A/N: this is dirty. This is going to involve the bonezone. I am trash, sans is shy, frisk is a manic pixie dream girl, what more could you possibly need?
Skeletons are single because they have no body.
Sans had given up. He really had, and he knew for sure, no doubt, 100%, that it was for the best. Sans had given up. And now he could be happy.
Because really, who needs a girlfriend to be happy? That's just weak. And of all the things Sans was, is, and will ever be, he is not weak. So he'd be alone, he'd go to bed alone and satisfy his own needs because he could and it would be better than this. He'd stop pretending someone could find him attractive, especially sexually attractive because he was a skeleton. And skeletons aren't attractive. Skeletons are things you date for the novelty, so you can go and titter to your friends about how interesting you were and they'd titter back about the 'bonezone' and you'd screech 'No! No no, never! Ew!'
All within hearing distance of said skeleton, of course.
And so Sans gave up, and it really wasn't anything to be sad over because it was his own dumb fault to think anyone could be attracted to a skeleton, a literal bag of bones. No heart, no pulse, only hard calcium and sharp edges.
And then, no warning or anything, he was crushed into the ground and quite rudely broken out of his train of thought. His eyes clenched shut against the pain, even as someone was cussing profusely in front of him, or actually, probably on top of him because he was still being smushed into the dirt.
They were scrambling off of him, and he chanced a glance at his assailant. It was a girl, a pretty girl, and if he hadn't just sworn off dating literally two seconds ago he might've fancied this to be the cliche start to a cliche love story.
They looked down at him, warm brown eyes wide. Then they smiled, eyes squinting shut as their face almost broke in two at the expense of their grin.
"Hi! Sorry to have to meet you like this, I'm Frisk!" She introduced herself while clambering up. A hand was shoved in his face, and he took it; surprise washing over him as he was forcefully yanked up, so hard his feet left the ground.
"Wow, you're as light as you look!" Her eyes twinkled with laughter, and he vaguely wondered if she was making fun of him.
"I keep telling everyone I'm just big-boned." He winked, though it changed to a look of surprise as she actually laughed.
"Y'know, you still haven't introduced yourself." At her prompt, he fidgeted.
"I'm Sans. Sans the bonehead."
"Huh, I've heard of you. Nice to finally meet in the flesh." She giggles while Sans stares, clearly unimpressed. "That was pretty bad, huh?"
Before he can ask what exactly she's heard about him, she's glancing up, her short brown hair following the motion in a halo. "Gotta go! It was nice meeting you!"
And then she was running off, faster than sans had ever seen a human run. "Uh... Bye." He said at her receding figure.
And then he was back to his last train of thought, as quickly as it had ended.
'Who'd ever want to bone a skeleton?'
He hadn't expected to see Frisk again. He really hadn't, with a school of 13,000 and no classes with the brown-haired girl, the chances they would meet again were minimal. So he pushed the thought to the back of his mind and went on with life.
When he went home that day, Papyrus seemed to know he was in a bad mood, and he did what he could to help. Which, in Papyrus's case, was make spaghetti.
It's the thought that counts.
The next few days of school he avoided his friends like the plague, unwilling to be the victim of their pity. They meant well, sure, all of them were decent, caring people but he was in no mood to be doted on.
So that's how he found himself alone, sitting in the same secluded corner as when Frisk quite literally crashed into his life.
"I was thinking I'd find you here!" It would make sense he'd meet her in the exact same place the second time, right?
"You were looking for me?" Confusion erased all other thoughts, even pun-related thoughts.
"Yeah, Undyne sent me out since none of them could find you." He sighed. So his friends had been looking for him. Guilt welled up in his ribcage.
She whipped out her phone and sent out a quick message, no doubt assuring Undyne he'd been found.
That was his cue. He felt guilty, but not guilty enough to actually talk to them. While getting up, he tried to explain, "Sorry, I'm not up for talking to-"
"I just told them you were safe." She cut him off. "They were worried, you know?"
He grimaced.
"Now tell Frisk what's been bugging ya." She commanded, winking.
"If I'm not going to talk to my friends, I'd be a real bonehead to talk to a stranger."
Turning away and shrugging, she sighs. "It was worth a try."
He finds he doesn't want her to leave. So when she turns around lazily and inquires, "You coming?" He is embarrassed to say he scurries right after.
"Where are we going?" He quizzes.
"On a walk." Is all she says, frustrating him a decent bit.
