Warnings: Major Season 4 spoilers. Angst and drama galore.

Oh my Lord, this is long. O_O

門前の小僧習わぬ経を読む: A boy near a temple will recite the scriptures untaught

Casey ran a hand through his wild black hair, slumped on the floor, arms propped on his knees, while he waited. He had lost track of time since his and April's hair-raising escape from the Foot, and everything else that happened after that had all but sapped what little strength he had left.

"You look like shit."

Casey suppressed a yawn, his dark, baggy eyes shifting to the tortoise across him. "Tell me something I don't know, Slash."

Slash grunted, clearly not amused. "You should just turn in, kid. It doesn't take a lot of folks to wait. The other human had the right idea."

"Only because I promised her, I'd stay." That, and he may or may not have convinced someone to slip a little something on her drink. April will scream his ears off for it later, but between them, Casey knew she needed the rest more. Her terrible shaking, the haunted look in her eyes, and the tears were images he wouldn't forget anytime soon.

"I killed them, Casey! They—they were human, and I heard them screaming and it burns, it smells and it burns, and I killed them. I killed them—!"

"Well, dude, if you're gonna stay," Something cold hit Casey's cheek, and he looked up to Mondo holding out a can of soda. "Then at least have some sugar. Or you'll end up sleeping on your feet."

The teen hesitated before taking the offered drink. "Thanks, Mondo."

"This one swell pad though, man." Mondo turned his head. "Like totally out of Star Trek or Battlestar Galactica!"

Slash rolled his eyes. "It's a space ship, Mondo."

"And man, who woulda thought that they actually came back," Mondo continued. "Here from the galaxy far, far away to help us out, that's super! Like real live outer space superheroes, man, like Han Solo! I totally dig!" The reptile mutant coughed. "Uh, who are they again?"

Casey snorted in amusement. "Fugitoid and Bishop, and yeah, it was a huge surprise for all of us. Never would have guessed that they're the ones Mikey kept referring to as his contacts."

Last any of them had ever seen the two was months after the Triceraton debacle. Just when everyone had thought the cyborg dead after his sacrifice to destroy the Heart of Darkness and the Triceraton fleet, Bishop showed up with the newly restored Fugitoid in tow, the former having recovered the robot's head and rebuilt its body from scratch. The pair the left after their brief reunion to help rebuild the Utrom homeworld and while they did promise to keep in touch, messages were few and far in between because of being in space complications.

Naturally, the human boy had literally jumped a foot in the air when he first saw Bishop and Fugitoid (or Professor Honeycutt, Casey supposed,) at the park. And according to Rockwell, most of the Mutanimals' reactions weren't far off either.

"Michelangelo sent me a message some time ago, briefing me on everything that has transpired so far." Fugitoid had explained to them. "He was asking for our help on studying the new brainworms—dastardly abysmal abominations, that they are—and how they can be safely removed. But after hearing what happened to the other turtles, of course we had to come back! It sounds like you will need all the help you can get."

Got that one right. Casey thought with an agitated sigh. First Leo, Raph and Donnie; then the Lair; and now…

"Help him, I'm begging you." The sound of crushing dirt under a heavy thud. "Onegai, Fugitoid, Papa wa…Papa wo…tasukete kudasai…"

It was an image out of a nightmare: the sight of Mikey, ambling towards them, an unmoving Splinter on his back, trailing crimson drops on the grass. Casey felt like crying when he saw his little brother's skin littered with cuts of varying lengths and depths, his arms and legs discolored by burns (especially in the legs), and his face wet with a sloppy mix of blood and tears.

A very good thing that Fugitoid and Bishop had their wits about them, quickly directing the Mutanimals to take both Hamatos into the ship, because for a good minute, Casey stood stark still, numbed by disbelief. April, on the other hand, became so distraught that she actually snapped, much so that Rockwell had to keep her away from damaging the Ulixes with her powers. It took Pigeon Pete shaking his arm to get Casey out of his shock, and him and Rockwell working to calm April's telekinetically charged hysterics into angry sobs.

After the hell of a month they've been having, Casey honestly couldn't blame her. He wished he could vent the very same way, in fact, yet he didn't rage and curse everything on sight like he normally would when he was pissed.

Casey was just so fucking damn tired.

WHOOSH!

The teen jumped to his feet when the door to the medical bay parted before Bishop and Leatherhead, but Slash beat him to asking first.

"Well, how are they?"

Bishop adjusted his shades. "The damage on Michelangelo's shell extended to some parts of his spine. He also has several second degree burns to his limbs and the back of his head, in addition to the lacerations and some hairline fractures here and there. Thankfully, it was nothing our equipment cannot manage. However, he has to stay out of commission for at least two weeks in order to heal properly."

Casey bit his lip a bit before whispering, "A—and Master Splinter?" A low rumble escaped Leatherhead's throat, making the human's heart sink. "Leatherhead?"

"He is…" The alligator took a breath. "We managed to clean and close his wounds, which are far less than what Michelangelo has. The problem is that some of the injuries hit vital organs. And he lost a lot of blood on the way here. Fugitoid had to place him in a medical coma…because…"

Bishop placed a hand on Leatherhead's shaking shoulders when the mutant covered a hand on his eyes. "Splinter's heart could not take the stress of his injuries. Truth be told, we nearly lost him twice."

Casey would have fallen to the ground if not for Mondo's quick save. "Oh my God…"

"B—But you said 'nearly,' so that must mean you managed to save him, right? He's gonna be OK?" But the crack in Mondo's ever optimistic voice told everyone that even he didn't entirely believe his own words.

"A medical coma is something of a last resort," The robot-piloting alien answered. "Normally, given what we have and what we can tell of Splinter's condition, we would have been able to keep him stable enough until his body recovers. Yet, for some reason, it is as if his organs lack…energy. His heart, for example, cannot maintain a healthy heart rate for a prolonged period. His lungs too, in terms of breathing."

Slash scowled. "Get to the point, Utrom."

"We put him in a medical coma to reduce the stress on his body so that whatever energy he does have left can focus on healing," finished Bishop. "Getting past that, however, is up to Master Splinter."

