Warning: Contains ableist language and mild violence, like every other typical Valentine's Day story. Shout out to robotmonarchy for the amazing idea! I couldn't get the link to work but if you go on her tumblr page it's probably there somewhere- Trust me it's amazing go check it out!

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"Fry! Get your lips off of that sack of flour! That's for the customer's lips only!" Scolded Professor Farnsworth as he shuffled past in his slippers, his fists raised in frustration.

"Haww, I'm sorry, Professor." Fry sighed and pulled away from the burlap sack, which Leela tossed over her muscular shoulder with a puff and lugged into the ship as she walked by. "It's just, well, I guess I'm sorta bummed that I don't have anyone to spend Valentine's Day with again."

"That's no excuse. You can kiss all the sacks you want on your own time, but not during work hours." The Professor shook his decrepit finger at the redhead, then bustled toward the lab to go work on yet another doomsday device. Fry sighed again, and stared down to the floor that he was sitting on, beside the ship. Leela was returning to grab the last of the heavy flour-bags when she saw him in his slump, and rolled her pretty eye.

"Delivery in ten, Fry." She warned with a hand on her hip. "And where's Bender? It was his job to do all the lifting today. He playing hooky?"

"I think so. He said he was taking a 'Bender Day' or something. I just hope he's not filling the tub with camel blood again like last time. I've had enough exposure to communicable disease this month, thank you very much." Fry snipped, crossing his arms.

"This is the second day in a row that Bender's been ditching on us. You really don't have any idea what he's been up to?"

"I'm afraid not. But he didn't let me back into our room this morning. Maybe he's trafficking something. Like orphans, or illegal space aliens. Or illegal space-alien orphans."

"That sounds about right." Leela yawned and stretched before baring the last bag over her shoulder. "We should probably get going. Flour doesn't deliver itself, not on Wednesdays at least."

Fry nodded glumly in assent and heaved to his feet. "I hate Wednesdays." He murmured as he followed Leela into the ship. She knew very well that he wasn't pissing and moaning like this because it was Wednesday.

"Oh, Fry don't be that way." The cyclops scoffed as she dropped the flour into the backroom. The redhead took his seat by the window. "Valentine's Day is all commercial. It's just a dumb, made-up holiday to spike sales for candy companies and dating sites, and make lonely people feel bad. I don't have anyone to celebrate it with either, and you don't hear me complaining."

"Is that an offer?" Fry asked smugly (or rather desperately,) and Leela patted his head.

"Not in your dreams, Fry." She said sweetly and she plopped down in front of the wheel, starting Ol' Bessie's engine. The redhead groaned and sprawled out in his seat as the ship took off towards a nearby galaxy.

This trip was probably gonna suck.

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Everything had to be perfect. Everything. There couldn't be a single flaw in the layout, the detail, or the mood. He was nervous, which was very unlike him, but today was special, very special. Bender didn't plan all of this for nothing, and he soon found himself paranoid that Fry had snuck into their room already and it was all going to be spoiled. What if Fry knew about his DeepDarkTerrible secret and was never coming home because he was grossed out, or found it funny, or-or-or-?

(Relax.) Bender ran a soothing, silver hand over his arm to cool himself down a little. That dumb meatbag wasn't nearly suave enough to play casual, and Bender was positive of that. Just yesterday Bender had asked Fry if he'd drank all the beer, and Fry didn't even bother to put on a drunken poker-face and say "no" to avoid a beating. Fry certainly couldn't keep a secret, especially not from Bender. And the robot found comfort in that, but only a little, as he'd still have to wait for the next few hours in an anxious stupor for Fry to come home and see the monstrosity he'd created for him.

Bender stood back up from his seat on Fry's bed and straightened out the covers, fixing the petals that had been displaced from him sitting there. There were a few stuck to his shiny, metal ass, so he peeled those off and put them in place too. It was perfect, so the robot decided to give himself a reward for being so great, and pulled a cigar from his chest. That was a good stress-reliever, (in Bender's good opinion anyhow.) The whole apartment already reeked of cigars so it was no use to leave the room to smoke. Fry's nose was probably numb to the scent after all these years anyway. So now all Bender had to do was wait and wait and wait...

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"That was the dumbest trip in the history of stupidness." Fry groused, pulling prickers out of his eyelids and lips.

