A/N: sorry this became smut

"The Notebook," she answers, once she's back in her previous spot, her thigh still touching his but the rest of their bodies inches apart.

"Hm?"

"We should watch The Notebook next."

It's dumb – to suggest a movie so classically romantic. But it's her favourite – or so she says – and maybe it will give them that push to explore their relationship further than whatever it seems to be right now. He arches his brow at her in response and she just shrugs, placing her wine glass on the table with the long-forgotten popcorn and hot chocolate.

"The Notebook? Really?" he muses.

"Yes, really," she laughs, pretends that she doesn't know what he's getting at, that she doesn't realize all the lines that they could be skirting. "Why, what's so funny about that?"

"Just didn't picture you as the romantic type, I guess."

"Even if I weren't, who doesn't love staring at Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling for a couple of hours?"

He laughs, looks at her with a genuine smile on his face, the one where his eyes crinkle in happiness. She smiles too, laughs with him, and she realizes that despite everything that happened in the past few days, she hasn't been this happy in a long time.

Once he's back on the couch and the movie's playing on the screen in front of them, she inches back towards him. She goes for subtle, although who is she kidding, and eventually is back to where she was during the previous movie - her body tucked into his, her head resting in the crook of his neck. He brings his arm down from the head of the couch, resting it instead behind her back, his hand settling on her waist, fingers trailing gentle patterns on her stomach, causing warmth to spark throughout her.

It's easy being like this with him, it's something she can see for their future. Nights like this, where they stay here with just one another's company. Her mind fills with images of them dancing in the kitchen to the quiet hum of music in the middle of the night, the lights shining in from the city surrounding them. Images of them cooking dinner together, of them sitting like this watching television after a long day, images of children with his eyes and her smile running around the loft.

She's getting ahead of herself, shouldn't be thinking things along these lines, but it's her and it's him and she knows once they start this thing between them, there will be no going back.

It's not love between them, not yet, but it's more than lust, more than just physical attraction, and she's fully aware that once she gets a taste of him, she won't be able to stop.

She returns her focus to the movie, finds herself mouthing along to her favourite scenes. She can feel his gaze turned on her at those points, can tell that he's smiling because of it – even if she can't see it – and it makes her happy.

It makes her happy that she can make him happy.

She's able to concentrate on the movie for a while – longer than she had expected – but once the scenecomes on, all thoughts of the movie leave her mind and all she can think about is him.

The weight of his hand on her stomach goes from a barely-there touch to all she can feel. All she wants is his hands on her - there and everywhere - and it's a dangerous thought, a set of actions that would push them far enough that there would be no going back, but right now that's all she wants.

"Some kiss…" he breathes, his eyes still not looking at her.

"Uh huh," she replies, and it's verging on awkward. The tension between them is palpable, the air thick with it. She's tense, looking around the room, trying to focus her attention on something, anything, else, but her eyes keep finding their way back to his lips.

She's staring at him now, not even trying to hide it anymore, but he's staring back, his eyes moving between her eyes and lips. She licks her lips, watches him as he watches her and something snaps between them.

She's on him then. Her hands on his face, mouth pressed hotly to his. His tongue seeks entrance, which she doesn't hesitate in giving him, allowing him to taste, explore, and she feels like she's on fire.

She pulls herself into his lap, her thighs are bracketing his waist, her hips pressing firmly into his, providing pressure in all the right places. She threads her fingers through his hair, pulls his mouth closer to hers. The kiss is heated, his mouth hot against hers, his tongue not at all hesitant, and she's burning with it. He tastes like a mix of chocolate, red wine, and something that can only be described as Rick and it's making her head spin. He's good, they're good together, and the kiss is surpassing all of her previous expectations, so much better than she could have ever imagined it.

His hands move from their place on her waist to her ass, pressing her into him, hard, and she breaks the kiss, lets out a moan that she would probably be embarrassed about if she wasn't so turned on right now.

Rick takes advantage of the position change, attaches his mouth to her neck, nipping, laving, sucking and he's going to leave her wearing turtlenecks for the next week but who even cares when it feels this good. She twines her fingers through his hair, holding him there as if he would leave if she didn't, but he pulls back causing her to loosen her grip and let out a quiet whimper. Before she has the chance to question him though, he's pulling off his navy Henley, forcing her hands away for just a moment, giving her a chance to remove her shirt as well - and oh, god, she's straddling Richard Castle in his living room with no shirt on.

