I write about as slowly as George R. R. Martin, but nowhere near as well (Get on those books, Georgey. I want to know about Mrs Snow.)

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight. But if I did I'd probably write a bunch of fanfiction about it. Just for fun.

Chapter 13

I'd had a few first kisses in my time. First kisses were supposed to be soft and hesitant. And they were also almost always awkward. Well, at least mine were. It's your opportunity to test your physical compatibility with a person, your chemistry, and because you don't want to risk destroying a potential relationship, first kisses are usually very tentative and set at a slow pace. There wasn't supposed to be any groping or unwarranted tongue action. They were polite and…nice.

This wasn't a normal first kiss.

This time, Edward's lips were frozen under my own. But that didn't last very long. It only took about a half a second before his lips began moving passionately against mine as I breathed him in, one hand cradling the back of my head and tangled in my hair as the other went to the small of my back, pulling me closer, pressing me against him. My own hand grabbed at the nape of his neck while the other remained bunched in the fabric of his shirt.

I could hear my heart beat in my ears as I flicked my tongue against his bottom lip, tasting the saltiness and cinnamon and Edward. He made a small grunting noise and tilted his head, deepening the kiss and parting his lips. His tongue was timid as it quickly brushed against my own before retreating back. I moaned at the taste, but it wasn't enough. I thrust my own tongue into his mouth, trying to get the taste back, and brought my hands to his broad shoulders, pulling him even closer. I felt his hand move to my hip before creeping up, up, up to the just underneath my breast, just running his thumb back and forth and making his way closer to my straining nipple. Another moan escaped me, and I felt Edward's wet tongue caressing my own, far less tentative now.

I was starting to get lightheaded and pulled away from his lips with a gasp, eyes closed as I tried to catch my breath. I gasped again as I felt Edward's mouth at my throat, placing open mouthed kisses on the side of my neck, and then biting down slightly. I whimpered and began to unconsciously rub up against the thigh that was planted between my legs, seeking some sort of friction as one of my hands travelled to the top of his head and began tugging at his soft coppery-bronzy-umber-whatever hair.

"Bella," he breathed against my throat, never letting his mouth leave my skin. I felt a hardness pressing into my belly and I couldn't stop myself from pressing back.

Edward made a strangled noise before placing wet kisses up my throat, along my cheek, and then crushing his lips back to mine and forcing his tongue back into my mouth. As if I would resist.

Edward began gently pushing me backwards, and I stumbled until I felt the cold wood of the cabin against my back. Both his hands suddenly moved to the back of my upper thighs, right below my ass, and lifted me. I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist and shuddered as I felt his hardness pressing against my right there, where I was aching. For him. I could feel everything through the thin barriers of our pyjama pants, and my head fell back against the wall as the pleasure overtook me, my eyes closing as I began panting in time with Edward's thrusts.

"Yes," I breathed, tugging harder on Edward's hair and rubbing myself against him. My eyes rolled to the back of my head as I let myself feel what I hadn't felt for so long.

But then the thrusting stopped, and Edward's head fell onto my shoulder as he quickly said "Wait, wait, wait, wait."

"What?" I exhaled, trying to catch my breath. I swivelled my hips slightly to get him moving again, but Edward let out a pained groan and stilled my movements with his hand. I felt his hot breath coming quickly on my neck, and I was glad that he seemed to be as affected as I was.

We both took a couple of minutes to calm down and I impatiently waited for him to explain himself.

When he didn't say anything I bitingly asked, "What? Did you come?"

He barked out a sharp laugh. "Shut up," he groaned in amusement, and I felt his lips curl into a quick smile against my neck.

He took a steadying breath before leaning back and looking up at me, his eyes questioning and…nervous?

"We should…take it slow, right?" He asked hesitantly.

I blinked at him, completely lost. "What?" I asked again.

Edward, too, looked unsure, but when he spoke again he was firm, "This. We should take it slow." It wasn't a question this time.

I turned my face to the side, unable to look him in the eyes and still trying to come to terms with what I was feeling.

"This isn't about sex for me, Bella. And…" he broke off, frowning and looking confused.