"That's what happens when you try to hug domestic animals. On Planet Cacti 09-Thornucopia." Retorted Leela bitterly as they climbed down the stairs, out of the ship. Fry crossed his scathed arms, pouting.

"Not my fault prickles look like puppy fur." He complained to himself, right before tripping over the last step, face-first into a inconveniently-placed puddle of something dark and rancid-smelling, splattering the thick substance all around him.

"Shmeeeeeewwww!" Amy whined from across the room, "Fry, you're gonna get that gunk on my spare shoes! I only have thirteen pairs of those in that color!"

The redhead spat gooey strings of blackish mucus and shook as much of it off as he could. "What is this gloop?"

"Sorry, friend. My bladders were full." Zoidberg interjected, "And so were all the toilets."

"Okay, that's it! I'm taking the rest of the day off! I'm done! Done with deliveries, done with deceptive cactus-dogs, done with Zoidberg, done! I hate Valentine's Day! I hate all of you! Especially Zoidberg!" Fry hollered, trying uselessly to mop his face with his jacket's sleeve. "I'm taking a shower and then I'm out!"

"Do it an' I'm dockin' ya pay!" Called Hermes from somewhere else in the building. Fry just huffed in frustration and marched to the locker room.

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It was only around twelve when Bender got the text. (Comin home erly. B thr soon) And his gut almost started to churn. Was the room ready? Was the lighting ready? Was Bender ready? He sure hoped so, because this pose was really starting to get tiring.

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Fry sauntered through the front door, soaking wet, because of course it was raining on this lonely, horrible Valentine's Day. What a waste of hot water, as the rain probably could've cleaned him just as well as the shower he'd taken in his opinion. Anyhow, Fry immediately noticed how dim the apartment was, considering the time of day. But he didn't think much of it, as he'd just assumed Bender was probably hiding from the cops again or something.

"Bender, you home?" He called, wringing out the rain from his hair-horn. That's when he heard a thump from deeper inside. "Hello?"

"Yeah, I-I'm in here!" Replied Bender's voice, muffled through the door of their bedroom. It almost sounded like he was talking with something in his mouth. Again, Fry didn't question it.

"Oh." And Fry shrugged to their bedroom to twist the handle, which surprisingly wasn't locked.

It was pitch black in there, sort of like some robot in particular had covered the windows with cardboard to block any grayish light of the cloudy noon from coming in. The only light there was came from the den's poorly-covered window when Fry opened the door. All the redhead could see was a muted, charcoal reflection from something (or someone) silver laying across his bed.

"Bender, why is the apartment so dark?" Fry questioned loudly as he flicked the light-switch. The room filled with a dim, romantic glow of false candles that had been placed all around the bed, rather than the usual, gaudy shine of their dime-store lamp in the corner, and Fry could suddenly hear what sounded like an ancient Frank Sinatra record playing quietly from somewhere behind him. Rose petals were scattered carefully, like a trail from Fry's soaked shoes to the bed, where a robot was posing like a model on a shiny sports car, a rose caught between his plastic robot-teeth.

Fry's eyes widened and he immediately turned to leave saying "Oh, sorry Bender, I'll-" But he stopped when he heard Bender's voice objecting.

"Ni-ni-ni-no." The robot corrected exasperatedly after he'd spat out the rose and facepalmed, jolting up to grab Fry's fleshy hand and lead him over to sit beside him on the bed.

"What is all this for, exactly?"

"Yo mama." Bender answered crudely, situating himself into a position where he looked most casual, and least like a nervous wreck.

"Bender, seriously. What is going on in here?" Fry asked, scanning all the pretty, space-themed decorations around the room, "Are we hosting a classy rave?"

The robot fought the urge to thump that dunce on the back of his head, and took a simulated deep breath. "Naow, you wet crouton! It's Valentine's Day."

"I know, don't rub it in." The redhead sulked. "Well, I guess you probably have someone to spend it with, since you have all these classy rave decorations up already and stuff. I'll probably just go get a drink at the bar, be out of your way-"

"Oh, jeez Fry, you're really gonna make me spell this out aren't ya?" Bender barked a laugh and covered his eyes, feeling remarkably awkward. "Meatbag, this uh, haw, jeez... I did..." The robot gestured around him. "...It's for you, Fry, uh... Happy Valentine's day." He mumbled stiffly, refusing to look at the man next to him. Fry looked around once more, then narrowed his eyes.

