Cath had always thought that revealing something she has kept to herself would finally lift some weight off her shoulders. For a few seconds the weight was lifted. But with the look on everyone's faces, suddenly her shoulders felt heavy once more. Perhaps even heavier. Now all she wants to do is rewind time to take back what she just announced.

"This is a prank right? You're just joking with us, right?" Cath's twin, Wren pleaded.

Their father, Arthur, put his hand on Wren's shoulder to calm her down but it was not working, "Wren…please be calm," he advised.

"How could I? She's leaving us," Wren spatted, eyes still on Cath.

"It's only for a year," Cath reasoned.

"It's still abandoning," Wren accused.

"No, it's not." Cath sighed exasperatedly and looked over at Levi who was just as surprised by her news as her family was. Cath could tell he was trying to give her an encouraging smile but failing to do so successfully.

"This is a big opportunity for Cath. Frankly I think she deserves it considering all the achievements she has," Arthur said.

Cath was advised by the Head of Department of English in UNL to apply for their study abroad program over at Oxford University. By instinct, Cath said she did not want to apply because that means leaving everyone she loves. However that did not stop her from submitting the application, thinking that she would not be chosen anyways. She still had not received news if her application was even accepted yet but she will any day now.

Wren furiously turned her head over to Levi, "Do you know about this?" she demanded to know.

Levi shook his head, "No but –"

Wren turns back to Cath who was standing in front of her, "You didn't even tell Levi about this? Who are you?!"

"Wren, it's just an application. There are other students out there applying for this as well and they only accept like 5% of them. I might not even get picked so just calm down," Cath finally said.

Wren laughed bitterly, "Oh please, of course you're going to get it. You're you."

Cath scrunched her eyebrows together at the remark, "What does that supposed to mean?" she asked.

Before Wren could respond, the nurse comes informing them that visiting hours are over. Wren grabbed her bag and waved their father goodbye without waiting for Cath and Levi. Arthur hugged Cath tightly, telling her that he's proud of her and that she should consider this opportunity.

Arthur recently was diagnosed with throat cancer but thankfully the doctor found the tumor in his throat before it grew. The operation was a success but he still needed to stay in the hospital for a while to be observed. Wren and Cath have been by his side most of the time. Levi visited along with Cath every chance he gets.

Despite being told that he had cancer, Arthur has been quite optimistic about it. Or at least that's how everyone else sees it. Cath could tell that he's been worried as much as her and Wren. Given the situation in their family, Cath decided to keep the study abroad program application a secret until it is the right time to tell them. It looks like she could not have chosen a better time to announce it.

Cath and Levi left the hospital room and to their surprise, Wren was standing by the reception counter with her arms in front of hers, glaring at Cath.

"Are you just going to glare at me from now on?" Cath asked her sarcastically as they made their way out of the hospital. Levi followed closely behind the sisters. He knew better than to interfere with a sister quarrel.

"I cannot believe you did this. And with dad in the hospital like this?!" Wren said to her angrily, moving her arms as she spoke.

"It's not like I asked for this," Cath debated.

"But you sent in the application. That means deep inside you really want to go and leave us don't you?" Wren accused her. "You know what; I don't want to talk about this anymore. Do whatever you like. You're one step closer becoming like her."

With that, Wren walked away angrily. "Where are you going? I thought you were carpooling with us?" Cath called after her.

"I'm staying over at dad's and I'm taking the bus. Don't follow me," Wren replied before stomping down the hall.

You're one step closer becoming like her. Cath knew exactly who Wren was referring to and it hurt. Cath did not know whether she should cry or punch the wall or just disappear forever. Levi wrapped his arms around Cath as they walk towards the parking lot.

As they were walking, Levi kept quiet which was an odd thing for him to do. Levi (and Reagan) were graduating in a few weeks' time. Both of them have been talking about their relationship, which scares Cath a lot. Levi told her that he was going back to Arnold to help out in his family farm. However he mentioned once that he would love to just start from scratch.

Levi graduating would end their college adventures together. Not that they do much other than hang out in each other's room and just cuddle with one another. The idea of Levi not being in UNL with her is odd. Cath would see Levi's million dollars grin a lot lesser. Not having Levi in school with her would feel like walking around without an arm.

Levi promised to visit Cath every once in a while and they were going to call each other every day. However the idea of a long distance relationship is not really Cath's forte. The last long distance relationship she had was with Abel. Sure he was not exactly her boyfriend (more like an end table as Wren put it) but it did not end much too well for her. If Cath was accepted to the study abroad program, what would happen to her and Levi?

It was then Cath realized that her relationship with Levi had a timer. A timer that could go off anytime soon. Would Levi not be part of her world anymore?

"I'm sure she'll cool down soon," Levi said as they entered his truck. Levi's truck…she's going to miss it so much.

"What about you?" Cath asked.

"What about me?"

"How do you feel about all of this?" she wanted to know.

Levi waited to answer after he started the ignition. Cath could hear the faint sound of his sigh, "I think this is great for you. You deserved it. Not a lot of people get to be a part of this so I think it's great," he answered, looking at her with a small smile.

Cath was not fooled. She could tell that Levi might be just as upset as Wren was. He is forcing himself to smile while his eyes look distant.