I opened my mouth to reply but found myself lost for words. Instead of speaking, I sighed and lowered my legs from around his waist. Once my feet were firmly on the ground I dropped my arms from his neck and wrapped them around myself, looking down at my toes, though I couldn't take a step back from him because I was still pressed against the wall. He was too close for me to think clearly. I could still feel his touch burning my skin, though his own hands were now by his sides. He patiently waited for me to speak and made no move to touch me again.

"What's it about, then?" I eventually asked, and I hated how small and scared my voice was.

"Are you really going to make me say it?" Edward asked, and I looked up and saw his brow arched and his lips turned up slightly.

"Say what?" I asked in confusion.

He sighed in mock exasperation and crossed his arms, "Fine, I'll say it, but only if you say it back."

"Say what?" I asked in annoyance now. I couldn't understand how he could go so quickly from serious to jesting.

His teasing expression suddenly turned gentle, one arm fell to his side as the other reached out towards me. The back of his hands finally came in contact with my cheek, caressing with impossible reverence.

"I like you, Bella," Edward said softly.

And as fucking cliché and high school as it all was, I couldn't help the quiet sigh that escaped me. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch, my body instantly relaxing.

Then Edward opened his fucking mouth again.

"Now you have to say it back."

My eyes flew open and I glared at his cocky fucking smirk.

"Fuck off," I replied sharply.

His grin widened, "I'll take that as an 'I like you too, Edward.'"

I pushed his arm away from me and scowled at him, "You're so annoying."

"You bring out the worst in me," I was about to retort but he spoke over me, "Anyway, we were having a somewhat important conversation, weren't we?"

That shut me up pretty quickly. My mouth snapped shut and I nodded once, my scowl disappearing in my nervousness.

"So," Edward began, his vibrant eyes fixed on my own, not allowing me to look away, "We've established that we're two adults that like each other. I'm very attracted to you, you're insanely attracted to me."

I kicked him in the calf. He smiled quickly but genuinely in response before the intense expression took over his features once more.

"We work together, which is a complication, yes, but isn't necessarily a deal breaker. Especially because we're both very good at our jobs and wouldn't do anything to jeopardise our careers."

He paused and raised his eyebrows at me, as though looking for my agreement, so I nodded quickly in response.

"So here's what I think," he took a tiny step towards me, his body was so close that my chest grazed against his every time I took a breath, "We take it slow. We get to know each other a little better. You keep talking to me and I'll keep talking to you. Then we'll see how we feel."

I let out a breath I didn't realise I'd been holding, "That's it?" I asked breathlessly.

He cocked a brow, "Unless you have any other ideas…"

"You're suggesting that we…date?" I closed my eyes and shook my head, trying to stifle a giggle, though I couldn't stop my amused grin from breaking through.

"Isn't that what two adults in our position would usually do?" Edward sounded a little offended that I was mocking his idea, but there was still an undercurrent of hesitance.

I opened my eyes and looked up at him, biting my lip to stop myself from laughing at his disgruntled expression, "When was the last time you dated, Edward?"

His grimace deepened in concentration and I chuckled under my breath. What the fuck was going on with my mood?

"I think it was Lisa Mitchell in tenth grade."

I laughed louder then, not even bothering to hide my amusement, and I saw Edward's lips curve up as well, "So you haven't been on a date in, what, 12 years? We're going to be so shit at this." And then I couldn't stop the fit of giggles that overcame me. I slapped a hand to mouth to try and quiet them, but it was in vain as the laughter poured out of me – a purge of joy and happiness after the days and weeks and months of sadness and anxiety. I just felt so…light. Free.

Edward just watched me with his eyebrows raised and a small, amused smile on his lips as I clutched my stomach to soothe the ache my laughter was causing. I tried to ground myself, realise that this was a serious moment and we were having a serious conversation, but every time the laughter would die down, I'd get an image in my head of a 13 year old girl with more dating experience than Edward and I combined and the laughter would come back with a vengeance. Edward's own shoulders began shaking in amusement and soon we were both standing there, in the cold night, in our pyjamas, laughing with each other.