"Can we," Casey coughed. "Can we see them?"

"Later in the afternoon, perhaps." Leatherhead said with a tired sigh. "For now, let us give them time to rest."

"You all need to." Bishop intoned bluntly. "There is plenty of room on this ship. Get as much sleep as you can."

"But—"

"The Ulixes' camouflage cloak will suffice in keeping us under the radar for now." Bishop waved Casey's protest away. "And if anything comes up, Zayton and I will be able to handle it. You will be worse than useless the way you are now, so please heed my word on this. I will let your friends standing guard—Grunge and Peter—know."

"Come on, you, the Utrom's got a point." Slash turned to Casey after Bishop walked off. "Now you ain't got a choice but to get some shut eye, or else I'll haul you to the bed myself!"

Try as the teen might, though, he couldn't form the words to retort, his mind still reeling from the words Bishop left them with.

Splinter could have died. Splinter did die. Splinter could still die. It felt like his entire body was doused with a bucket of ice as the implications caught up with him. Oh God, what do we do now?

"Hey, hey, Casey, my man…"

How can we do this without Master Splinter? The voices around the boy sounded so far away, and he did not have the strength to go after them. He couldn't even find the strength to breathe.

"Casey!"

He was just so damn tired. His lungs were wheezing.

He just wanted everything to be one big nightmare. His eyes were burning.

He just wanted to be back home. In the Lair. His legs were wobbly.

With all of his second family in the Pit, laughing, teasing and playing and safe.

Grumbling at Casey because he took too long to wake up.

"KID!"

How could things get so fucking bad, was Casey's last thought before everything went black.

"Your speed is improving, Casey. Well done."

"WOAH! Master Splinter!" Casey let out a yelp—no, not a scream; what was he, a girl?—when he saw the rat mutant ninja emerge from one of the tunnels in an intersection not too far from the Lair. "Damn, you almost scared the hell out of me!"

Splinter smirked. "Almost?"

"Yeah, almost." Casey nodded firmly, replacing his hockey stick on his back. "So what are you doing out here?"

"Looking for you, in fact. I did not see you back in the Lair with the others."

Oh. Casey rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "I didn't think it would be a big deal. Just wanted to practice on my own a bit. Sorry I didn't say anything."

The older mutant stroked his beard thoughtfully. "Is something the matter?"

"What? No, of course not." Casey shook his head quickly. "Why'd you think that?"

"Your recent actions hinted as much, and your form earlier confirmed it." Splinter said. "Something is bothering you, Casey. Does it have anything to do with our current situation?"

A cold sweat dripped down Casey's back. "No, seriously, Master Splinter, nothing's wrong! I mean, there is, because the thing with the Foot and the other turtles and the Kraang, but that's all really! I want to help you guys as much as I can, so it's not a problem!"

The burgundy eyes studying his face made the vigilante's nerves twitch by the second, and it was his huge respect for the turtles and the man they called Sensei that held his usually sharp tongue back. Because really, there wasn't anything wrong. Why should there be?

Sure, his father raised hell over him not spending much time at home and he got some colorful spots on his trunk for his so-called defiance. Sure, his mother couldn't have made it any more obvious that she still thinks he is "his father's son" the last time he saw her ages ago. Sure, his little sister spent five minutes crying over the phone to him because "Mama doesn't want us to come see you and Daddy again," and he had to tell her to not worry and that they'll be seeing each other again real soon (even though it's been six months and his jackass of an old man doesn't even care and he misses his sister more than he can tell her or she'll start crying again).

It's not like he's doing this because he wants an excuse to not be around his miserable drunk of a father, or because the Lair is becoming more and more like home than that ratty apartment. The Hamatos consider him a friend, they take him seriously enough to let him fight alongside them and it was enough. Even though he'll never be truly a part of their family the way April was (because he obviously wasn't skilled enough to be even considered a shinobi trainee), that's OK. Really. It is.

"I never told you, why I never initiated you into shinobi training."

What? Casey's eyes went to Splinter's face, but the rat was looking at something far away.

"You are so much like my Raphael: headstrong, determined, courageous, if not too reckless. And yet, I also see in you, a little of myself."

"…Are you serious?"

"Just between you and me, among my sons, I was like Raphael the most in my youth, which is why I am usually the strictest with him. He is the one most prone to defy authority and to stand by his beliefs to the point that they could lead him astray, or blind him from the truth. The same way it had blinded me." Splinter sighed. "The Hamato clan is dear to my heart, but sometimes I wonder how it would have been, if I had not been a ninja. If I was not bound to my duties, to fight…perhaps I could have lived in peace in Japan, with Tang Shen and Miwa."

Casey had to look away from the wistful longing clear in the rat ninja's eyes.

"Nevertheless, my path is set, and while it has been built of hardship, the happiness I have found from it," Splinter's eyes caught Casey's. "The children I have come to cherish, I will not trade them for the world."

"Master Splinter…"

"There are many ways to fight. The path of a shinobi is not the only one, nor is it cut above all else. You are strong, spirited and capable. You have the freedom to be that warrior you wish to be. Do not think that being a shinobi is the only way to be it." The man turned rat placed a hand on Casey's shoulder. "Do not think that you are not one of the Hamato clan because you are not shinobi."

He hated how his shoulder gradually began to shake, how his hands balled into trembling fists and how his vision steadily grew blurry.

"Take the warrior's path you wish for yourself, the one you can build with your own hands," Splinter said gently. "Just always remember that you have a place—a family— here, if you need help in finding the way."

Casey dipped his head, pretending not to feel the warm trailing down his cheeks that he hastily wiped away. But despite them, he couldn't help the smile that threatened to split his face permanently.

"Y—You know, I always thought my foot work still feels rather sloppy compared to the turtles. Do you mind if you can give me a few pointers? That way, I won't lose so badly to Raph the next time we spar?"

Splinter smiled serenely. "Of course, Casey."

"…Thanks, sensei."

April was the first one Casey sees when he comes to again.

