This takes place between chapters 1 and 2 of S. Walden's "Walking in the Dark". Hopefully it will explain a little about the sudden relationship that developed.

I don't wanna try to fight this love

How dangerous can it be?

I know the odds are so unfavorable

And honesty's forsakable

So many run for safety

Run from the

Danger of falling in love like this

Danger of falling apart

In the hands of another

- Danger, by Etro Anime

2025

Joe looked at the blonde man flopped on his couch, sighing deeply. He was glad Aiko knew to stay tucked away in his room this late at night, so he wouldn't have to listen to this same conversation again.

"Matt, you know you have to go home eventually."

Matt just shifted, still pretending to be asleep.

"You can't just stay here all night, Sora's going to get pissed at you, and then get pissed at me."

Matt snored loudly, trying to drown out the other man.

"Your kids will miss you if you stay here."

Matt cracked open one eye, finally acknowledging Joe, who was standing over him with his hands on his hips. "Look, I just... need to get out of there for the night. You know I can be real quiet when I need to be."

Joe resisted the urge to go and sit next to the blonde, not sure if he could control himself this late at night. "I don't know what's going on at your house, I won't even pretend to understand and if you don't want to tell me, I won't pry. But I do know that things won't get better by ignoring them."

"I'm not ignoring them, I'm just... taking a break."

Some break, more like a vacation... Joe thought with a frown. The other man had spent the night over at his apartment every other night for a few weeks now. They had been coming home from the bar, the only two who had showed that night, when they had reached the street where they usually parted ways. Matt, swaying just barely, had planted his stubborn feet on the sidewalk and refused to budge.

"No, I can't. Not anymore," he had slurred, glaring at the stop sign like it was the cause of all the world's evils.

"What's up?" Joe asked. He'd almost kept walking, turning back when he didn't hear that second set of footsteps. He watched as Matt put and hand to his face, shuddering into his own grasp with a sob. "Jeeze! Are you ok?!" He ran over, wanting to put a comforting arm around his shoulders, but remembering suddenly how violently he'd reacted as a child to touch.

"I can't go home, not anymore, not when Sora..." He made a heart-wrenching noise, almost collapsing, but refused to go on.

"H-Hey, why don't you, uh..." Joe hated to see the man he still loved this way. "Why don't you stay the night with me? I have a big apartment, so it's not like you'll be in the way or anything."

Matt had still been shaking, but he looked up with eyes so desperately empty, breathing softly, "You... you would do that for me?"

"Of course!" Joe hoped he hadn't sounded too desperate. "I-I mean, you're my friend, so, so why wouldn't I offer and you... you look like you need it right about now." He reached out, and was amazed when Matt took his hand in his own, following like a lost child.

It was a long walk, longer than to the blonde's apartment and Joe idly wished that the buses would run late into the night. But Matt had looked like he didn't want to be near anyone else right then, and that most likely included being trapped in a metal shuttle with the homeless and drunk. Not that either man was incredibly sober at that point, and Joe hoped that he wouldn't give into the feelings he'd been fighting back since he was a child. Matt needed a safe place to stay, and that was what Joe was going to provide, no matter what.

His complex was still bright at that time of night, morning by then, so he had no trouble leading the man to his door. He had tried not to think about the other times he'd brought home men, about all the things he'd still dreamed of doing with the more than slightly tipsy blonde staggering in through his doorway.

"I have a spare bedroom over there," Joe had told him. "There's a bunch of junk in there from when my brothers were still living with me, but the bed should be cleared off and the sheets should be clean."

"Thanks," Matt had said, so softly Joe had to strain to hear it. "I... I really appreciate it." He was still holding Joe's hand and the man blushed. Once again, the thoughts of all his other nightly partners flooded his mind and he jerked away before he could act on any of those thoughts. Not only was Matt his friend, he was married. Happily, sometimes, if two kids were anything to go by.

He'd given a nervous laugh, trying to act like he wasn't about to lose control of himself. "I-I'll try not to make too much noise in the morning, so good night."

The look on Matt's face was anything but disappointment, Joe was absolutely certain of that. So he'd shooed the man to the spare room and quietly slipped into his own, falling asleep before his head had hit the pillow.

The next morning, Joe was awoken by a frantic shaking, and a worried voice calling for him, "Dad? Dad, there's a man on the couch..."

Joe opened his eyes, cursing the alcohol, and forced himself to sit up. His son, a young boy almost his spitting image from when he was ten, was standing beside him, pouting.

"You should have told me you had a date, Dad," the boy had told him.

"No, Aiko, it wasn't a date," Joe assured, reaching for the aspirin next to his bed. His son, ever thoughtful, had already brought him a glass of water to take his medicine with.

Aiko gave him a look that clearly stated he didn't believe his father. Just like his mother, Nana, never had. "You don't normally bring dates home, what did you do? Did you already get broken up with?"