"Should we be doing this?" she whispers once they're both naked from the waist up - her left in just a black lace bra and him completely bare - his nose touching hers. She's not sure. Maybe it's too soon, maybe they aren't ready. But she wants this, him, and really, how will they know if they never try?

"I don't know," he replies, his eyes locked on hers, a mix of arousal and apprehension shining in them, but then he's pressing another kiss to her lips, allowing her to deepen it, take control, as his hands trace patterns on the newly exposed skin of her back.

"Bedroom," she breathes out, as they part for air. Rick huffs, but stands, gripping her tightly with one arm under her thighs and the other at her back. She wraps her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck, securing herself to him. She uses this opportunity to return the favour he had been paying her on the couch, pressing her lips to his neck, beginning soft and sweet, but quickly becoming more desperate, harsh. She's pretty sure he won't complain either way.

They make it to his room without much hassle and he drops her onto his bed, gentler than she thought he'd be, but it's good, she likes gentle, she likes him.

He kisses her, softer than he had been on the couch, before guiding her back towards the head of his bed, resting her head upon the pillows.

"You're beautiful," he murmurs, placing kisses to her forehead, cheeks, jawline, travelling further down with each kiss, until he's at the edge of her bra. "So goddamn beautiful."

Heat floods to her cheeks, she doesn't know what to say. His words lovely and intimate and maybe just a bit too much for her to process, so she just smiles at him, gently brushes the unruly hairs off of his forehead, skims her thumb across his cheek. She nods, giving him whatever permission he may think he needs to continue his exploration of her body.

He kisses the tops of her breasts, the skin visible above her bra, before moving down, taking her left nipple into his mouth through the lace, bringing his hand up to massage the other. She moans, loud and uninhibited, but she doesn't care, not right now. Her left hand is on his neck, rubbing it gently as she holds him in place while her right is gripping the sheets by her head. He's relentless, sucking and nipping at her, switching between breasts, paying even attention to both, and she swears she could come from this act alone.

He reaches behind her, unclasps the bra with ease, and she slips her arms out of it, tosses it somewhere across the room, decides she'll deal with it in the morning. He latches onto her bare nipple, suckling, somehow managing to be both gentle and rough at the same time, and oh it's so doing it for her.

Rick moves the hand that had been resting by her head down to her waist, drawing gentle patterns on her side, stomach, trailing them lower and lower until he reaches the waistband of her underwear. He stops then, lifts his mouth from her chest – causing her to let out a whimper – and looks up at her.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" he asks, climbing back up her body so that his face is even with hers. "This isn't some delayed 'I-almost-died' life-affirming sex or something?"

He tries to sound teasing, but she can see the insecurity shining in his eyes. She pulls him back into a kiss, tries to pour the words she's not sure she's ready to share with him into it, tries to make him understand.

"Castle - Rick, no," she sighs, looking down at their bodies before bringing her eyes back to his. "This isn't some life affirming thing... not for me, at least. I like you, a lot, and I… I don't want this to be a one time thing."

"You don't?"

"No."

"Oh, thank god." He's smiling at her, wide and genuine and she huffs out a laugh, amused by his excitement. Then he's kissing her again, hard, and his hand that had been previously halted is sliding over the top of her thong, rubbing her clit through the thin lace material, and she's sure he can feel how wet she is, how much he's turning her on, and she realizes that she doesn't care – she wants him to know how much he affects her.

She arches into him, chases the pressure his hand is providing, but then he's moving away, bringing his hand back up to her stomach before dipping under the waistband. He's slower with his exploration now, takes his time traveling to her clit, circles it maddeningly slow when he gets there, causing her to squirm and whimper underneath him, before he takes it lower, sliding his index finger through her slit.

"Fuck, you're wet," he groans, his breath hot against her cheek.

"All for you."

He slides two fingers into her then, the palm of his hand pressing hard against her clit. She moans, kissing him with all she has in attempt to muffle the sounds she's letting out. His mother and daughter aren't home, but she still feels like she should be issuing some level of restraint.

She moans, her eyes rolling back and oh god she's going to come.

"Fuck, Rick," she moans, pulling his head to the crook of her neck. "Don't stop, don't stop, I'm gonna –"

"I'm not stopping," he growls, pressing his palm down just the slightest bit harder and she snaps. Her body goes tense as she pulses around his fingers, her mouth open on a silent moan.