"Hey." She greets tiredly, a small smile on her face and a hand on his arm.

Casey groaned as he slowly sat up from the bed. "Red? What happened? What are you doing—?" He blinked again when he realized that he didn't even know where here was. "Where are we?"

"You don't remember? Mondo said you passed out near the medical bay and Slash brought you here. Your old room on the Ulixes?"

The memories of Bishop and Leatherhead coming out of said bay made Casey clutch the sheets tightly as his headache came back with a vengeance. "What time is it?"

"A little past three. You slept all morning. How are you feeling?"

"I'd like to say better, but we both know that's a load of bull." The black-haired boy breathed in. "Sorry, shouldn't have said that."

"It's fine. I'm glad you're being honest with me," said April. "I'm not feeling very well either, but at least I don't feel like blowing up the whole ship." A pause. "About last time…"

"It's fine, Red. You were pretty stressed out." Casey shrugged. "We both were. I get it. It didn't take too long for me to lose my shit either. You heard about Mike and Master Splinter?"

The red head nodded, biting her lip as her eyes turned glassy with tears. "I still can't believe it. There's still a part of me still wishing that all of this is just one huge nightmare that I just want to end. But seeing them like that…I know I can't keep thinking that. Not when Mikey will need us now more than ever."

"You've seen them already? How are they?"

"Master Splinter's still under medical coma. They kept him in this pod connected to tubes to keep him stable, an outer space version of life support or something like that. It's easy to fool yourself into thinking that he's just sleeping," April shook her head. "But Mikey, I was there when he woke up. Bishop said he's hurt his shell really bad so he had to sleep on his stomach, and his arms and legs were wrapped up because of his burns. He looked so small and in so much pain that I wanted to hug him but I couldn't because of the perimeter field. And he just kept asking about Master Splinter…"

"Did anyone tell him?"

"Fugitoid did. Somebody had to." April choked. "And, oh Casey, it was horrible! He kept shouting that it wasn't true, that we were all lying to him, that he had to go and see Master Splinter. He tried so hard to stand even when his arms and legs could hardly keep him up. Fugitoid had to sedate him again. And all the while he kept screaming for Sensei. For his dad. And his brothers." She covered her face with her hands. "And I was just sitting there and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't even hold his hand! I know that it's for his own good but goddamnit, I've never felt so useless and I just want to scream and kill the Shredder for what he did to us! For what he did to our family!"

Casey wordlessly pulled April into a hug while she sobbed into his shoulder while letting his own tears go for once. He and April may have won their own fight against the Foot, but the way things are now, it didn't feel anything like a victory.

What are we going to do now without Splinter? Casey asked himself again. The man had been everyone's guidance and wisdom, the caution to their will to fight, the stability to their course of action. Without him, Casey felt so lost and unsure, making him doubt if they really can win this war against the Foot when their losses were hitting closer and closer to home.

But we can't give up. The vigilante's eyes hardened. Not over this. Splinter wouldn't have wanted it. Besides, it's not like the Foot's won yet. We still have hope. We still have each other.

"Think you can help me up, Red?" Casey pulled away with a determined look on his face. "I want to go see them."

We still have Mikey.

HOTWOBREAK

"April?"

The psychic kunoichi looked up from her hands clasped on her lap to the hazy baby blue eyes looking up at her. "Mikey?"

The little turtle attempted a small grin. "Hey there, dudette."

April was overcome by the urge to hug him, but reminded herself of the perimeter forcefield around Mikey meant to minimize his risk for infection. And seeing the swathe after swathe of bandages wrapped around his arms, legs, shell and even his face, it was easy to see why it was necessary.

"Ah, Michelangelo! Good, you're finally awake!"

"F—Fugitoid?" Mikey tried to tilt his head, but because of his prone position, he could barely meet the professor robot's neon eyes.

"Please take it easy, Michelangelo." Fugitoid said warmly while typing some things into the computer on the wall next to Mikey's bed that controlled the barrier. "We may have treated the worst of your injuries but you shouldn't move around too much yet or it will be bad for your spine."

"My spine?"

Fugitoid nodded. "Your shell was badly damaged by what looked like an explosive force, and you have burns on almost every inch of you. My guess is that you were hit by some sort of bomb on the way to the park, yes?"

"Bomb…how did I…?"

April tensed when she saw Mikey's eye ridges furrow. "Professor, maybe we shouldn't—"

"Ah! I remember! The Foot! We were cornered by the storm drain! Sensei and I managed to escape, but Tiger Claw shot Sensei. Then Razhar threw some exploding shuriken at us. I barely managed to get us into one of those side tunnels—" Mikey tried to prop himself up then let out a cry when his arms failed to cooperate.

"Michelangelo, please—"

"Sensei!" But Mikey stubbornly pulled himself to turn and meet Fugitoid's gaze. "Fugitoid, how's Sensei? I—I'm not good at patching up things like Donnie, but I did my best then I came here as—as soon as I finished. I was worried I took too long, but I came on time, right? I got here on time for you to save him?"

"Mikey…" April had to bite down on her lip. She had seen Splinter before she came to see her friend, and she didn't have the courage to tell him the truth.

Fugitoid hesitated before placing his hand on the forcefield. "I'm sorry, Michelangelo."

In an instant, the light died down on Mikey's face. "What?"

"We worked to stabilize Master Splinter as soon as you two arrived. He has fewer injuries, but his wounds were more fatal. We," The robot's face turned sad. "We had to put him in a medical coma, because his body could not handle the stress. He is stable for now, but as for if he can make a full recovery…"

"No."

"Mikey?" April gasped when the little turtle tried to raise himself up. "Mikey, don't please! Your injuries!"

"NO! You're lying! You have to—you have to be lying!" Mikey screamed over his repeated attempts to get his shaky limbs to work. It was a painful sight for April, who can sense her friend's desperation and pain through her powers. "Sensei is, Sensei is strong! There's no way Sensei's going to lose from this! Not after Shredder, the Kraang, the Triceratons! There's no way! He can't be—!"

"You can barely stand, Michelangelo." Fugitoid's voice was soft and compassionate. "You will only hurt yourself more if you continue."