I'd never felt more ridiculous in my life.

Which only made me laugh harder.

Eventually I calmed down, though I couldn't keep myself from beaming at Edward as I wiped a few stray tears from my eyes. His own smile was just as brilliant, and his eyes sparkled in the night, the green so visible even in the darkness.

"We should get some sleep," he said, still with that stupid huge smile on his face.

I nodded in agreement, taking a deep breath of cool air to calm myself even further.

Without hesitation, Edward took my small hand in his large, warm one, and led us back into the cabin. It wasn't far to the girls' room, and I mourned the loss of his warmth as soon as he released me.

I turned to him before opening the door. He was still smiling, and he stepped forward to tuck a stray hair behind my ear, and I felt fire where his fingers touched my skin.

"We'll just…" he whispered, "I don't really know what I'm doing."

"You think I do?" I whispered back.

"I don't really know how I'm supposed to answer that question."

I wanted to shove him into the wall.

His expression softened and he continued to play with my hair, "We'll just do what comes naturally. We'll do whatever we want to do."

I smiled back and nodded, "I like that plan."

000

Most of the squad was already in the dining hall the next morning for breakfast when I finally made my way there. Edward was devouring his too-yellow scrambled eggs, an empty seat next to him. He looked up as I walked in and I gave him a shy smile when his eyes met mine. He returned the smile when he finally swallowed, but then scowled when he saw me taking a seat next to Kate, and – after quickly looking around to see who was looking in his direction – stuck his tongue out. I scrunched my nose at him in response.

We were a pair of fucking three year olds. I loved it.

"All right," Marcus began a few minutes later when James dragged his feet in our direction, "a lot planned today. We have a trainer from the FBI. He'll be taking you through a training course and simulation activity. After lunch you'll be taking a short test," Kate groaned loudly at this, "on protocols and codes. Another training course in the afternoon and a talk on fitness. Short individual meeting with a psychologist, then we'll have dinner and head home after that. I want us to be out of here by 7:30."

"Do we get the day off tomorrow, boss?" Kate asked around a mouthful of bacon.

"You ask that question every year, Detective Hunter," Marcus said as he folding his schedule and reached behind him to retrieve something from his bag, "And for what must be the millionth time: No. I expect you at your desks at ready to work from 9am sharp tomorrow morning."

"You gotta give me credit for persistence. Or a few hours off, at least," Kate grumbled and went back to eating while Marcus just shook his head in amusement.

"What do we gotta speak to the shrink for?" James asked, a hard edge to his voice. Or maybe his voice was always that way. Or maybe I was just biased.

"It's just a quick assessment, James. To make sure you're psychologically stable and equipped for field work."

James' eyes narrowed, though he didn't argue. It made me wonder what he was worried the psychologist might uncover.

The day was a busy one, and so Edward and I didn't spend any time alone together. It was exhausting, and by the time it was my turn to meet with the psychologist I was ready for sleep. It didn't help that I'd gotten very little sleep last night until after the…talk with Edward.

I lazily made my way into the makeshift office. A skinny, older gentleman with completely white hair, Harry Potter-like glasses and a tweed suit stood to greet me. I shook his hand a stifled a groan. This guy had condescension and arrogance oozing from his every pore.

"Detective Swan, my name is Doctor Green. It's a pleasure to meet you," he said, though he didn't make eye contact with me for more than a nano-second – he was too busy openly studying my file.

"You, too," I answered with boredom before turning and taking a seat far away from the man's desk. He pulled his chair out and turned it in my direction so his back was to his desk, and sat down, legs crossed, file sitting in his lap.

"It says here you have a Masters in Forensic Psychology," he stated, still staring at the file in his lap. I wasn't sure if he wanted a response, but when he looked up and quirked a white brow at me I nodded in response.

"So you'll know how these things go," again, a comment, not a question. But I nodded again.

He shut the file, put it behind him, and then clasped his hands on his knee.

"How long have you been with the NYPD?"

"A couple of months," I responded. My voice was weak, so I quietly tried to clear my throat. This man was a shark; he could smell weakness from a mile away.

"And how have you found the adjustment?"