They head to the nearest park, a large ordeal that was more nature preserve than park. Out in front was a nice cream stand, and his companion stopped and asked for one. To be honest, he wasn't paying all that much attention as a flock of pretty blue and red birds had landed near them.
So it wasn't surprising that he was stunned when a nice cream got shoved in his face.
"Hey-what? You don't have to-" But Frisk was already walking down the path leisurely, paying no attention to him.
He hurried to catch up, and when he did he demanded, "Let me pay you back."
Frisk glanced over at him, nice cream in mouth, and simply shook their head.
He glared at the nice cream in his hand. Memories of the last time he'd displayed his magic tongue to someone played in his head. Their reaction was not favorable, to say the least, and as much as he was done with relationships he'd rather Frisk not think him disgusting so soon after meeting him.
So he bit down on the frozen treat. And immediately regretted it.
Owwww.
He noticed Frisk staring at him, a very amused expression on their face. He matched it with a glare, but that only caused the corners of their mouth to quirk up higher.
"I know about your tongue Sans. Wouldn't that be a lot easier?" He gaped, then grimaced. His ex was just the loveliest person. Of course she'd tell everyone about how absolutely disgusting he was. He could feel all his magic rushing to his face, and was powerless to stop it.
"Oh wow, your face is... Blue? You blush blue?" He had enough. This was the first time someone had become his friend just to make fun of him, and he was not going to have any of it.
"I'm leaving." He spat out while turning, determinedly making his way to a shortcut he could sense not far from there.
"Hey!" He heard Frisk yelp behind him. "Wait!" Haha, nope. Not gonna stick around for your mean mind games.
And suddenly he was being pushed on the ground, a heavy and somewhat familiar sensation on top of him. The rest of his nice cream had been flung somewhere, and Frisk's was nowhere in sight. What was definitely in sight was her face, inches from his.
Despite his best intentions, he felt his face flush again. He determinedly looked away as he struggled, which was stopped as she gathered up his wrists and pushed them above his head. He gulped. If everything else wasn't enough to scare somebody away, his strange fetishes were more than enough. Fetishes of dominance and submission, fetishes Frisk was unknowingly playing right into with their compromising position.
At least they'd made it far enough into the forest that was this park that they were alone.
"A bit sensitive, aren't we?" She asked, breath hot against his face.
"I have reason to be." He stated, trying so hard to keep the tremor out of his voice.
"Your ex is a bit of a bitch."
"Understatement of the century. But it's not just her. It's all the girls. They all find out I'm disgusting. So I'm done dating." Without even realizing it, he had given her what she wanted. He couldn't believe his biggest problem had just flowed right through his non-existent lips.
He thought he saw something in her eyes, some kind of reaction to his words, but then she's talking again. "Well, from what you've shown me, I think it's cool."
The hand holding her up changes it's purpose to touching his cheek, leaving her entire body prone against him. It makes him blush even more, something he hadn't realized was a possibility.
"Wow. You're warm."
"S'magic." He manages to get out.
"See? That's cool as shit." She's smiling, and it looks genuine, and he relaxes the slightest bit. "I might've had the slightest bit of an ulterior motive behind buying you nice cream. I wanted to see your tongue. Can I?"
He gulps. As much as he was resisting, a certain other appendage was slowly forming against his will, and if she stayed on top of him much longer she would become very aware of said appendage.
"If you get off of me." He bargains, seeing no other option.
She releases his wrists and rolls off of him, onto the soft grass. He sits up as she does, gives a shy glance towards her, and begins to take his sweet time forming his tongue.
She's extraordinarily patient, and soon he just can't stall anymore. He opens his mouth, letting his glowing blue tongue fall out between his fangs.
She gasps, and he flinches away.
"Oh!" She gasps at his action. "Sorry, sorry, it's just. It's cool. I think it's pretty neat."
He glances at her to see the most earnest expression his eyes have ever been privy to, and relaxes the slightest bit.
"Um, uh, well, you can totally say no but I just gotta ask," she pauses for a deep breath. "Could I, uh, touch."
He openly stares for a good minute before slowly nodding. Hesitantly, oh so hesitantly, she reaches toward his tongue and rests a digit on it. She trails her hand up to a fang, then down to a counterpart, then back to his tongue.
"Wow." She whispers out.
Sans has never seen someone look at him with so much awe. His face blushes even more, and she gazes at his entire face and repeats it. "Wow."