"WHO THE HELL CARES ABOUT ME?!" The terrapin snapped harshly, using too much force on his left leg that made him topple on his trunk to the floor with a scream.

April shrieked. "MIKEY!"

"Michelangelo!"

"ARGH! Stupid legs! Stupid arms! Move! DAMN IT, MOVE!" Mikey pushed himself to a crawl, clawing at the floor as he pulled his weak body with visible herculean effort that only succeeded in budging him an inch at a time. "Sensei!" Another inch forward. "I have to see Sensei!"

"Professor, do something!" April was openly crying, flinging herself to the forcefield and bracing her hands against it. "Mikey, it's OK! He's here. Master Splinter's still here. He's in the other room, resting just like you. Just focus on getting better for now and when you're ready, we'll go see him together." She hiccupped over Fugitoid sharply saying something she didn't catch. "Please, Mikey. Don't hurt yourself any further. Please."

"April." Tears poured down Mikey's cheeks, his hand reaching his end of the forcefield April's hand rested against. "April, please, you have to help me. I…I want to see my Dad. I want to see my Dad…"

"Oh Mikey." The strongest of Mikey's feelings, now haphazardly bombarding her mental shields, was the one she knew so well: when her father was first transformed because of that mutagen accident. How the absence of her father made her long so much to be a small child again and be held by her parents until all the hurt went away.

Yet compared to her, how many times have Mikey nearly lost his own father? It was like fate's sick joke, how often Splinter gets dangled at death's door.

But now it's not just Splinter. April realized. The way things are right now, it looks like Mikey's lost his whole family. Leo. Raph. Donnie. Splinter. All because of him. That son of a bitch Oroku Saki!

"April, move!"

"Ah!" The forcefield suddenly went down, but instead of pitching forward, April felt someone nudge her back, landing on her bum.

In an instant, Leatherhead and Bishop were on the little terrapin's either side, holding him back from trying standing up while Fugitoid hurried to them from the opposite side. "Be mindful of his injuries!"

"NO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO! SENSEI! SENSEI!"

"I'm so sorry, my friend." Never had April heard Leatherhead sound so remorseful.

The girl caught sight of Fugitoid grasping a small contraption on his right hand. A gun?

"Just a sedative, Ms. O'Neil." Fugitoid said reassuringly as he shot the gun on Mikey's arm. "To help him calm down."

THWICK!

And for April, it couldn't work fast enough, as each second Mikey pitifully trashed and screamed seemed to stretch into hours.

"Papa!" He sobbed hoarsely. "Papa! Papa!"

I'm sorry. April shut her eyes while putting her hands to the point of crushing over her ears, as if it could block Mikey's pain, anger and desperation, all threatening to suffocate her. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

"Papa! Leo-nii!" A sob. "Raphie-nii! Donnie-nii!" Another. "Anybody…"

Mikey, I'm so sorry.

"…Papaaaa…"

It was Bishop who was with Mikey when April and Casey arrived for their visit, sitting on the bench near the wall terminal reading a book.

"Mr. Jones. Ms. O'Neil." The alien gave a short nod.

April noticed Casey cringe and shook her head. "Just Casey and April, Bishop."

"Casey. April." Bishop repeated before turning to the former. "Casey, you passed out the last time we spoke due to fatigue and sensory overload. Have you fully recovered?"

"Err, you could say that," answered the vigilante. "How's Mikey?"

"Still asleep, though based on the sedative's duration of action, he will be waking soon." It was when Bishop pointed them that April noticed the foam circling the turtle's wrists and ankles. "The restraints are there to keep him to the bed in case he acts up again."

April frowned. "Isn't that a bit too much?"

Bishop's head tilted back to his book. "If you wish for Michelangelo's speedy recovery, then yes. Unless he can be reasoned with to be more cooperative. Or if you think it is better to keep him sedated."

The thought made both humans blanch as April stuttered. "That's—of course we don't—!"

Bishop merely flipped another page. "Exactly."

The psychic's eyes narrowed while Casey cleared his throat. "Is it OK if we stay here with him? Wait until he wakes up?"

Bishop nodded again, so April and Casey occupied two of the chairs to Mikey's right, their eyes on their sleeping friend. April nervously fiddled the hem of her skirt as she did, anxious on how Mikey will be like once he woke up again. Will he be furious at her for not helping him see Splinter? Would he angry at everyone else? Sure, Mikey can get irritated or annoyed, but not even once had she seen him become enraged (even during the times April really wished he would).

Is this the straw that would break the camel's back? Am I ready for it when it happens? April squeezed her eyes shut. Daddy, what should I do?

"Ugh…"

April's head shot up. "Mikey?"

The terrapin on the bed groaned before blinking slowly. "April?"

The girl knelt at Mikey's eye level with a small smile. "Yeah, I'm here, and so is Casey."

"Hey, little dude." Casey waved after squatting next to April.

Mikey winced. "Sorry, I can't keep my eyes open for too long yet. My head feels like it's being beatboxed. And my back. Oh man, my back."

"It's OK, Mikey. Just take it easy for now." April said soothingly. "Bishop and Fugitoid said you'll make a full recovery. But you'll need to rest as much as you can first. Do you need anything?"

Mikey hummed thoughtfully. "Is water OK?"

April turned to Bishop who pointed at the pitcher and covered glass on the nightstand. "Use the straw and do it slowly please."

Casey promptly filled the glass and propped the straw to Mikey's beak. A few sips after, Mikey pulled away with a slight smile. "Thanks, dude."

"No problem." Casey paused thoughtfully. "Hey, Bishop, is it OK for Mikey to eat too?"

"Yes, but only liquids for now. His body has to take it slow."

"So just plain soup." April nodded before turning back to Mikey. "How about we make you some nice chicken soup for dinner, once you're up for it? Like back then at the farmhouse?"

The little orange chuckled. "Too bad no noodles, huh?"

"We'll put those in once it's OK to."

Mikey hummed before widening his smile. "Anything to get the taste of…whatever this is out of my mouth. Eugh!"