Joe choked on his drink, sputtering and blushing. Damned observant child. "I told you, no. He's just a friend that needed a place to stay the night." He held his head in his hands and groaned. "What time is it?"

"It's almost eight," Aiko told him, not bothering to be quiet. If his father was going to start bringing his dates home, he wasn't going to let a simple thing like a hangover get in the way of a Dr. Brad-style lecture. "You have to be at the hospital by noon."

How does this kid know my schedule better than me? Probably that damn "date planner" he bought me, Joe had thought, stretching and patting Aiko on the head. "Let me go talk to him, and then I'll hop in the shower. Why don't you get some breakfast, ok? I think we still have cornflakes."

Aiko had nodded, quietly slipping into the kitchen. The boy had been fully independent at the age of six, so Joe didn't have to worry too much about any messes he could make. Now, the ones Joe made...

Joe found his lazy pants, a pair of comfortable slacks he'd had forever, and pulled them on, wandering into the living room. He was worried about what would happen now. What would Matt remember? What would he say? Would he be too hungover to go home before Joe had to go to work?

The man was sprawled on the couch, breathing deeply without snoring, though he had shifted when Joe knealt next to him.

"Matt? Matt, wake up..." Joe wasn't sure if he should shake the man awake.

But he had groaned and opened his eyes, looking around in confusion. He licked his lips and blinked heavily, finally seeing Joe and smiling softly.

"Thanks, Joe. I... I really owe you." His voice was gravely, and Joe remembered the man chain smoking the night before. He bit back the lecture about his lung health to smile.

"Don't worry about it. Were you ok last night? If I'd known you would have preferred the couch, I could have made it a bit more comfortable for you."

"No, it's fine." He sat up, running a hand through his hair. Joe missed the length it had from back when they were in middle school. "Sorry, I usually get up and sleep in the living room after, uh..." He turned pink and looked away.

"You still have nightmares?" Joe asked, concerned. Were they the same ones from way back when?

"Sometimes," Matt admitted. "It makes it pretty hard to stay in a bed after, though."

Joe was glad he didn't have to worry about Aiko eavesdropping. The boy was polite enough to tune out any conversation he wasn't part of. He didn't want to have to explain to Aiko what kind of nightmares the blonde man had, and how they were different from his own.

"Do you feel better at least?" Matt had nodded, embarrassed and Joe had smiled. "Well, I have work in a few hours, and I know you need to get home. Just... Just know you're always welcome here, no matter what, ok?"

And by now, Joe was starting to regret those words. Now he had a beautiful blonde in his apartment overnight most nights, looking at him with a longing that he knew he was reading too much into. It was getting harder and harder to tell himself that they were just friends. Just good friends.

"All right," Joe sighed. "One more night here. And then either you work things out with your wife, or you tell me what's going on. Deal?"

Matt made a face, but nodded. "I'll take care of things."

Matt lay in Joe's bed, the old plush comforter pulled up around his shoulders. His head was cold from where they'd had to shave his hair away, and his stitches under the bandage itched, but the worst feeling was the odd heaviness where a metal plate was now replacing the part of skull he'd blown away. He wanted to reach up, to run his fingers over the wound again, but Joe had practically restrained the man until he was too tired to fight anymore.

"When you said you'd take care of things, I didn't think you meant this," Joe sighed, reaching around to fluff his pillows that were now being taken over.

"Why am I here?" Matt croaked, and Joe handed him a glass of water.

"Because my friends worked their asses off to keep you alive," Joe snapped. He was tired of Matt's metaphysical bullshit. "You're lucky you still have all your brain in there."

"No, I mean... What about Ken? And Sora, and..." He didn't want to repeat the words she'd screamed in his room. "Shouldn't I be under arrest?"

"Oh." Now Joe felt bad about his own assumptions. "Well, Ken was pretty busy trying to keep Sora in line, and he looked ready to arrest her too. He said he had his hands full and I volunteered to take you in while she calmed down. I don't think Natalie was too happy about that, but he told her he'd take care of it, whatever that means."

"What about Hana-chan and Tsuku-chan?" His voice cracked at his childrens' names.

"They're safe - Kari took them. She didn't want them to end up in foster care if Sora did go to jail. Look, part of letting you go with me was that I would call Ken when you woke up, so I'm going to go do that, ok? Just rest here for a bit."

Matt closed his eyes and nodded, feeling his skin pulling tight at his stitching. Joe patted him on the shoulder and closed the door behind him. Aiko was waiting in the living room, not eavesdropping, but listening to know when he could join in on what was happening.

"Dad?" he asked, watching his father pull out his cell phone. "Is Mr. Ishida going to be ok?"

"I hope so," Joe said softly, listening to the phone ring.

