A/N: Hi everyone! I know the story says rated T but there is sexual content in some chapters. I hope you all enjoy.

Disclaimer: Richelle Mead owns everything!

"I've given up on you. Love fades, mine has." Dimitri said to me.

Uh, what?! Taking a calm breath, I looked him square in the eyes and told him "I don't even know why I bothered to bring you back." Dimitri flinched. It hurt me to say it, but I'm seething right now. "I risked everything for you and you treat me like I'm a pariah. Go fuck yourself." And with that I left the church.

My heart hurt so much, it felt as though it was ripped out with those words. I risked everything for him, and now he couldn't even look at me. I don't understand what I did wrong, I couldn't have done anything wrong...could I?

Running to my room trying to hold in the tears till I was behind closed doors. As I got up to my floor level I saw Abe walking towards the stairs.

"Rosemarie? What's wrong?" Abe said running to me, cupping my face, concern written all over his face.

"It's nothing." I said trying to wave it off. I just wanted to be alone.

"Kiz, you look like you're about to cry. Tell me what's wrong."

We got to my room, and the second I sat on the couch I couldn't hold my tears in any longer. I sobbed into Abe's shoulder, probably drenching his fancy shirt. He didn't say anything, he just held me and rubbed soothing circles into my back. It was comforting.

"He doesn't love me anymore." I said with my voice full of despair.

"Belikov?" He scoffed. "He's stupid, then. He doesn't know what he's missing out on." He held my face in his hands. "Rosemarie, don't let one boy, stupid one at that, make you feel any less of a person than you are. You're strong, smart and beautiful. There will be other men, it's not the end of the world." He wiped a tear from my cheek. Who would have thought Zmey would have a soft spot.

"That's the thing, he's THE ONE. And knowing that he doesn't love me and seeing him is going to feel like I'm ripping off the bandaid from my heart over and over again. It hurts so bad. I don't know what I'm going to do, I'll go insane."

"Come with me then." He said cheerfully.

"And do what? Break everyone's knees?"

He laughed at that. "You can do whatever you want. I just want you happy."

An hour later I was heading to Lissa's room. I just hope she would understand.

Knock knock

"Oh hey Rose, come in."

"Hey Liss."

"What's wrong?" She looked concerned and sat me down on her couch. I told her about Dimitri and the offer my dad told me. She looked shocked.

"I don't know Liss. This feels right. You know? I just want a little bit of space to think things through and get my things in order."

"How long are you going to be gone for?"

"I'm not sure. Not too long." I hoped not.

"I'll miss you Rose. Can't you work things out here? I don't want to lose you Rose." She grabbed my hand and gave it a tight squeeze.

"I don't think I can here Liss. I'll keep in touch, don't worry. It'll be like I was barely gone."

DPOV

I never really listened to the gospel spoken in church, it was just a way to wind down and forget my worries for a while. And now it was a way to prove that I was dhampir again. Strigoi could not step foot onto holy grounds, so this gave me leverage...hopefully. I was staring straight ahead when I felt a familiar presence next to me. Rose. Why couldn't she give me space. I needed to figure everything else out. I stayed quiet. Maybe she wouldn't talk.

We argued back and forth for a while, then before thinking things through, and just wanting her to leave me alone I made the biggest mistake of my life. "I've given up on you. Love fades, mine has." It took Rose a second to realize what I said, and me too.

"I don't even know why I bothered to bring you back." Ouch! "I risked everything for you and you treat me like I'm a pariah. Go fuck yourself." And with that she left.

What have I done? I watched her leave the church, not looking back at me. How am I going to fix this?

Walking back to my room I see Adrian in the lobby. He came walking to me, and he looked angry. Of course Rose told him what I said, they're dating. But why would he be angry about that? He should be happy. He stopped in front of me.

"You're such an asshole!" He huffed out and shoved me. It wasn't much of a shove, but shocked me nonetheless.

"You should be happy." I walked past him.

"How the hell can I be happy about this!" He followed me to the stairwell.

"I told Rose I didn't love her anymore." I said turning around to face him. "That will give you two time for each other." I started walking up the stairs.

"She left." Adrian said still not moving from where he was.

"What?" I turned around. Where could she have gone? "What do you mean left?" She can't leave, I haven't fixed what happened.

"She left with Abe half an hour ago. And no one knows when she will be back...if she ever does come back. All because you couldn't appreciate what she went through for you." He said almost yelling.

"You don't think I feel bad enough as it is?!" I walked down the steps and got face to face with him. Before I could say anything back he started yelling back at me.

"You should! You big idiot! Rose went to hell and back all because she loved you. She will never love me the way she loves you, and you are just tossing that away. She's forgiven you, why can't you forgive yourself. "

"You don't think I understand? I wish I could go back and never have been turned! I wish I could have stayed with Rose and helped her with her trials and seen her graduate and start a life together. But I can't take any of it back, no matter how much I want."

"You know what's hurt her the most?" He said looking at me, not giving me much time to answer. "That you crawled so far up Lissa's ass and claim her as your savior when all she did was stake you. Rose is the one that broke Victor out of Tarasov, helped find his brother and figured out everything to bring you back. And you couldn't even tell her 'thank you'. You ungrateful stupid son of a bitch." And with that Adrian walked out.

He was right. All I did was push Rose away. I wish I could have told her how I was feeling, and that I just needed my space. Why couldn't she just understand?! And now she's gone.