"Difficult at first," I replied honestly, "But my colleagues have been very welcoming."

He half turned in his chair to retrieve a notepad and pen, then turned back to me before jotting down a quick note.

"I understand you hadn't been doing a lot of field work at your last precinct." He spoke with his eyes on his notepad.

"That's correct." I tried to sound confident. I'm pretty sure I failed.

Dr Green raised his cool, grey eyes to mine, "Why is that?"

I took a deep breath. I'd done this a million times in Chicago. I knew how to deal with this. I just had to keep my voice even and detached.

"I'd just suffered a personal loss and decided it would be beneficial to ease my workload."

The Doctor began scribbling furiously in his book without taking his eyes off me. "What happened?"

My eyes narrowed infinitesimally and my voice hardened without my permission, "It was a personal loss."

His expression didn't change, still scrutinising and investigative, though his scribbling did give way to broad, lazy strokes.

"What has changed between then and now?"

"Time, mostly. I've had time to grieve and to process the loss. I've spoken to several psychologists and was cleared twice to be out on the field – once in Chicago and again upon my registration to the NYPD."

He hummed very quietly before continuing, "Tell me about any challenges you've faced since joining the NYPD." And I did a mental fist bump, because I knew the hardest part was over.

On the way back to the precinct Jasper, Edward, and I all sat on the backseat – like the cool kids in high school – with Jasper sitting in the middle. I was fiddling with my phone and pretending to text while also debating whether or not it would be rude to ask Jasper to move so I could sleep on Edward's shoulder again.

"So what did you and the shrink talk about? Neurotransmitters? Your mutual sexual attraction for all things brain shaped?" Edward asked from his side of the seat, throwing a teasing smirk my way.

I rolled my eyes, though the gesture was ruined by the smile on my face, "Of course not. We did our secret psychologist handshake and then sat in silence for thirty minutes, you fool."

Edward smacked his forehead and dramatically exclaimed, "How could I have been so wrong!"

"I expect nothing less from you."

Jasper looked at me suspiciously, and then turned his gaze quickly to Edward, and then brought his narrowed eyes back to me.

"What?" I asked defensively.

Jasper opened his mouth to speak, but then turned to face Edward again, before shaking his head vigorously and facing the front of the bus.

I caught Edward's eye, "What the fuck?" I mouthed.

Edward just shrugged in confusion and then lightly kicked Jasper to get his attention.
"What was that?" Edward asked.

Jasper just shook his head again, "I just decided that I don't want to know."

I was getting more confused by the second. I was kind of done with being confused. It was very annoying.

"Don't want to know what?" I asked.

Jasper kept his eyes forward and back straight. He looked like a soldier poised for battle. "What ever is happening between you two," he waved a finger back and forth between Edward and myself, "I don't want to know about it. I don't want to know what changed between Friday and today. I don't want to know why you're both flirting more than usual. I don't want know. Continue being flirtatious and I'm just going to sit here and ignore it."

"You're a strange one, Jasper," I said with amusement. I didn't particularly care if Jasper knew about whatever was going on between Edward and I. Hell, I didn't even know what was going on. I wasn't, however, particularly keen on Tanya and Kate knowing.

"Yeah," Edward agreed, leaning back in his seat, looking as relaxed and carefree as ever, "The rookie and I have always been like this."

I leaned past Jasper and flicked Edward on the nose, "We had a deal, asshole," I huffed, leaning back in my seat.

"Sorry Swan," Edward grinned.

"This is too weird," Jasper murmured. He was smiling, though, as he shook his head.

"Better get used to it, man," Edward said as he clapped Jasper on the shoulder, throwing a smile my way.

Yeah, I thought, smiling back, Get used to it. The thought made my heart warm, though it made my brain cringe with its cheesiness.

000

"Morning Angela," I called out as I walked into the precinct at a ridiculous time for a Monday morning.

"Hey," she smiled before glancing over at the clock, "You're here early," she remarked with both brows raised.

"Lots of work to catch up on," I explained with a grimace. Though I loved being a detective, I was beginning to miss the days behind the desk. I almost wished I hadn't passed the psych evaluation.

