Hey guys! This is meant to be a funny and fluffy fic with eventual SwanQueen. I'm unsure whether to continue with this so if you like it let me know in the reviews and I'll post the next chapter. x

A knock on the door had Regina scowling to herself, not in the mood for company, certainly not from someone who was banging on the door with as much decorum as a dog humping a plant pot. The scowl on her face became more pronounced as she swung the door open, only to find herself face to face with the saviour.

"Ms Swan."

Regina sneered the name, taking in Emma's dishevelled appearance with an arched brow. She decided not to question Emma's unusual attendance at her mansion, but instead vocalise her contempt at the saviour showing up unannounced and unwanted. She said her name with enough venom to make the imbecile at her door as uncomfortable as possible. She wasn't angry as such, simply not in the mood to talk, argue or whatever the blonde wanted.

"Hey Regina..." Stammered the saviour with downcast eyes, shifting from foot to foot.

The absence of Emma's usual cockiness that Regina had come both to associate with her as well as despise and maybe even admire was shockingly absent today. This intrigued Regina enough to treat the saviour with a modicum of respect.

"How can I help you, Ms Swan?"

The detectable change in the mayor's voice caused Emma's green orbs to snap up from her shoes, meeting Regina's dark eyes curiously before she began to chew on her bottom lip.

"You see... I uh have a problem. A magical problem and with Gold out of town... I well... Didn't know who else could... Well... Uh.. help?"

Emma finished her barely coherent request with a small shrug, feigning disinterest in Regina's answer. Her panic stricken eyes, however, gazing into Regina's own alerted the mayor to the fact that something quite serious was wrong.

"You better come in Miss Swan."

Regina spoke with a small frown plastering her rouged lips, intrigue overruling her desire to send her visitor away.

Although she and Emma had been getting along fairly well the past few months, they certainly wouldn't label themselves as friends. Merely co-parents, attempting to be civil for the sake of their son. Regina still found the saviour and especially her idiot parents annoying and resented the amount of time they spent with her son. If she was honest with herself she did not hate Emma, the saviour didn't hold herself with the same self-righteousness as her parents. But she was still overly confident and Regina did not like the fact that Emma Swan was not intimidated by her the same way everyone else was. Well... She wasn't usually anyway.

Emma ambled into the mansion, immediately taking a seat on the sofa without invitation, her nervousness making her oblivious to the flicker of annoyance that crossed Regina's face at the presumptuous of that action.

"Magical problem. Explain."

Regina wasted no time with pleasantries. She considered herself a busy woman with little time for small talk. Taking a seat on the sofa, leaving a wide girth between herself and the blonde, she waited impatiently for Emma to start talking.

"Well it started on Wednesday…"

Emma muttered as she began recounting her experience with a small frown.

"Me, Mary... Uh mom and dad were having lunch together when I started feeling kinda lightheaded. That lasted for a few minutes before I just opened my mouth and started... Asking questions!"

Regina rolled her eyes at the direction this conversation was headed, wondering how on earth the saviour believed this to be a magical disaster.

Her frown deepening at Regina's expression, Emma sighed lightly before continuing.

"I literally had no control over what was coming out of my mouth. Regina it was crazy! If I didn't get an honest answer immediately, things started... Exploding..."

Emma winced at the memory of David and Mary Margaret's faces when there was a loud bang and the toaster exploded into a million pieces.

"... And the questions..."

Emma groaned lightly, suppressing the urge to put her face in her hands.

"They were just... Unbelievable. Very, very inappropriate. Disturbing actually. Regina you have to help me..."

Unimpressed, Regina stared blankly at Emma.

"What makes you think this is a magical problem and not just your incessant nosiness and need to know everyone else's business?"

"Regina. There is no way in hell I had a 'need' to know how many times a week my parents have sex, their favourite sexual position or whether they both... ... self-stimulate..."

Emma squeezed her eyes shut at the memory of their shocked expressions at the questions. Her hand shot up to rub her temples, a futile attempt at rubbing away the memory of their answers that seemed to be imprinted into her brain. Oh it was so much worse than the exploding toaster.

"I see..."

Regina cleared her throat, stuck between disgust, amusement and sympathy for the woman who was clearly embarrassed and highly distressed.

"Has this occurred since then?"

"Yes... About 5 times in that day. I've had to isolate myself... After I asked Leroy... Uhm something, I realised I couldn't be in the same room as anyone anymore."

"What did you ask?"

Emma simply shook her head.

"Ms Swan, do you want my help or not...?"

Her eyes still shut, Emma relented, murmuring an answer.

"If he... Has as much hair... Down there as he has on his face."

Emma admitted what she had asked miserably, another groan escaping between her clenched teeth.

"I see..."

Regina suppressed the small laugh at the back of her throat, glancing sympathetically at the pathetic sight of Emma slumped on the sofa before her.

"Well, yes, this is a problem. I can't have you asking these sorts of questions in front of my... Our... Uh, Henry. I have never heard of such a thing happening and have no idea what may have caused it... I guess I could do some reading and see if I can find anything."

Emma's green eyes opened to stare incredulously into Regina's dark orbs, a surprised smile twitching in the corners of her lips.

"You'll help me? I thought you hated me?"

"I do. It's for Henry. You're an idiot and I have no doubt it was your own incompetence that led to this... Oddity."

How can such an idiot be labelled a saviour? Regina wondered to herself, shaking her head slightly at the woman sitting on the other end of the sofa.

"Right... Well thanks anyway."

Regina simply nodded briskly. She took in Emma's grateful expression with a quick glance at her face, their eyes meeting briefly. Regina didn't care to admit to herself how pretty she thought Emma's eyes were. Perhaps she thought they were so beautiful because she was partial to cats; most cats have green eyes right? But the way Emma's eyes sparkled was...

The brunette was jolted out of her thoughts by a sudden outburst from her visitor.

"Shit!" Emma exclaimed, green orbs widening to almost comical proportions as the feeling of light headedness began to take over her body.

"Ms Sw..." Regina's rebuke at her cursing was lost mid exclamation when realisation dawned on her.

"No!"

"I'm so sorry, in advance. But you have to answer or bad things will... Fuck, Just answer okay. Truthfully!"

Regina's horrified expression was frozen in place, the saviour's eyes had glazed over and she took on a zombie like appearance. Regina may have found it amusing under any other circumstance. Emma's glazed orbs narrowed with sudden intensity and she opened her mouth, delivering the first question to the queen who was gazing at her with trepidation.

'Have you ever wanted to fuck a woman...?'