Alright so it's been a short while because I'm depressed, deal with it.

Enjoy

Lara's P.O.V

Wednesday rolled around fast, and I was sat comfortably on Bella's bed wishing I knew who in this godforsaken town sold weed. I had music on pretty loud, some first wave punk band, so I almost didn't hear when the horn honked outside the house. I groaned and dragged myself up from the bed and over to the window. I stared down at Edward, who was outside his car by the time I'd gotten up to look. He threw a lobsided grin up at me and I shook my head, waving a hand dismissively. I moved away from the window and pulled off my shirt, swapping it for another one. I'd started cutting up and spraying bleach on Bella's old clothes, just make them look that little bit more me.

I then grabbed a bag and purse, then kicked the stereo until it stopped playing before eventually heading downstairs. I messed up Bella's hair with both hands and shouted a goodbye to Charlie as I stepped into the fresh air.

"Sup, fucker?" I grinned, pulling out a pair of sunglasses, round and vintage, and put them on even though it wasn't sunny. He cocked an eyebrow at me and chuckled.

"You definitely don't need those."

"You definitely don't need that stick up your ass, and yet..." I walked to around and got into his car, slumping down in the seat and chucking my bag behind me. I pulled the door closed and waited for him to get in, getting comfortable. No seat belt, feet up and my knees at my chest.

"You're lucky I'm such a good driver, else you could die sat like that." He said bluntly, after a short glance at my transition.

"If only. But don't worry, I have faith in your Vampire reflexes." I looked out the window to avoid his glare as we pulled off. I was so done holding onto this secret.

He sped off, and I was a little wary of the speed. It was just obnoxious. But I did love getting to stick my middle finger up when he cut people off. "I'm so glad you drive like a fucking maniac."

"Vampire reflexes." He joked, but it was sour. I stuck my tongue out at him and started rummaging through the few CD's he had.

"I hate everything about you." I concluded, and dropped the last of the CD's back into the compartment. I then pulled out Bella's phone and reached for his AUX cord, only to find he had unplugged it and hidden it somewhere since the last time I was in the car. "Oh, fuck you." I slumped back into my chair.

"Surely conversation is better than music?" He offered, with a short glance at me. I rolled my eyes.

"Not with you, it isn't."

"There's some Debussy in there. I know you're a fan." Without hesitation I threw a pen from the compartment at him.

"Fuck. You."

"Your comebacks are a tad lacking today, love."

"You're sucking the life out of me." Pun intended. "We better do something fucking fun today. I could be at the school dance, you know. Having a riot. Getting unintentionally drunk off of the spiked punch. And then getting intentionally drunk off of the flask I was gonna hide in my puss-Jesus!" I interrupted myself with a yell as he swerved suddenly to dodge a car as it pulled out. "Hakuna your fuckin' tatas, Cullen."

He barked a laugh and shook his head. "You're charming, you know that?" The look he flashed me make my heart pang in a way I can't describe. Why the fuck did he have to be hot?

"Oh, I know that. I am an icon. A super star. Just, the best, really. At everything." I shrugged, keeping my cool.

"Apart from successfully washing clothes, apparently." He nodded at the top I was wearing, which had originally been a shirt that said the name of Bella's old school in Buttfuck Arizona or whatever. I'd torn it up, cut off the sleeves and sprayed bleach across it which left little orange patches where the black and gray pigments had lifted.

"Ok, this is a masterpiece. I am a fashion designer." I said, very matter-of-factly, looking at him with a dead serious expression. He laughed again and I couldn't help a little smirk. "You're an easy audience. It's pretty rad."

"Yeah, well you're actually pretty funny, so." He shook his head as he spoke, but his mouth was twisted into a grin.

"Oh, you should see me in my element. My old boss said I should be an attack comic. You know, performing stand-up routines that revolve around insulting your audience?" He nodded along with my explanation. "Well yeah, that. I should be that, he was right. I'm hilarious."

"You certainly have the presence for it. Why not, eh?" He smiled at me, but the encouragement made me shudder. All that did was make me not want to do it. I was one of those pricks who only did things if they were disappointing people. "So where did you work?"

"A garage. Lots of handsome guys covered in oil. Me, a vision of Aphrodite, covered in oil. It was basically a porno all day every day. But with no sex and lots of dropping wrenches on my feet." I explained, rubbing my neck. I really missed the hard work there, honestly. Kept my mind off shit and earned me money. And thats all I need in life. "I was saving up for an apartment but then, this happened." I gestured around us as if that meant anything.

"You didn't want to move here?"

"Nah man, not at all. Not ever. I used to say this would be worst thing in the world. I still say that but now I know it's true." I snorted. "Just wanna move into a crack den in the city and carry on with my life."

"That sounds dreadful. And very you." I laughed loudly.

"Are you fucking saying I'm dreadful, Spa-Cullen?" I cursed myself internally for almost saying Sparkles. He noticed, but didn't say anything.

"Would I ever?"

"Not if you wanted to keep your balls."

One his eyebrows raised. "I thought you'd decided I was a Vampire. Wouldn't it be a bad idea to attack a Vampire's manhood?"

"Yeah but in that scenario I either succeed or get murdered and honestly I'm down for either."

"You're down to die?" He asked, confused.

"Oh, totally. Down to fuckin clown, man."

"Why must you talk like that? 'Down to fuckin clown, man'? What does that even mean?"

I laughed. "I don't even know man, I just pick that shit up somewhere. I start saying things ironically and then it gets wildly out of control from there." I chuckled, adjusting myself to get comfortable. Just as I managed it, he pulled up somewhere and we the journey was fucking over. I groaned, but the sight of the city around me was a comfort.

"Let's go, we have to catch the stores before they close." He was out in an instant and pulling open my door. I dramatically fell out of the car as a display of displeasure but he caught me before I could sprawl on the sidewalk. I found my feet and shrugged away from him.

"Boundaries, Cullen. Don't want you sucking my blood." I reached back in the car and grabbed my bag before setting off ahead of him.

"Wrong way!" He called, and I scowled as I had to reroute.

I love writing chapters in which nothing happens.

Review so I can stop filling the void in my heart with poorly chosen men.

~I.F~