Mine or Yours - Keep It Secret

Astrid was overwhelmed, to say the least. From all the things she had expected, going to a run-down bar in some narrow alley was the last thing that crossed her mind. She was not sure what to think of it. She was excited – yes – but she was also kind of disappointed? She had hoped that the two of them, her and Hiccup, could have some alone time. Lately it had been so easy to forget reality, to just indulge in the fantasy and dream Hiccup had unknowingly created for her. Time and place were not important, all that was important was that she spent time with him. She never fell in love before so she was not really sure if she had romantic feelings for him. However, sometimes she thought that it might be nice if these feelings of her were love indeed. She would stare at him whenever he looked elsewhere and sometimes her eyes would wander south – to his butt, and she would shamelessly carry on until he turned around. Again, she was not sure what these feelings of her were exactly… but it was a fact that she liked to check him out, imagine him in various ways, interacting with her in various ways. She liked the fantasy, because in reality he would probably never do it to her… or rather, not yet. She still had lingering hope that there might be more between them in the far future.

"Astrid?" Hiccup called out and looked at her worried, "Is everything okay?"

"What? Yeah, yeah everything's fine," she responded in a confused haste.

"Sure doesn't seem like it. It… was a bad idea I brought you here?" Hiccup asked with a hint of hesitation.

Astrid shook her head violently, denying his suspicion, "No! No, no… it's just, I didn't expect this so I'm still processing this- everything."

Hiccup raised an eyebrow. "Is that a good or a bad sign?"

Astrid shrugged and smiled, "Neither? I don't know, something in-between maybe?"

Hiccup hummed and sipped at his drink. He and Astrid sat at the bar, surrounded by nosy citizen who are just waiting for a chance to have a nice conversation with her as well. Although they may be nosy, they still respected privacy – well, some of them at least – and just sat far enough to hear a mumble.

Astrid played with the rim of her glass, lost in her thoughts. They have been sitting at the bar for almost half an hour and she still did not understand why Hiccup brought her here. "So… why did you bring me here again?" she asked in a mumble, glancing at him. Hiccup raised his head at her and smiled gently.

"You see, sometimes it's good to just, you know, run away into your own world. For me, a bar is one of those places where I can run to. Moreover, I'm not the only one. People from different families and different circumstances gather here, no matter the social standing, and talk to each other, tell each other's life stories. Here, we all are equal. I've been searching for a bar when I first arrived in this village. And I was lucky to come across old man Digs who brought me here-"

"Digs?" she interrupted him.

"Yeah, it's kind of his nickname. I don't know his real name. Everybody calls him that. He's the one who opened the door for us earlier."

"Oh, that one. Okay," she replied, going over his words as she sorted out her thoughts. "So… again I ask you: Why are we here again?"

Hiccup chuckled which only drew out a frown on the young Princess' face. "Because I wanted to talk to you."

"You can always do that without us going to a pub?" Astrid reasoned, still not understanding what he was thinking.

"Well, yes. But! Uhm… look at it this way; We've been hanging around for a while now, right?" Hiccup started, waiting for her to nod before he resumed, "And we've been kissing each other too…" He drew out the last part with a wary undertone. Now Astrid blushed and choked before nodding hesitantly.

"So, since I thought that… err… we kind of skipped the whole important stuff and jumped right into making out… uhm… I mean it would be nice if… we… could… talk and… know more… about each other?" The more he tried to reason, the more he questioned his way of thinking and for a second he doubted that this was a good idea.

"O-kay? I mean, I don't mind in particular. So where do we start?" she complied for the time being.

Taking it as a good sign, his face brightened up and ordered for two more jugs of mead. "Let's see… how about you start talking about how your life was so far? I mean, as a Princess and all."