"Ichijouji here," came Ken's sharp voice suddenly.

"Hey, Ken, it's Joe." Obviously, Joe chastised himself. "I was calling to let you know Matt woke up. He's still kinda groggy, though."

"That's fine," Ken said professionally. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind when I speak with him." There was a rustling noise on the other end. "I'll be there in a few minutes."

The phone was hung up before Joe could say his goodbyes. Ken could be very serious when he was in uniform.

"Were you talking to Detective Ichijouji?" Aiko asked, not looking up from his untouched lunch. He didn't like any of this hospital stuff, especially when the police were involved. It was too much like five years ago...

"He's coming over to talk to Mr. Ishida," Joe told him. He took a deep breath and sat next to his son, hugging him tightly. "I promise, this won't end up like your mother. Everyone here is going to be just fine."

"That's what Mommy said and then she..." Aiko turned to hide a sniffle, and Joe pulled the boy close. No matter how old and independent he seemed normally, he was still twelve and needed what remained of his family. It didn't help that the man who had murdered his child's mother still hadn't been caught.

"I've told you before, Nana was needed elsewhere. The Gods knew you had me to come to, so you wouldn't be alone," Joe tried to comfort. He managed to keep himself from saying, 'They sent Matt, too, so I wouldn't be alone.' "Now eat your lunch, ok? I don't need you getting sick over all this like us adults."

Aiko nodded sadly, turning to his sandwich. It looked like he had to use every ounce of willpower to lift the thing, like it was filled with rocks instead of whatever lunchmeat Joe had laying around. Joe wished there was something more he could do for his son, but the only thing he knew was to keep him fed and a roof over his head and hopefully let him know he was loved.

There came a professional rapping on the front door and Joe looked up. He shouldn't have been surprised, the complex he lived in was fairly close to the police station. It was why his brothers had moved into it in the first place, and one reason he had agreed to live with them. Joe patted Aiko on the head and walked across the apartment, opening the door.

Ken stood in his uniform, the dark blue striking against his still pale skin, and the stern look on his face was nothing short of professional. Behind him stood his partner, Natalie Acevedo. She looked as though she could be his twin, the same dark hair and the same paleness. It was hard to believe she was fairly younger than Ken, but just as intelligent.

"Come in," Joe invited, stepping aside. "Matt's in my room."

The two officers took calculated steps into the apartment, Ken looking around with those eyes that missed nothing. Despite their friendship, Joe knew that if Ken found anything amiss, he wouldn't hesitate to do the right thing. He supposed that was why Cody had become a lawyer, they both had an enormous sense of justice left over from their adventures in the Digital World.

Aiko was passing by, taking his plate to the kitchen, when he gave a polite bow to Ken. He was used to the man, almost as tall as his father. He'd been the detective that had handled his mother's murder, as well as his father's investigation, and, every so often, he would come by to reassure the child that they weren't giving up on her. Natalie beamed at him, hurrying over and acting like he was the reason she'd come over. She was good with interviewing children, keeping them from feeling too pressured about what was tearing their world apart.

"I know you heard what Sora was saying back in the hospital," Ken said under his breath, smiling at the child. "Are you sure this is safe, with Aiko here?"

"I've known the man since he was ten," Joe said as Natalie and his son vanished into the apartment, her soft British accent filling the apartment as they spoke. "If I thought he was any danger to Aiko, I wouldn't have brought him here."

"I just don't want your friendship with him to blind you to the dangers," Ken told Joe with a simple seriousness. He'd seen too many times what could happen when people thought they knew each other.

"Well, even if he was, he's too weak to even go to the bathroom by himself right now." Joe turned and stalked to his room. He didn't appreciate Ken acting like Matt was capable of something like that, and he didn't appreciate the twinge of fear within himself that agreed.

Ken followed quietly, taking in the sights of Joe's apartment as though the whole world had changed right before his eyes. He was mentally cataloging everything, looking for anything that would be of use to prove one way or the other. He passed Natalie and she barely blinked at him, though they communicated just fine. Nothing was wrong with Aiko, aside his usual fear of what the police would tell him this time.

They reached Joe's room, and Ken stepped inside behind the blue haired man. Matt was, true to Joe's word, laying in the bed, eyes closed and breathing every breath like it was his last. He tried to crack open one eye at the sound of footsteps, but decided that hurt too much. He wished the hospital had sent him home with some damn painkillers.

"How are you feeling, Matt?" Joe asked. He walked over and couldn't help himself. He brushed back what remained of the blonde's bangs.

"'Bout as shitty as I did when you left," Matt croaked. "What happened?"

"Yamato," Ken said, stepping forward. He used their full names when he was in cop-mode. "I need to ask you a few questions pertaining to the accusations from the other day."

"I wouldn't expect any less," Matt tried to smile. It came out like a grimace. "Do you believe her too, Ken?"

