Jay had no idea how he was managing to appear calm. Inside he was a complete wreck. There was a crazy man pointing a gun at his partner and there was nothing he could do. "That's my friend in there." My partner. My everything. "If it comes to that it should be me that pulls the trigger not SWAT."

Voight tells him that hopefully no one will have to pull the trigger and Jay knew he should want that option too. He's a police officer his job is to save lives. But lost daughter or not that man is threatening someone very important to him and that stirs something in the part of himself he's tried so hard to repress.

That part of him is screaming at him to do whatever it takes to protect what's his. Screaming at him to draw blood. To make the man pay for daring to threaten what belongs to him. It gets even worse when he goes downstairs and sees it for himself.

Mouse looks calm but Jay knows him too well. He's clearly able to see fear in those beautiful blue eyes and it fills him with red hot rage. Mouse should never have to be afraid. "You good buddy?"

Mouse could see how close Jay was to losing it. "Its cool. Everybody's cool." He assured Jay. Keep it together. I've got this. As the door closed he saw a flash of anguish on Jay's face as he reached out.

He had to stay calm. He had to do get through this for Jay. He's afraid of what will happen if he doesn't.

Jay's hands clenched his gun tightly. This was the most important shot he'd ever taken in his life. He hears the chief give the sniper the order. His finger clenches the trigger. Then Mouse disarms the guy. Thank God. "What took you so long?" You scared me so much. Why didn't you do that sooner?

"I believed him." Mouse whispered. I'm sorry I scared you.

Jay hugged Mouse tightly uncaring about the audience they had. He pressed his forehead against Mouse's. There wasn't time for this now. What he needed to say shouldn't be said in front of all these people. So he reluctantly let Mouse go.

Later when Mouse has given Voight his report and they're home Jay held him close. He can't let go. "I would have done anything to get you out of there. If he'd hurt you…"

He'd felt rage like that before. In combat when he's seen his fellow soldiers gunned down. But he'd also seen what happens when you let the rage take over. He was already a killer. He didn't want to be a monster.

"I'm okay Jay." Mouse assured him. He pressed gentle kisses to Jay's face trying to calm him.

"I don't know what I'd do if I lost you." It's as close as Jay will ever come to telling him the truth. That Mouse keeps him human. That if he loses him he'll lose himself too. He knows it isn't fair to put all that weight on one person. But it's not something he can change at this point. Nor does he want to.

"You're not gonna lose me Jay." Mouse assured him. "I'm not going anywhere."

It would be a while before the two would be at ease apart. They both knew that. But they still had each other. They were still together.