April giggled as she patted the turtle's head fondly. Mikey seemed to be doing a bit better now, mood-wise. Maybe he's forgotten what happened earlier? Not that it's a good thing, but maybe it's for the best. Let him breathe a little—

"I'm sorry."

At that, April's train of positive thought derailed. "What?"

Mikey turned away. "You know, about earlier. About…Sensei."

She traded worried looks with Casey before speaking. "There's nothing to be sorry for, Mikey. Believe me, we understand why you reacted that way."

"But—"

"But nothing," said Casey. "You were down to two against at least a dozen, yet you managed to outsmart the Foot and save Sensei. Err, he's not back to top shape now, but you're not giving up that easy, are you?"

Mikey shook his head quickly. "It's…you don't get it…"

"Try us, Mikey."

"I fucked up, all right?!" Mikey's sudden outburst nearly made April fall onto her butt in shock. "I was supposed to keep Sensei safe! But I let him down! I let all of you down!" He tugged at his restraints, balling his hands into fists. "I knew it was risky. I knew it would have been dangerous for Sensei. But I let him do it anyway. I let my guard down and it's my fault!"

"What are you talking about?" April prompted.

"My nii—My bros, they were leading the Foot who tried to ambush us. When they cornered us at the storm drain, Sensei tried to use the Healing Hands on Leo. The technique he used on Karai, back when she had the brainworms. Obviously, it didn't work." Mikey laughed bitterly. "It actually made things worse."

"Oh no." April whispered. "Was it Leo who…?"

"No, it was Tiger Claw." The way the turtle said the other mutant's name—such acidic, acerbic venom—made the telepath's skin crawl. "Shot Sensei while my bros were fighting him."

"It was a four against one, Mikey." Casey tried to calm his friend down. "You did the best you could! Sensei knows that. We all do!"

"And it's not enough! My best is never enough!" Mikey pulled against his restraints again, banging his fists on his bed. "Why is it never enough?! Why am I never good enough?!"

"Mike—"

"I was stupid, so damn stupid! I didn't want to believe it, I tried so hard to prove that I'm not—!" A sob broke out of Mikey's throat. "Why wasn't it me? Why am I not the one in that coma? Why am I not the one who was captured by the Shredder?"

April felt her own eyes burn in frustration and helplessness. "No, Mikey, please don't think—"

But the turtle covered his face with his hands and a whimper of resignation. "I can't do this. How can I do this? I can't even think straight or keep my focus without Sensei. I'm nowhere near my brothers' level of fighting one on one. I'm not them. I'll never be as good as them. No matter what everyone else says, no matter how hard I've tried. I'll never be—"

"You humans write the most fascinating tales."

All heads swiveled to Bishop who snapped his book closed. April didn't bother to hide her disbelief at the alien's sudden interruption. "Excuse me?"

Bishop raised his book. "Zayton recommended this to me when I have nearly exhausted my reading list."

"The Count of Monte Cristo." April read on the cover. She remembered reading that for class once. "Well, that's nice, I suppose, but in case you haven't noticed, we have a more serious problem here."

"As you say." Whatever hostility April's tone held seemingly flew over Bishop's head, however, as the Utrom paused in front of Mikey. "But I take it you are unfamiliar with the story, Michelangelo?"

Mikey blinked languidly over a puzzled frown. "Sorry, Bishop, thick old books are more of Don's thing."

"It is about a man wrongly accused of treason, betrayed by some who he had trusted. The novel," Bishop raised the book for emphasis. "details his pursuit for justice."

"You mean revenge." April corrected dryly. "Edmond Dantes was not a shining pillar of virtue, as far as I remember."

"Because sometimes, April, in order to accomplish a goal, be it to right a wrong," Bishop's eyebrows narrowed. "Or to reclaim what is yours, you must be capable of making the hard decisions."

Casey scratched his head. "Sorry, can someone explain this to the guy who never pays attention in class?"

"Edmond Dantes lost everything—his home, his family, his bright future—because of greedy, envious, cowardly conspirators. A naïve simpleton who had nothing to his name and little to no skills or power, succeeded in attaining his revenge." Bishop continued. "True, he had help from his allies. But more than that, he had ambition. A dream." Black eyes met baby blue. "A drive."

At that, Mikey's eyes narrowed. "And what do you think I've been doing this for?"

"No, you have a goal, Michelangelo. Your drive, however, is severely lacking."

A split second quiet before the air rang with loud clanking, the restraints straining to keep Mikey in bed as he scowled at Bishop. "I lack drive? ME? TO SAVE MY OWN BROTHERS?! After everything I've done? After everything I've had to—?"

"No, you have not." Bishop's impassive face belied his hardened tone. "You have so much more to give."

"I've nearly lost everything! My home, my father. I could barely hold onto my friends!" Mikey gritted his teeth. "What else is there?! I have nothing left to lose, Bishop!"

"And what of yourself?" Bishop's query made April inhale sharply.

The orange masked turtle blinked in confusion. "Myself?"

"Edmond Dantes was a kind, innocent and honest young man, content with keeping his head down, doing what is expected of him. He never had a reason to rise to the occasion. All he wanted was a simple, happy life. Of course, that all changed with his imprisonment," said Bishop. "The Count of Monte Cristo was his opposite: bitter, hateful, ruthless but very effective. He used all of his resources and his talents for his revenge, giving everything that he was," A pause. "Nearly everything that he ever could be."

Mikey flinched, and April got to her feet. "And just what are you implying, Bishop?"

"When the Kraang tore our homeworld apart, I too have known loss. My friends. My family. Betrayed by someone I considered a brother." Bishop said coldly. "But I did not have the luxury of self-pity or surrender. My fellow Utroms needed their High Council. The Kraang, and every other threat to our kind, needed to stopped. To do so, I had done things my younger self thought I would never do. Things I never wanted to do. Things that haunt me to this very day."

April's gaze softened in compassion as she whispered. "Was it worth it?"

"Worth it?" The Utrom chuckled. "For the sake of my people, my home, there is nothing I will not do. Nothing I will not destroy. Therefore, I leave you this question, Michelangelo."