"I'm not like other officers, I reserve my judgment until I get the facts." Though he tried to stay professional, a glimmer of worry shone in his eyes. "This attempt had nothing to do with being accused, did it?"

Matt sighed. "I always thought I'd done the right thing. I gave up my hopes and dreams in space for a family on Earth. I used every last bit of money I had to make sure my kids never wanted. I stayed in that mineshaft long after the canary died because I didn't want my children to blame themselves.

"When I realized that what I wasn't teaching my kids honor, but just filling them with poison, I knew I had to take care of it. I had to make it all right. And then, she started saying that she was going to tell everyone that I was hitting her, that I was t-touching Hana-chan, and that..." He swallowed hard and couldn't meet Joe's gaze. "That no one loved me, I just couldn't take it."

"Where did you get the gun? Sora told me she never knew you had it, and there is nothing registered in your name."

"It's... the same one from back then..."

Ken nodded as if that made sense to him. "That will, unfortunately, add to your charges. However, since you are unwell, you will have to wait to go before a judge. Until then, you will be required to say in your current residence, you will not be able to leave without an escort and without the knowledge of the police department."

"I don't think Sora will let me stay at her place," Matt said, amused. He already couldn't think of that apartment at his home.

"I told you," Joe spoke up. "I told the police you were staying here. This will be your current residence." Matt looked at him and Joe blushed. "Unless, of course, you don't want to stay here. I mean, I figured with a brain injury, who better than a brain surgeon to stay with? But, you know, we can put you up with your dad, or I'm sure we can find someone else to take you in."

"No, that's fine, I mean, I practically moved in a month ago." Matt lay back on the bed with a deep breath. "Do you need to say anything else, Ken?"

"Just..." Ken glanced around and lowered his voice. "Just don't be an idiot again, ok? We'll get everything sorted out, and whoever is lying will get what's coming to them." He squared his shoulders and returned to his professional coldness. "I'll be back in a few days to check on your condition to see if you are well enough to go to the station for questioning."

With that, Ken bowed and walked out of the apartment, Natalie following as though he'd called out to her. The door shut behind them and Joe knew they were talking about everything they'd encountered in those few minutes. He bit his lip and worried, hoping they'd said all the right things, hoping they'd made all the right motions.

"Joe?" Matt called weakly and the man jumped. "Is that why I'm here?"

"W-well, yeah, I suppose. We couldn't exactly get the judge to come see you in the hospital, and you were discharged. A bit too early for my liking, but I was outvoted, and -"

"No, I mean." Matt blushed. "You took me just in to keep an eye on my condition?"

"You're also my friend, Matt," Joe said honestly. "It just about killed me when I heard what you'd done. I knew things were bad at your house, and I feel like an idiot for ignoring them, and for telling you to just deal with it instead of trying to get you help."

Matt shrugged, closing his eyes in disappointment. "I wouldn't have taken it anyway. I'm getting tired, Joe, so let me sleep."

"Of course." Joe could feel the sinking in his chest. He'd said the wrong thing, again. He quietly stepped out of his room, closing the door behind him. But there was no way Matt would be asking him about that, and even if he was, it wouldn't mean anything. Joe told himself that Matt was just looking for someone to hold, no matter who. Just like he had long ago. And just like back then, he would end up cutting it all off as soon as he found something better.

And this time, Joe wouldn't let his heart be broken before it was fully mended.

"Are you ok, Dad?"Aiko asked as Joe collapsed on the couch. Despite his father's earlier reassurances, he was acting like he usually did after he got broken up with.

"I'll be fine." He looked at his son and frowned. All this was surely a strain on the young boy, and he kicked himself for making decisions without thinking about him first. "Aiko, how do you feel about this? About Mr. Ishida staying with us for a while? Because if you're uncomfortable, I'll find another place for him."

Aiko studied his father's face as intently as he was being searched. He'd barely lived with the man for five years, but his mother always brought him by when she worked overnights at her clinic. She'd told him that Joe was an old friend of hers, but he knew from the moment they met that this man was his father. He hadn't understood then why his mother acted like Joe was so unimportant, and even now he wasn't sure why he'd been left in the dark for so long. But that night, when he'd run to the man's apartment after his mother hadn't come home, Joe had promised to take care of him, to protect him from anything bad.

"You promised I would be safe," Aiko told him, reminding his father of that night. "And I continue to believe you. You even protected me from Tomaru, remember?"

Joe shuddered at the thought of his ex-turned-stalker, horrifyingly glad the man was dead by his own hand. "Just tell me if anything, I mean anything, makes you feel bad or uncomfortable, ok? None of that selfless junk you always pull on me."

"I will."

"Promise?"

"Promise." Aiko smiled suddenly. "I think Boy Meets World reruns are on the English channel, do you want to watch?"

