[A/N: Because I have no self-control, apparently. This is a crossover between the 'One and a Half Stans' AU (where Stan gets de-aged and is taken care of by Dipper, Mabel, and an increasingly guilty Ford) and canon GF, BEFORE 'Not What He Seems.' As you can tell by the title... Stan, Ford, and Stanley will be in the same scene at some point.

I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this, but this is definitely supposed to be a lot more handwave-y of canon than my other fics. So what if spontaneous dimensional travel doesn't happen? I want old men angst and secrets to be unearthed, and this is how I'm going to do it, I guess.]

Mabel nudged Dipper with her shoulder. "Dipper!" She whispered, voice hushed, a finger pointing excitedly. "Look at him!"

There was a boy wandering around in the Shack, oblivious to their presence. He looked just a few years younger than the two of them, with a single missing tooth and a bandage over his cheek. He looked vaguely confused.

Dipper blinked. "Shoot, do you think he got left behind from the last tour? Grunkle Stan left ten minutes ago, so -"

"Nooo! Not about that!" She pulled him closer, her grin growing larger. "Don't you think he looks familiar?"

He stared at the kid in question, completely lost. Brown hair, round face, striped shirt... "No," Dipper said finally. "Not ringing a bell." The only kid he knew around that age was Gideon, and the last he had heard, the jerk was still locked up in jail.

"What?" Mabel groaned, a little too loudly. "Dipper, I can't believe -"

"Mabel, he's gonna hear us!"

She yanked him down behind the counter, just as the mystery kid turned to look in their direction. "Dipper, he looks just like you when did in third grade!"

Dipper blinked. "Uh, no. No he doesn't."

"Well, let's see how long you can deny it... when I have photographic evidence!" Mabel whipped out her scrapbook, narrowly missing Dipper's head.

"Mabel, be careful!"

"And all I need to do is find - here! Look at that!"

Dipper swallowed down the embarrassment that always came with seeing pictures of himself as a kid, and. "Wait a minute," he said out loud. "Wait, this is -"

"Ha! Now you see it!"

He ignored her and squinted down at the picture, enraptured by the newest mystery to come his way. "His nose is a bit bigger, but really, that's it," Dipper muttered to himself. "He even has that little tuft of hair. Or... maybe I'm looking too much into this, and it's just all a coincidence..."

Mabel peeked over the counter. "He really knows his way around the Shack," she said. "He's looking in all of our best hiding places."

"Huh, that's weir - Oh no." The realization hit. "Mabel, get down here!" He pulled her down, hiding both of them from view again. "I think he's looking for us!"

"That's ridiculous, bro-bro. He doesn't even know us!"

"Mabel, that guy is not what he seems! This - this could be like the Shapeshifter again! What if that thing escaped, and now it's pretending to be me so no one knows the truth?"

Mabel squinted. "But he doesn't look exactly like you. Just a lot like you."

He was panicking, he knew, but couldn't bring himself to especially care. "Then, he could be a clone! An evil one, not like Tyrone. Maybe the cloning copy machine messed up a little, and -"

"Hey! Calm down, bro-bro."

"Mabel, that guy could be dangerous! We need to - " A round head popped into view right behind Mabel, pearly whites exposed in a wide, gap-toothed grin. "Agh!"

"Dipper, what's -"

"It's him! It's the guy! He's right behind you!"

Mabel yelped, and both twins scrambled away from the intruder. Dipper eyed him warily, left hand already curling into a fist, preparing himself for anything -

- when the boy burst into giggles. "Y'guys should've seen the look on your faces!" He managed through his laughter.

Dipper and Mabel exchanged identical looks of complete and utter confusion. "Um," Dipper tried. "Who -"

"I can't believe the both of you guys were hidin' from me all afternoon!" The boy exclaimed, with a accent that was decidedly not West Coast. "Did Soos do somethin' to the Shack when I was outside? A buncha exhibits are missin', and I don't see 'em anywhere!"

"I d-don't -" Dipper stammered.

"What my bro-bro here is trying to say," Mabel cut in, a serious expression on her face, "is... who the heck are you? And, you know Soos?"

The boy's grin faltered. "Geez, Dipper, Mabel... this isn't funny."

He met Dipper and Mabel's resolute stares, and swallowed. "I - I'm Stanley, remember? I've been livin' with you guys f - for a week now... and 'course I know Soos! Y'guys were the ones who introduced me to 'im."

