I am back (I seem to be repeating that). I just noticed that I've been writing these stories of mine for nine years already. In May I turn thirty and it scares me like nothing else. I wanted to write something dark once again, this time about darkness chosen. Something good always comes from bad, like flowers pushing their way through a forest fire area. Even in darkness, my happy ends are there – because we make them ourselves. Do enjoy and review!

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

Pairing: Sasuke x Naruto

Summary: His pitch-black eyes are constantly following you and the anger gathers into your fingertips. You have been mistreated before too, so what is one more, when it was your choice? At least he pays for your services, right? SasuNaru. Rated M for sex and language.

Disclaimer: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

When Kiba leaves through the door, I hear someone else come in. Sasuke's breathing is ragged and he is sweaty. It looks like he ran like crazy and like hell here. He looks pathetically cute standing there like that. I just vomit everything out. The words leave my mouth so easily that it feels weird how long I managed to keep them in. It feels so good and bad at the same time. Sasuke's face is hard to read, but no one would be happy to hear the stuff I am spouting. I go into enough detail to notice how all color leaves his face and he looks physically ill. He must be thinking his own part in this and how my recklessness could have affected him in more ways than one.

After I get everything out I feel drained and hollow, but at the same time light. We just stand there looking at each other, and I do not know what will happen. Then Sasuke moves, first a little and then he gets to me, looking something in between sad and angry. He raises his arms and I automatically flinch getting ready to receive a punch. Instead he wraps is arms around me and pulls me into a tight embrace. He pulls me into him and hugs me burying his face into my neck.

I am so fucking sorry, he grunts and I tell him that I do not need his pity. I do not pity you, he groans and looks me in the face. If I had known, I would have helped you in some way, he says his voice betraying him. You could not have helped, we did not even know back then, I smile at him. I could have treated you better, he grunts and I tell him that I could have treated him better too. He takes my face into his palms and looks me into my eyes telling me that he loves me and has loved me for a long time.

I just did not have the right words and I thought that you would never respond anyways and that is all I came up with, pretty twisted, right, Sasuke whispers. I just wanted you so bad, he then smiles sadly. It is me who leans in to kiss Sasuke's mouth. I like having you here in my personal place, I groan. I like myself around you, I tell him and a small smile breaks on to his lips. You do not need to push it, he says softly and kisses my face gently.

My skin is burning as we trace the steps to my bed and the kisses feel hot and suffocating. It feels like our clothes melt from around us disappearing completely and we are entwined like two pieces of yarn. I sit on Sasuke lap facing him and he keeps me so close to him. I want you to sit on me, he whispers softly and helps me so that he can enter from that position. In that position the movement is small, but at the same time we can bury ourselves into each other and Sasuke keeps breathing heavily on my skin.

The heat from our bodies gets us sweaty and sticky, the friction burning in all the right places. The sex is divine, sensual and something I have never experienced before. It is uniting in every possible way, beautiful and complete. I whisper god's name in vain and I whisper Sasuke's name until it starts to hurt in my stomach in a familiar way that promises a release soon.

The pain is perfect and amazing, keeping me lingering on the edge until I climax without hands, just him rocking into me. Not long after I hear him grunting and burying his face into the crook of my neck, and I feel warmth travelling inside me until his cock stops pulsating. We do not detach and he does not pull out. Instead Sasuke looks at me and kisses me softly on the lips. Stay, I hear myself plead almost inaudibly and there is this warm smile that creeps to his face.

Stay he did. He moved in with me and we are currently working things out, finding how we can fit together like this, differently. I am actually seeing a counselor and trying to find means to vent my anger and sort out the feelings I felt like I lacked and those that were always on their way to explode. It is not for us, but for you, Sasuke said when he walked me to the first therapy session. It is going OK, even though I do not really like to talk about the past, but my logical side tells me that eventually I would go crazy without doing it.

Even after graduating high school Neji and Kiba stuck with us and they were quite fine with everything. I promised to tell them about it all at some point and they know I go to a therapy and still want to breathe the same air as me, so that is already a victory. It feels good that I do not need to carry this alone and at the same time I am scared to share it. We have actually started talking and we both suck at it, but at least we try. I know that I love Sasuke and it may be slightly crooked - I am learning to find the right words to say that to him, but I think he already knows.

We are still under twenty and it feels like I am so ready already. Like all those nasty years were just so tightly packed and made me grow up sooner. I, on the other hand, perhaps made Sasuke grow up too soon. We are an anomaly in a sense, but it is not necessarily a bad thing. I look at Sasuke, who is installing our new game console on all fours, trying to find the correct cables. I keep thinking that this person is mine and it just somehow slips. I love you, I smile gently at him. He stops what he is doing and turns around with a huge smile on his face, I know, he breathes. Good, I smile back.

The End

Now I really want and/or need comments – do tell me we what you thought!