As if she had already dreaded it, Astrid let out a long sigh, redirecting her attention to the rim of the glass that is still in her hand. "I don't know where to start. Basically, I should be happy. Normally. I mean, who doesn't want to be a Princess? I have a big room all alone for me. I have money, I have food, my parents love me, I love them – well, most of the time. When Adrian was born, all the attention of my parents turned to him. He is the heir after all. I wasn't really envious, I mean, I didn't intend to rule over the people anyway. I like to be the one in charge, but I don't like to rule. It's a position that denies people the freedom of choice and I certainly don't want something like this since I myself want to claim that freedom. And when my dad started to arrange meetings with various guys, I started my rebellion," she elaborated.

Hiccup nodded and sipped at his mead. He could understand her since he himself also did not like the thought of ruling over people.

"Well, with rebellion I didn't mean that I would start sullying the reputation of my father. More like, I would just go out into town from sunrise 'till sunset. I would avoid the duties given to me and just have fun with Ruffnut and sometimes also with Tuffnut," she told him, chuckling at the thought of spending time with the twins. "Literally, wherever those two walked, disaster would follow. Oh- Ruffnut and Tuffnut are twins, but you probably already noticed."

"Yeah, I noticed. Rather, I would be blind not to notice the resemblence between the two. Ruffnut is the one you hid yourself with in that tree when I came here for the first time, right?" he asked with an amused look. "Sure made a huge impression on me, that time."

"Oh hush, we were hiding from the guards because Ruffnut caused trouble in the kitchen. She ruined the soup that was supposed to be served for you on that day," she laughed.

"If I remember correctly, I wasn't that hungry that time anyway so I wouldn't know," Hiccup said.

"Well, yeah. Anyway that's pretty much my life. Plain and boring. I bet yours is better and more interesting. So spill, how was your life?"

Hiccup crumbled under the gaze of the curious Princess. He thought about how he was supposed to answer that. He knew that he could not just tell her about his real past. He had to make up some lies so that his cover would not be blown. "Hmm, well my life wasn't that interesting either. I don't remember my mother. All my dad ever told me was that she died in an accident. Whenever I tried to ask him about her, he would close up and try to change the topic. So at some point I stopped asking. Both for his and my sake. And... My life was actually pretty normal, easy-going even. Eventually Gobber took me in as an apprentice since he was good friends with my father and he thought that working as a blacksmith would help me build some muscles."

"So you were a toothpick in your childhood?" she grinned at the imagination. It surely suited him. She could picture it almost vividly, as if she had known him since childhood already. "But I must say, the blacksmithing truly worked out in your favor. I mean, you're not exactly a brawn but it's visible you've got some muscles underneath those clothes."

Hiccup raised his eyebrow at the comment and smirked, "How would you know?"

Shoot. She said it unconsciously without thinking it through. "Uhh, well. As I said, it's visible, isn't it?" she tried to reason.

"Yeah, you did..." he admitted hesitantly as he observed her. Astrid just gave him a clueless smile and waited. "Anyway, uhm, as Gobber might have already told you. Our kingdom was under attack and Gobber got me out of there. By request of my father." He looked down into his jar. Yes... his home was no more. And probably neither was his father.

Astrid sensed that the topic seemed to burden the young man and regretted asking. Since she had first heard about it, more and more people had sought help from her father and their kingdom. She had not been aware that Hiccup was also a victim of the Great Fall - that was how people started to call the incident. She did not remember much of the kingdom. Sometimes she and her father would visit them and she would just run off elsewhere, snooping around, seeing as she was bored and had nothing better to do. She had heard that Stoick the King had a son but she had never gotten to see him.

"I'm sorry. It must have been hard for you," Astrid tried to comfort him.

Hiccup just looked up and gave her a modest smile. He appreciated it but it did not change the fact that it was in the past. There was nothing that could be done about it anymore. "Yeah... anyway. That's how I ended up here, living my life," he replied and drank the rest of the mead in his mug. After he finished, he returned the mug to the barkeep and ordered another one. He could not just tell her about him and his true identity. As if he could. It would probably raise more attention and questions than necessary.

...