'Stanley?' Mabel mouthed in confusion. Dipper shook his head. "We don't know anyone called Stanley," he said out loud.

"But, I -" The boy's - Stanley's expression jumped from confused to distressed to resolute.

"W-Where's Ford?" He demanded. "I wanna talk to Ford."

Dipper and Mabel exchanged another look. "Who's Ford?" Mabel asked blankly.

Stanley blinked. "Ford! How do you guys not know Ford?" He asked, sounding almost as confused as they were. "I - It's short for 'Stanford.' He's - real big, and super old, and - and falls asleep on the couch a lot -"

"Stanford - Stanford Pines?" Dipper exclaimed, complete thrown out of the loop. There was no way... "You mean," Mabel followed, just as lost, "you're looking for Grunkle Stan?"

"Maybe. Y'always called him Grunkle Ford before," Stanley said, almost petulantly.

There was no mistaking it - after all, Dipper and Mabel only had one Grunkle. But... "Why, exactly, are you looking for Grunkle Stan?" Dipper demanded.

"B-Because Ford can figure out everythin'! He's always liked weird stuff. He'll understand, and I'm gonna talk to him. And," the boy continued, almost as if trying to reassure himself, "he won't be weird - not like you."

That... did not sound like Grunkle Stan. "I think... you might be looking for the wrong guy," Dipper said weakly. "Our Grunkle... he's just a grumpy old man. And he hates the supernatural. And kids."

"Other than us!" Mabel added.

Stanley shook his head. "He's a grumpy old man now," he said crossly. "And he doesn't hate me." There was something off about the last bit, as if there was a deeper story there that Dipper did not particularly want to delve into. "Tell me where Ford is!"

"He's - busy right now," Dipper said quickly. Grunkle Stan wasn't a bad person, but he wasn't a particularly nice one either. He had a soft spot for Dipper and Mabel, but if some random kid interrupted his tour yelling about the supernatural... As weird as Stanley was, he wasn't Gideon. Dipper didn't want to see him chased out of the Shack with a broom. "I don't think he wants any interruptions."

The other boy eyed him warily, his arms crossed in front of his chest. "I just wanna know where Ford is," he said again. "If ya won't tell me where Ford is - I don't care'f you're Dipper, I'll punch ya, hard!"

Dipper stared. "Seriously? You're nine - "

"Both of you, stop it!" Mabel exclaimed, shoving her way between them. "Okay," she said, turning to Stanley, "I don't know why you're calling Grunkle Stan 'Ford' and how you know our names, but there's definitely something weird going on. You can talk to our uncle after he's done with his tour."

Stanley nodded, albeit a bit hesitantly. "But -" Dipper started.

"And Dipper," Mabel said, leaning in towards him to whisper in his ear, "You already beat up a nine year old this summer. Don't make it a habit!"

Immediate disaster momentarily averted, Mabel leaned back. "Guys, I have an idea," she said resolutely. "Let's go find Soos. Stanley says he knows him, right? So if Soos does know him, then we know its me and Dipper who's weird. If he doesn't, then..." Mabel pointed at Stanley. "You're the one who's weird. Sounds good?"

Dipper and Stanley exchanged a look. "Um," Dipper said, the same time as the other boy shrugged.

"Good!" Mabel cheered, and with a surprising amount of strength, yanked both boys with her as she ran out the door.

Stanford opened the door a crack. "Kids, have either of you seen Stan?"

Dipper and Mabel peered up at him with clear confusion. "He said he was going downstairs to find you," Dipper said, squinting at the clock on the wall. "Fifteen - Twenty minutes ago? I think. You didn't see him?"

His hand clenched bloodless white on the doorknob. "That can't be right," Ford said slowly, a cold pit opening in his stomach. "I haven't seen him the whole day."

"Maybe he's with Soos or Wendy!" Mabel offered.

"That's probably it. I'll - check with them," he said quickly, and closed the door. Stanford took a deep breath, then another, and tried to stop the shaking of his six-fingered hands.

Stanley was fine. Ford was just... being overprotective.

But how could he not, when his brother was - was a child again? A child who still looked at him as if he made the sun rise every morning, who knew nothing of the events of the last forty years. A child, in the town of Gravity Falls, where anything could happen -

- and where Ford's greatest enemy was always looking for a weak link.