Joe smiled, tousling his son's hair as the boy grabbed the remote. He still loved his guilty pleasure of foreign 90's TV that Matt had gotten him into when they were teenagers. Hopefully, when the man was feeling a bit better, he could join them on the couch and, for a while, Joe could pretend that they were a family. 'Not like that'll ever happen. I'll be lucky if he still talks to me after this mess.'

The episode was old, something about the two main boys and the mafia, and Joe worried that it would be inappropriate for Aiko. But the boy listened to the TV, reading the subtitles at the bottom, and Joe knew he would be quizzed on whatever random English words his son didn't understand. With something so ordinary and everyday filling his mind, Joe smiled and let himself relax, at least for the moment.

Matt was able to sit up and walk around the apartment after a few days, though any continuous movement was a strain and he often had to sit as a dizzy spell took over. His hands would shake randomly and violently, and whenever he tried to grab anything, he normally ended up knocking it over instead. Aiko was his usual polite self, offering to help whenever the man looked like he needed it while all the while bombarding him with questions. About his family, about his childhood, about his relationship with Joe, all the things his own therapist had asked him years ago. His father would chastise, tell him to leave the recovering man alone, but Matt would just laugh, when he didn't feel like puking from the world spinning around him, and answer with and much simplicity and honesty he would have with his own son, Tsukuyomi.

"I'm sorry my son is such a pest," Joe said pointedly one day over breakfast. Matt still wasn't well enough to cook, though he often volunteered. Said he felt useless just laying around all day, no matter how much Joe told him he needed rest still. "He means well."

"Aw, he's a great little buddy." Matt smiled at Aiko, and Joe squished the fantasy that the blonde felt the same way about their small family that he did. "Keeps my mind off, you know..."

"I don't know," Aiko said with a pout.

"And you'll know soon enough, ok?" Joe said. He wasn't sure, still, how to explain everything that was happening, but he knew he would have to find out quickly. "Now eat your toast."

The boy finished his meal with a smile that, on any other child, would have been a pout. As he stood to take his dishes to the sink, Matt said quietly, "You really should let him know what's going on. If I'd told TK sooner about everything, we wouldn't still be fighting."

"I know," Joe sighed. "But I just... don't know what Aiko should know. He's a child, and I don't want to expose him to any more of the evils of the world so soon. Besides, how much do you want him to know?"

Matt looked away. "He's not my kid, so it's not really up to me. But... I would appreciate if you didn't go into too much detail..."

Joe smiled. He wanted to reach across the table, to take the man's suddenly stilled hand in his own. He want to tell Matt that it was going to be ok, and tell him he was loved. It ached inside him to see the blonde so miserable, so down. But getting into a relationship now probably wasn't the best thing for either of them.

"I'll be sure to respect your privacy, then."

Matt smiled. He looked at Joe with a light blush. He looked like he wanted to say something, and Joe thought he knew what it would be.

Then there came a knock on the door and Matt jumped to his feet. He grabbed his chair to hold off the wave of dizziness when Joe stood as well. Whatever moment was going to occur was gone, and it was probably for the best.

Ken and Natalie once more stood in the hallway in full uniform, and Joe gave a polite bow.

"We're here to check up on Yamato's condition," Natalie said. "And bring him to the station."

"Come in," Joe told them. "And I'll go get him."

Natalie stepped inside, waiting by the door, but Ken followed Joe into the kitchen. Aiko ducked shyly behind Matt as the detective looked him over, and Matt just dropped his plate in the sink.

"Yamato, if you will come with us," Ken said, brushing the handcuffs at his hip. "I'd prefer not to do this in front of Aiko."

"I understand," Matt said. He smiled at the frightened child gripping the back of his shirt. "I gotta go, buddy, so you be good for your dad, ok?"

"I don't want you to go," Aiko pouted with the first defiance Matt had seen in him since they'd met. "Dad's happy when you're here, he doesn't just pretend, and I'm not... I'm not scared to be alone with you around..."

"I'll come back," Matt promised, worried about the unusual outburst. He knealt down to Aiko's level and gave him a squeeze. "I just gotta go with Ken for a bit."

Aiko just continued to frown as Matt stood, following the detective out of the apartment. Joe watched, making sure his son was still in the kitchen as Ken placed the handcuffs on the blonde man, while Natalie officially, and quietly, read him his charges.

"You're under arrest for domestic assault, sexual abuse of a child, child endangerment, and unlawful possession of a firearm."

He was willingly lead away as Ken continued to read his rights, and Joe listened to their voices disappear down the hall. He bit his lip and turned inside to do the one thing he knew he could do to help.

The phone was heavy in his hands and he worried that the person he was calling was too busy, patting Aiko on the top of the head reassuringly as the boy clung to him, crying softly into his side.