Mikey swallowed audibly when Bishop turned to him again.

"For your brothers, what are you willing to give?"

"You asked to see me, Mr. Kirby?"

April fidgeted worriedly next to her father, who sat across Splinter at the Lair dojo.

"Thank you for accommodating me, Master Splinter." Kirby said with a short nod. "I understand that the past several months have been difficult for you."

"Yes, well," Splinter's ears drooped slightly. "I take it April has told you everything?"

"Enough for me to know that you are treading very dangerous waters with that New York-based Yakuza." Mr. O'Neil's gaze sharpened. "Dare I say, your most dangerous challenge yet."

"It would seem so." The rat mutant sighed tiredly. "I will not lie, Mr. Kirby, this is the weakest we have ever been. Losing Leonardo, Raphael and Donatello is a fatal blow, and Saki will take advantage of it. That said, I cannot blame you for thinking it is best for April to not join us in this fight."

"Master Splinter—!" April would have stood in protest, if not for a look from her teacher.

"As much as you are a valued member of this clan, April, I cannot, in good conscience, allow you to fight with us without your father's consent. Not only because he is your guardian, but," Splinter's gaze turned sad. "As a father, I know where is coming from. The pain of losing a child, it is something I would never wish upon anyone, especially not on a good friend."

April ran a hand over her face in frustration, wishing for the millionth time that she never told her father the truth. He had been so worried about her late-night excursions lately and have not seen the turtles for a while, so she foolishly told him everything in the hopes of easing his anxieties and that she'll get him to understand.

And what did she get for her honesty? Being grounded indefinitely.

Best idea ever, April O'Neil, she grumbled to herself. And from the looks of things, Splinter is going to agree with dad's decision. Why did I have to mess this up so badly, just when Mikey needs me the most?

Her eyes glinted hard on the tatami flooring. It can't be helped if even Splinter won't let me help anymore. I'll just find a way to sneak out somehow. Not even dad can stay awake on guard forever, and it'll be a good practice for my kunoichi skills! Because nothing's going to stop me from helping my brothers, not even my dad or Splinter! I just need to—

"—but recent events led me to rethink my position."

Wait, what? April's eyes swiveled to her father, wide and confused. What is he talking about?

Splinter sounded just as perplexed. "What do you mean?"

Kirby smiled slightly. "I must say, your youngest son can be quite persuasive. Him and that boy, Casey I believe his name was?"

Mikey and Casey? The girl gasped wordlessly. They talked to her father while she was grounded? And she hadn't noticed? When? How?

"I see." Splinter stroked his beard, tone neutrally curious. "Did he and Casey plead for her as well?"

The red-haired psychologist shook his head. "In part. Actually, the first thing Michelangelo did was apologize."

"Apologize?"

"On behalf of the Hamato clan, he said, in a full Japanese style bow." Kirby elaborated. "He apologized for making me worry about my daughter, for involving her in this mess with the Foot. He said he understood why I did and did not hold my actions against me, because," He paused. "Because he said I was being a…good father, like his Sensei, and that he is glad that April has me for a father."

April's eyes widened as her heart swelled for both her father and her littlest brother. Mikey…

"He and Casey then spoke highly of April's abilities as a fighter, of how much she's helped them in their fight against these Foot men and the aliens. Casey spoke of how brave she was, of how resourceful and determined she could be. Michelangelo spoke of how much he appreciated her kindness and care towards the turtles, of how he had come to see her as his older sister. And…" Kirby took a deep breath. "And then those two boys both swore, on their weapons, and Michelangelo, on his ninja honor, that they will protect her with their very lives if it had to come to that."

She heard Splinter inhale sharply but it seemed so far away compared to the words ringing in her ears right now.

They swore, on their weapons, on their honor as shinobi… April felt tears spring from her eyes, her chest heavy with emotion.

Splinter gave words to the gravity she knew her friends' actions entailed. "To swear upon one's honor as a Hamato shinobi, Mr. Kirby, Michelangelo knows it is not something our clan does lightly. My son has all but guaranteed that he would die to keep your daughter safe. As he would for his brothers."

The thought of it made April flinch sharply.

"And the most amazing thing, is that even after all that, those boys still left the decision to me," added Kirby. "They did not plead their case so fervently like I expected they would. They made their case, of how much they needed April and that they are willing to go to such lengths to protect her, yet they would also respect my decision. In Michelangelo's own words," The man let out a breath. "I will not allow the Foot to hurt another family, the same way they have hurt mine.

"But what Michelangelo failed to remember at the time, is that the Hamatos have long been April's family," He then turned to April. "And if there is one thing I know about my daughter, is that she never backs down from anything for the sake of family."

And just like that, whatever irritation the girl had for her father was whisked away.

"…Daddy!" The girl cried, bounding up to him in a tight hug.

Kirby smiled faintly before squeezing April's arm. "I'm sorry for making the last three days difficult for you."

"I'm sorry too, Daddy." April said softly. "I do get that you're worried, and I appreciate it. I just let my frustration over all this get the better off me."

"That, and my unreasonably obstinate overprotective fits, as you put it."

"Maybe a little." April nodded with a watery chuckle. "OK, maybe more than a little, but I get it."

"I mean it, sugar bear." Kirby met April's gaze. "You're all the good that's left in the world for me. And all I have left of your mother."

"You have me, Daddy." She assured him. "Whether against the Kraang, the Triceratons or any other bad guy, if someone tries to kidnap you again, I'll fight them tooth and nail to get you back. That's what family does. That's what family means."

"And the Hamatos are family. For both you and me." The older red-haired man nodded with a resigned smile. "Just, promise me you'll come back in one piece."

"I will, Daddy. I promise."

"…Is that your final decision, Mr. Kirby?"

Oh, right! April's face colored when she caught sight of Splinter smirking from across her and Kirby. "S—Sorry, Master Splinter."

"In hindsight, I should have known that even if I tried, nothing would have stopped April from fighting alongside you," Kirby shook his head in exasperation. "She's always been a force of nature. She would have not let even me get in her way of helping her friends."