As soon as her fingers leave he dissipates his tongue and looks away. "Well, I certainly felt that in my bones." He facepalms as soon as the words leave his mouth, picking up on a dirty double meaning just a bit too late.
Giggles burst from the girl in front of him, and as though it's some kind of contagious disease, he starts laughing as well. They fall back on the ground and once their laughter dies down they talk of everything and nothing all at once.
When the sun starts setting, Frisk peels herself off the ground and offers a hand to Sans. "C'mon, I'll walk you home."
"Shouldn't it be the other way around?" He questions as he's pulled off the ground.
She looks genuinely confused as she replies with an uncertain "No?" So he drops it.
He leads the way to his compact two-story house, vaguely wondering if he'll have to introduce her to Papyrus. The thought sends a chill throughout him. As much as he loved his brother, which he really truly did, he couldn't help but fear his brothers... Overbearing attitude would be the final straw to send Frisk away.
Not that he cared in any extreme way or anything. He just liked having new friends. That was all.
He got his answer when the door was enthusiastically thrown open as they were mere feet from it. He sighed as the taller skeleton started sprinted towards him, and didn't even struggle as he was lifted in a spinning bear hug. Once he was set down, he turned his gaze to Frisk, as well as he could with the world spinning.
"This is my brother. Papyrus."
"HELLO HUMAN I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS I AM SURE YOU ARE VERY PLEASED TO MEET ME."
"Uh, yeah, it's astounding to be in your presence?" Frisk trails off, obviously uncertain on how to deal with this situation.
"WOWIE! SUCH AN INTELLIGENT HUMAN! YOU SIMPLY MUST COME IN FOR SPAGHETTI!" Papyrus spews. Sans can't help but facepalm, but when Frisk looks to him for guidance he just shrugs.
"That sounds lovely."
Sans felt compelled to facepalm again.
Papyrus had bustled off into the kitchen to prepare his "famous, gold medal winning, extraordinary, scrumdidilyumtious spaghetti of the gods!" Leaving Sans alone with Frisk in the living room.
"So, uh, this is awkward." Sans states, more to break the silence than for any real conversational purposes.
"You're brother is quite a character."
Sans laughs, a little too loudly. "Yeah, yeah, um if you want to leave I can make up an excuse for you."
"Never said I didn't like him, did I?" She questions, tone teasing.
He gulps, uncomfortable that he had assumed the worst of her. She'd done nothing but prove him wrong this whole time.
"I like your house. It's cozy." She was glancing around, and Sans suddenly felt self conscious. How long had it been since he cleaned his room?
Her face broke him out of his self-induced panic, her expression was bordering on wistful and it was a dramatic change from her normal smirks and grins. It was even a far cry from the face she'd shown him when she asked to touch his tongue... His face flushed at the thought.
Luckily, the spaghetti was ready and Papyrus interrupted his thoughts by announcing so.
As soon as the human had the first bite in their mouth, Papyrus yelled, "HUMAN, DO YOU LIKE THE SPAGHETTI PAINSTAKINGLY MADE FOR YOU?!"
Frisk smiled and gave a thumbs up, rendered mute by the spaghetti in said girls mouth. He couldn't help it, he stared.
He hadn't been aware there were people who could eat Papyrus's spaghetti without spitting it out or throwing up.
The rest of the dinner past with Papyrus bombarding poor Frisk with compliments of himself and other personal trivia. To her credit, Frisk took it all in stride, nodding and laughing in all the right places.
When Papyrus finally seemed to peter out, it was dark. "HUMAN! I COMMAND THAT YOU STAY THE NIGHT, THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL NOT HAVE YOU WALKING HOME ALONE IN THE DARK."
She looked to him again, and once again he shrugged. Her decision. He didn't care. In the slightest. At all.
"Sure, I'd love to." The fact his non-existent heart swelled at her answer made no difference, none at all.
"GREAT! HUMAN, I AM SORRY TO INFORM YOU THAT IT IS NOW THE GREAT PAPYRUS'S BEDTIME. I'M SURE YOU CAN UNDERSTAND IT TAKES A LOT OF SLEEP TO BE THIS GREAT." Papyrus turns to him, and he sighed at what he knew was coming. "SANS, MY BEDTIME STORY?"
Sans sighed, and turned to the human as he was following Papyrus out of the room. "Feel free to watch some TV. Try not to get too bonely without me okay?" He winked.
Frisk giggled, and he basked in the noise and the fact it was him who made it.