"Hey, Joe, what's up?"

"Hi, Layn, can I talk to Cody about something...?"

Matt stood in front of the judge in the small courtroom. The seats behind him were filled with people, mostly older men who had nothing better to do with their time, though there were several reporters there as well. He hadn't even realized what a fuss Sora had been kicking up about him, telling what she was calling "her side" to any tabloid paper she could find. That the once-leader of the most popular band in the early 2000's was a rapist, a child molester, and a wife beater. Apparently even credible newspapers were beginning to pick up on the buzz. His only comfort right then was the man standing next to him, sturdy and secure in his element.

"Cody Hida for the defense, your honor," the man said, and Matt knew he was in good hands. He'd been surprised when he'd shown up out of the blue at the police station, and even now he still wondered who had called him.

"How does your client plead?" asked the judge with an air of nonchalance.

"Not guilty."

"And," the judge looked at his notes, "Mrs. Gabriel Dolphinus, have the people set bail?"

The prosecutor, a young black haired woman with harsh brown eyes didn't even look over. Her crimson painted lips twisted as she said, "One hundred thousand yen, your honor." Obviously she'd had to be talked into the offer.

Cody spoke up, just as softly as when he was a child and with the same serious weight he'd always used. "We feel that bail is a bit excessive, your honor. Yamato is well known in his community, he has family in the surrounding area, and even owns a place of business. We do not believe he is a flight risk."

"That may be, Mr. Hida, but he is charged with rather serious crimes." He tapped the gavel, the noise echoing over the idle chatter that filled the room. "Bail is set at one hundred thousand yen."

"Next case, docket ending..."

Matt watched the bailiff approach him and put his hands obediently behind his back. Cody put a hand on his shoulder and Matt gave him a grateful smile.

"We'll get you taken care of," Cody promised and Matt nodded. The cuffs were cold on his shaking wrists, but he was used to them. He'd been arrested before, after all.

He sat in the back of the courthouse, watching the officer processing his paperwork. He was handcuffed to a chair, seated next to a young twitchy-looking boy, and looked around. Everything was so different from when he was a child, and he didn't want to admit that he was scared. He was scared of what would happen to his children without him, of what Sora was telling everyone. He was scared that she was right, and that the only reason Joe was keeping him around was pity.

He sighed, trying to settle himself against the bench, ignoring the boy next to him babbling something under his breath, when the officer at the desk laughed.

"Well, Mr. Famous," he said, undoing the cuffs around Matt's wrists. "You must have some fast friends. Your bail's already been posted."

'Already? Who do I know that has that much?' Matt thought as he shook the feeling back into his hands. He regathered his personal effects that had just been cataloged and was escorted to the courthouse steps. He looked around, a bit lost as to what to do now. He was certain Sora wouldn't let him back in her apartment, the kids were staying with his brother, and he couldn't think of any of his friends that would have the room to put him up.

"Hey, Matt!"

The blonde looked up, confused for a moment as to who would be calling for him, and saw Joe. He was standing by his car, smiling up at him.

"Joe, what are you doing here?" Matt asked as he approached.

"Well, Cody called and told me about your bail. And I'm not too far away from the courthouse, so I decided to come by and wait for you."

"Why would Cody call you?" Matt frowned. "And how did you know I'd be out soon? My bail was expensive as hell. Unless..."

The blue haired man blushed lightly, adjusting his glasses and looking away. "Well, I am a doctor, and it's not like my apartment costs a lot, and me and Aiko aren't ones to spend a lot on junk..."

"That was too much, Joe," Matt chastised. "I'll pay you back, I swear. Plus whatever Cody's fees are, because I know lawyers aren't cheap."

Joe shook his head and ushered Matt inside his car. "Cody said he would do this pro bono. He says that volunteer cases look good for lawyers, but I know he knows you're innocent."

Matt was quiet as Joe pulled into the street. Neither man had thought to ask the other if this was ok, just knowing that they needed each other.

"Do you?" Matt asked quietly as they waited in traffic.

"Do I what?" Joe resisted the urge to cuss at the other drivers. His terrible road rage wasn't something he wanted anyone to know about.

"Do you think I'm innocent?"

Joe glanced over as the blonde looked away, afraid again of what would be said. "Matt, I've known you forever. I know what happened to you and why you turned out the way you did. I know that you would never do anything to bring that pain to anyone else, much less your own children." He didn't think, just reached out and took the blonde's hand in his own like he would have when Aiko was worried. "I'll make sure that everything will be all right."

Matt didn't say anything more. He just calmly held Joe's hand all the way to the complex, only realizing he was doing so when they had to part to get out of the car.

Ken called the next day as Matt slept and Aiko was at his summer Beautification Club, pulling weeds at the school grounds.