Hiccup and Astrid chatted away the night, talking about life, their ambitions and activities they did in their free time. Astrid talked about her studies as well as physical achievement such as archery, brawling and swordsmanship while Hiccup told her about his drawing and blacksmithing as well as his inventions. Some of them sounded crazy and impossible to create, some however sounded very logical and doable. Those that did, he already tried to make prototypes and fixed problems after problems until he did not have the knowledge anymore to make it better. As the two of them talked, they had drunken more and more mead. Hiccups walls around him sunk after each mug bit by bit. Astrid, glad that she could finally talk to him without having him act reserved, welcomed it wholeheartedly.

At some point, the barkeep stopped giving them anymore mead since he did not want to be held responsible, should anything happen to the Princess. While Astrid was only a little bit tipsy, Hiccup continued to drink, reaching the point of swaying and mumbling incoherently. Astrid was amused at how childish and unreasonable he became over the time. She took note to remember this place and bring him back here, just to see him like this once more. The people around were also nice and caring. Some men even joined Hiccup and started to hold a competition over who could down his mug the fastest. Eventually, Astrid became tired and started to yawn every now and then. Old man Digs had then come up to the Princess and told her to go home with the young lad. He would also send one of his men to accompany them safely since Hiccup did not seem to be in any condition to bring her home accordingly.

After bidding good bye to the people and apologizing for Hiccups behavior, Astrid, Hiccup and a huge man left the tavern. She led them to the horses they had left in the care of the public stable. The man lifted Hiccup and sat him on Toothless while Astrid just mounted Stormfly normally. The man then bid good bye as well and told her to come again once in a while. Hiccup, as drunk as he may be, started to sit upright after a while, which was good. Because if the guards were to see Hiccup in the condition she had seen him in the tavern, he would be in so much trouble. She just prayed that Hiccup could keep up the act until they reached the royal stable.

Sure enough, the guards greeted Astrid once they arrived at the Gate. Hiccup just nodded and tried to look as normal as he could. He may be drunk, but some habits and manners will always stay. However, he did not trust himself to talk fluently so he stayed silent instead. Astrid had thanked the guards for doing their duty and led Hiccup to stable. After she jumped off Stormfly, she helped Hiccup down since she feared he might completely fall off Toothless without any help.

"Are you okay?" she asked as she supported him.

"Urgh... I'm fine, I'm totally... fine," he mumbled and tried to stand by himself.

"Come on, I'll help you get to your room," Astrid declared and dragged him through the garden into the palace. When she reached the stairs her face paled. There was no way in hell she could carry him up the stairs alone. She looked around her and made sure nobody was around except the guards. She waved her hand at one who was approaching them and signaled him to stay quiet. He looked at them confused and walked to them.

"How can I help you, Princess?" the guard asked unsure at the scene. The Princess and the new guard that got assigned just this morning and how he behaved. He did not like this one bit. However, clever as Astrid was, she already predicted that way of thought and had already come up with a lie.

"Thomas, help me carry him to his room. I got a little bit ahead of me and ordered him to drink too much. Please don't tell dad or anybody about this, please?" she asked in a whisper with a slight smirk.

Oh, so the Princess made him drink that much. "Of course," he said reluctantly. It was in that moment that he wished he were not in Hiccup's position. So he took one of Hiccups arms and pulled it around his shoulder. The guard straightened his back and began to drag him up the stairs. All the while he could hear him mumble things, although incoherently. However, he never expected what was to come when he was halfway up.

"You see... I can totally understand you Astrid..." Hiccup started. Astrid wondered what he was talking about as did Thomas. They both looked at each other confused, Astrid holding a slightly worried glint even. She hoped he would not spill all the things they talked about in the tavern. Especially in presence of someone who could spill the beans to her father any second. She tried to lighten up the situation and cover it by chuckling, "Yeah, you're tired. We can talk about it tomorrow all day." Hopefully he would really stop talking unnecessarily about things that were private. However, unbeknownst to her, he was talking about something completely different.

"No... hear me out..." he muttered, "It's been hard, you know? I mean, my dad never paid attention, you know? He was always tending to the citizen, you see? Just because he's the King doesn't mean that he can just neglect his son, you see?"

