AN: ok, i got nothin to say so i'ma write this chapter.

ENJOY!

Chapter 11:

Hiro and aunt cass fell asleep hugging eachother on the couch. hiro woke up with his face buried in his aunts shirt.. he sat up and rubbed his eyes, the motion waking up his aunt.

"Morning, Hiro."

hiro just grunted in response.

"Sleep okay?"

"Mh-hm." hiro finally took his hands out of is eye sockets, "Am i allowed to take a shower, or do i have to smell like an ape all day?" aunt cass thought for a second, "Oh, come on! that was a joke! come on, i stink!"

aunt cass sighed, "Fine, 10 minutes."

"Woah. that's crossing the line. you know it takes me at least 20."

"Hiro. 10 minutes then i'm coming in to make sure you're okay."

"would it kill you to trust me JUST ONCE?!"

"No, but it might kill you!" hiro was silent for a moment, "I'm sorry. i didn't mean for it to come out like that."

"That's bullshit."

"What?"

"You don't even know the meaning of sorry. you don't know what it's like to be sorry. you don't know. you don't know anything."

"Hiro-"

"You don't know the things I've done. you don't know the things i'm sorry for. you have no idea what it feels like to be sorry." hiro was practically enraged at this point.

"Then what does it feel like to be sorry?" aunt cass retorted.

"Complete and utter guilt that eats away at you for the rest of your life. i's a feeling that makes you wish you were dead!"

"What did you do that's so bad?"

"I KILLED MY BROTHER!" hiro screamed.

aunt cass had WTF written all over her face, "Woah, woah, woah. wait a minute."

"HE'S DEAD BECAUSE OF ME! IT'S ALL MY FAULT!"

"Hiro, tadashi's death was not your fault. why are you blaming yourself?!" hiro collapsed against the side f the couch crying.

"It's all my fault. it's all my fault. it's all my fault..." he cried. aunt cass went to hug him but he shoved her away.

"Get away from me! quit pretending you'll forgive me! quit pretending you love me! i'm sick of it! i'm sick of everything! i can't do this anymore!"

"Hiro. Hiro, look at me." hiro refused to look at her so she just kept talking, "Just take a few deep breaths and tell me why you think it's your fault. just tell me. i want to understand."

"You will NEVER understand."

"That's okay just tell me. please?"

hiro didn't say anything. aunt cass was about to say something else but then he started talking.

"After we said we'd catch up, we were looking out over the city."

"Ok."

"He told me he was proud of me and all that and we were talking and stuff and-"

"Keep going."

"The fire alarms started going off. we went to go see what was going on. someone came out and said Professor Callaghan was still inside." hiro tried to keep talking but he could find his voice. he started breathing really fast.

"Hiro, it's okay. take a deep breath." hiro took a deep shaky breath and continued.

"He- He ran towards the building. I- grabbed his arm and tried to stop him." aunt cass put a hand on his shoulder, "He said, 'someone has to help'."

"Okay, what happened next?"

"He- He R-ran inside. his hat flew off. i picked it up. i was about to go after him but-" hiro started hyperventilating.

"Hiro! Hiro, calm down, okay? it's okay. it's alright. just calm down. take a deep breath, hiro." aunt cass said as she cupped the side of his face, trying to calm him down.

"The building exploded..." hiro sobbed. aunt cass hugged him. hiro took a few seconds to calm down.

"Okay, what part of that was your fault?" she asked cautiously.

"If- if i had stopped him. if i had held him back just a little longer. he would be okay. everything would be okay."

"See? there's the problem."

"What?"

"All of those sentences had 'if' and 'would' in them. you're focusing on what could've happened instead of accepting what has happened."

"it's what would've-what should've happened if-"

Hiro, you did it again! all those words: would, could, should, if. they're all bound to make you miserable. instead, you should be focusing on: will, can, and when. you're living in the past, hiro. it' not good for you." she paused for a moment, "Hiro, you didn't kill your brother."

"Then who did? was it his fault for going inside?"

"It wasn't anyone's fault. it was an accident. no one wanted him to die. he was just trying to do the right thing. it's not you fault. just because you were there and you COULD'VE stopped him, but didn't, doesn't mean you killed him. the fire killed tadashi. not you."

"No, the fire didn't kill tadashi. the person who started the fire did." hiro concluded.

"and we're never gonna know who that was. all the evidence is in ashes."

"So was my brother." hiro seethed.

"and it's too late to change that. there's nothing we can do about that now. we just have to accept it. i know it's hard and it takes time, but you have to accept what's happened and move on."

"I can't"

"Yes, you can, hiro."

"How?"

"Just stop living in the past. forgive and forget. you're alive. live your life now instead of trying to relive what could've happened. instead, think about your future. what do you want to do with your life?"

"I want to end it.'

"No, that's what you want to do to your life. what do you want to do with your life?" hiro thought for a bit.

"I want to be happy."

"see? that's it!"

"But i can't be happy without tadashi."

"Hiro."

"what?"

"Does being around me not make you happy?"

"well, ya but-"

aunt cass smirked. hiro sighed.

"Can i take a sower now?"

"10 minutes."

"FINE." hiro seethed.

with that, hiro went up stair to take a shower.