"Don't tell Natalie, she's already mad at the special treatment I'm giving Matt," he said conspiratorially and Joe could hear his children in the background, Yolie yelling at them about something or the other. "But I've been talking with Cody about his case. We're going to try and put it off as long as possible, let some of the media hullabaloo that Sora's stirred up die down, that way when the jury sees him, his case isn't fresh in their minds. I would have preferred a change of venue, where we take the case outside the city, but our lawyer is determined to keep it here.

"What that means, however, is that Matt won't be able to leave the prefecture without notifying either me, or anyone at the station, or Cody. Due to the charges, he won't be allowed near his children, or parks or schools or any of that. I've talked to my A.D.A, Gabriel, the police station's attorney," he clarified, "and we're going to have someone come by and talk to Aiko officially. My boss doesn't like that Matt's staying there, but I think we can convince him if Aiko is fine.

"Kari and TK have put in for temporary custody of Hanako and Tsukuyomi, and Gabriel says that should be fine as they're family. We really prefer that they stay with them anyway, less poison towards them than staying with Sora's mother like she wanted.

"Look, Joe, I believe in Matt's innocence, and I know you do too. Hell, I can't think of anyone that would agree with Sora about what she's saying, but just... keep an eye out. Don't let yourself be blinded to what he could do."

"I will," Joe said softly, as though he didn't want to admit he had those same fears. As though just admitting them would outweigh the knowledge he held of Matt's own suffering. There was a sudden scream on the other end and he couldn't tell if it was a child or a wife yelling, and Joe laughed. "Yolie sounds like she has her hands full, why don't you go take care of them?"

"I'll speak with you soon, Joe," Ken promised as he hung up.

Joe turned away from his phone, trying to lose himself in mindless cleaning. He and Aiko were normally very neat, but the sudden invasion of another person and all the visits from the police were getting to them. There were still dishes sitting in the sink, dirty pots on the stove. He ran the water and sunk his hands into warm bubbles, trying not to think about those nights long ago in The Diner. Back when he still knew his friends, back when he had a purpose in his life, back when he thought he was loved.

He lowered his eyes, fighting back the memories, when there came a soft touch on his shoulder that made him jump and yelp.

"Sorry, man," Matt was laughing, wiping the bubbles from his shirt where Joe had flailed. "I thought you heard me calling for you."

"M-Matt!" The last person he wanted to see right now, and the first person he needed to see. "Are you ok? Did you need something?"

"Yeah, to move around. My ass was getting numb from laying around all day." Matt leaned against the counter, holding a shaking hand to the bandage that covered his stitches. He couldn't wait for them to come out. "Need any help?"

"I'm almost done," Joe told him, blushing. It had been a while since his last freak out over nothing. "I just need to wash the pots over there."

"I'll do it," Matt volunteered. Joe made a noise, but Matt just shooed him away. "I haven't done housework since I shot myself, and I'm going stir crazy only seeing your room."

"But it's my house," Joe protested weakly. He couldn't say no to Matt.

"Stop being so damn responsible for once in your life and go be lazy on the couch – I got this." Matt smiled at him, and Joe immediately left the kitchen, mumbling his thanks. He didn't need Matt to see how warm his cheeks got.

Once again, the sound of water running filled the kitchen as Joe flopped on the couch. He leaned back and sighed, throwing his arm over his face, glasses digging into the bridge of his nose. Now that the man was up and about, it was going to get harder to contain himself, he was sure.

"I..." Matt started, scrubbing away and cursing the twitching in his fingers. "Look, I really appreciate all of this. You didn't have to take me in, you know. I could have gone to live with my dad. Hell, I probably should have, or at least I need to call him once in a damn while."

"It's ok, Matt," Joe smiled weakly in the direction of the kitchen. "I keep telling you, you're my friend. I had the room, and I have the knowledge in case something goes wrong. It was obvious that I should let you stay with me."

The sound of the water stopped and Matt appeared in the doorway. He was drying his hands on his jeans and glaring at the man on the couch who was still relaxing into his arm. The blonde bit his lip and stilled his quivering hands. He didn't want to be the one to do this, but he knew Joe would never risk upsetting this delicate balance they forced upon themselves. But Matt was tired of balance and safety and the right thing, he'd wanted reality and all it's harshness for so long now.

He sat heavily next to the man, sinking into the familiar couch he'd spent so many nights on. Joe turned his head toward him, keeping his arm on his forehead. "Are you all right?"

"No," Matt admitted. "Look, Joe, about back then..."

"You said it yourself, you were attempting to do the right thing, no matter how stupid that was." Joe looked like he was going to sit up, to cut off this conversation before it could happen.

But Matt snatched him by the shoulder and dragged him back down. He wasn't going to live in this serene bubble and hide his true self away like Joe was so good at. "Not that. I mean, that night. When I graduated." He felt himself blushing and hated it. "I know I was drunk as hell, but I thought that, well, we had something between us."