"That she is." Splinter nodded before he set his hands before himself in a low bow. "And on behalf of the Hamato clan, allow me to thank you both for all your help for these past years. And rest assured that I too swear on my honor as the Hamato clan head, to protect these children with my very life."

"Master Splinter!" But before April could ask the rat mutant to lift his head, to her further shock, her father followed suit, bowing back at Splinter.

"And I thank you, Master Splinter. You and your brave, wonderful children."

Mikey…Casey… April smiled fondly over the tears that fell from her eyes. You two idiots are so going to get it later.

And somewhere in the pit, a turtle and a human boy simultaneously sneezed.

It was half past seven when April and Casey returned to Mikey's room with the tray of chicken soup and tea she had promised. Bishop informed them by telecom that the little turtle had just woken up and was "childishly incessant" on having something to eat or he will end up "chewing away his bedsheets."

"I'm saaaaved!" Mikey's eyes went comically big with delight when April and Casey appeared with his food.

"Wow, Mikey, never think I'd see you excited for soup." The black haired vigilante joked.

"Dude, when you're desperate for any kind of chow, anything other than nothing is divine!"

"…That actually sounds pretty deep!"

"Boys." April rolled her eyes at their exchange before remarking on what she first noticed. "Bishop? What were you guys doing?"

Instead of being in his quiet little corner, his nose under his novel, the alien had moved his chair closer to Mikey's bed, with a bedside table standing between him and Mikey's head.

"Bishop's been teaching me to play Black Jack!" Mikey answered cheerfully. "At first, I wanted to play Poker, because Raph and Donnie never got around to teaching me—and I've been asking them since I was thirteen—but then Bishop pointed out that I can't hold the cards because my wrists are still grounded because I've been a bad boy and stuff, so—"

"He is bored. My auditory receptors have grown weary." Bishop gestured the cards. "And so, a compromise."

"It's actually a lot of fun, though. We should play sometime!" Mikey jerked at thumb at the Utrom. "Bishop's been wiping the floor with me because he's like a Black Jack master!"

"So you think you'll have an easier time with me?" Casey smirked. "Sorry, little dude, but I've been playing cards since I was ten! Who'd you think's been whooping Raph's ass in poker so much?"

Mikey's eyes went all sparkly on Casey. "Woah…"

April shook her head in amusement. "Yeah, and I'm pretty sure you lost to Donnie more times than you beat Raph."

"Hey, how did you—?" Casey spluttered. "Why that little tattle tale!"

"As amusing as this discussion is becoming," Bishop cleared his throat, having already cleared Mikey's bedside table. "I believe someone is due his dinner?"

"Oh, right." April smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, Mikey."

The robot piloting alien nodded. "I have to take my leave. There is something I need to discuss with Zayton."

Mikey waved at Bishop's retreating back. "Rematch later, Big B!"

Casey snickered. "Big B?"

"What? It works! Sorta! Now can I have some soup?"

For a while, it felt like everything was back to normal with them again, with Mikey being his eager, chipper self as he finished his meal with gusto (and a little help). They even managed to throw in a few rounds of Black Jack, and some poker matches between April and Casey to help Mikey learn its basics.

"Shit, I fold." Casey mumbled grumpily with a flick of his cards. "Why are you and Donnie so good at this?"

April smirked. "Because unlike a couple of hotheads, I can actually pull off a pretty good poker face." She then turned to Mikey. "So what do you think? Got the gist of it?"

"Mostly." Mikey answered. "I've got the card combos down, but I might need to work on my poker face. No, no, make that the Mikey face!" He then grinned. "Anything with my name on it is always way cooler!"

"Give it time, little dude!" Casey held a thumbs up. "You learn pretty fast! You'll be beating the guys in these games after a little practice once all this is over."

And just like that, the light dimmed in the youngest Hamato's eyes. "Yeah…right…after."

April and Casey traded frowns but kept quiet.

"I know I should be stronger than this. It's not like we've had our asses kicked so hard by the Shredder before." Mikey bit his lower lip. "But I, I'm scared, guys."

"Oh, Mikey." April put an arm around his shoulder, resting her head on his shoulder. "It's OK to be scared. I think we all are, even just a little, with Master Splinter out and the guys with the Shredhead."

"Yeah, it's like us against the world right now." Casey shook his head. "But it's not that different from the Kraang's first invasion, right? They may have gotten Leo, Raph, Don and Splinter, but the game's not over yet! Not while we still have you!"

"You mean that?"

"And you have us too, Mike! Well, we may not be in your level yet, but we can hold our own!"

April winced at the memory, the smell of charred flesh, the smoke, all those screams.

I killed them…

She felt Mikey's head lightly bump against hers, his baby blues soft with concern.

"I'm OK, guys." She answered his unasked question hoarsely. "Just…bad memories, is all."

Mikey's gaze averted down. "I'm sorry. I…I heard from Leatherhead what you and Casey had to go through. I never would have wanted—I would have done everything to—"

"Mikey, stop. It's OK." Casey grimaced and shook his head. "Not all good, but taking it from Bishop, we don't have the time to dwell on it. Not until we get your brothers back."

April took a deep breath before adding, "Casey's right. We'll, I'll be all right. Someday." She forced the crimson and fire scorched memories back. "I don't care what it takes, we'll get Leo, Raph and Donnie back, and we'll make the Shredder pay for everything he's done tenfold! So please, please don't ever give up. Believe me, we need you, Mikey. Even if you think you're not as good as the other turtles, we wouldn't have gotten this far if it weren't for you. And we're with you. All the damn way."

"She's got right, Mikey." Casey slid close to the pair, a hand on Mikey's freckled head. "Even if it's just us against the world, we've got you, little bro."

The telepath felt Mikey tremble under her arm, a myriad of emotions washing over her senses, and for a moment, she was worried he would cry again.

(A part of her wondered if the turtles were any better than her when it came to handling a crying Mikey. It was so far off from the chipper sunshine of a turtle she was used to that it was jarring and heartbreaking to see it once, let alone twice.)