King? Son? Now Astrid and Thomas got ever more curious. Could it be that they were about to hear something that really was not meant for their ears?

"I mean, I did everything he wanted... Gobber told me to take on his name so that I would have a fresh start, but you see... it just makes me even more lonely."

Thomas took a deep breath. Unconsciously he had slowed down in his track, so did Astrid, now more interested in what Hiccup had to say instead of bringing him into his chamber. Astrid tried to add the pieces together and gulped. If it was what she really thought, then this could actually be really serious. She first thought that it was pretty amusing how he lost control of his barriers and walls once he was drunk. Now she was not so sure anymore. "What's... your real name?" she asked in a low voice. She almost regretted asking at all. Thomas only waited patiently. He was in no place to say or ask anything.

"Isn't it obvious...?" Hiccup asked mockingly, "It's Henry... Horrendous Haddock III."

THUMP.

Hiccup groaned and lay spread on the stairs. Astrid had gone numb at his answer and lost grip on his arm and weight, thus letting him slip and fall down. It had come so unexpected, Thomas was not able to react fast enough to support the weight all on his own so suddenly. Well, part of it was also because the information also took him off guard. Astrid evened her breathing and glared at Thomas.

"One word to my dad or anyone, and I will kill you personally," she hissed and threatened him. Right now her highest priority was to keep that secret secret. Even if she had to kill off the guard in order no to let that information leak out. A part of her trusted him enough to keep his mouth shut. Thomas was one of the few guards who would always crumble under her gaze and threats. He was even about the same age as her. He had been assigned to his post a few months ago. He was actually new to this whole environment and Astrid used him more than she would like to admit to get out of the palace with Ruffnut.

"Do you understand? I want nobody to find out about this. And if this information should go around, I will know who spilled the beans. Keep in mind that I am more than capable of hurting you without even touching you," she threatened him and then went back to the task. She picked Hiccup up and dragged him up the last few stairs alone. The adrenaline that coursed through her blood right in that moment helped her muster up the strength to carry him to his room.

"Yes, Princess..." Thomas said in a whisper and hurried after her, making sure to help her the last few meter.

Astrid could not believe it. Hiccup was a Prince. He was royal. They were literally equal. Too much thoughts and feelings jumbled together and it gave her a headache. Since Hiccup had fallen, he did not say anything anymore. It seemed like he was fast asleep. Thomas helped the Princess carry Hiccup into his chamber. They laid him down on his bed. Astrid pulled off his boots and covered him with a blanket before she left the room with Thomas. When the door fell shut she looked at Thomas one more time.

"Swear on your life you won't talk to anyone about this," she asked him, this time more politely and without threats. "He's the first one to look at the real me. I don't my father nor the maids and guards to stick their nose into this affair. Promise me."

Thomas looked at her surprised, her words sounding like those of a normal girl of age. In the end, the Princess too was only a girl with desires. He gave her a genuine smile and answered, "Truthfully spoken, I'm too terrified of your highness, I wouldn't dare do anything that were to upset you." It was true. He really was terrified of her. Even more than he was terrified of the King.

Astrid watched his expression and grinned, "Good. Thank you. Good night." And with that, she went to her own room, temporarily satisfied that the secret is safe. As she locked the door, she began to change out of her clothes. Afterwards she fell on her bed and cuddled herself into a pillow, hugging it as she tried to sort out her feelings and thoughts. Basically, she did not know how to confront the fact that Hiccup was a Prince, a royal. Would that change anything between the two? Basically, until now Hiccup had even treated her as if she were in a higher position than him. But maybe that was only because he had to pretend to be of lower social standing. Would he remember what he told her the next morning? If he did not, should she tell him? Would that make it easier for him to converse with her? It would at least help her understand him better since she would know a bit of his background.

She turned in her bed and looked up to the ceiling. Astrid was tired and exhausted. The day was so fun. Never would she have expected that at the end of the day, Hiccup would let out such an emotional bomb. She closed her eyes and sighed. Probably a little sleep would help her mind and body. She would postpone her decision for now until the next morning and just take a well-deserved rest.