"What are you talking about?" Joe asked, genuinely confused.

"I don't remember what I said, only what I think I said, and if I pissed you off, well, you shouldn't have to put up with me out of pity."

"You didn't say anything to me," Joe said and Matt blinked at him. "I gave you the jacket and then I left. Remember? I told you I had work, or school, or whatever?"

"N-no!" Matt insisted. "You stayed. You stayed and I told you that..." Joe frowned at him, a blank look in his eyes. "I swear that you were there..."

"I was at your party for all of an hour, you know that. I was the first one to leave and Tai made fun of me for a week for being a lightweight." Joe shifted and sat up straighter. "Did you talk to someone else?"

"I... I..." Matt closed his eyes against the foggy memories, trying to sort through them. He thought he'd replayed that night a million times in his mind, wondering what had ever happened to the other man he'd felt so strongly about. He'd confessed his feelings and his intentions and Joe had completely blown him off the next time they'd spoken, almost as though the conversation had never happened. But it had, he knew it had, with someone who...

Who smelled like flowers.

"Oh, fuck..." Matt buried his face in his hands, a miserable noise escaping him. He pressed into his palms, ignoring the pain from the plate in his skull as he dug his fingers into his stitching. "Fuck, I'm so stupid..."

"What's the matter?!" Joe yelped, prying the blonde's hands away from his injury. The last thing he needed was for that plate to come loose. "What happened?"

"It was Sora. Sora! God fucking damn, it was Sora!" Matt let Joe cling to his wrists as he laughed at his own idiocy. The blue haired man looked a little nervous, and Matt couldn't blame him. Even he was a little scared of the noise he was making.

"Matt, talk to me!" Joe was wondering if he needed to call an ambulance. Or at least his mother's psychiatrist. "What is it?"

"That night, I thought it was you. I thought I was telling you that I loved you! No wonder you never said anything! I thought you were just doing that polite shit to keep from letting me down."

"You love me?" Joe was red all the way to his ears.

Matt calmed his laughter, turning to Joe with an almost wildly desperate look in his eyes. "I wanted to tell you that night – I want to tell you now – that I love you, Joe. I've loved you since I was ten, I just never knew it until I was older."

"What about Sora?" Joe didn't want to believe, not just yet. "And Mimi? And, well, all of high school?"

Matt looked away, embarrassed. "I was scared. Everywhere I tried to look for love, it just blew up in my face. After I... attacked... Sora, and all those rumors started going around... I tried to make it work with one person – I swear I did. But he just made me out to be this wild sex freak and it was just easier to fall into that. Easier to believe I was just too messed up for anyone to want a real relationship with me.

"Why do you think I always came to you when I was a kid? You were always the one to make me feel like a human being, not some rock god or sex symbol. You were the only one who made me feel like I could be a person, That I could be Yamato Ishida, not just some name scrawled on the bathroom wall for a good time."

"You said since you were ten," Joe breathed, the loudest he could get his voice to sound. "That means... since The Diner..."

"Yes," Matt told him, glancing to his wrists, still held in Joe's hands, in shame. "Since those nights..."

"Then why?" Joe asked. He'd wanted that answer for the past twenty-six years. "Why did you never say anything to me?"

"I was embarrassed," Matt admitted. "Tai was there, and I knew he would just make fun of us – hell, he made fun of every Digimon we ever met, plus the rest of us kids – and I couldn't handle that. I'd already been made fun of too much in school just for the way I look and the things I did. And then you never said anything to anyone, and I figured you didn't want a relationship with someone so damaged, and I never pressed it." Matt pulled away, taking his hands away from those soft ones. "I guess, if you never said anything, then that's still true..."

"Matt, I told you back then," Joe smiled, vision blurring behind his glasses. He could feel the hot tears beginning to slide down his cheeks. "I told you I'd keep it a secret, and I wouldn't tell anyone unless you were ready. I've still never told anyone what happened between back us then because I didn't think it mattered to you."

Matt laughed, putting his hand on Joe's wet cheek. It was amazing how much Joe's presence stilled the uncontrollable quivering. He felt the other man reach out and wipe away the tears he didn't realize he was crying. They leaned in close together, forehead to forehead, nose to nose.

"What a couple of dumbasses we are, huh?" Matt said, softly. He didn't have to speak loudly now to reach the other man. "All this shit, all this dumb fucking shit, we could have avoided if I hadn't been so stupid..."

"You were scared," Joe reassured, tingling from the warm breath on his lips. He'd dreamed of this moment ever since he could remember. "I was scared."

"I'm still scared," Matt admitted. "But I'd rather push through that than be without you ever again."

Joe didn't say anything, just leaned forward and pressed against those lips he'd missed since he'd first fallen in love.