But then, the terrapin took a deep breath. "I love you, guys. You know that, right?"

…Oh, scratch that. Now he was making her cry again.

Casey coughed, his cheeks turning light red. "W—Well, of course you do! I mean, how can you not love the awesomeness that is Casey Jones?"

The red head flicked at her human friend's forehead. "Idiot!" She laughed fondly nonetheless.

"I wouldn't have made it this far without all of you either. You guys really leveled up to the occasion." The turtle inhaled again. "And…I guess I'd be a total loser if I just rolled over and let you all down without a fight, huh?"

"We know you won't, Mikey." Casey nodded confidently. "You might trip every now and then, but what's life without a few curveballs?" The boy wrinkled his nose. "Curveballs made of thorns and barbed wire, but still."

"…Thanks, April, Casey." The little turtle smiled gently. "I really have…the best siblings ever."

That statement should have made April's chest burn with pride and happiness, but the way Mikey said it, and the faraway look in his eyes—wistful, pained, almost sad—filled her with trepidation instead. "Mikey…"

"And I made a promise, didn't I? Michelangelo may be a lot of things, but he never goes back on his word." His round baby blue eyes then turned into harshly glinting aquamarines.

"I'll save my brothers from the Foot. Even if it's the last thing I'll ever do."

可愛い娘には旅をさせよ: Send your cute child on a journey

Oh, the painful task of breaking Mikey before putting him back together haphazardly to continue the fight. So what do you guys think?

CHUCHI'S CULTURAL CORNER

-"Onegai, Fugitoid, Papa wa…Papa wo…tasukete kudasai…": "Please, Fugitoid, Papa is…(Please save Papa…)"

-門前の小僧習わぬ経を読む: (Monzen no kozō nara wanu kyō wo yomu) It means that someone will be able to learn from their environment even without formal training, like language for example: a foreigner in a certain place most likely be able to use their language after staying with them for several years. Of further note, the characters for boy in this quote 小僧 read as kozo (lit: young one/youth), made up of two kanji 小 (ko for small) and 僧 (so for monk/priest). In one way, you can translate this quote as "A young monk near a temple will recite the scriptures untaught," which is the traditional way of doing so. On the other hand, because I wanted it to be about Casey, I read it as "A boy (or youth, but boy sounds nicer)…" TL;DR: 小僧 is kozo which can either be read as young monk/priest or youth (typically a boy).

-可愛い娘には旅をさせよ: (kawaii ko ni wa tabi o saseyo) Simply put, let your children go and explore the world (you overprotective—just kidding. :D) Again, my translation of this requires further expansion: the character meant to be read as as ko here is 娘 which is actually read as musume (lit: daughter). The true kanji for ko (and the one originally in this quote) is 子 (lit: child). I switched the characters on purpose, because I wanted to make it more about April, hence the use of 娘. But I still maintained the original reading because style reasons. Strictly speaking, 子 is child (ko) while is 娘 daughter (musume).

Kanji for the chapter title is 小僧と娘: (Kozo to Musume) lit. Boy and Girl, in reference to Casey and April and the quotes for them.

-A word on ninja honor: Research shows that historically, ninjas aren't big on honor. At least, the conventional view of honor in combat because they can fight dirty when they have to. That is because one could say that ninjas viewed themselves as tools—their purpose, first and foremost, is to complete their mission, by any means necessary. The second is to survive, again by any means necessary. That is not to say that ninjas did not follow their own set of moral codes, an example of which is their loyalty towards their masters. I think that as times changed, ninja clan beliefs and practices did too. And it's not far off the mark for someone like Splinter to incorporate principles of bushido, altruism and honor into the Hamato clan's ninja code. So Mikey swearing on his ninja honor and his nunchuks (in place of a sword) is a very big deal, and is something based on the samurai way of doing things that was part of what Splinter adapted into the clan's ninja code.

HEADCANONS AND OTHER EXTRAS:

-The time travel whammy TMNT 2012 season 4 pulled off was wrapped up pretty bad. Time travel has always been a complicated story element no matter what type of it you use. The branching timeline here left the glaring consequence that there are two versions of the turtles, Casey and April and "a wondrous adventure in space" is not going to fix things even if the old future selves will be going indefinitely. It's like sweeping that issue under the rug, and that scenario itself opens a whole new can of worms. I know it's a kids' show and I shouldn't nitpick so much but, meh. So in my version, the gang didn't time travel, but instead went with Fugitoid to find a way to reverse engineer the Heart of Darkness and undo the damage it caused, then Fugitoid eventually sacrificed himself to destroy the Heart and the Triceraton fleet who tried to seize it again. Not well thought out, but I like it better than the canon so it's staying.

-Casey's background in TMNT 2012 isn't fleshed out well either. From what I know in the lore, Casey's got a father and a little sister, and the father is not very nice. I'm using that concept for this fic, and I'm adding that he and his mother aren't very close because his mother thinks he is a bad influence on his sister (who is obviously her favorite). The only one who loves Casey in the family unconditionally is his little sister, who Casey has a soft spot for and spoils whenever he could. April has only met her once and is amused on how Casey easily turns into a giant teddy bear for the little princess.

-It always bugged me that April is made an honorary Hamato through shinobi training while Casey is sort of overlooked. After everything he's been through with the turtles, I think he deserves to be part of the clan like April officially is. Still, this is my way of explaining why that didn't happen in canon. I just wished that they made Casey more essential to the story and characters the same way 2003 Casey had been in his series.

-Among the turtles, the only ones who know how to play poker are Raph and Donnie. Leo wasn't interested to learn (he thinks gambling games are bad, and he'd rather play with his Captain Ryan pinball). Mikey had said he wanted to (many times) but Raph and Donnie always keep forgetting to teach him, and they always send him away during gametime with Casey because a loud little orange makes it hard to concentrate.

Thank you as always for reading! Please leave a review/favorite/follow if you enjoyed and want to see more. Really appreciate your feedback and hope you enjoyed it!

Stay Safe, Everyone! Wash Your Hands!