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. I thought that you were focusing on your finals so I did not want to distract you," Cath apologized.

"You should not apologize about this, but I wished you would tell me sooner. We tell each other everything right? But don't worry about it. I'm rooting for you," Levi replied, grinning at her while holding her hand and kissing it while keeping his eyes on the road.

"I might not get it," Cath reminded him just to give his mind an ease.

"Oh come on, who would reject what you have to offer," he responded.

"Even if I do get accepted…"

"And you will."

After pausing for a second, Cath worked up the courage to say it, "What would happen to us?"

Levi thought about an answer to give her but he failed to come up with any. The truth is: he does not know what will happen to them. The future of their relationship is just as blurry to him as it is for Cath.

"We'll figure it out," he promised her. This is a promise that Levi was not sure he could keep.

Congratulations.

There it is. Those are the words that Cath have been dreading to see in her email for the past few days. Now it's a reality. She got accepted as one of the students to study abroad at Oxford University in the upcoming semester and she would be away for a year.

Up until today, Cath have been re-reviewing the brochures that were given to her regarding the program. She read testimonials from students who took part, even talked to some of them. She hated to admit it but she was actually considering of going.

"Wow…" Cath spoke unconsciously while sitting at her desk in her dorm room. Reagan was also currently present packing some of her belongings in a box that she was going to send back to Arnold.

Reagan had told Cath that after graduation, she would spend some time backpacking across the world before truly settling down in one place. She didn't want to return to the small town of Arnold where she knows everyone and everyone knows her. She wanted a fresh new start and Cath admires her bravery for willingly doing so.

"What?" Reagan asked Cath.

"Oh, sorry. I just received an email," she replied.

Reagan walked over to Cath's desk and read the first few lines of the email much to Cath's dismay.

"I didn't know you were applying for studying abroad," Reagan said.

"I didn't tell anyone really until last week," Cath replied in a daze.

"This is good right? Hey, maybe if I could visit you in London when I get there," Reagan said encouragingly.

"Mmhm…"

Reagan lifted an eyebrow. She has been living with Cath long enough to know that something is bothering her. She sat at Cath's bed and braced herself for some girl talk.

"You sound so excited," she said sarcastically.

Cath sighed deeply, "I just…I didn't expect to get in."

"So then what's bothering you?"

Cath closed her laptop and turned to face Reagan. "I told Wren, my dad and Levi that I applied for it. All of them took the news differently."

"How so?" Reagan asked while resting her back on the wall next to Cath's bed.

"My dad is happy about it and told me to go for it. Wren is angry because she thinks I'm abandoning her and Levi…I don't know how he's taking it. After the night I told them, he's been quieter and distracted lately," Cath told her.

"Did he say anything after you announced it to them?"

Cath nodded her head as she remembered the conversation they last had in his truck, "He said that this would be great for me."

"That's it?" Reagan asked.

Cath shook her head and looked at her shoes, "Not exactly. I asked him what will happen to us and he said that we'll probably figure it out soon."

"Whoa…" Reagan responded.

After a silence, Cath opened her laptop and looked at her email again. "Maybe I shouldn't go," she whispered.

"Don't be crazy," Reagan replied sitting up. "Cath, there are other students who would kill just to step foot into Oxford University and the opportunity for you to do so is right here in front of you. Take the chance!"

"But then I'll be gone for a year," Cath pointed out. Suddenly it became all too real for her. "What about my family? My dad is probably going to need constant care. Wren needs someone there for her, especially now that she and Jandro broke up. And what would happen to me and Levi? Besides I might not even like it at Oxford when I'm there. You know how much I hate change."

"Ok stop it right there," Reagan stopped her, holding her hand out in front of Cath. "Answer me this, when was the last time you have done something for yourself?"

"What?"

"When was the last time you have done something selfish for yourself that benefits you and no one else?" Reagan questioned her.

"I'm sure there is…"

"Not that I heard of."

Cath leaned back to her chair and try to think about it. She did not truly realize she needed to do something selfish in her life. She feels like once she does, it might affect other people around her negatively. She finds that with every action or decision she makes, there's a ripple effect and results may not be pretty.

"You know, it's not a crime doing something selfish for once. At least once in your life, you have to put your happiness before others," Reagan advised her. "Look at me, going backpacking straight away after college. That's not what my parents want. If they had it their way, I would be living in our family home until I'm 40. But it's not what I want. I made my own decision despite knowing that my parents are not happy with it."

Cath continued to look at the catalogues in the email she gotten while listening to what Reagan is saying. There were photos of the Oxford University campus and some information about excursions to Dublin, Paris and Edinburg. It was just some of the places Cath had only dreamed of going.

"My point is to not disobey your parents or anything like that. My point is that you have to put yourself first. Think what would benefit you for the long run," Reagan continued. "It is better than to look back in 40 years' time and wonder about the 'what ifs' you could have taken when you were given the chance to."

Cath gave it a thought for a moment. Reagan had a point. This is an opportunity of the lifetime for her and she might not be able to get a chance like this anymore.

"So you're saying I should go?" Cath inquired.

Reagan got up and went back to her boxes, "I'm saying, follow your heart. It knows you better than anyone else."

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