"Okay, where's the camera? Is there a clown in my closet? Did you hire a clown, Bender? You better not've." Fry accused, standing up to begin a search around the room for a recorder or a camera or a clown of some sorts. Anything that would sell out Bender's little prank he was most certainly pulling. "You know how much I hate clowns!"

"No, Fry, I- I'm not messing with you!" Bender exclaimed loudly, lurching to his foot-cuffs to snatch his squishy arm. Fry turned a skeptical glance to him, and Bender felt his interior starting to overheat. "I'm not, I'm not, I promise. Look-" The robot reached into his chest compartment to pull out a heart-shaped box of melting chocolate and cute bouquet of pretty, red roses. "See? No cameras, no raves, no clowns. I swear."

Fry stood there, very blankly for a few moments, casting his round, hazel eyes around at all the shinies, pretties and starries surrounding him. This was for him? Bender was doing a nice thing for him? He couldn't fathom why the robot would bother to put this together this whole shebang.

"You did all this... for me?"

"Naow!" Bender snapped, snarling defensively, but then his optics curved in shame, "Well... sorta. Just shaddup and take the damn candy already, huh? Sheesh, your dull."

Fry reached out timidly to grab the pretty flowers and the box from Bender, who was still avoiding any eye-contact whatsoever, just holding out the gifts. This was very weird, but for some reason, the redhead didn't feel the slightest bit uncomfortable. He was still kind of sure there was a camera in there somewhere, perhaps in the closet or hidden in his dresser, and soon there would be a video online called "My roommate is so romo!" But at least, for now, Bender was actually acting sort of sweet. It felt nice.

"Why?" Fry asked softly, not wanting to unnerve his roommate, just incase Bender wasn't pulling his leg and this was actually a nice gesture, rather than another dumb prank. The robot glanced up with defensive optics, looking ready to pounce if Fry said one wrong word. "Why, uh, all this?"

"No reason." Bender growled, crossing his arms, "Just tired of hearin' you whine every stupid February. Thought maybe this would shut you up."

"Oh. I- it's... beautiful. I dunno how to thank you." Was all Fry could think to say as he took in Bender's defensive stance, the lights and the music. What touched him the most was probably the little, star-shaped stickers and glowing paper cut-outs hanging from the ceiling like chandeliers. This was honestly the most considerate thing anyone had ever bothered to do for him on this silly, depressing little holiday. Fry couldn't help but to place a hand on Bender's shoulder, but he jumped back the second his skin made contact with him. "Ow! Jeez, Bender! You're like a thousand degrees!"

"That's not my fault! Why doncha keep your hands to yourself, ya noodle-sucker?!" Bender complained, throwing his arms in the air dramatically, and refraining from smacking Fry yet again. Stupid Fry, making him blush like this. He hated it. Why the hell did he have to do this? Why did he put this crap together and try to confess himself to that loser? Bender was already tasting regret, until he felt something soft sizzle on his cheek.

"Mmmaow-!" Fry murmured as he snatched his lips away from Bender's stove-top of a face. He really should've thought that through, but he was Fry, so naturally he didn't. But how was he supposed to know that his face would be as hot as his arm? Anyhow, Bender's face was one that needed to be kissed after all this work, even if he got a good smack for it, which he did.

Bender marched out of the room, acting awfully offended, and Fry accepted the stinging in his face as due punishment for his sneaky little thank you as he sat down on his candlelit bed and opened the chocolate box to weed out the orange-toothpaste-crap-filled chocolates and the bitter dark ones too. He needed this today, and he couldn't have thought of a more fitting show of gratitude, even if he'd tried. After all, it was only logical to show a little love to his best friend on Valentine's Day. His face still really hurt, but not in a bad way, not in Fry's opinion at least. So, there he sat popping chocolate after chocolate into his mouth and cupping his sore cheek in his hand. What he didn't know was that Bender was leaning on the other side of the door, doing the same, his metallic cheek in his own hand as well with a huge smile in his almost teary optics.

And both of them knew, it was totally worth it.

END!

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Thanks for reading my trash! And special shout out to robotmonarchy for drawing the picture that inspired it all! This one's for you, chicky! Go check out robotmonarchy's stuff it's fantabulous!