I couldn't stop thinking about this idea so I decided to write this story.
It's just a short one and probably the only Arrow one I'm ever going to write. =o)
Felicity stared at the plastic stick in her hand. She couldn't believe it was happening to her. If she had a plan this wouldn't be part of it for at least another five years. Maybe never.
She chewed on her bottom lip. She immediately started to wonder what Oliver's reaction to her news would be. They didn't plan to get pregnant. They didn't talk about having children. Hell, they didn't even talk about further future than the next day.
"Damn it!" she cursed. She wasn't sure what to do. She knew she should tell Oliver but she was afraid.
They just started their relationship and Felicity didn't think that the pregnancy news was going to be accepted with much appreciation. And she couldn't blame him. He was trying really hard to put his life together, to figure out who he was. The baby would just make it even harder for him and she didn't want that.
Few days later they were watching TV together. Felicity was lying with her head on his lap and Oliver stroked her hair in calming movements. Her phone beeped. He grabbed her phone from the small table next to the sofa and handed it to her. Felicity unlocked it and opened the message from Lyla which included a video of Sara.
"Oh, my Gosh! Look at that!" Felicity put her phone the way he could see it too.
Oliver smiled. "She's all grown up." He sounded touched.
Felicity chuckled. Lyla or John sent the pictures or videos of Sara regularly and his reaction was always the same. She found it funny. It also gave her a hope that he could want the child they were expecting and about which he didn't have an idea yet. Felicity typed an answer before looking up at him. "Do you want kids?" she asked.
Oliver shrugged. "Sure. Just not yet. It's not the right time." He smiled. "Do you?"
And just like that her hope's been taken away. "Yeah." Her voice sounded hoarse. She swallowed. "One day." Felicity forced a relaxed smile. She just couldn't bring herself to tell him after what he said.
He tilted his head and kissed her.
Felicity was close to tears. She wanted to scream, to tell him that the time was never right and that the one day will come sooner than any of them expected but she couldn't. She knew what she had to do and it made her uneasy because she didn't want to do that.
Felicity went to the living room in their house. She took out one of her books she never read and put an ultrasound picture in between the pages. She just came back from her appointment at the doctor. They gave her the picture even when she said that she wouldn't keep the baby. Both – the doctor and the nurse – gave her a sad look. The doctor asked her to think about it but made an appointment for abortion anyway.
Felicity then locked herself at the toilet and cried for almost half an hour before the receptionist came to ask if she's ok. She put a brave face on and left.
The memory of what happened just a little over hour ago made her nauseous so she made her way to their bathroom and spent some time over the toilet. She was thankful that Oliver wasn't home because he would ask questions she wasn't ready to answer. She was pretty sure she wouldn't be able to lie to him which would lead to him telling her that everything was going to be ok and then he would say he wanted the baby but he would do that for her sake and it was just wrong.
Once she felt like not throwing up anymore, Felicity stood up and washed her face. She put a hand on her belly, tears falling on her cheeks. "I'm sorry, baby, I'm so sorry. I just can't have you now. It's not the right time." She whispered, her voice broken.
Oliver knew something was wrong with Felicity, very wrong. It occurred to him two weeks ago but every time he asked her she said everything's alright and changed the subject. She probably thought she could get away with the lie but he always knew when somebody lied to him and she was aware of it. Her trying was another thing to confirm something wasn't quite right.
He was glad that Felicity wasn't home as it gave him the time to find out what was going on. He didn't know what he was looking for but he was sure that he would know when he would find it.
He started to look in their bedroom. In normal circumstances he would feel bad to look into her stuff but now wasn't time to let his conscience to take over. He was worried about her. After a few minutes he found a paper with address, today's date and time, hidden underneath her bras. He frowned. He knew the address. It was an address of the hospital. Oliver felt an icy fist around his heart. He didn't like the idea of Felicity being ill.
He went to the living room where he left his phone. He dialled Felicity's number but before he could press the call button he realized one of the books on the shelf wasn't properly in. He made his way to the bookshelf and pulled the book out. When he opened it, something fell out. He bent to pick it up. His breath got caught in his throat when he realized what he was looking at.
Felicity wasn't ill, she was pregnant. The knowledge hit him hard. Suddenly everything made sense - her not being herself lately, her constant tiredness, her not eating. He didn't have to be a genius to know what Felicity's plan had been. When he realized what she was about to do, he was out of their house in seconds. He knew he had to stop her.
For the last twenty minutes – the longest twenty minutes in her life – Felicity sat in the hospital's hallway, waiting for the nurse to come for her. She was praying for something – anything – to happen to change her mind – or Oliver's in that matter. She knew it wasn't possible, it wasn't the right time but she really wanted the time to be right. She didn't want to do it.
Felicity wiped off the tears on her cheeks. She was crying since closing the house's door behind her and couldn't stop. Some of the nurses gave her questioning looks; some of them asked if she was ok. Once again she put on her brave face and said everything was fine. She couldn't tell to complete strangers what was going on in her life. If she did and Oliver knew, he would jump out of his skin. Her memory of his reaction when she had to tell Barry who Oliver was because he was the only one who was able to save him was still vivid. Not that it was the same situation but it didn't matter.
The nurse called Felicity in and she stood up with a heavy heart. She was half way through when she heard familiar voice calling her name. She slowly turned around. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Oliver running in her direction.
Felicity turned to the nurse who was smiling kindly. "I'll give you a minute," and with that she disappeared in a consulting room.
"What are you doing here, Oliver?" asked Felicity before he could say anything.
He gave her a surprised look. "What am I doing here? The better question is what are you doing here?"
She didn't answer. She didn't know how to so she just looked at the floor.
"Felicity!"
She looked up but still didn't say a word.
Oliver touched her hand. "Why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.
Felicity shrugged. "I wanted to. I swear! But you said it wasn't the right time so I thought I'll save you the trouble of telling me to get rid of it." Her eyes were full of tears.
Oliver gasped. "Is that what you think? That I would want you to do that? Don't you know me?"
She swallowed. "I honestly don't know. I was just scared that you wouldn't want the baby or that you would want to do the right thing just for the sake of the baby. I didn't want you to make a decision you would regret for the rest of your life."
"It's our baby, Felicity. Our baby!" he exclaimed.
"I know! But you're trying so hard to find out who you really are that I didn't want to threaten that by telling you I'm pregnant. I didn't plan on getting pregnant and when I found out and you said it's not the right time I just freaked out."
"Felicity." He shook his head before leaning in and kissing her.
"I'm sorry," she apologized when their lips parted; tears on her cheeks.
"Hey, it's ok. It's ok."
Felicity knew Oliver was right. It was ok because he loved her and she loved him and no matter how unplanned or unexpected the pregnancy was they were going to love their baby.