His fingers slow, but he keeps them moving, helping her ride out her orgasm.

Her eyes flutter open (when did she shut them?) moments later, and she sees him smiling at her.

"Wow," she whispers.

"Yeah."

He's beside her now, must've rolled off of her while she was in her post-orgasm haze. He's studying her, something more than lust in his eyes, and it should unnerve her, scare her, but it doesn't. Not in the slightest.

"I meant what I said earlier, about this not being a one-time thing," she whispers, not wanting to break the peace that seems to have fallen over the room. "I care about you Rick, a lot, and I'm in this if you are."

"God, you know how to turn a man on."

"So you feel the same?" she asks, uncertainty clouding her brain, because if he doesn't want more of this, of her, she's not sure she can go through with this.

"Kate," his voice is soft yet determined. "Look at me?"

She does.

"There's nothing I want more, okay?" he breathes, pressing a kiss to her clavicle, lingering there. "Don't ever question that."

"Okay," she replies, failing to suppress the grin forming on her face, and she's pretty sure her eyes are shining just as bright as his. "Now will you hurry up and fuck me?"

It's crass. A polar opposite of the words that had just been exchanged between them, but she wants him, needs him, and she's not afraid to let him know. Not anymore.

"Bossy," he murmurs, placing a soft kiss to her mouth, before winking. "I like it."

They're moving then, reaching to pull down his boxers and remove her now ruined underwear, as he reaches past her, grabbing a condom from his bedside table.

She takes it from his hands, fluidly tears the wrapper open with her teeth, and if the glint in his eyes is anything to go by, it has the desired effect.

"On your back," she commands, her words softened by the smile adorning her face. He's smiling too, as he follows her instructions, rolling off of her and onto the sheets to her left.

She climbs on top of him, her knees placed on either side of his waist, straddling his thighs, just inches away from where she aches to be sitting. She smiles at him, wide, showing her teeth, as she reaches down, only tearing her gaze from his as she looks down to roll on the condom.

"I can't believe this is finally happening," he whispers, as she readjusts them, positioning him at her entrance. She hums in agreement, which soon turns into a moan as she glides him through her slit, coating him in her wetness before finally sinking down.

Twin moans fill the room. They stay like that for moments, taking in the feeling of closeness. He's still, allowing her the time to adjust, but she doesn't need it, she just needs him to move. So she rolls her hips, grinds onto him, and oh god, she's not going to last long. Although, by the quiet 'fuck' he lets out, she doesn't think he will either.

He bucks his hips then, hard, and it pulls her from her thoughts, back to him. He's staring at her, looking at her with so much awe in his eyes, like he truly can't believe this is happening. But then again, neither can she.

She leans down to kiss him then, moves her hands from their place on his chest to beside his head. The kiss is soft, more them breathing each other in than anything, a juxtaposition to the way their hips are moving.

She buries her face in his neck, presses open-mouth kisses there as she grinds down onto him.

"I'm close," she mumbles into his skin, biting down a bit too much on a particularly sharp thrust.

"Let go, Kate," he groans, sliding his hands from their place on her ass, bringing one to her breast, the other down to where they're joined, pressing tight circles into her clit. "I've got you."

Rick presses two more tight circles against her and then she's gone, moaning loudly, the sound only slightly muffled by the barrier of his neck. He thrusts up a once, twice, and then he's spilling into the condom, going limp beneath her.

"Castle," she whispers a few minutes later, after he's returned with a warm towel and cleaned them both up. Her head's rested on his chest, her right hand tracing patterns across his torso. "We never finished our movie marathon."

"No," he laughs, his thumb rubbing circles on her shoulder. "We didn't."

"We could always have a marathon of our own… if you're up for it."

"Katherine Beckett, you little minx," he groans, laughing at her. "I will always be up for it with you."

"Mmm, good," she replies. "Can we just have a quick nap first?"

"Sure."

"Thank you," she mumbles, sleep beginning to pull at her. "For letting me stay with you."

"Mm, thank you for staying with me,"

She looks up at him, a smile wide across her face.

"Where else would I stay?" she asks.

"I don't know… a hotel? With Lanie?"

"Rick," she hums, placing a kiss to his chest. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

A/N: thank you to the lovely alex for beta-ing and sorry this took so long xx