"Well, it's been a pretty slow night so hopefully you'll get some time to get back on track."

"Hopefully." I walked over to Angela and handed her the coffee I'd picked up from across the street. She gave me a grateful smile in return and gulped greedily at the liquid. I made a habit of speaking to her most mornings to get a general idea of how the coming day would go. "So nothing big last night?"

"Not really," she shuffled through the papers on the desk one handed, "One armed robbery, couple of assaults, but mostly petty theft. There was one missing person's report filed. I'd keep an eye out for that – she's been gone for weeks. She may pop up on your radar soon."

I sighed. "Mind if I take a quick look?"

Angela handed the report over without question before she went back to drinking her coffee. I quickly scanned the report.

Subject: Jessica Stanely

Description: Female, Caucasian, 21 years of age, 5' 1", 110 lbs, brown eyes, brown hair

Last seen: 16/11/15

Clothing and/or Jewelry: Unknown

Family: Unknown

Occupation: Student, Queens College

Address: Unit 2B, 15 Warren St, Flushing, NY

"Who filed the report? There's no contact information for anyone here." I asked, though I was distracted, because Warren St was ringing a bell with me for some reason.

"A neighbour reported it. Said she didn't really care but wasn't sure that anyone would report the girl missing," Angela replied.

I hummed distractedly and placed the report back on Angela's messy pile. Warren St, Warren St, Warren St…why is that name so familiar?

I made my way towards the hallway, only half paying attention to what I was doing and saying, "Well, I'm going to go tackle the mountain of reports on my desk now."

Angela groaned in sympathy, "Good luck."

I gave her one last smile before turning away. Warren St, Warren St, Warren St. This puzzle was going to bug me until I figured it out.

I heaved a deep sigh and made my way to my desk. I feared the desk was in danger of cracking under the weight of the case reports that sat in a neat but massive pile right in the centre. Had I really done this amount of work back in Chicago? I couldn't imagine it.

Maybe because you stayed back late and went in early every day because you had no life.

Not that I had much of a life now.

I settled into my desk and began making my way through the monotonous paperwork. While I didn't particularly enjoy the mindless work, it was comfortable and familiar and something I knew I was good at. But the monotony meant that I spent most of my time trying to remember why Warren St was significant.

Warren St, Warren St, Warren St on a loop in my head, like an annoying drumbeat.

The hours dragged but I eventually neared the bottom of my stack as the other detectives in the squad began piling in. Jasper ambled in with a large white box in his hand, reaching into it as he stopped by my desk and pulling out a blueberry muffin, which he placed at the corner of my desk before making his way to the break room. I smiled at his thoughtfulness and stuffed the muffin into my mouth as I typed one-handed.

"Damn, Swan," I heard as the clock was nearing 9 o'clock, "I thought you were more organised that this," Edward said, and I saw him thumbing through the pile of completed reports on my desk.

My hand smacked down on the top of the stack, "I'll have you know that's the completed sta-" I broke off as my eyes made their way up Edward's body.

"What?" Edward asked, confused. But I couldn't answer him; the words were stuck in my throat.

"What?" Edward asked again, his eyes nervous as he looked down at himself, where my eyes were roaming his figure. Edward wasn't in his normal outfit, which usually consisted of dark jeans and a leather jacket. No, today Edward was in a suit. A fucking suit. A modest suit, definitely, but a suit nonetheless. And I was completely unprepared for the sight.

The light grey slacks and matching suit jacket perfectly fit his figure, highlighting his broad shoulders, hinting at the muscles that hid underneath. God, even his thighs looked good. A crisp white shirt and skinny, light blue tie completed the ensemble, and I had to swallow several times to wet my suddenly dry mouth. He looked good. He looked delicious.

"What are you wearing?" The words came out a little outraged and scandalized. I needed an ice bucket or something to cool myself down.

Edward reached up to scratch the back of his neck, a scowl on his face and a slight pink on his cheeks. "If you're going to laugh, may as well get it out now," he grumbled.

I didn't laugh. I just swallowed again.