...

The sun rose as Hiccup opened his eyes. His head throbbed and he felt like throwing up. The last thing he remembered was talking to Astrid in the tavern and competing with the men as who drank faster. He stood up slowly, trying not to worsen his headache. He should try to freshen himself up and find Astrid to fill his holes in his memory. He wobbled to the next bathroom and put two fingers as deep as he could into his mouth, causing himself to throw up violently. Afterwards he took a bath and cleaned himself up. Had drank as much water as he could yet the headache did not seem to subside that quickly. However, he was at least awake enough to walk straight and normally again. Hiccup directed himself to the Princess' room and knocked the door. He heard something shuffling before a low whisper answered, "Whaaaaat..."

"Uhm, it's Hiccup," he said low enough for her to hear it. Another shuffling. Then he heard steps approaching the door. After a moment, the door opened a crack wide and Astrid's eyes looked at him. She frowned and turned away from the door, leaving it open. "Come in..." she muttered before falling into her bed again.

"Are you okay?" Hiccup asked as he stepped inside, closing the door behind him.

"I've got a headache and feel like it's getting worse every time I move," she replied and held her head. She slipped back under the covers and curled herself up, looking like a lazy lump.

"That's normal. Was it the first time you drank that much?" he asked her curiously, standing three steps away from her bed. Astrid pulled down the covers a bit, glancing at him.

"Yes it was the first time I drank that much. Normally I'm not even allowed to drink any of it," she replied, watching him.

"At least you got off with a simple headache. I had to throw up in order to make me feel better," he sighed and held his head. He felt a little bump on the back of his head which he got from falling to the stairs the night before. However, unbeknownst to him, he just scratched it off as an imagination on his side. He was probably just too tired to get a grasp on reality.

"You going to stand there all day?" she asked him in a whisper, slightly hoping for him to join her in the comfortable bed. Now that she knew that he was a Prince too, she felt no need to keep a certain distance between them.

"Uhm... I don't know if that is a good idea. I mean, I'm just a... commoner," he said in a low voice.

Astrid looked at him, her stare blank and calculating, "I don't care. Either you get onto my bed or I'm going to tell my dad about what happened yesterday."

"That is blackmailing, Princess," he pointed out but approached her nonetheless.

"Call me Princess one more time and I'm seriously going to consider it," she deadpanned.

"You seem to be moody, M'lady. Could it be that last night was too much for you?" he asked smugly, grinning at her as he pulled off his boots.

Astrid lifted her covers and invited him into her warm cave while Hiccup welcomed it gladly, seeing as his headache did not subside anytime soon. Astrid snuggled into him and let out a relieved sigh, "Yes... it really was too much for me."

A/N:

Hey there, it's been a while huh. It's a long story, but basically: I had no motivation and time to continue writing. To be honest, everything that comes after this chapter hasn't been thought out yet.

I'm gonna be in the army starting next month, which will make it harder for me to find any time again. I just got this week off and thought I might as well update. I'm sorry for those who have waited so long and thank you for being so patient with me.

Another aspect is that I have a serious mental issue. My options were to either go the a therapist or find a solution with the person who're closest to me. Since my boyfriend was seriously against it, it will take longer for me to change myself, but at least I will be doing it together with him instead of a random stranger I don't know.

Starting next week I will have to work again. At the end of June I will have some days off again and will see if I can spare some time for another chapter. To be honest, right now I seriously don't know who I am, where I belong and what to do with me. Right now I'm trying to find myself and it's really hard. However, I am someone who keeps her promises. I promised some people I would update this summer and so here it is. I hope you like it. I can't promise when the next chapter will come out exactly but do remember that I am not going to abandon this story.

Anyway, I thank you again for your patience and hope that you enjoyed this chapter. The next one might contain some lemon. I am not sure about it yet. So keep your heads up.

Date of Update: 9th June 2017

- KeGzZ