfallen.

He was ignoring her.

Alfred glanced at her, frowned, then turned towards Arthur. "We'll take the cake to go."

Arthur studied Natalia with a confused look. "Your friend looks a bit glassy-eyed there. Is she okay? What happened?"

"One, no. Two, I'd really appreciate it if you'd stop being so nosy." The edge to his voice was completely different from his usual, sunny self.

He turned to Nat, his expression soft. He nudged her shoulder lightly "Come on, Nat...let's...er, go."

Nat followed him out of the coffee shop. Once they were a block's distance away, she grabbed at her own hair, pulling at her scalp before laughing maniacally. "Jesus, Fuck!" She cried. The street was mostly empty, but a housewife across the street shot daggers towards the two of them.

She twirled around to face Alfred then pulled him by the lapels of his jacket, bringing her face near hers. "You must think I'm a crazy person, right? Like some type of incestuous freak?"

He knit his brows. "Nat, is that a scar under you eye? And are you—oh my god, you're tearing up. Hold on, I think I have a handkerch—"

She pushed him away, and wiped her tears away with her sleeve. Then she walked ahead, a bounce in her step.

"No, but really. Everyone thinks I'm weird now, right? Now that this incest rumor is spreading around campus like some "

Alfred matched her pace. "I'd tell you that rumors come and pass in a school as big as the World Academy, but something tells me you wouldn't listen."

"Smart boy."

"And that most people already know the two of you are adopted, so it's not that weird."

"Yep."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"You said you were going to be my 'guardian angel'. Why don't you go ahead and do that?"

…

Classes resumed on Tuesday. She still sat behind Ivan. The back of his head was prettier than most people Natalia knew. And she was lucky that it was; Ivan didn't turn around once to face her. He was always quiet during class, only talking when talked to, and he hardly fidgeted out of place. Natalia had counted three different instances when he talked independently over the past week—once to use the pencil sharpener, and another two times to go to the bathroom.

Natalia sank back in her chair, glancing once to the left and another to the right. Except for the occasional stare, there was no sign that anyone even remembered what Natalia had done the week before. I guess Alfred was right, she thought to herself with a grumble. She dragged her fingers down her cheeks and rested her face in her palms. Maybe she overreacted back there. She let out a breathy groan. Natalia hated being wrong. The bell rang, and she penciled in the last of her notes before packing up her bag.

She was about to leave class, when the teacher stopped her, handing Natalia a flyer for mock trial. "I heard you were on your last school's debate team. Mock trial seems like a good fit for you."

"No thanks," she said, pushing the flyer back towards him. At her old school, she only chose to join the debate team because the classroom was right next the field where she could watch Ivan during track practice. There really was no need for that.

Not to mention, Alfred was still on her mind.

She rushed out the classroom. What class was he in in the first place? Natalia was sure he would have mentioned it once or twice—the boy constantly talked, and Natalia started to regret blocking out everything he said to her.

Well, not regret regret. She would definitely ignore him again if he went and flapped his mouth a bunch at her. But she did admit to herself that she felt a bit bad.

She thought about it as she walked herself all the way back to the girls' dorm, her shoulders hanging a bit lower than usual.

"Oh, thank you so much, Alfred!"

"No problem, ma'am! Let me know if there's anything I can do!"

Natalia stopped in her tracks. Her memory played back; Alfred liked to help the cleaning ladies sometimes. She inhaled sharply and upturned her nose. "Alfred," she said with a curt.

"Oh, hey Nat. I was wondering—do you wanna join my study group?" He smiled.

Natalia knit her brows. "What?"

"Well, the librarian says we need five people to rent out a study room. We only have four—me, Liz, Matt, and Rod. S—"

"You're talking to me." She narrowed her eyes.

He blinked in confusion. "Er, yeah? It's not like you're a ghost who nobody can see...wait—" his eyes widened—"are you a—"

"No." Natalia told him in a tone blunter than usual. "But I swore I scared you off by now. Y'know with how I acted yesterday..."

Whenever she had an outbust, Ivan would avoid her weeks at a time. She remembered when she was about thirteen, he avoided her for two entire months, not even calling her down for meals.

"Really?" He cocked a brow at her. "You think you were acting up? One time, I locked my own brother out of our house when he was a jerk to his girlfriend." He pointed to his own chest. "And while he was climbing into the bedroom window, I cut holes into all of his shirts! What happened yesterday was barely a spat." He ruffled her hair. "Chill, it's fine."

"I...I see." His kindness was strange. Natalia was expecting to be punished, isolated for what she had done. With him being so friendly, she almost felt guilty—like a kid who stole from the cookie jar and got away with it.

"Is there something wrong?" He started to walk. She followed

"You really shouldn't be so nice," she admitted. "I did something wrong."

"Ivan was being a jerk. He deserved it."

"No," she shook her head, and pressed a hand to her chest. "I deserved it. I'm the one who embarrassed him in front of all his classmates, who made some crazy rumor spread about him. What I did when I first came to this school...I acted out of line—I guess the thrill of a new school got to me. I should have waited for Ivan to tell me what to do."

"Wait, Nat. Have you ever disobeyed Ivan?"

"I would never dream about it! Not since we were kids."

He let out a low whistle. "Sounds shitty."

"It was fine. I owe it to Ivan. He protected me when we were younger. If it takes my freedom to have Ivan's care and affection, then I think it's worth it."

They reached the clear, glass doors of the library. Alfred opened the door, and in a bowing gesture, motioned Natalia to enter. "Well, whether you like it or not, now you've got your freedom. What're you going to do with it?"