"I've got court this afternoon," he explained after a moment, dropping his hand from his neck to his tie, tugging at it nervously.

I quietly cleared my throat, "Are you worried about it or something?"

He huffed loudly, "No, I just hate wearing suits. I feel like I look like an idiot." He shifted uncomfortably and perched himself on the corner of my desk.

I turned back to my computer, though I could still see Edward from the corner of my eye. "You don't look like an idiot. You look…good." I attempted to keep my tone as lifeless as possible so he wouldn't be able to detect the fire that was burning in the pit of my stomach.

He was silent for a minute as I continued to work through my report.

Okay, I pretended to work through my report. I couldn't focus around Edward.

"Thanks," he finally said, his voice quiet and genuine.

I nodded in response.

"So what are you working on?" His voice was back to normal, light and confident.

"Reports," I sighed, rubbing my eyes, "I've been here for a couple of hours now and I'm still not done."

"Why are there so many?" He asked incredulously, once again reaching for my stack of files before I smacked his hand away.

"Because I have a lot of work. Leave me alone."

"I can't. Briefing."

I peered around Edward and sure enough saw the other detectives making their way to the briefing room. I grimaced as I stood, lightly pushing Edward off my desk and walking past him. He only chuckled in response and followed closely behind me.

I was a little shocked and honestly confused at how normal things seemed between us. No one spared us a second glance as we walked into the briefing room together, Edward taking his regular seat at the back and me sitting in the row in front of him. No one cared that we were joking around and annoying the shit out of each other, because that's what we always did.

I'd expecting this to change. I'd expected awkwardness and shyness and self-consciousness, but there was none of that. There was just Bella and Edward, just like always.

Until the moment in the middle of the briefing when Jasper started talking about some computer stuff I didn't understand when I remembered. I remembered.

Warren St, Warren St, Warren St.

The same place Bree lived. In fact, I had a feeling that if I looked at the address again, I'd find that Jessica and Bree had been living in the same building.

000

I tightly gripped my handgun in my right hand and a small torch in my left as I crept through the darkened hallway. The building was far more sinister at night than it was during the day. There were no windows to let in the moonlight or fresh air. The place smelled strongly of cigarette smoke and dust, a marginal step-up from the stench of urine and alcohol that permeated the streets outside.

I made my way quickly down the hallway to the final door on the right. I'd been here before, when I'd come to speak to the landlord. He'd allowed me to have a quick look around, but since I was posing as a friend of Bree's he hadn't let me stick around for long and stood watching me from the doorway the whole time.

Sticking the torch between my teeth and having a final quick glance down the hallway, I pocketed my handgun and took out my lock pick set, quickly getting to work. Charlie had been pissed when he'd found the set in my wallet one day until I told him that Emmett actually bought them for me. Apparently that's fine.

It took longer than it usually would to get the door open. I was hyper-aware of every sound around me as I kept adjusting the tools, trying to line up the pins, but it finally clicked into place and I was able to silently open the door and slip into the apartment, closing the door behind me.

My gun was back in my hand in an instant and my tools back in my pocket as I palmed the wall next to me, looking for a light switch. When I found it and flicked the switch, I was momentarily blinded by the bright fluorescents overhead, and I quickly blinked to adjust my vision.

The apartment wasn't the same as the last time I'd seen it. It had been a mess time – bowls had been left in the sink in the small kitchenette, a hamper full of clothes sat in the tiny living space, crumbs were on the sofa. But now…now everything had been cleaned and cleared away. There wasn't any crockery sitting out or clothing or dust or dirt or crumbs. Most of the furniture was gone, including the television and couch – just a single, plain black ottoman remained.

Keeping my back to the wall and my gun up in front of me I moved towards the bedroom. Trying to remain as silent as possible, I slowly turned the doorknob and carefully pushed the door open. The light was already on in the room, and standing in the centre of the room was a familiar young woman wielding a revolver and pointing it straight at me.

A/N: I was very nervous about this chapter. I sincerely hope it didn't disappoint.

Also, over 300 people are following this story? That's just insane to me. Thank you to each and every one of you - I adore you all.

Would love to hear your thoughts!