Yes, I know that I'm an evil bastard because of the chapter title.

Okay, I've decided to take the time to explain each chapter title. If you like puns, this is going to be your dream come true. NFSW, but if you actually read Damn You Auto Correct!, I highly doubt you have a job in the first place, and are most likely a sexually frustrated idiot teenager who can't keep their mouth shut and has to apply acne cream to their face at least twice a day.

cough

Never mind. Moving on.

Dick Move - Barbara accidentally makes a wrong move, using "your" instead of "you" for Dick.

Thirty Seconds To Live - in this chapter, Barry says he'll be at Jaime's house in thirty seconds. He's so angry with him, he wants to kill him. Which only gives Jaime only thirty seconds to live.

Quick As Drake - Drake is a rapper, formerly an actor on the show "Degrassi". Not Tim Drake, mind you. Drake has a song called "0 too 100", in which, it includes the line "We go 0 too 100 nigga, real quick". Artemis, in the story, said she was going to be quick when she was going to take a shower/shit. Therefore, the title, "Quick as Drake".

BIG Problems - Roy has a problem with Dick. And he mentioned Notorious B.I.G, another who is also a rapper. Also "BIG" is wrote in all capitals, big letters. Get it? Haha.

Dick Fil' Gay - I'm not sure about my readers outside of 'murica, but here, we have this fast food chain called "Chick Fil' A". Chicken is mentioned in the chapter, along with Bart's creative coming out as a homosexual. And, well, if you don't know what "Dick Fil' Gay" implies, then you're too young to be reading these stories in the first place.

Daddy Bats - Often, Bruce Wayne is portrayed as very overprotective over his baby birds. Therefore, "Daddy Bats".

Friendly Fetishes - I came up with this title back in September and I still laugh when I look at it to this day. Basically, due to Bart's error, Wally believes that Bart was opening up to him about his sexual fetishes in a casual, laid back manner.

Popeing Off - I'm gonna be honest here. Not much thought went into this title. I just combined Dick's error (popeing instead of pooping) and Wally's activity (jacking himself off).

Quicker Than (Tim) Drake - Tim reacted very quickly when Roy said he was going to kiss Cassie.

Wally Buys Ramen and Texts - Okay. I'm kind of embarrassed about this one, but it's a reference to the Filthy Frank show. There's a video called "Pink Guy Cooks Ramen and Raps", and I just replaced a couple of words, and boom. There's your title.

Girl Talk - Artemis and Zatanna are girls talking about boobs. Need I say much more?

Home Movies - often times, porn is filmed with somebody setting a camera on a tripod and recording themselves doing a sexual act. Bart was looking through Jaime's car window, though Jaime thought he was looking through his bedroom window (which is in his home), watching him change, (And yes, Jaime should close his blinds, but have any of you ever seen Young Justice? He never does!) unintentionally giving Bart a free "movie showing".

Baby Wipes - Conner, as of 2016, is literally a six year old. That's where the word "Baby" comes in, and since he says, "She's wiping my ass!", "Wipes" comes in. Then you get "Baby Wipes".

ItwasautocorrectIswear - It wasn't.

Sitting In A Tree - Anybody who has experienced elementary school has probably heard "(insert name here), (insert name here), sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage!" when someone is being teased about having a crush. Since Dick was teasing Wally about having a crush on Artemis, the title fit.

Redtube Is Better Than Youtube - I swear to god I got like five messages asking me what Redtube was. If you're asking me what Redtube is, you either live underneath a Dwayne Johnson or you're too young to be reading Damn You Auto Correct!. (Honestly, I'm still waiting for a message from a soccer mom complaining about her child discovering porn through reading my stories. "I'm sorry Mrs. Shannon Smith, I didn't mean for Danny to miss his soccer practice because he was too traumatized discovering a hotkinkyjo video. Yes, you can speak to my manager.") Redtube is a porn site. Porn is mentioned in the title. I like Redtube. Okay? Got it? Great.

Fappy Hallowally - Fappy replaced the word "Happy". Fapping is slang for masturbation. "Wally" replaced the second half of "Halloween," that being the "ween". Hey, "ween" kind of makes sense now too. Also, for those of you who don't know what a blumpkin is, it's when a person gives another person a blowjob on the toilet. Nasty shit if you know what I mean. Anyways, Wally's mistake, "I got some blumpkins at the store today, for at half the normal price too!" makes him sound like he received a blumpkin from a prostitute, but she only charged him half of what she would charge normally.

k - Garfield says "k" in the chapter, and I didn't feel like coming up with a creative title.

Cancer Isn't A Joke, Guys, Wait, Never Mind - Often, people get very offended when cancer is taken in a joking matter. For some reason, idiots on the internet seem to think autism is a form of cancer. So I was making fun of SJWs who think I'm trying to make fun of autistic people/people with cancer, then realize I'm not talking about cancer in the first place.

AHAHAHA I'M NEVER GETTING LAID - let's be real here... it only speaks the truth. Unless one of you sexy fans want to volunteer to help me with that situation?

Magic Mike XXXXXXXL - Dicks dicks dicks all up in this chapter. Reference to Magic Mike XL, you know, the movie about male strippers. I bet Zatanna would make her dick super huge.

Gewgle - Since 2006, Google has owned Youtube. So I just wrote "Google" in a dumb form.

Young Blood - Artemis is a strong young lady. And she's bleeding.

Boiling Noodles - "Boiling" refers to Artemis's anger after she realized Wally spent a bunch of money on ramen (this chapter was a reference to Wally Buys Ramen and Texts), and "Noodles" refer to the ramen. Boil those noodles and you have some damn good ramen.

Gas Station - I've lived in the same stupid town for my entire life. We have this gas station near the highway and there is an Arby's connected to it. So whenever I think of Arby's, I think of gas stations.

Westboro Baptist Church - Okay, even if I wasn't an atheist or queer, I'd hate this church just as much. Even the Ku Klux Klan hate this church for crying out loud. They're annoying people who parade in the street holding up signs like "GOD HATES FAGS" and "PLANES CRASH. GOD LAUGHS." So the crazy religious lady Wally saw in the street was a member of the Westboro Baptist Church, preaching about how evolution is a lie and stuff like that, and creationism is real. Homosapiens are apart of evolution (obviously), so this crazy lady would not believe in them. Also, Westboro Baptist Church, Wally West. Get it? I just thought it had a nice ring to it.

Hipsters and Killers - To be honest, I couldn't come up with anything else. And honestly, hipsters/killers are two in the same. Hipsters kill fun.

BirdSlash - BirdFlash is Dick and Wally's ship name. And since "slash" refers to a ship involving two males, it kind of just fit.

ocat hsif - "fish taco" backwards, which is slang for "smelly vagina". Since whores and fish are mentioned in the chapter, that's where it came from.

So yes. I have wasted the past five months of my life writing these 70-word crap pieces when I could have been a productive member of society. There's your conclusion.

What was your favorite title? Let me know with a review/comment.

check out my mixtape on soundcloud btw its fire