After Papyrus had drifted off into his usual deep sleep, Sans hurried down the stairs. Disappointment flooded him when he saw that Frisk had fallen asleep with the TV on. He had been hoping to talk with them more, but that just didn't seem like it would happen.
He sighed and flicked the TV off before climbing the stairs to his own room.
He could deal.
He threw off his jacket and slippers, but didn't bother with anything else before climbing under his covers.
His eyes slipped shut, and after a decent while of tossing and turning, darkness overcame him.
There were faces and screams but the faces were blocked out and the screams were garbled and somehow, someway, he knew Papyrus was dead.
Papyrus was dead.
Papyrus was dead.
PapyruswasdeadPapyruswasdeadPapyruswasdeadPapyruswasdeadPapyruswasdead.
PAPYRUS WAS DEAD.
He was screaming, but the screaming around him didn't change so he must've already been screaming and there was blackblackblack and then there was a face.
A real, clear face.
And as it split in two, laughter filled the air and drowned out his screaming.
Eyes flung open, but ohgodohgod he was still dreaming because the face, the murderous face, the dirty brother killer was inches from him.
Before he knew it, the face, and consequently the body attached to it, was flung into the opposite wall of his bedroom, hard.
Their figure slumped into a heap on the ground as Sans gasped and tried to regain his wits.
"Well-*huff*- that was quite the wake up call." The figure gasps out.
The voice.
He knew that voice.
Oh god.
He flung himself out of bed, getting tangled in the blanket and falling on the floor. After that he was by them in an instant, tilting their head up so he could look at their face.
"Ohgodohgod oh god I am so sorry so so so sorry oh god."
A shaky hand reached for his chin, tilting it up so he was looking in her eyes. He dreaded what he would find there, hatred, disgust, bitter- oh.
Her eyes glittered in pain, that much he had expected, but they were also soft and caring and he didn't quite know how to handle that.
"It's okay, it's okay. Just breathe, I forgive you." His breath caught at the ease of her acceptance. "I'm no stranger to bad dreams, and that sounded like a doozy."
"Oh god, I'm still, I'm so so sorry um um." He stuttered. "Uh, could you- do you think you can, uh, turn around?"
She tilted her head but followed through with his request, hissing in pain.
He placed his bony, hard hands on her back and took a second to marvel at the softness and warmth he found there. And then he started to send sparks through her, healing the damage he had caused. The human sighed peacefully, which he took as a good sign.
When she was fully well again, he stopped and sighed. Healing was never his forte, and exhaustion dragged at him.
The thought of sleeping was a thought he dreaded.
He sighed. There really was no helping it, sleep was a necessity, even for skeletons.
"I understand if you don't want to be around me after this." He muttered, upset at the very idea.
"Are you kidding? It was a mistake. You healed me. That was cool. And-" To his astonishment, she scooped him up in her arms. "It looks like you need someone."
Too dumbfounded to protest, he let her gently lay him down on the bed. He gaped when she sat next to him, and if it wasn't connected by the magic that flowed through him, his jaw would've completely separated when she trailed her soft fingers down his arm bones.
"So, is this why you're always so tired?" She asked.
He sensed a pun afoot, but really, now was not the time. Instead he nodded, not trusting his voice in the slightest.
She continued to trail her fingers up and down his arm, across his clavicle and down this other arm.
"You don't have to touch me y'know." He chokes out.
"Do you not want me to?" She asks, her hand stilling right on his.
"I don't want you to force yourself to touch me just cause you feel bad." He explains, looking at the ground instead of her. He fully expects her to pull away.
And she does.
Looks like she was done surprising him.
But then the bed is shifting, and he looks over just in time to see her sprawling out next to him. A hand is lazily flung over his ribcage, and he starts as it stroke the bones through his shirt.
"Whaa-?" She was obviously not done surprising him.
"Wake me up if it happens again. I'll be right here." She murmurs, face alarmingly close to his ear hole.
"Wait, but-" His brain was short circuiting, jaw flopping about even though he could think of nothing to say.
"Don't even try to get rid of me." She warned. "It won't work."
He rolled over to face her, and her hand adjusted, rubbing circles on his back. "Go to sleep." She whispered at him.
His breathing choked up, and he knew if he had a heart it would be attempting to escape his chest. Even so, he did, easily. The soothing circles she traced on his back and the sound of her breathing were enough for him to be willed into a deep sleep.
Deep enough he didn't hear her when she whispered, "What if I want to touch you?"